just turned 30

>I don't know why men here think the less sex you have the better
No one thinks this. This is absolutely not the reason men prefer women who've had less sex. If you think this then I think something is wrong in your head. Literally, who thinks this? Show me one person who holds this opinion. Literally just one. You must be absolutely retarded.

The anecdotal evidence I'm referring to is your assumption that because this person has gone to college, she must have slept with "200 men". That's just ridiculous.

I'm not remotely defensive, as what we're talking about isn't anything to do with me. I just think it's a bit pathetic that you'd try and attack OP and ruin his happiness by implying his girlfriend is a whore, when you don't know anything about her.

Whatever entertains you though, I guess.

And besides that, has a point. Why the fuck wouldn't she be able to satisfy a guy if she'd slept with 200 men? There's no logic to your statement, which suggests it was just an attempt to insult the OP.

I was into someone else at the time and was in a stupid phase where I retardedly passed on other women because I thought things between me and the girl I was into would eventually pan out. I thought my now-gf was cute, totally fuckable, and a good friend, but I was stupid infatuated with this other chick.

Meanwhile, my now-gf was in an on-again, off-against relationship with this other guy. Not a bad dude, but he was kind of an immature attention-seeker at the time.

I did eventually end up fucking the girl I liked my junior year of college, and I allowed her to string me on for another year, thinking clearly we were going to have a relationship.

She was a cunt. I was an immature moron who allowed myself to get taken advantage of.

I eventually recognized how retarded I was, got my own shit together (got a job in a law office, eventually went to law school, started working out), focused on real friendships (including with my now-gf), dated and fucked around from 22-25, and eventually realized I enjoyed time with my now-gf than I did with anyone else I had dated or fucked. She told me she felt the same.

I brought up the idea of dating one day over gchat while we were at work. After talking about it over drinks the same night, we concluded it was worth a shot and haven't looked back.

well, at least you arent married.

>The anecdotal evidence I'm referring to is your assumption
>assumptions = anecdotal evidence
Man I already knew I was arguing with a retard but why do you have to make it so obvious? Come on, leave something open to interpretation. By now you are literally holding a sign that says "I am retarded".

>I'm not remotely defensive
You replied to my one line post with a paragraph and now you are up to 2 paragraphs. You are incredibly defensive. Do you wanna talk? Is something wrong?

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Have you tried fitness classes? I have a couple friends who do fitness bootcamps via ClassPass and slay at those things. It's mostly single chicks, and all are hot and in shape.

That sounds completely normal, not this incel woman hating that Jow Forums breeds

lol, we've been close for 12 years, so I actually know all her partners. I have a few more than she does (9 on my end, 5 on hers, if we include each other), but even if she did fuck 200 men, who gives a shit? The only virgin I've fucked was my first serious girlfriend and the sex was terrible. I'm glad I never knew my girlfriend as being bad at sex, and I'm glad she's with me because we're a good fit, not because she's emotionally and physically naive and doesn't know any better.

>I have a few more than she does
And then it is all good my dude. That is all I needed to know.

im thinking of a being a programmer and dream of having an asian girlfriend, how do i meet one?, there seems to be so many guys who are competing for one so how do i be better them and find an asian gf?

Also interested in this.

Okay I just popped in cuz I read your last paragraph and I really want to put this thought out there. People need to stop saying that others are defensive when they use a lot of words. This is a text based communication platform. If you come here expecting to not see lots of text then you might be mentally deficient. Now I'm up front you a little bit but really I think you are just trying to deflect the argument on to whether or not the other guys defensive and that's a silly tactic if you actually have a point then discuss that. And stop ridiculing people for having a lot to say about something it's almost walking the line of trying to get people to not think too hard about things and if you claim to be an intellectual I can't see how you think that's a good way for people to be. So summary use valid discussion / argument tactics stop trying to cheese your way through them it's harder but it will help you to grow and making fun of people for being able to write more than a sentence about a subject just makes you look ignorant because it is an ignorant thing and to make yourself better you should not participate in those ignorant behaviors as a side effect will also not be spreading ignorant bullshit about

Your point is stupid. You say that I am simply calling other people defensive and not discussing their points but in all of my posts I have first shown how their arguments fall apart. In by pointing out that their argument is based on "assumptions = anecdotal evidence" which is beyond retarded. In for a similar reason.

After that, I call them defensive because that is what it is. Just let me tell you why that is: I doubt someone would put out a really dumb argument unless they were desperate and defensive. Just look at politicians and the kind of retarded shit they say when someone puts them on the chopping block. Same principle here. I'm just preaching the truth.

Eh, I think you underestimate how even supposed "normies" like me can convince themselves they're the victims of conniving shedevils. I spent basically all my downtime from 18-22 being depressed, wondering why the chick I was "in love" with throughout college didn't see what a perfect couple we would've been, and complaining to equally depressed losers about my situation, thinking our brotherhood of depressed idiocy would somehow help.

I'm embarrassed to even look back on it.

I eventually accepted I couldn't change anyone but myself and committed myself to fixing things actually in my control, namely career, friendships, and physical fitness. Once I started doing that, the women, the money, the friends, and eventually, the real relationship came along with it.

But yeah, when you're young and dumb, it's so easy to fall into these retarded traps of thinking you can do something to get some other person to change for you, and staking all your happiness on such an outcome. Don't do it, lads.

>called out
>does the same thing to the person calling him out

Smart.

I would define the moment I "grew up" as being when I accepted I couldn't change anyone but myself.

What's so stupid about it is I was *told* exactly that by so many around me, but I didn't listen. I held onto this impotent fantasy of this "dream girl" suddenly wanting to be my girlfriend and thinking that would somehow fix everything. I genuinely believed everyone just didn't understand how perfect we were for each other, and I actually started to convince myself that everyone else's advice to "move on" and find someone who actually wanted to be with me was evidence I needed to prove the detractors wrong and pursue even harder.

When I finally realized the problem was with myself, that's when I started taking control of my life and actually holding myself accountable. That's when I was able to start being an adult. And goddamn it's so much better than my past idiocy.

Learn to code and spend time in areas with Asian chicks. Really is that simple. Stop dreaming and make it happen.

It might be area-dependent, but I live in NYC and my aforementioned friends who hook up with chicks they meet in fitness studios bang a lot of Asian women. Seems lot of Asian ladies in NYC are into expensive workouts and work in investment banking.

>Happy people
Fuck off and die.

Lay on back lifeless with 200 men. Now she's a pro!

Why did you feel the need to create this thread to rub your so-called happiness on the face of anonymous users of a Korean cartoon imageboard?

I live in Europe, so if I become a programmer in the financial industry then I would be getting the best probablilty, I might be earning enough to be good enough for one, even if I earn a lot and go to a gym, would I be good enough?

google rat race rebellion

Would they want to be into a long term relationship?

Some do, some don't. Some might want a long-term relationship, but not with you. Believe it or not, but not all Asian chicks are the same.

Problem with trying to "get" someone in particular is you're taking the focus off of improving yourself and putting the focus on trying get someone else to do something for you.

You can't make anyone fall in love with you. But you can improve your odds at love by being happy with who you are independent of anyone else.

Women can smell desperation and insecurity, and they know when a guy is trying too hard. Try being more self-aware.

If I improve myself and get on the good course and have good career prospects which would make me confident, and I happen to have good friends, would they date me?, how do I ask one out? Or dubs one?

>dated and fucked around from 22-25
oh wow look at that it's one of these people again
you got to have normal life experiences and then come on here to offer what advice exactly?
At 25 years old I went through high school and college with countless negative experiences with women, today I can't be around them longer than an exchange of a couple sentences. You have no useful advice, fuck off

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Because I was once in your position, shitposting about bitches n whores not wanting to date me. It's fucking heartbreaking to see myself in so many of these poor schmucks, wanting to kill themselves because the girl of their dreams said no, thinking they have no direction, and ridiculously believing if they don't have the perfect job and a normal sex life by 22, then life is no longer worth living.

Anyone whose best days are behind them at 22 (or 30, for that matter) is a fucking loser. Life gets better as you get older, and provided you continually work on improving yourself, it'll keep getting better. No matter where you're at (ok, if you're 55 and don't have your shit together, go kill yourself), it's not too late to have a better career, have better physical fitness, make better friends, and be happy with your romantic life.

Do you ever regret only having fucked 1 girl?

The time when I was most confident in my self was when I did a work experience at pwc, I know that getting a career will make me confident and proud

Good career and good friends can only help. Will it guarantee a date with someone particular? Nope! But they're a necessary basis for being attractive. Even if you don't end up dating someone, you can get to know them, which can introduce you to a new network of individuals, which is a whole new pool of prospective partners.

Seriously, what it comes down to is first and foremost taking control of the things in your life you actually can control. Stop focusing on the end goal. Get a career, take care of your physical health, cultivate hobbies that allow you to meet lots of people, and always always say yes to social gatherings, even if they sound lame (you'll never, ever regret it). Women will come with it.

See We both experienced other people before dating each other, which I think was really important for our maturity. We know the difference between a good relationship and a bad relationship. We know good sex and bad sex. We know when to forgive and when to ask for forgiveness.

This is another stupid trap of being a virgin and being so deadset on particular women. You really want to be shit at sex with the woman you spend the rest of your life with? You really want to be taken advantage of because you don't know any better?

The shittiest, most immature relationships I see in adulthood are those between people who "stick out" relationships from high school/college well past their expiration date because the think theres something particularly romantic about marrying a high school/college sweetheart.

That was good advice, thank you

So, you're just an uber normie then? Fuck off Norman.

What does "dating" mean when it's with an old friend? I thought that the point of dating was to get to know someone.

No. You never were. You're a colossal norman who hasn't struggled at all. You have no legitimate advice, stop peddling platitudes.

Then why haven't focused on things you can change like physical fitness and your career?

>Be attractive
>Don't be unattractive
Thanks, retard.

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do u think this picture i took is pretty?

Also, how do I beat depression?

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Looks nice, but probably wont win any awards.

As previously stated, career, fitness, interests/hobbies, and friendships are the first step. If you're still feeling like shit, then get therapy and look into getting medicated.

Well I'm asking because I'm a 28 year old guy in a relationship with an experienced girl I lost my virginity too and we are a perfect fit, so this might last a long time.

>What's so stupid about it is I was *told* exactly that by so many around me, but I didn't listen. I held onto this impotent fantasy of this "dream girl" suddenly wanting to be my girlfriend and thinking that would somehow fix everything. I genuinely believed everyone just didn't understand how perfect we were for each other, and I actually started to convince myself that everyone else's advice to "move on" and find someone who actually wanted to be with me was evidence I needed to prove the detractors wrong and pursue even harder.

I blame cartoons and parents for this. We tell little kids that looks don't matter. That someone will love them for who they are on the inside. That if they work hard in school they'll get everything they want.

gf's and bf's don't work that way. You could rock the shit out of some math or writing or some other shit and they won't care. You can work really hard at getting that person's attention and they might just not want you like that.

We point blank, do not tell kids, that they can't date whomever they want because the other person might think they're ugly or have an ugly personality.

In short, kids take longer to grow up because we lie to them and they slowly and painfully have to find out the hard way.

I did precisely that
now I'm well-off with no debts and spend three times a week moving a barbell around
now what? Is it not enough? How big does my salary have to be to be able to experience the things that everyone else in my position had that I didn't because I'm a defective person that will never have the normalcy others do?

>haha just get a hobby bro!

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That's great, and if you're both happy you should stick together. If you feel like you've truly grown together, you're satisfied with your sex life, and feel you have a good partnership, more power to you.

I just know for me that experiencing other people was an important part of my maturing process. I had an immature view on relationships when I was infatuated with the college girl, and experiencing other people was a real reality check of what I needed to do to grow up and be a worthy partner.

I feel secure in my relationship because of my other experiences. If you're confident in what you have despite not having any basis for comparison, that's fine too. What's not good is staying in shitty relationships because you think you have some cute "story" of how you met when you were young or because "we've been through so much together" or because you think they're gonna change for you. Fuck that.

That being said, you're always going to regret *something*. I wish I didn't chase some vapid bitch who didn't love me back for 4 fucking years. I'm sure my girlfriend wishes she didn't spend all of college getting together and breaking up with the same guy. You learn from your mistakes and grow from them.

Yup! Also, bullshit about "quitters never win, winners never quit." Quitting is not only necessary, but knowing when to quit is one of the most valuable tools you can find throughout life.

That hot girl from calculus doesn't want to date you? Quit chasing her. Been playing basketball for 4 years and you're frustrated by how you still absolutely suck? Quit playing. Working your ass off at your job for 2.5 years and no raise or promotion in sight? Start looking elsewhere.

You need to follow through on things and genuinely give things a try. Almost nothing is perfect at first. But once it becomes clear you're in a failing enterprise? Quit.

All the shit about "never giving up" that made us good at school is almost completely inapplicable to everything else in life.

What's the point of getting strong if you'll just be persecuted because you used to be weak

not a question, just here to say I'm proud of you user

Do you have an actual message or are you just trying to brag about scoring a stacy?

Great to hear that user, you've come a long way and grown up. Ignore the naysayers, you're doing a service to this board by handing out advice. Just wanted to let you know.
Regards.
- user 23yo, soon 7 years in a stable relationship

I've been dating my best female friend from college but she's going to be going to Cali for a PhD program and I just can't afford to live there.

What do? I've never been this happy with anyone else.

Literally no one gives a shit about who you used to be.

Thanks, lads! Feels good.

I'm here to let anons know that just because you're a whiny, dateless virgin now doesn't mean it needs to be your fate. And that none of the whining will help. I so wish I had someone tell me when I was 22 to stop grasping at straws, just focus on improving myself, and everything else will fall into place.

LDRs are easier now than they've ever been. When I moved to NY for my job, my gf stayed behind in DC for a little less than a year. We visited each other every other weekend. She eventually transferred her job to NYC and moved up with me.

It's a tough situation, I'll admit that, and it's hard for the one who has to move for the other to be completely free of resentment. Does she plan on staying there for at least 3 years? If so my recommendation is to do long distance for 6 months and see if this is someone you truly want to be with. If you can survive though that, start looking for jobs in CA.

>literally no one gives a shit about who you used to be
this is false
there's a point of no return, usually murder

do you jerk with or without porn? and do you purposely pull out because you're afraid of kids?

RIAJUU WA SHINE

Looking for tips..

I didn't spend most of my life seeking friends and attention from women..I have always been in my own world and I have always been doing my own thing rather than with others.

My only social inter I is online or business meetings. I don't talk to anyone IRL except for business stuff.

Could use some help. I'm 30 and single/alone selling my business and moving 2k miles away...

Did I mention I'm successful but stupid socially..

That's true. If you do something truly unforgivable (murder, rape, kidnap, diddle children) you don't get to be your own person. But being a former loser/fatty/adult virgin? In my experience, people will only respect you more because it shows you know how to take control of your life.

I don't use porn in the shower (obviously), but I use porn every other time.

And my gf can't use hormonal birth control so we use a mix of condoms (during fertile days) and pulling out (during non-fertile days). We both dig it, so it works for us.

That sounds like a difficult situation. Do you have interests other than your business?

Really the best advice I have is to find an activity that demands frequent meet ups and keep showing up. You probably won't make friends off the bat, but eventually people will recognize you and will want to get to know you.

This

i hate it when people do this shit

>In my experience, people will only respect you more because it shows you know how to take control of your life.
going to remember this one, thanks

You know, I am going to take you up on your offer, user.

Let me preface my statement with: I am a loser and I know it.

I am 26. Last relationship was when I was 17, been single every since. Though, this advice I seek isn't about women, I know why I can't - or rather- why I am not in a relationship with a woman. I suppose what I want to ask is, how would I go about being successful?

I should also add that I have been going to a community college since 2013, but with so much excuses, a few car crashes, and a shitty part time job, I suppose I have been really milking the semesters a few classes at a time. Currently, I am very close to entering a program for a degree I have been working towards because it just so happen to be what I decided upon when I signed up for school. It was either school or the army. The Army is definitely out of the questions with the previous injuries I sustained from crashes and the like. I don't want to be stocking deodorants and toilet plungers for the rest of my life; that would just lead to my eventual suicide. It just kills me to walk around school, my job, the mall, or wherever and see people younger than me who have become respectable individuals: government agents, Special Forces, Nurses, Business Owners, etc...Thoughts, Sir?

tell us about how you grew up? give us a road map.

Did you get fit? What did you do? How long did it take?

Did you become more sociable? How?

Did you start doing group activities? Which ones?

lead us out of the darkness user

What are your career goals user? You shouldn't be sinking money into education unless you have some sense of what you're going to do with your education.

Don't know what you want to do? Find an in-demand niche, and get good it. Cultivate skills that will make you marketable. My girlfriend knew she wanted to work in tech and job hopped her first 4 years out of college. She finally settled on technology consulting for law firms and makes really good money. She didn't study to be a law firm consultant, but she learned a bunch of languages which showed she was adaptable.

I don't know what the market is like where you live (or where you want to live), but figure out where there is need and get the skills to be a valuable employee.

Don't follow your dreams. Go where the jobs are.

This isn't /r9gay/, ol' chap.

If I went back to school for a second bachelor's at almost 30, do you think I could still find a woman that will stick by me throughout and eventally marry once I earn it?

>Don't follow your dreams. Go where the jobs are.

That is actually valuable advice that I appreciate. Thank you very much. I suppose the only thing holding me back is leaving my mother on her own. She is old and lonely. I see it in her face every morning. It wouldn't be such a problem if she was okay with moving away, but this area is her "home" and she wouldn't want to be anywhere else. On top of that, she'd rather die then go to a convalescent home. I'm a bit of a momma's boy, so I will take your advice in stride while juggling the complications of motherly love. Thank you, user.

Dont be fooled you are still retarded.

Well, she says I'm the most mature guy she's ever had. I consider myself more of a manchild in many regards, but I guess I can be quite mature in the emotional department.

I try not to think about missing out on experiences, because there's just no point. However she occasionally brings that topic up and makes a good argument for it, which can be painful.