ITT: Sex Advice

The love doctor is in. Ask away and I'll help you in your sexual endeavors.

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25 virgin. Had gf for a year so I have young teen levels of experience. Tips on making first time not an utter embarassment. I know it will but trying to salvage as much as possible.

Why is there so much blood when I stick it in the poop shoot?

Not OP but in your situation its more likely you'll have problems being soft and not cumming than cumming too fast, I'd say dont jerk off too much leading up to it (whatever a normal amount is to you do it or less, not more). When it happens spend a lot of time doing foreplay, not just for her but for you. When you stick it in dont go tooooo fast but mainly just try to have a good time fucking her and enjoying her body, don't worry too much about how long its supposed to be. Be sure to switch positions occasionally, makes the sex longer and better for both and if you dont do both doggy and missionary you dont get the whole experience.

My first recommendation is to not focus on so hard on losing your V-Card, or that you are a virgin. I'll give you some perspective to help with this.

When it comes to having sex for the first time with another, regardless of whether you've had sex before, you still have to learn that particular person's body. To be clear, I mean that, not just in how to turn them on, but the actual, physical maneuvering of their body during sex to make it work and be comfortable and enjoyable for both parties. Maybe their knees are weak. Maybe their vagina has a downward or upward tilt inside of them that makes an angle difficult. Maybe they struggle to get wet until their legs are up in the air because that, for some reason, really gets her going. What I mean is, it can often be messy and complicated even for someone who's had sex before, so don't sweat it.

My advice? Be receptive, first and foremost, and relax. Don't view it as a performance, but as a way to make your partner feel good and you feel good. Lots of foreplay before and during. Please use lube, water-based preferred, it makes everything easier. Don't be afraid to talk to your partner during sex, to ask her how she's doing, if she likes X, if she wants Y. It also helps to have not jerked off recently to maintain an erection against nerves. You'll likely come either "too" fast or not at all your first time, and that's okay. Just switch to foreplay if its too much or your dick is done early, make her come as much as she wants, and trust me, she won't be thinking about much of anything bad then.

Lube. You need a stupid amount of lube for butt stuff. Unless you're going to, at any point that session, use silicone toys, silicone lube works better for anal play than water-based lube. If the lube is more of a gel, even better. Going slow at first will also reduce tearing and bleeding, as well as not taking too much than your ass is okay with.

Almost had sex with my ex. She had issues to make it short. Once it went towards the serious stuff she looked at me like I am about to murder or torture her. A tiny shake of the head to make me stop. That moment hit my feels real bad because I really loved her back in the time.

Also lost hard on after grinding. Probably felt her starting to get scared and my subconcious reacted accordingly killing my mood.

I'm sorry to hear that user. Assuming she wasn't just not into you, she sounds like she may have experienced some kind of sexual trauma, which makes tackling sex a much more... complicated affair, one I'm well-versed in as well.

Either way, that isn't particularly normal behavior, so I wouldn't stress about it happening again.

If I'm practicing semen retention, when should I call it quits when having sex?

There's literally no way of me knowing when you need to stop so you don't bust during sex, regardless of the reason. In my experience with edging, I'd say the moment you start building is when you stop, to ensure it doesn't end up happening.

I'm talking about for the girl. I'm not going to bust one period.

Too much stress from work and and exams gave me trouble maintaining an erection.

Anything I can do other than waiting for the stressful period to pass or taking dick pills?

Anyway. Would you recommend surgery to treat a grade 3 varicocele?

And a mild case of phimosis? Can pull it back but with big difficulty and under extreme strain with a max erection. Did strech it but did not bother after some time. Can this turn into a problem during sex?

Oh shit, my bad. It really depends on the girl and what kind of sex she likes then. Some girls are done after one orgasm because they get too hypersensitive, others can stack orgasms one after the other, and a lot of girls can't even come from penetrative sex at all. So, my first recommendation would be to ask her how she likes to have sex, and then proceed with what she wants until she's satisfied. For example, some girls are very vocal, and often get quieter when they've reached peak hypersensitivity levels and can't build anymore without pain.

It's all about knowing the girl you're fucking, her wants, her limits, and the telltale signs she gives to indicate otherwise. When in doubt, ask while banging. Good sex is all about communication.

How long have you been struggling to maintain an erection? And, are you on any antidepressants or mood stabilizers? Those can be erection killers for a lot of men and women.

I'm a love doctor, not an actual doctor. I recommend talking to your GP about this, not me.

I'm going to be having my GF over on Wednesday, we've been dating a little more than a month, and it's just going to be the two of us. We've already kissed, but I don't know what to do if it goes past that. I don't want to have sex with her because of my religious beliefs, but what if she still wants it? What the fuck am I supposed to do?

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>How long have you been struggling to maintain an erection?
For a bit more than a week, maybe.
Talking about sex here, masturbation works here.

You can cross off too much masturbation/porn (since I barely do those anymore), or performance anxiety (since I'm very comfortable with my gf).
No medication involved.

It's just that I've been working fulltime for the past 4 montsh, while going to classes in the evenings and right now I have one exam after another and some presentation. At this point I'm pretty burnt out.

Is threesomes or couple swing something to pursue with a long term gf/bf? What changes if I plan to marry her? Is trying at least once a good thing?

Okay, I have a question. Sometimes, before I'm going to have sex or to masturbate I really feel like taking a shit. It's very uncomfortable, I'm a guy by the way.

No one needs a sex expert. Just understand that all women want now is to be fed and choked. That is all.

GF wont turn me on anymore.I have a wide range of /d/ level fetishes but wasn't an issue since i could get a hard on with anything back then, when we met (23yo). Now, 5 years later, i struggle to even get a hard on.

"Stop watching porn/d/shit"

I tried, but fuck, my brain is hard wired to get off to that shit. Gorgeous woman do nothing to me anymore.

Do im perma fucked?

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Have you discussed your religious convictions to her? Is she aware that it is how you feel?

I think riding the storm is your only real option, as shitty as it is to say. It's fine to have sexual slumps because life is eating your dick off. If your girlfriend is worth her salt, she should be very understanding.

I'm going to assume you mean swinging as in, sleeping with others, as opposed to swing dancing. I personally find swinging with another partner enjoyable, but your mileage may definitely vary. That being said, a good chunk of swingers are married to begin with, so swinging doesn't necessitate lack of commitment so much as a different set of core values.

At the end of the day, if both parties want to do it and express genuine interest, (not an, oh okay I guess), and you do it together as a couple, it can be a lot of fun. You have to accept, however, that it will change your relationship dynamic, for better or worse. Only do it if you truly want the experience and are okay with things changing. The biggest mistake newbie swingers make is that it'll just spice up your life and everything returns to this golden, past ideal. Don't use it to go backwards, but instead, to grow together and go forwards.

I could go on forever about this topic, but I will leave it at that unless you have further questions.

Haven't heard of this one before. Have you had a prostate exam?

I am an incredibly kinky individual. I'm a firm believer that, if this person truly is your life partner, you will have to share your fetishes and kinks and every dirty little secret eventually. That being said, what are your fetishes? This will change my approach at advice, because being ashamed you like chicks with dicks is not nearly as hard to explain as amputee fart porn.

how do i mastorbate

>It's fine to have sexual slumps because life is eating your dick off. If your girlfriend is worth her salt, she should be very understanding.
She is and would have been fine to ride it out till the end (it's just 4 more weeks). I still opted for bones pills, because it's the better option and I'm not too proud to use them.

As long as you follow precautions, I'm sure they'd be fine. I try to avoid any kind of medication like that, not out of pride, but because side effects in that vein scare me. Plus, I've never needed them.

How do I fool some woman into thinking I'm good enough to reproduce with

The first question you have to answer is why, exactly, you want children. What are the underlying motivations there?

Talk to her. This is important for you so you need your partner to be on the same page. Why hide it if it's important to you? I'm not saying you're hiding, but that you need to talk about it sooner than later. This way you know if it is a deal breaker for her and if it is, consider splitting up.

Curious, about the response... I think a man is trying to fool me into reproducing with him.

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Tips on kissing? I realized recently I fucking suck at this.

Ah, kissing. I only recently developed a taste for kissing. My first question is what, exactly, you are doing now that sucks so bad?

Was over confident and tried sticking my tongue in at the wrong times. Didn't really understand how slow kissing should work and ruined the moment.

just got a tongue piercing and im afraid of giving a blowjob and hurting my man with it somehow
any tips to make it easier?

What, is it sharp? Tongue piercings do no harm at all to a bj, it's another surface you can apply to his dick.

nah its brand new and im on the second week of healing now, just really spooked for when its fully healed and i get new jewelry for it

im scared i might be gay/trans. how do i know for sure without therapy?
i dont want to be a fag

stop looking at gay and trans porn

i dont

Hey doc i really need help with this one; I have this cute guy friend who i think is bisexual. How do i ask him if he wants to fuck? It will be wierd if he is not bi, i donno what to do; Should i flirt with him or what?

I get very uncomfortable when touched and in general have a lot of (perhaps not so) hidden sexual repression. I have backed out on a lot of women because of this, but would really like to get over it.

Virgin here.
Been seeing this girl for a month.
We've done everything except penetration.

This being said, how common is pre-cum?

Extended make out sessions makes me pre cum like the size of a quarter through my shorts at times.

I have full on came from kissing on multiple occasions. Honestly not sure how the hell I am supposed to last inside a woman if this keeps happening.

bump

My wife and I are having intimacy issues recently. We've only been married for a year, but have been together for 10 years. We've had a couple dry spells, but overall an active sex life. This past year, for some reason, sexual anxiety (which I've always had a bit of, on and off) hot me hard for some reason, and had several bad spells. I essentially get nervous, so nervous its hard to achieve and erection. Likewise, I feel like my wife, over time, got too comfortable with being inactive in sex, and became, I don't want to quite a say a dead fish, but expected me to do all the work, to the point where getting some head to get me going seemed to bore her, and almost 100% of the foreplay was focused on me getting her going, and almost no reciprocation. This over time, I think, made my anxiety worse, and my anxiety made her receptiveness worse....and now things are pretty shitty the past couple months. Sex has been rare and awkward the past couple months, and I feel like we both want to get over it (we keep saying we're going to, and trying but kinda failing). We're caught ion this negative loop now, and I'm not sure what to do to get out of it. Any advice at all would be appreciated.

i went on birth control so that i could have sex with my boyfriend. then the birth control destroyed my labido and i kept trying to make him happy but i was very dry and not into it and id have to stop. he feels insecure that im just not into him but i dont think thats the case. im off birth control hoping my sex drive will come back but im scared it might not and i have had really bad anxiety for a while just worrying about meeting him again and letting him down. i love him so much and i want to make him happy but im scared i wont get it back and its eating me up inside its all i can think about. what do i do?

I have 2 exes. I think of one when i'm bored out of my mind, i wanna talk to her just to see what's up. I think of the other when i'm lonely, i want her back, i want to tell her that it didn't have to end like this.
Is that normal?
Also, where do i find a girl? I met both of them under weird circumstances, it just sort of happened.

Have you talked with your wife about it? You'd be amazed what you can accomplish when you have a honest talk about what's bothering you.

I was like you some months ago, but I'm the woman in the relationship. My bf got really complacent with sex, foreplay was nonexistent and he'd last about 5 minutes. Sex just felt like a burden for me, it was very one sided and I wasn't enjoying it anymore. One day I just broke down and told him everything that was bothering me, since then our sex life is better than ever. If your wife is a rational woman, she will listen and understand. Maybe try spicing up your sex life too, do some stuff you never did before (there's a site called mojoupgrade, do the test with her).

I often cum in 30 seconds when I have sex with my GF. We focus on mutual foreplay, so I always make sure that she cums first but the sex is not really enjoyable like this. If I stop my orgasm by changing position or pace, I always get soft after a few minutes and I am not able to cum at all.

I also masturbate like 2-3 times a day, however here is a similar problem (not always, but I cum really fast as well).

What can I do?

Have you tried the condoms with numbing agent? Durex makes some, I think it's the "extended pleasure" ones or something.

How to get and keep a boner on meth plz

The chute was designed to be one-way. Try the other hole next to it instead.

My wife (her 26yo, me 33yo, together for 5 years) has never had an orgasm while another person is in the room. She can only cum by humping a pillow or blanket while alone.
Having had sex with other women who had multiple orgasms before, it feels like sex with the wife is getting a bit 'meh'.
She doesn't seem to care about the lack of orgasms, but is almost always unenthusiastic during sex. She keeps saying that she want to 'work on it' - I suggested she tries masturbating with me in the same room to start with, but I often find her masturbating by herself anyway.

tl;dr: wife is anorgasmic and I miss being able to give women orgasms. how fucked am I?

why can't i masturbate? i'm a 19 year old guy, never done it before, i have urges, get hard easy and really want to just let my sexual frustration out but i can never finish and it hurts after i give up, i was molested when i was little so do you think the mental anxiety has something to do with it? thanks

my advice is to take everything super slow. focus on her breathing and try to really feel every little touch of your lips and tongues. don't set out with a goal in mind like you have to blow her mind with some tongue swirling bullshit, just go suuuuuuper slow and move your mouth in the way that feels natural and you'll really melt and so will she

I have problems with finding positions with my bf, it often hurts me and I can't help it. The only position I feel comfortable is doggy style but he wants to see my face, to switch positions and such. I suggested longer preludes and making out but he says that when it's too long he looses it. When being extra horny I feel ok with face-to face but it's rare.

Hey boss, I'm fucked.

In my 19 years I've managed to have 1 girlfriend for 1 year, and I fucked it up believing she deserved better than me. Its been 3 years closing on 4 , she got a new guy in a month, and I'm here alone.

Anyway the issue is I cannot move on.

I tried to erase her from my life, but she came back either through reminders, or if i managed to avoid that, in my dreams despite not thinking about her. It came in waves, but recently about 3 months ago it came full force, so i decided if I cannot ignore it I need to do something.

I decided to look through both her and her bfs social media in an attempt to nuke my feelings, and the opposite happened. The more time has passed the worse it has gotten.

I've been thinking maybe I just need another girl, but i fucking suck at the whole attraction thing.

How can I sort myself out? This has been fucking the life out of my final years of my youth and I know if I don't do something quick I'll have one fun mid life crisis to deal with in a few years.

Idiot. I just want to beat you up

It can take up to 3 or months before you start to see you libido return to normal. Hormones are a hell of a drug

go to therapy.

it's not normal for sex to hurt. please see a gyn.

Been in literally your shoes.
Thankfully it does get better but it requires you to actually see and spend time with other girls.
See, this beautiful thing called biology will kick in and the pain has a funny way of receding when you're railing your new gfs' brains in.
I was 100% convinced my gf when I was 18/19 was the one. Now I'm dating a more successful, beautiful and compatible women and I laugh at my prior oneitis.
Here if you have any questions.

well i can only hope itll come back i guess

Where can I buy xl flavoured condoms? It's like they don't exist.

Same thing happened to my wife, went on the pill and was depressed within a week, no sex drive, no more smiles, huge anxiety problems.
Just be honest with your bf and say it like it is, that you went on the pill, it messed you up, you've asked other women and it's also messed them up.

How important to most women is penetrative sex in terms of keeping them interested? like we do everything else, oral, handjobs, fingering, lots of foreplay basically but I get into relationships with girls and sometimes I back away or get too timid when it comes to sex that stems from some personal trauma from my childhood. I'm currently working on overcoming that and getting more and more comfortable with my sexuality but it seems like they lose interest eventually because we don't have regular PIV sex. What should I do?

I broke my dick and can't have sex. And i'm a virgin. Should I give up on dating?

You're young still so trust me it gets better, I was 19 when I had my first girlfriend, I was a weak beta and kind of her 2nd choice from the getgo so obviously it didn't work out but I suffered a lot of heartbreak watching her date other guys and string me along at the same time and I didn't know any better so I let her do it to me.
Stay off social media or block her because having that temptation around is going to just make the healing process more painful and take longer.
Also for fucks sake this is not the final years of your youth, you're a dude you haven't even begun to peak, you have so much fun times ahead of you and plenty of time to meet girls and trust me the first time is the worst but it gets easier and easier after that. Just start trying to meet other women now, if you're persistent you'll find someone and when you do use your previous relationship as a learning experience to not make the same mistakes.
Once you meet someone else I guarantee you won't even give a shit about your ex anymore, trust me I've been there, it gets better, but you have to find positive things in your life to look forward to and work towards.

Literally how does doggy style (or any rear vaginal penetration) work?

Is my dick just too small?

I can sometimes get it in but after one or two pumps I slip back out.

I guess prone bone has worked but its summertime it gets uncomfortably warm having our bodies pressed against each other for too long

it has a lot to do with the angle of her vagina, some women's vaginas curve upwards making penetration more difficult, it's definitely not your dick size, have her get lower to the ground and spread her legs out further, it's one of those positions that takes a lot of trial and error.

5.5 incher here. How to please my gf better? Only ever made her cum twice doing all the work. Past girls were easy to please.

I don't know how to eat out proper either.

be vocal with her, communicate and ask her what's working and what doesn't. Are you getting her off mentally enough? A lot of women simply don't respond to solely phsyical stimulation, they need mental and emotional stimulation to get off, tie her hands and feet together, choke her and throw her onto the bed before you start fucking her, hold her hands down on the bed when you're in missionary or on top making out. A lot of women get off to that type of shit, I'd even be so bold as to say a majority do but they don't feel comfortable asking their partner for that.

bump

How can I rape girls without consequences?

So I'm tall and skinny, 6'1 and my gf is 5' and chubby. Most positions don't work for us, the only things we do are cowgirl, missionary and doggy. She cums really fast and I take much longer.

We can't try things due to her weight and height (I cannot lift her). On top of that, she has very little interest in foreplay. So most of our sessions last 20 minutes.

Suggestions?

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How do I get better at fingering girls? Like just in general, I feel like my fingers aren't long enough or something bc it takes forever to get them off, if at all.