Why do women like to awkwardly smile and make eye contact with you, even though you never really involve yourselves with them?
I never understood why women would do that. Or anyone for that matter, unless both parties are actively engaged and hanging out with each other. I know that in North America, it's both the norm and cultural expectations to be overtly smiley and cheery in demeanour, even though (as is especially the case for North American males) they feel the complete opposite inside. And I know that in the USA, at least traditionally, not doing so is a social faux pas, and potentially insulting. But to the rest of the world, that always makes them look dimwittied and derpy, and well worth the passive-aggressive stereotypes everyone pins onto them (I'm not kidding: a distinct chunk of American stereotypes and criticisms outside the world relates to this).
So it's just fucking creepy, and coming on too strong, when someone you don't know, aren't familiar with, and likely have never met, would even bother acknowledging your existence, unless you're both already doing something together (or might not know each other that well -- but have definintely met). Otherwise, it can be overbearing and, depending on context, *really* damn hostile and demeaning. And with women, or the very least the opposite sex, you also have mixed signals and communication errors thrown into the mix.
I just never understood that about them. Still don't.
Because my little autist, women are wired to make men approach unless they are totally outclassed in SMV
Kayden Allen
It's called being polite
Anthony Rodriguez
Not outside the US.
Blake Smith
Wearing rings around your neck to make yourself more attractive is a thing somewhere in Africa, that doesn't mean people in the US have to think it's attractive. Cultures have different ways of doing things, it's normal
Ryan Davis
Rings around your neck *to elongate your neck/stretch it out*
John Perry
>Cultures have different ways of doing things, it's normal Hence why considering *anything* as universally polite is ethnocentric (and downright racist).
Jonathan Turner
I'm pretty sure Canada does what we do
Jaxson Peterson
You're talking about North America and "the world", it makes sense that he would bring up an example about NA. He didn't say it was universally polite, you said that just now
Ethan Price
People make eye contact and smile as a basic gesture of courteous, non-verbal communication. They do it just to be nice and you're too autistic to understand.
He *implicitly* implied to be universally polite. It's right here in . And even to assert that notion by itself implies universality, even when, and especially, not specifically stated; which the notion alone is a common misconception (especially for Americans). Especially given the context of , who talked about this being a normal thing in North America, but the opposite from where OP is from (outside North America). And affirming it in the third paragraph, which is a common view held by many non-Americans, especially Europeans.
Joshua Baker
Again, that is not the case with non-Americans like OP. So to claim it as such is racist.
Chase Hernandez
People make eye contact and smile to be polite. We're not discussing a hidden tribe in the Amazon here, okay? Stop being obtuse.
Logan Perez
Are you trolling?
Evan Lewis
If it was obvious he meant it as a "universally polite" then it should have been obvious to ME that he meant it that way. When I first saw his reply I assumed he meant polite by USA standards, so it makes no sense that you would imply he said that
Ian Hall
>People make eye contact and smile to be polite. No they don't, American. I can tell you that over here, it's actually really rude and awkward. And to say that it's people do it for any means whatsoever is ethnocentric and racist.
Xavier Gomez
I think he may be trolling, yes
Joseph Foster
not to the extent you guys do, since we get emigrants from all over. I've always found it kind of creepy of you guys, desu.
Adam Butler
I'm genuinely not sure whether you're trolling or not right now. Are you fucking with me or are you actually being this purposefully dumb?
Luke Watson
Yeah, thats what it seems like. Either that or the most severe case of autism I've seen in a long time.
Tyler Watson
Are you? Because that's still the typical attitudes we always have about Americans, and one of the reasons we have these views about you. The cultural absolutism, the arrogance, the jingoism. It's why you guys are always so grating and ignorant about the world around you. Even small things like "smiling is polite" plays into that. And the fact you elected gingerbread president doesn't help.
Alexander Martinez
I'm not American.... Are you feeling alright, dude?
Logan Foster
And yet you still type, act, and argue like an American.
Benjamin Cooper
you guys ever thought that things are different outside your country? different cultures, different views. even here in canada, that remains constant. smiling is not polite and respectful throughout the rest of the world. its not even a universal anything. even in places like germany, smiling can be an insult if between strangers (even asking them 'wie geht es' will get you called out). in france, especially between men and women, its flirting. :/
Grayson Thompson
You are fucking brainlet, it's called putting forward a pro-social first impression. Please drink some bleach.
Gabriel Rodriguez
OFC, these are me, op is just an autist. I'm Canadian btw and when someone smiles at me it's polite to smile back, otherwise you do look rude. I also addressed that other cultures handle things differently, op just ignored that because all he wants to do is troll and argue
Jayden Parker
op is a product of cultures outside n. america, and made mention of that. you're just trying to assert your own cultural views. :/
Kevin Thompson
>I'm Canadian btw You're still among the same geopolitical and culture spectrum, so you're differences are meagre. But outside, into the rest of the world, your cultural values aren't universal or absolute; even small things like smiling, eye contact, and gestures of 'friendliness' is not only the opposite elsewhere. And claiming otherwise (ex.: "It's called being polite," "it's called putting forward a pro-social first impression," etc) is still ignorant and racist.
Jordan Watson
>I'm Canadian Maybe. But you guys are so close you're practically butt buddies. So your views on world cultures aren't going to be any better.
Lucas Taylor
I've heard that in some places it's not considered rude to stare at people, I think we can all agree that's pretty weird.
Christian Reyes
>didn't read my post You had one job. Sage
Adam Davis
Well, while we're just throwing baseless assumptions at people for the purpose of dismissing them without using our brains you type, act and argue like an autist. >you guys ever thought that things are different outside your country? So, instead of just needlessly expounding further and further for the purpose of being intentionally obtuse how about you or OP establish exactly where it is he's from, explain the local customs (apparently customs in which eye contact and smiling is not a form of greeting) and explain the context of these encounters. So far people have merely explained that smiling and eye contact is a common form of greeting and/or disarming strangers and you and OP have reeeee'd all over this entire thread, screaming AMERICAN at people and speaking in such vague generalities about how smiling and eye contact is rude in "some" places without ever really clarifying one way or another if OP actually lives in one of these fabled places.
This is also not including the fact that whether or not its a local custom or specific to a certain culture it certainly does hint at some kind of autism for OP to be completely unable of understanding social customs, whether it be abroad or in the place that he lives. I've been to places where the social cues were very different from my home land but I have the social intelligence to recognize that and not be as incredibly perplexed as OP is. Its one thing to dislike social custom and another thing to be so flat out incapable of understanding or adjusting to it.
Juan King
1/2 >So, instead of just needlessly expounding further and further for the purpose of being intentionally obtuse how about you or OP establish exactly where it is he's from, explain the local customs (apparently customs in which eye contact and smiling is not a form of greeting) and explain the context of these encounters. That's a racist thing to ask somebody. And it doesn't help you guys keep trying to institute policies were people have to be explicit about their heritages (ex.: Hispanics and Arabians).
>So far people have merely explained that smiling and eye contact is a common form of greeting and/or disarming strangers And that is wrong and ethnocentric.
>you and OP have reeeee'd all over this entire thread Ad hominem, American. Ad hominem.
>screaming AMERICAN at people Act like a racist American, get called out for being one.
>speaking in such vague generalities about how smiling and eye contact is rude in "some" places Because that is correct. Not what you consider correct where you're from.
>without ever really clarifying one way or another if OP actually lives in one of these fabled places. He already did in the OP. Even though, that's none of your business.
Hunter Phillips
2/2 >This is also not including the fact that whether or not its a local custom or specific to a certain culture But this isn't specific or local. Smiling being a pervasive and overbearing social cue isn't exclusive to a single culture; that's another racist assumption. In fact, North American views are among the exceptions.
>it certainly does hint at some kind of autism for OP to be completely unable of understanding social customs a). Ad hominem b). Ablism c). That's justifiable. Because they're having someone act in ways offensive to their culture. Which would also be racist.
>I've been to places where the social cues were very different from my home land Doesn't mean you're not racist. In fact, it might mean you're more racist than you've giving off.
>but I have the social intelligence to recognize that and not be as incredibly perplexed as OP is. Ethnocentricism.
>Its one thing to dislike social custom and another thing to be so flat out incapable of understanding or adjusting to it. It's also another thing to claim and assert that certain social cues are universal (i.e.: smiles being polite).
Xavier Cook
>Asking somebody where they're from is racist
Yeah, I'm done. I stopped reading right there.
Sebastian Wood
>And it doesn't help you guys keep trying to institute policies were people have to be explicit about their heritages I'm not an American. >And that is wrong and ethnocentric. Acknowledging the reality that smiling is a common form of greeting is wrong and ethnocentric? >Ad hominem, American. Ad hominem. I'm not an American. I've also never seen someone incorrectly accuse someone of using an ad hominem while using an ad hominem in the same sentence. >He already did in the OP. Even though, that's none of your business. You're seriously confusing me. What is the point in asking a question if the details necessary to answer this question are none of our business? Seriously, dude, are you trolling me right now?
Noah Sullivan
Same
Christian Anderson
Honestly so glad I wasn't born a Euro after reading this thread, you people are so fucking stupid. Please let the brown people mercy kill you after the ass raping, thanks.
Bentley Young
You are really fucking terrible at baiting man, please just stop and lurk more. You'll get it eventually.
Mason Torres
Argentinian-fag here, not all people does it but its not rude or awkward at all.
Brody Martin
>I never understood Because you don't have a grip on N. American cultural norms.
So where exactly did OP mention being from North America or fraternising with America women? Because I read this thread for the 6th time now, and OP for 11th, and I\m not seeing any mentions of such. Other than the second paragraph, but all that did was contrast how different cultures separately interpret cues from each other. Example, smiling and eye contact with non-friends and non-family is disrespectful in some places, here in Korea among others. Sometimes it's even hostile depending on where you are, and the circumstances preceding it. I don't see the problem with that other than cultural barriers. Specifically with , which was using their cultural views on cues and language to counter and debase the other. Something that I have to agree was racist and a personal attack. Which isn't helped by other posters trying to proclaim their cultural views, implicatingly American cultures specifically, as the standard for how an entire gender socialises with others despite where they come from. Even if it wasn't intentional, that's still conducting in an ignorant and bigoted manner. And is purely inaccurate, and passively slapping others in the face purely for not having the same enculturation as you. Not helped by the fact that the politics and leaders of a certain nation in the Americas has been increasingly isolating itself from the rest of the world this way. And this thread seems filled with those who put them in power. S=
