Why am I so bored and dissatisfied with my life? I feel like life is just fucking off into parts unknown and I'm wasting all my time. I felt like that ever since I realised that my Gymnasium years and the life I had as a foreigner in England are a blur and I don't remember anything. How is it possible that I don't remember 8.5 fucking years of my life? Now I'm sitting daily being sad about it all and I can't even afford booze or weed, since I'm a poorfag who blew his last money on KFC yesterday.
I'm 19, living in Eastern Europe. Fat, virgin, sad, kind of an asshole. No friends(no close friends, makes life not as good as it was when I had that one guy friend that I thought of as a brother). Now I finished high school here in Poland, I'm off to work soon to Spain, and I feel sad. I feel like I'm wasting time and I'm aware of that, but I can't change it. I work out, I try to eat healthy although that doesn't work out good. Reading is boring to me and I'm afraid I'm some moron. I'm afraid I won't get to uni and that I'm simply not as smart as I want to be. What do?
I even made tinder to get some experience with women and hopefully fuck someone and I realised I started to hate them even more because of the app. Now I just use it to fuck with people and take the piss out of girls. I promised myself I'd go to a hooker for my 19th birthday, I fucked the money off on fast food and some betting coupons I think. Mainly fast food. Yep
There are moments where I get so ambitious, but it's mainly daydreaming. Now it's making some business enterprise empire that'll make me successful, important and powerful. Or some cocaine empire like escobar. Stupid bullshit.
I have no desire to work out anymore after seeing that it doesn't bring any effects, I'm stuck on 55kg bench for almost 2 months. Nothing helps and I'm overweight, weighing 202 pounds at 5 feet 11 and 21/32 inches.
Coming back to my final exams, I managed to pass them rather well, but my advanced math went to shit and that's the main reason for me not feeling like I'm a smart person or someone who has the potential to be someone in life.
Because you have unrealistic expectations relative to the effort you are willing/able to put into your life as well as a general misunderstanding of every fundamental aspect of life.
Nathaniel Williams
Why?
I'm off to spain in two weeks, then uni, no point. I looked for even some illegal shit and I couldn't find anything.
Alright bud, here's some real advice for ya. You apparently hate women, at least slightly. I can almost guarantee you will not get laid with that mindset, you will be your own worst enemy here, even if you find a woman who wants to give you some attention. Seriously, even if you have to fake it, just pretend that you like and respect women, you might find that you actually do after you give it a shot. There's a ton and tons of absolute shit women out there, but there are some fucking amazing badass women too, if you treat them all as if they are the fucking awesome ones you might just happen to find one.
For all of the other problems - and I'm not sure of the legality in your area - try kratom. It is a drug that is legal in many places, though there are a few exceptions in Europe. It gives me drive to do shit and improve myself. I use it as a preworkout, focus at work, and to help with social situations. Ignore what you read online, it IS addictive, but that is basically the only downside. A lot of people will say withdrawals are no worse than caffiene, but for many people this is not true, it does suck quite a bit. But you can taper it down to get off when you need to. There is virtualy zero evidence that it seriously impacts health in any way. There's tons you can read about online, but let me know if you have any questions - if this is a serious option for you.
Aaron Jackson
I seem to hate how basic and generic all of them are. It just annoys me that one can't seem to have a decent conversation, or maybe I simply don't know too many women. Hell, I remembered a post I made on here regarding tinder bitches
"Same mate, I was told it'd be no problem to actually lose my virginity there, but the bitches are so fucking monotone. Here(Poland) all are art hoes with the occasional bot(someone literally used missalice's photos and made a fake profile). All these art hoes have the same thing in the bios, with the only difference being that some are fatter than others. I actually seem to get a lot of matches, but speaking to these sluts is a fucking nightmare. "
Kratom is interesting. It's monitored here in Poland or some bullshit. Where do you get this? Thanks very much, I'll look into it.
This user is pretty much spot on. You're a fat miserable asshole (by your own admission) but you're not willing to do much to change it. For example you stopped working out instead of trying to figure out why you weren't gaining strength. Maybe you needed to change your routine. Maybe you need to quit eating fast food. So many people come to adv wondering why their life is shit then you read their story and they have a shit mindset, shit self sabotaging habits and generally seem to want success and popularity to just fall into their lap. It's a shame that you're an asshole who hates reading because that shuts off two potential avenues for gaining some wisdom and perspective, namely other people and books. So some soul-searching user. You've created the situation you're in.
Jordan Howard
Sorry, not sure since you are in Poland. All of the sites I use to source it are US only. GL to ya
Charles Mitchell
I am willing to change it. I try to work out hard each time I go there. I admit to eating like shit because I treat food as some emotional pillow or something like that and I just like it too much. I tried to cut out bad shit out and I manage to get it going, but after some time it all goes back to the beginning.
I find reading the things I don't find interesting boring, the things I do like are rare and hard to find. I absorbed all the harry potter books I had at home in a few weeks, I love reading about some gangster boxer in a novel by one of my favourite Polish authors. But Dostoyevsky? Tolstoy? Fuck me that shit is boring.
How did I create my situation? I'm not disagreeing, I want you to explain to me.
There's this one other thing that's been bothering me. I happened to find that I enjoy feeling down. I don't know if it's getting used to my comfort zone or some other Stockholm syndrome bullshit, but I wonder if I could be all I want to be, as in accomplished, hard-working, ambitious etc., but still sad.
Thanks, I found some site on the internet which is kind of popular, I'll check it out.
It's a shame kratom is illegal in the UK, I'll be going there soon.
Please don't start drugs, I know a guy who was in a similar state like you and ended up getting hooked. Long story short he got the death penalty for killing his father while under the influence.
Most importantly get into a career. Not a job but a career. Even I have these grandiose daydreams that you do but I'm quite satisfied with my life as I have a proper career as an engineer.
>I happened to find that I enjoy feeling down This I can kinda relate to, not that I have any advice for you unfortunately. I do actually have some brain issues that lead to this anyway.
Joseph Reed
You are lost man. Tell me, what do you love?
Joshua Myers
I haven't I'll check it out, thanks. Honestly, books are a mystery for me. I don't like most of them but I remember reading an absolute monster of a book, called "Lalka" or "The Doll" in English I guess. In my book, it was 652 pages, but I loved every second of it. Robinson Crusoe I liked as well.
I often times read something, just to realise I don't understand a single word of what I've read, so I reread it and it's the same thing.
I'll look into other ways to make myself feel better, drugs will be a last resort.
I have an opportunity to study two things, and I don't know what to choose. Accounting or Law and Economics. I spoke with my mother and she said accounting isn't for me, since I'm rather chaotic in life. Even though I love order and sorting stuff out, I find myself to be too tired and drained to even clean my room nowadays. I'll be off to uni in October this year(hopefully). I'm leaning more towards accounting, though.
My father studied law here in Poland, but he dropped out during the third year, then I was born so he said fuck it. He said he'd want me to study law.
Feeling down is addictive, and honestly it's the only thing I know since I was 7 years old. Sure I didn't feel it or at least I don't think I felt it over the years, but I'm just not sure what happiness feels like anymore.
I don't know. The first thing that comes to my mind is I would love to achieve something in life. The problem is, I don't even know what to achieve or how to start.
If reading is boring, try audiobooks. If you are wasting time like on public transit, you can at least listen to a book or two. Pick up "Man and his symbols" by Carl Jung, it may help you get out of your rut. Uni isn't a good goal desu. It doesn't accept smart people anymore anyways, so you could get in.
I recommend you do some DIY. Build something or craft something. Go buy some clay and make something out of it. Then if it wasn't that fun, try something else.
What you lack is self-actualization. A typical activity for that is wall-climbing. Try to get higher.
