How do I get over my self-hatred?

How do I get over my self-hatred?

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ask yourself what habits lead you to hate yourself, and work out a solution to resolve it

if you can't even be bothered to do that, then your self-hatred has consumed you and you're lost -- no advice can recover someone at this stage. Don't let it get that bad

Therapy. Chances are if this were just some random mood thing that you could get over with positive thinking you wouldn't be where you are right now. Get therapy. It'll help.

Why do you need to get over it? There's nothing wrong with hating yourself.

I hate myself all the time, but it doesn't bother me any because fuck me, and my opinions, I don't play with that shit. If I wasn't me, I'd bust both my fucking knee caps, but I am, so me lives for now.

Half work in solving any problem is the ability to put correct question. Yours is not good. You will never come to a really successive result. It's only an imitation.

I use self hatred as a fuel to oppress my weaknesses.

My past, present and future all trigger intense sense of self-loathing.
If only there were a couple things I hated, but my brain can produce reasons to hate myself seemingly every second.

How? My rumination gets so bad I can't even focus on TV.
I only find relief in daydreaming about not being myself.

I'm in Eastern Europe so psychs are obviously decades behind the West in terms of both techniques and quality.

i struggle with self-hate too user - if it's ok for me to ask, why do you hate yourself that much?

I think it's partially irrational, but I hate pretty much everything about myself.
My looks, personality, eccentric behavior, fearful and sensitive nature, short height, skinny fat body, being poor, lack of a work ethic, social skills or any meaningful social experiences, the list goes on...

I'm a 20-year-old virgin and have zero friends, mostly because it's difficult to connect with people when you're afraid to be yourself and ashamed of your entire being.
I fit the diagnostic criteria for avoidant personality disorder.

i'm sorry user i share a lot of those things too but you can't run away from yourself forever
what i've done and others have done to me in the past has made me sensitive and secluded
but if you dont do anything else to fix it for yourself you will be miserable forever and i don't want that for either of us
try to use that hatred for yourself as a fuel for change, get outside go on walks try and attend meetups
i'm sure it must be hard in eastern europe but surely there will be some place with people that you can connect with

As OP, I have the similar problem, and just as OP, I'm am Eastern EU, but my biggest concern is money. Like 4 occasions a month could burn third of my salary. And I'm not sure this is something I want to save money on.

Other than that, I feel like I should keep it as a secret. I don't anyone know about this because I fear they will think I'm a freak and, well, have mental problems.

And I've never met someone who was like yeah, I was total depressed but therapy helped me. It kinda just feels like a person you can talk to but not your friend. I really don't see that getting some advice could change how I look on myself and how I behave.

Being around others only exacerbates my self-hatred even more.
How do you connect with others when you're terrified of them seeing the "real" you?
"Hey, I'm user. I spend 20 hours a day sleeping and the rest wishing I was dead."
I can't relate to the average person that has a life so rich in experience I can't even imagine it.

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Lies. I’ve been in therapy for 2 years now. Wanna kill myself even more.

How come?

I don’t like the world or myself. I don’t want to contribute to society. I regret everything I’ve ever done.

Okay, but, I mean how did therapy make that feeling worse? Does your therapist know about that you are not making progress? Etc.

Yes, the problem is there’s no getting around certain things no matter how much you try to reframe it.

I think she knows, but eh, I dunno. Therapy is a bit of an addiction at this point.

Why do you hate yourself?

you can connect with people with different lives, they wont hate you for it but i can see the self-hatred in the way will make it difficult to talk to them
so if you cant do that why not find friends similar to yourself?
i'm unfulfilled too so i understand how you might feel

Yeah. Your example makes me scared of it even more.

I feel sorry for you, user. I hope one day you'll get better.

Thanks. I don’t think it possible, but thanks.

I'm just a shit person I can't think of a single thing I don't hate about myself, other than being slightly above average in intelligence (which has done fuck all for me).

I have one online friend that's similar to me and it's been a struggle opening up even to him.
It's hard to find people like me in real life, unless I visit a mental hospital maybe.

Honestly, other people won't "fix" me. Even if someone gave me a gf and a group of friends, at the end of the day I'd still be me and that's the problem.

>I'm just a shit person
So instead of fix yourself, you gonna end it? Cmmon, fight for the life you want

Don’t listen to this. People only want you to improve so it’s easier to exploit you.

Maybe some people are just too broken to be fixed.
Any effort I put in feels like polishing a turd.

The life I want is impossible as long as I am who I am.
Part of the reason I hate myself is exactly because I'm not a "fighter".

How the hell do you undo 20 years of bad habits and coping mechanisms?
With shitloads of expensive therapy and drugs?
Google search "AvPD success story", there's zero results.
Radical transformations aren't realistic, at least not at my stage.

what's the problem with being you? you may hate yourself but even if you liked yourself you'd be the same base person, no?
i understand why you'd struggle to change your situation because i really can't find any way to make myself feel better about self-hatred either, but the fact that you posted you want to stop hating yourself is at least a sign you want some change in your life
you can still be you and love yourself, but you need to at least change a little in your behavior in order to do this
i don't know how though, so my advice is a little hollow, sorry
best of luck though

If I liked myself unconditionally (like some people can), then it wouldn't matter that I was a shit person.
Maybe I'd stop being so anxious, maybe I could finally be myself without feeling bad and ashamed of who I am.
This would ironically finally enable me to change for the better, because I wouldn't be drowning in negative emotion all day because of guilt.
At least that was my whole theory.

I think is right and I don't even know the correct question.