Hey peeps, my dad had a stroke a couple months back, he's good now but still in recovery

hey peeps, my dad had a stroke a couple months back, he's good now but still in recovery.
I'll keep it short and to the point.
I have tons of goals and plans in my life, all of them involve leaving my country, travelling the world, becoming a musician, experiencing shit etc etc.
none of that involves me staying physically close to my parents or relatives.
is it morally right to pursue my goals and dreams or would it be right to stay here with my dad? (he is kinda pressuring me).
obviously I wanna go and pursue all of my goals and when I've "made it" I wanna include my dad and get him to see what I worked to make, but so far it's all dreams and reality is I'm just a kid who's still in his homecountry.
I hope this makes sense.
>pic unrelated

Attached: kek.png (899x895, 1.81M)

Well, what is your life situation? Is it only you and your dad? I'd say as long your mom or siblings are around and can take care of him, go.

nah, he has family and people that take care of him, but me and him are like best friends so I'm probably the only person he can relate to the most.
I don't live with him, I live in another town because my uni is here.
I have another year I wanna spend here to catch up with exams (extra year), even then I pmost likely won't be getting my diploma next year, but I'll be able to do it in the future if I ever decide to, but next summer is when I want to move out of the country and go do my shit.
sorry if I'm not making much sense, my english is taking a shit right now

I'm just struggling with morals here, should I give my life to satisfy my dad's need to have him close or should I put my life and goals first and then bring my dad in on the action
this is the tl;dr version of my issue

to have me close*

Desu I would consider a bunch of things
>how old is your dad
>how bad/good is his health
>how relatable are his other family members
If you know he will be safe and sound, then you shouldn't feel too guilty about leaving. Just keep in touch with him, call often and skype and what not

>how old is my dad
64
>how bad/good is his health
well, considering the massive stroke he had, I'd say pretty good, biggest issue is his hand still being paralyzed, but apart from that he's walking again, he's talking again, his brain is operating a 100% capacity.
>how relatable are his other family members
not that much, like, they care about him and they're all close to him but obviously he doesn't feel the same way about them as he does with me, his son.

I'm in the same moral dilemma as you. My dreams and goals are in another country, but my parents are here and they don't have much people that could take care of them aside of each other. I wish I could just say fuck it and just get on with my life, but I keep feeling guilty for that wish, and my parents REALLY want me to stay.

Anyway, the rationalizations I've come up for this dilemma are: when they die I'll be left completely alone and my ambitions won't have been met and I'll be completely miserable. They would want me to be happy, as they say, and doing this is what would make me happy. I can't be a slave to the past; I've gotta look out for myself as they did. Both paths can be full of regret, but one is fuller than the other. At least with the internet and shit I could talk to them whenever I wanted, in the past people who emigrated didn't have that luxury.

Etc, etc
In spite of all of that, I still feel guilty, but what can you do.

He'll probably be dead soon so you could just stick around and wait it out

what the fuck mane

it's clear that OP has no sense of loyalty or he wouldn't even have to think about it. But great, if you need to go climb mountains in Nepal or fuck sluts in Korea, that's definitely more important then staying closer to home and funding a way to pursue your goals while fulfilling your obligations. Yes. Your obligations. You are obliged to do the right thing.

That was the whole point in my message. You're acting like it's an inconvenience. That's the undercurrent I'm picking up here "hurry up and die so I can go do drugs in Barcelona". He's your fucking blood and you're just going to leave him when he's in bad shape?

Unless you're his caretaker, it's fine. Because of planes, the only difference between you living a city away and you living on the other side of the planet is money and a few hours.

> t. Was in the Peace Corps, worked for 2 NGOs in Africa and Asia, finishing degree in foreign policy

> all that fucking projection
You're a loser, kid.

A father would want his son to pursue his dreams and make it in life rather than stay behind and worry. Go and make him proud, m8. Just call often.

Go overdose on MDMA on a fag cruise while your dad has another stroke, winner

I'm not the OP. I'm calling you a loser because you put off your life and plans, and tell others to do the same. Pathetic.

There's a lot more to just "fucking sluts in Korea," and if you think that's all their is then it's clear you're uneducated and haven't been out of your own town much.

You're not picking up any undercurrent, that's purely your projection. When your parents are middle aged, stroke or no stroke, you don't know if they're going to die in the next year, or after 40 years. You're telling him to wait and put his life off.

OP, one thing I will say is, it might be worth staying close while your father is still in recovery. But once he's good, I recommend going out and seizing life.

There are plenty of opportunities right here. So I didn't miss out on anything. I still traveled while my sister was able to help but no I didn't go tour Europe with my shitty band that nobody cared about while my mom sat at home dying. Priorities. Hanging out with strangers or being with people who love you. Hope karma meets you all in 40 years and you're faggot son leaves to go do drag in Lagos while you're a quadriplegic

You're a moron. The OP's father isn't dying. Obviously don't leave your dying relatives.

And now it's obvious you're projecting. It's forgivable that you project your painful experience with your mother, and you obviously did the right thing, staying by her. But you did miss out on a lot in life, and you don't even know it because you rationalize away living life. But it's clear you're bitter about it.

Also, nobody does drag in Lagos because West Africa is an intensely anti-gay region. You'd know that if you bothered to learn anything about the planet you live on.

In 40 years faggotry will likely be accepted in Lagos.

Oh, I'm sure you said all that stuff because you're an absolute expert on Nigeria. Tell me more, please.

I would go.
There is not a lot you can do to help him, and you can fly back without much notice.
I don't live near my parents, but I call them once a week where we usually talk for an hour or so. I travel to see them and they travel to see me. Obviously your father can't travel if he is dying, but you can do the visiting, maybe even ask them to sponsor some of the tickets so it isn't ruining you.

If your dad is sick and asking for your help, help him. Can't you do parts of your goals later or when he is stable?

>hey peeps, my dad had a broke a couple months back
wot

Murder him, making it look like a natural death, and go follow your dreams.