I fucked up last night and this morning. This girl I've been seeing shes 18, I'm 21. I stayed the night at her place last night, we watched some movies. We winded up kissing and I went to go lay in her bed with her (we were originally on the couch). Anyway we cuddled in bed and I winded up fondling her, she told me to knock it off once but didn't say anything after that one time. We fell asleep for about 2 hours. I get up and go back on the couch and wake up around 7am after her mom leaves and we go and cuddle in bed again. I decided to fondle her more and she told me to knock it off again. She also wanted me to get out of the room so she could change. But I just sat in the bed like an idiot and expected her to lay back down. She told me I was lucky I'm so cute. Then she took her dog out of the room to take him potty. Anyway 15 mins later she hasnt showed back up so I send her a snap. And she replies with another snap saying I made her feel really uncomfortable. I immediately walk out of her room shes on the couch covered up. I tell her I'm really sorry and I pack up my stuff and drive home. When I got home I immediately messaged her trying to apologize. We went back in forth on snap admitting I'm a fuckup/fuckboy (I'm not). Anyway she calms down and we send normal snaps back and forth for a while till she fell asleep, I told her I really wanna make it up to her because I do have genuine feelings. But she doesnt trust me anymore. I offered to take her to the waterpark on a date. I only found out after we started going back and forth that she is a rape victim. I feel like utter shit. I really like this girl and I dont wanna let her go. What should I do? I'm literally thinking about popping up with flowers and apologizing in a dogeza stance on her front porch.
I fucked up last night and this morning. This girl I've been seeing shes 18, I'm 21...
Uh no you do not do that shit. You find another girl and busy yourself. Communicate that making her uncomfortable wasn't your intention and leave it that. She'll get over it, then you let her contact you.
You better be memeing. Let me give you some pointers:
>you told her you should've "respected her wishes"
>you told her you "have feelings for her"
>you apologized
>you told her to hit you and that you deserve it
>you apologized a second time
>you called yourself a piece of shit
Never do any of these again, especially apologizing. She thinks you're an absolute beta and has lost all interest in you. The best thing you can do is move on and hope she doesn't spread word around that you're a beta.
doormat beta
Jesus you're gonna hit your late 20's and realize how much of a loser you were. Similar situation happened to me when I was 22. She was in MY BED and refused to get dirty. Just wanted to lay there I guess. Fuck that. At the time I just played guitar like a beta. Never let a girl waste your time like that. If she doesn't even want to fool around, take it as a sign that she doesn't want you. No, she doesn't like to take it slow. She was in bed with you. It's your job to push it further and hers to rebuff you if she's not feeling it. But after that you should NOT put up with that shit.
Text her right now "youre fucking boring anyway" and get rid of her number.
1. You sound like a absolute beta so you fucked up already 2. I honestly would show up to her house and apologize, saying if I knew you have been raped I would have understanded more I'm sorry, if your not comfortable with me anymore that's fine just know I'm here for you if you need anything
Try not being a piece of shit next time.
>I'm literally thinking about popping up with flowers and apologizing in a dogeza stance on her front porch.
This ^
Op, you did nothing wrong. Don’t let that bitch control you and make you pander to her. It’s obvious that you weren’t trying to make her feel uncomfortable. Ignore her when she pulls this shit, but if she doesn’t stop then drop her ass.
>Fondling someone multiple times after they've explicitly told you to stop isn't wrong
Throw yourself off a cliff.
OP are you here 'cause I'm not gonna bother giving you the actual advice you need if you're not.
Still here, trying my best to patch things up with her.
Alright, cool.
Everyone here calling you a beta has never, ever dealt with a victim of abuse before. If you really like this girl, you will NEED patience, and you will need to be a fucking boulder that she can lean on. You fucked up by not abiding by her wishes for you to stop, but you're trying to fix it so you're doing all you can, there. If you can get back in her graces, (provided you like her enough to do so), you will need to strike a fine balance between assertiveness and knowing when to back off. Do NOT self-deprecate any more than you have. Be clear that you did not mean to make her uncomfortable, and that you're sorry. Don't call yourself a piece of shit, none of that because then you're making it about you when it's about her dealing with her abuse.
If you land that makeup date with her, have a good time and make her feel safe without being a doormat. Suggest the use of a safeword for any sort of advances of touching that she can use so you can stop immediately.
>Fondle girl
>She tells you to stop
>Fondle her next day even though she said no day before
>She tells you to stop
>Tells you to get out of the room while she changes
>You don't
Dude what the fuck is your problem?
Ditto. Fondling someone multiple times after they've explicit told you no to is wrong as fuck and everyone like you should not exist anymore. Thx.
Grabby hands? Take her to the “water park” for some “water sports”?
Besides amputating your touchy touchy hands leave her tf alone and move on.
This is bad advice and you should feel like a retard
This nigga. She made it clear your advances weren't welcome (at least, not yet) and that she wasn't that comfortable around you (again, not yet).
Staying the night at her place has some obvious implications, but if she tells you to simmer down and you don't, repeatedly, don't be fucking surprised when she doesn't trust you.
You've pretty much already burned this bridge, she can only associate the feeling of insecurity with you.
I mean, damn OP, if she said once, that's all it takes. If she said in a joking tone and tried to kiss you or something, that would be one thing, but she clearly wasn't feeling it. I don't know if you'll ever be able to repair that sort of damage, desu.
You were invited to her house to spend the night. You did nothing wrong. This girl is just another example of a crazy bitch with too much self entitlement i.e. Modern Women. Did she think you just wanted to be her board game buddy?
you are apparently cute so im not helping you fuckface
Unrelated but semirelated
Girl who dug me from childhood (unbeknownst to me) confessed to me and then wanted me to pop her cherry all of a sudden, very quickly we were getting quite physical
Went too fast for me so I got up and started playing guitar because I couldn't get it up, didn't seem morally right so my dick wouldn't go with it
She seemed a bit understanding, I think she was frustrated about not being able to date or something, so she just asked me to lick her minge so I obliged, tasted awful
Now she's dating some decent looking (as in morally) fella and they look happy
I'm happy with my guitar man, dated a bit but doesn't seem right my dick ends it quickly, hopefully I find "the one" sometime
Are you the guy who plays wonderwall at parties?
Even after the mess ups with the unwelcome fondling and refusing to leave her room when she asked you to (wtf), you were still in there. What cemented you in the creep zone is when you started apologizing profusely, flogging yourself and likely failing to drop the issue. Your behavior planted the creep seed in her head most definitely but the "you're lucky you're cute" was basically her saying "You've fucked up but you still have a chance if you play your cards right". You didn't play your cards right. You went full beta and watered the creep seed with your overapologizing.
>apologizes
>leaves
>apologizes again via social media (why? you should have dropped the issue and pulled back after the first one, she would have come to you)
>admits to being a fuckboy (at this point you've confirmed her suspicions)
>starts acting like a complete beta and groveling at her feet (more apologies, more supplicating, ...)
And now she doesn't want anything to do with you. Honestly the best thing you can do at this point is never contact her again. If she does get in contact with you, don't apologize for that night again. Just be normal and don't be so pushy next time. There's a fine line between being assertive/aggressive and a molester with no self control
ooh here's a novel idea..try being her FRIEND before you make her a fuck buddy.
Well you are a tard. I would call you a retard but that might require a few more iq points that you don't have.
He'll just end up in the friend zone and be forced to watch as she falls into Tyrone's arms and gets willingly dp'ed at a party.
You did nothing wrong. Every girl I ever knew who claimed to be a rape victim was crazy. Bail.
You did fine. Stop being so fucking apologetic. And no flowers, for God's sake. Just slowly keep at it, it's normal for women to freak out a bit and feel reluctant. Don't apologise for being a man.
She's a head case. Gtfo.
>I'm literally thinking about popping up with flowers and apologizing in a dogeza stance on her front porch.
DO THIS OP!
she will love it im sure
This is the only good piece of advice in the thread. Especially
> If she does get in contact with you, don't apologize for that night again. Just be normal and don't be so pushy next time. There's a fine line between being assertive/aggressive and a molester with no self control
Just rape her again I guess. Not like you can ruin her more...
this is the worst piece of advice i have ever seen. i was in a similar situation with someone 1.5 years ago. i was dating someone else, but this guy was my best friend, so even though i told him not to touch me, he did anyway, and i began to resent him for it. after some time passed and i broke up with the other guy, we started dating and i forgave him because he showed genuine disdain for his past actions. we're married now