Advice on fuckboy

Posted in the wrong board but if that post gets deleted here is the context.
Me and my girlfriend have been together for almost 4 years, and a 32 year old ex military fuck boy writes her Snapchat in her notebook. Naturally I wouldn’t want someone doing that, I don’t mind if they talk but he admitted to flirting because she was “flirting” back. She told me she was just being nice to him, he looks and talks like a guy who’s a F-boy. What do?

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Me and her have been together for to long for her to just cheat on me, and she would never do that in the first place, she didn’t ask for any way to contact him he wrote it in her notebook

Why is she more concerned with being nice to him and not caring that she's disrespecting you? The guy is right, wtf is she doing? And where did he come from? Was she friends with him before you two met? If so, did they fuck or were they childhood friends?

If she doesn't block him I'd be weary. I never insist she does block them, I say she can do what she wants, but her actions will have an impact on the relationship.

I really don't think that's a good sign in a 4 year relationship.

No she was just being nice, she was literally just talking to him and he came on to her really strong, no she didn’t even add him or nothing, she doesn’t use Snapchat or any of the mainstream stuff only kik

It’s someone she goes to college with in her math class, she just talked to him then he wrote in her notebook without her knowing but she didn’t care because she’s in a relationship. He was coming on to her not the other way around, she was just being polite talking back. She didn’t add him on anything. I just don’t know what I should

She can stop him cold if she stops talking back to him since she knows he's pursing her. I get being nice and responding at first but she should shut this own.

Anyway saying she was just being nice is an excuse and bullshit lie. If it wasn't a lie she would say he came on too strong and I know what he wants now and blocking him. I feel foolish because I responded thinking nothing other than being polite.

After being together this long she shouldn't be playing these games with you.

>He was coming on to her not the other way around, she was just being polite talking back.
That’s a load of shit. If she had any respect for you she’d ignore him and you wouldn’t be in this situation. It’s a lame excuse girls use. When you hit on a girl and she has a bf, she ignores you. When she engages she’s dtf. That’s my experience. Your relationship isn’t as good as you think. You found out because you saw the writing in her notebook, but I bet this isn’t the first time it’s happened.

I found out because she told me, I didn’t find out myself, she told me some guy wrote in my notebook and gave me his Snapchat

She did ignore him completely, I just don’t want him to engage any further because she goes to college with him. She has no interest in the guy because she didn’t ask for any way to contact him, she was just being nice talking to him. People now a days confuse being nice with flirting 100% of the time, that’s why most people get friend zoned. Out of the 4 years that we’ve dated we’ve never had trouble telling each other our feelings, I know some relationships go bad but trust me she is completely devoted to me. She’s shy and submissive so she’s not confrontational.

Update on the matter
My girlfriend appreciated me talking to him about it, being authoritative about it showing that she is mine and only mine but she can do as she pleases. I.e. talk to anyone she wants, but he shouldn’t do the flirting out of respect for us being a couple. She’s a little embarrassed about it since she has to go to college with him but it will subside, i’m Glad I got my point across with him. He didn’t text back but he got my texts so he can stew in his own emotions, i’m not gonna involve myself in such petty drama. I’ll shut his shit down real fast, it’s not worth getting in a fight over, but if he’s not going to respect me or her then he can leave the college or we’ll ask the college to take action. I trust her and she trusts me, she finds him creepy but is shy to tell him off.

Lol you're going to ask the college to "take action" against a guy flirting with your girlfriend? God you're dumb.

No, not with the flirting. If he comes on to her anymore even though she says to stop. Sexual Harassment, if you had a girlfriend or a daughter and some guy was coming into them, you tell them to stop and they still do wouldnt you do the same thing?

So what did the dude do wrong exactly? From his perspective he's just trying to hit it off with a cute girl from his college class, that's not a fucking crime. How's he's supposed to know she's in a serious relationship? Has he backed off now that he found out? If he has, I don't see the problem. Quit overeating, it makes you look weak.

might have been an over reaction but if he does continue that’s what the result will be. If he doesn’t respect another persons wishes he doesn’t even deserve a fair fight. That’s the extreme case, not to worried about it as he now knows there’s no chance for him to be with her. Thank you for the advice, a bit harsh but thank you

This is your prize thank you
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>Guy making moves on your girl is sexual harassment.
Boi, this is the type of thing that you settle man to man. You don't get the college involved if you have any dignity.

The guy doesn't know you and is not compelled to respect your relationship especially when your gf acts as if she is single when you aren't around. He hasn't done a damn thing but make overtures and your gf continues to respond.

Just know that you will not be able to control every man that will speak to her nor will you be able to control who she likes and wants to get to know better. She is more than capable of telling him to back off but she doesn't want that to happen and now she'll be embarrassed you showed your ass. All that will happen is she will be more careful, knowing you are monitoring her social media.

>though she says to stop
She hasn't told him to stop. Only you have, thats not sexual harassment.

OP doesn't want to fight the guy knowing he'll get his ass beat.

That's my point. If you want to defend your lady you have to actually do it. Getting someone else to do it doesn't count.

I might lose but i’ll Still defend her no matter what. I’ll avoid fights if I have to because in the end both sides look like asses. This is the first time anything like this has happened. I’m not monitoring her at all, she can talk to anyone she chose to tell me about the Snapchat thing because she respects my feelings and our relationship. She could have just not told me and I wouldn’t know about it, but she cared enough to tell me.

I don’t mind fighting I really don’t, it’s just in the end it’s really not worth it. If you think getting into a fight can solve any problem then it’s sad, it’s better to just resolve it before it gets out of hands

I don’t thing a lot of you understand she hasn’t said anything to the guy except talking to him In class to be polite

I told him, he can talk to her all he wants, but no flirting. That’s it, i’m Not saying avoid her or any other shit, just talk like normal human beings. Only idiots go in guns blazing without thinking about the situation, i’m Not gonna fight some idiot just because of some words. You really gonna fight someone putting your job on the line, the other guy can over react and break your arm or kill you and you’ll say “atleast I fought for her”. Well you’re dead, fighting should be the last thing you do

I was born and raised in Florida, standing your ground was the first thing that was taught, but only when you need to. It’s better to solve things before they get worse. I wouldn’t care if I sound like a pussy for that, no one wants to see anyone get hurt because someone got their feelings hurt, as much as I wanna hurt the guy it’s just not logical. I admit I overreacted but I wanted to stand my ground show some fucking balls for once instead of being the nice guy. Fighting someone over some petty highschool drama type shit is the same way of thinking why people that think like that are already in the wrong

This white dude is huge, 99% chance i’d Lose but if I have to I will. I wouldn’t back down if I reall had to. That’s a promise,

But she contacted him?

Seems like she wants the dick desu.

No she talked back out of being polite, he wrote in her notebook, she didn’t care. She told me about him writing in her note book. I took offense. Told him off on Snapchat