Why is it so hard to get a girlfriend? I just want someone to cuddle with

If you're attractive then the women will make it obvious they like you, then if you get to know them and actually like them, you win, if not then you move onto another one.

If you're average or below average looking then you gotta put in the work and make yourself look more fuckable, get an interesting hobby that will make girls want to be a part of that world, dress well and pretty much go out of your comfort zone to be a better, more appealing version of yourself even though you may initially dislike it.

I'm the 2nd kind myself sadly so I lost the lottery and need to work on myself more to be where others are by default. I'll let you know if it gets me anywhere but apparently that's meant to work in theory

If you live in a western country then this video will explain it
youtube.com/watch?v=FsaieZt5vjk

This

>Well, no,the problem goes deeper than that. Why can't you get a gf? What makes you so underisable?
I honestly don't know, never got any female attention in my life.
I'm in the 2nd kind also. Any ideas for interesting hobbies?

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>Any ideas for interesting hobbies?
Whenever I hang out with my friend and his gf is around, she seems to like the fact that I play guitar and pretty much other string instruments, I also paint/draw which seems to be interesting and its always something to talk about. I make my own music as well which my friends are also interested in hearing. Pretty much do things to be that friend people have that they talk about when the topic comes up, like "I've a friend that plays in a band" or something like that if you get me? sports are good too, body building, travelling, reading etc

this.
you were born during the fall, OP. best just ride it out and hope it hits before you're too old to compete in the wake of it.

didn't watch it but lol let me guess it's mommy's fault that you can't get a gf

Ignore that user, Spengler was a proto-Nazi.

Can you Jews not get so butthurt and admit you fucked up?

In other words, women are attracted to normie shit?

>There is no solution to this problem except
being a higher class male; FTFY.

If you can't compete maybe you weren't met to share your genes, famalamadingdong. Survival of the fittest and all that.

>Survival of the fittest and all that.
So then I guess mass shooters are just culling off the weaker specimens then?

I'd disagree; a firearm is a tool and we're talking about the spreading of strong genes to the next generation through reproduction and not the slaughter of hapless individuals.

The only genes mass shooters are spreading come dripping out of their ass if they ever make it to prison.

I'm attractive but I trained myself to avoid any kind of romantic entanglement for reasons, so I'm sad, lonely, lacking in confidence, and almost unthinkingly brush aside women when they are interested. What do you suggest?

Be worthy of a girlfriend, seriously, be someone a girl would want. Have a job, don't be a dick, be fun, have goals, acomplishes, hobbies, passions you get the point.

>I'm attractive
>I'm sad, lonely, lacking in confidence, and almost unthinkingly brush aside women when they are interested
This is an oxymoron

Pic related: Visual aid for the retards of Jow Forums

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Become a better version of yourself and romantic partners will follow. Don't go chasing girls, it could potentially make you look desperate and doesn't work most of the time.

Worst part is even if you get ones attention they will just monkey branch eventually. Social media is primarily whats destroying society. When there is a practically endless supply of men women can be whores without consequence.

it's a meme and you've heard it a thousand times...

but it's confidence. it really is. i swear, just be more confident in yourself or at least appear it, be more assertive and you will attract people.

it helps to have a job, though. like a lot

gfs are bad news man. I broke up with mine and I couldn't be happier

If you're ugly, and by ugly I mean anything short of stunningly handsome, including average looking, or slightly too short, or even a minor blemish on your face, then the fact is that no woman will ever love you. Why do I say "if"? I know you're ugly. If you weren't ugly, you wouldn't be alone. Ugly men might as well be walking corpses as far as women are concerned. Women won't just ignore you, they will proactively reject you, and make sure you and everyone else knows that you are unworthy of ever being loved. Deluded ugly men will sometimes tell you that you can win a woman through displays of confidence or wealth, but the fact is that any woman you manage to bed will simply use your social status or wealth to fund her lifestyle while cheating on you with physically attractive men. Other deluded ugly men will tell you that bodybuilding or facial plastic surgery will win you a woman. They are even more mistaken than the others. You can't fake genetic health, no matter how many tens of thousands of dollars you pour into protein powder or surgeon's scalpels. Everything a woman will ever need to know about you she can learn instantly by glancing at your face for less than a second. You've been judged unworthy, and excluded from the fold, and your genes will never take part in the future of humanity. The sooner you accept that, and move on, the better. You're alone, in a much more profound sense than you even realize, and you will die alone. In a way, you're dead already. My advice is to try to seek fulfillment elsewhere, like in a hobby or religious practice. Your life was a lost cause from the beginning as far as women are concerned. You might as well never have existed as far as the reproductive game is concerned.

My problem is I don't know how to get out there and meet a girl. Do I cold approach? I know if I have a set up where I can meet someone I will succeed. I'm good with people, I know I can do it, the path just isn't clear to me.

You need to realise that the mutual interest has to go both ways. Just like how you want a girlfriend that's cute, and wants to cuddle with you, that same girlfriend also wants a dude who's good looking, has his life in order and is nice. You need to find what it is you're lacking on work on that, and it's impossible considering you didn't say anything about yourself and we don't know your personal life. Anything will just be an assumption.

I don't get it. I have a nice job, I'm not a dick, sometimes I'm funny and I have been going to the gym for the last year and still no gf for me. Should I pick up hobbies I don't like just to get girls interested in me?
Could you elaborate in the better version of yourself part?

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>Next, they need to know you’re interested.
How about how to know when a girl's interested? I have a lower chance of rejection if she's got a foot in the door.

Sup incel? Go back to Jow Forums and come back once you learn how to respect women. Maybe you'll get laid then, virgin loser.

>that same girlfriend also wants a dude who's good looking, has his life in order and is nice
I'm generally nice, but not good looking. I don't know what having my life in order means, I have a job and some savings.

Hey guys. I've been dabbling with different dating sites. Match and PoF aren't really working out for me. I thought about eHarmony, is it worth it? I've been able to hook up through Tinder and Bumble, but they aren't the girls i'm looking for. Please if anyone has any experience tell me.

Meeting people can be sped up but not rushed, you have to just get on with enjoying life and it's not predictable when you'll meet someone. Then after you meet them it's the same thing for getting it to the next stage.

Billions of people get into relationships but the initial build up time exists for pretty much everything.

Girlfriends want it to be hard so people can be desperate for them.
Then girlfriends can pick from the best and use the rest for attention.

How many girls like you as friends, are you best friends with any of them? (like "I'll tell you anything and you can talk about anything" terms). If the answer is none then solve that one before trying to get them to like you as more than friends.

Never had a female friend. How do you get one?

It shouldn't be necessary to answer this. Do you have male friends? That's how

Same way you used to get friends in general, when you are a bit older (like 18+) people tend to like opposite sex friends more because they are more fun. Backing up even further just in case... have you had friends before?

Go on a few dating sites and hit up a few girls, open with something light and funny, talk for a bit, get her number, then set up a date. Doing this in person isn't hard either.
Don't listen to this faggot, he doesn't know what he's talking about, women want romance and closeness, but timing is important.

To be honest I don't have a clue how to get a male friend either. I have a few friends from high school but I don't remember how we became friends.

Yeah examine and do that one first, you can do the romantic relationship thing a year or two later. What you're doing is trying to jump too far ahead which wont work, it's like trying to go on a cave diving adventure when you can't swim and live in a desert.

>thread turns into a 'woman are all vapid' blanket statements
everytime

OP are you getting turned down a lot or are you not asking?

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Society expects you to make the first move, a gril won't fall in your lap. You have to go out there and ask. You've heard the meme before that dating is a numbers game, and it's completely true.

Most people I know irl who are "tfw no gf" never actually ask anyone, or they hyper-fixate on one for months, orbit her forever and eventually ask her out to dinner while trying their damndest to hide the fact that they have romantic intentions. Maybe this isn't you, but I suspect it is.

You just have to keep asking around until you find someone willing to go on several dates eith you and then bam, GF.

Listen to me, I'm no Chad but I have three dates lined up in the next couple of weeks. If you're not batting out of your league, girls are more likely to tell you "yes" than "no". And when they do tell you "no", you gotta dust yourself off and move along.

You have to be assertive--and I don't mean some PUA meme shit about how every women wants to be dominated all the time by every random dude, I just mean you gotta reach out for what you want and roll the die until it lands on six.

Let me add, because I was a social retard and used to think this, that what I'm describing isn't playing around. No one sane expects you to be monogamous on the first date. Dates aren't a commitment, they exist for the two of you to figure out if you want to be with each other.

It's a pain in the ass to be a dude in the dating scene because you have to make all the moves and carry all the risk of rejection. Ot sucks, but that's life. It's a good idea to grow a little calloused about first dates and not put any stock in them. Just be pleasantly surprised when one goes well.

There are apps for finding people to cuddle with.

>Most people I know irl who are "tfw no gf" never actually ask anyone, or they hyper-fixate on one for months, orbit her forever and eventually ask her out to dinner while trying their damndest to hide the fact that they have romantic intentions
Not him, but that hits too close to home

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I speak of this man because I used to be this man
When you realize your errors you can correct them.

>Most people I know irl who are "tfw no gf" never actually ask anyone, or they hyper-fixate on one for months
So I guess the fact that I've been extremely active in playing the field, asking girls out and still have no gf to show for it after a year means my situation is more dire than I realized...

Women dont need any of that. There is not magic divine rule saying I have to be the one appealing to women rather than being appealed to by women.

Thats bullshit. There are many men like that who repel women, and many men opposite that who get plenty of women.

This man speaks truth. Listen to him

Because you're ugly.
That's literally it, no joke. Just accept this truth and you can stop worrying about it so much.

How often do you get a positive response? How do you ask them? How do they turn you down?

Appraise yourself and try to be as objective as possible; and I don't mean shit on yourself, because you have SOMETHING going for you, I promise. How is your life situation? How do you dress/take care of your hair? Are you fun to be around? Are you in shape? What kind of car do you drive?

Are you batting out of your league? If so, the world isn't over. You can either aim lower or improve yourself. 90% of anything appearance related is presentation--I'm not shitting you, I know a dude with a lazy eye and a deformed leg and he's a fucking CHAD. He's a personal trainer and looks fucking great because he cultivated his appearance. A decent car is more accessible than you think it is. So is making decent money. Give me specifics and I'll do my best to Hitch you from my armchair because I only started figuring this shit out about a year ago and I've managed to turn my situation around.

How do you meet girls?

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>So I guess the fact that I've been extremely active in playing the field

What does that mean? Asking a different stranger out each week on campus, for example, will quickly make you develop a reputation. Also, the cold approach has a HUGE margin of rejections.

What are you usually doing?

I'm not that guy, but just saying: What do you do during the week? Do you sit at home reading or do you go out to do stuff?

In my free time I lift and then sit at home watching anime/playing vidya.

>In my free time I lift and then sit at home watching anime/playing vidya.

That's the funny thing about lifting. It might make you look better, but if you don't get some hobby outside the house, it's as useful as watching anime when it comes to meeting people.

I'll give you a goal: Go out at least once a week to do something with other people. Classes, getting drinks, volunteer work, anime cons, tabletop roleplaying group, whatever. Go do something and talk to someone there. That's all. Let's see if your chances improve.

Thanks for the advice user, I'll do it if I can overcome my anxiety.

Go to events. I meet girls in line for concerts, at concerts, at cons, at free yoga classes downtown, at an aerial silk class, etc. Apps like Tinder and shit also work if you don't mind wading through a thousand dropped convos to get a date and if you know to ask quickly

And this is the reason why the west has a low birthrate and why immigrants are needed.

For all Jow Forums
Don't cry about 'muh whiterace' if you gave dumb animals like women rights. It's your fault.

How do you get friends?

Maybe it's becuase the collective mind speaks the truth...

What is this fucking spider language

That was all one sentence...

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Those things require me to leave my apartment. Hard pass.

You could try offering free yoga classes and concerts in your apartment. No way that might sound weird.

Honestly, 96% true. While I disagree, there have been, are, and will be, plenty of unattractive dudes who have won over the hearts and bodies of women, this doesn't happen NEARLY as often as good looking men simply being rewarded for looking good. It really is a lost cause unless you have insane confidence, and at least one or two redeeming traits that far outweigh your bad traits. For example, I work with a dude who's shorter than me, overweight, and isn't the best looking dude on the planet, but he has a cute gf and has had plenty of experience with women. The guy has light skin, blue eyes, and has an incredible personality, and is an artist, and women enjoy that about him. Even the ones that look put-off by his appearance like him. Why? Because he's a cool guy who also happens to have physical traits women like, even though he has plenty that outweigh them. He also probably has a big dick, which is most likely the source of his confidence, but women aren't able to just "sense" that shit. It isn't a meme when people say you should do things for yourself, so get out there and work out, hopefully find a hobby or a fulfilling job, and completely forget about ever being a woman, or interacting with a woman outside of a work setting unless you're absolutely forced to.

Bumping for this.

I'm batting in my league (overweight women) and I still get rejected all the time.

Have you tried overweight, ugly women?

Aren't they already ugly enough?

We need to go uglier!

I'd rather be alone than end up like my Dad.

>I'm not a dick

There's your problem

>Billions of people get into relationships
>then there is me who can't do it
I wish I could just live on without wanting a gf

What you want is purely materialistic OP. You should know by now that the joy received in a intimate relationship goes beyond just spooning ever once in a while.

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Why Asians tho ?

Why make them be interested into you when you know they like you already because of your personality just ask a plastic roasty out

Its hard for you to get a girlfriend because thats the only thing on your mind.

It's the only goal of my life so I think it's natural to think about it a lot.

Women aren't stupid, they know when guys are interested, and they decide quickly if they're gonna reciprocate or not.

This honestly.

OP, by all means, get some fun hobbies, work out, get more friends, get a better job. Do whatever. But don't do it for women. In this little perfect world, women appreciate this shit. In reality, most women just want to date a good looking guy who acts like their dad. I'm being serious. What most people advise you to do to get girls sounds good on paper, but in reality, women look at you and respond emotionally, they're not attracted to "logical" things like muh car or muh hobbies or muh interesting conversation. They will, of course, say you have all these things when you date them, but that's just because they're admiring your positive qualities after they emotionally decided on their desire to sleep with you.

>why is it so hard
supply and demand
every guy wants a cute girl
every girl wants a thrill guy
you do the math and figure out most girls aren't cute and most guys aren't thrill

incels.me

has the answer to any question related to girlfriends

I know so many losers with gfs, granted the gfs are also losers.

Tom?

>This is an oxymoron
Why? I'm bad enough with other people when romance isn't complicating things. Trying to talk to girls with any romantic intent makes me want to give up on life, so I don't do it. Ignore their signals of interest to spare myself the frustration

Rofl uggos on suicide watch

Joie?

Wait really?

>tfw never approached a woman in my whole life and nonetheless currently one year into my second relationship at age 20

Gotta be lucky I guess

Because women have all the cards. I've known 5/10s who are constantly dodging phonecalls and texts from guys.

False.

t. manlet with cute gf who fell into my lap with almost 0 effort

>why don't I have gf when I watch anime and play Vidya all day, why won't girls knock on my door and suck my cock
lmao