Go on a date with a girl I met on tinder

>go on a date with a girl I met on tinder
>we go to a pub and have 2 beers each and talk all this time
>she's very intelligent, qt as hell and actually has some personality (she jokes around and doesn't have a stick up her ass)
>after those two beers I suggest we go and grab some tea and cake at a cafe I wanted to go to but when we arrive it turns out it's closed because it's late
>I walk her back home
>on the way I suggest some idea about late night break-in into a zoo (I like trespassing desu) and in a joking manner suggest we could do it now
>she's actually up for it and we go there and do it, and it's fun actually
>walk her back home
>hugs
>when I arrive to my place I text her suggesting we should pay a visit to that cafe some time later
>"yeah! and find more places to break into :)"
Alright that was yesterday. How do I not fuck it up from here?

I always seem to screw things up somehow but this time I really don't want to. She's a catch. I'm totally fine with taking things slowly with her because she really seems worth it. What do I do now? Text her? If so, what do I text her and when? When do I suggest a next hang out? What could we do? What could we talk about?

I'm a complete moron when it comes to relationships.

Attached: 1478992834019.jpg (322x322, 13K)

Are you going to ask us what to do every step of the relationship?

Is she dating you or us?

I just want the first few steps to get her hooked.

Though yeah probably I'll make more threads as it progressess. If it progressess.

I'm a total autist and every single time I tried to do things without assistance it ended badly.

Does this matter really? I thought this is an advice board, not r9k

Follow your gut. You said you still wanted to go for coffee so message her in a day or two and ask if she wants to go for coffee. Being a borg with no mind of your own doing what a bunch of people on an Inuit seal skinning forum who have never even gotta a first date is not the correct thing to do.

Let's say that I give you a week's worth of great ideas to wow a girl and you hit it off.

How is she going to respond a month later when she realizes that you put on your best face to wow her and then run out of steam when she's in the bag? She's going to turn against you and get bitter about men.

Just because you're the one asking for advice doesn't mean I can't help the person you're dating instead of you.

Because, what would I answer if she made a thread a month later saying she found that some guy on the Internet told her ex how to wow her and that she's hurt that her ex would do that to her?

My gut never works too well. I'm either too clingy or not interested enough. I just never know how to act.

I mean yeah I want to go for coffee with her but do I talk to her about it today? Or tomorrow? When should I go?

I think it'd be fine. I suppose I'm looking for advice in order to be sorta taught how to deal with that stuff. Later on when we become more comfortable with each other it'll get easier hopefully. I just don't want to fuck up the first few steps.

I honestly do not understand your post, user. Maybe I'm too exhausted but I can't see your point.

A. you are overthinking everything. Stop focusing on trying to do the right thing because there is no right thing. Do what (You) want to do If what you want to do is what she wants to do then congrats you found a good match.

B. You never will get comfortable with her if you are constantly trying to act a certain way that is not you.

OK. You seem like a good guy worth my time.

My advice is to act in a way that you can sustain for years at a time.

Don't want to seem too clingy because you're hungry for pussy all the time? Wait a predetermined time.

When should you ask her for coffee? At most, let a day pass. If she seems really into it, ask her the same day.

When texting her, wait between 30 seconds and 1 minute, randomized, after you've finished typing before hitting send.

Grab a coffee, go for walks in the park, find things in common that both YOU and her want to do together, find out more about her and talk about stuff you have in common.

Most importantly, don't set her expectations so high that you can't follow through on it in the long-term.

Oh, and while trying to make her happy, enjoy yourself. That matters to her, too.

>A. you are overthinking everything. Stop focusing on trying to do the right thing because there is no right thing. Do what (You) want to do If what you want to do is what she wants to do then congrats you found a good match.
user, if've tried that with multiple girls now and it just didn't exactly work out. I've noticed that there are people who can go on one date and then somehow end up in a relationship whereas I could date many women and not one would want anything more with me, even if I could take them to bed easily.

I just suck at the dating game. Trusting my gut doesn't work so I'm asking others on what to do. Hopefully I'll learn how to act and somehow avoid making the same mistakes which I can't even identify at this point.

>B. You never will get comfortable with her if you are constantly trying to act a certain way that is not you.
Not true. I've gotten comfortable with multiple women before, it's just that... I suppose they didn't get comfortable with me. They met other guys and preferred them somehow. Even if we were "dating". I don't know how to explain this better but I'm certain that if I make it through the first steps, it'll be alright.

>Don't want to seem too clingy because you're hungry for pussy all the time? Wait a predetermined time.
But I'm not clingy because I want her pussy. I actually want something more than just that. I do get overattached too quickly though. And if I wait some time without talking to her, she'll assume I'm not interested and to be honest waiting without talking might even come off as passive agressive or just fake.

>When should you ask her for coffee? At most, let a day pass. If she seems really into it, ask her the same day.
So is a day later okay? I can't even do it today (i.e. the next day after our date) because I have other things at hand, including sleeping off the previous day.

I want her to be comfortable around me really. Previous girls I've dated would straight up admit they found a guy they just felt more comfortable around. I don't even know how to explain it. I have somewhat a bipolar personality where I can either be relatively calm and pretty much a hikkikomori and on the other hand I can be extremely energetic, jokey and all. And I think this may be putting off some girls because they might like one part of me but not enjoy the other. I suppose by training myself somehow and just keeping my shit together I could get a girl to like me but I just don't know how to do it.

Another thing is... I don't know how often to text a girl. Especially after our first date. And what do I text her? "How was your day?". Like I said previously, it's either me texting too often and coming off as too interested (which I legitimately am in this girl and I never understood why is that actually a bad thing...) or not interested at all in which case she finds another guy who can commit more time to talking to her and meeting her (I have a job and other stuff and I really don't have all that much time to talk to girls).

Anyone else?

Try asking her what she likes to do, and just exchange suggestions. It should be a good start.

What about talking? Do people who begin dating talk every day? What do you talk about?

Will it be lame to just text her how is her day the next day after a date? Will it not display too much interest on my part and come off as fake?

Just text about random things, I don't like texting too, if you want to talk just ask her out for a walk in the park

We're both busy people so the chances we find time to just randomly hop out to a park are rather low. And the weather is kinda shit too.

I suppose the question is - do we have to text CONSTANTLY? I'm honestly not the most talkative person and I hate just talking for the reason of talking

Texting all the time with her always might be bad, she would get annoyed if she doesn't like that, but texting like that from time to time is best solution, when you cant meet always ask how she is doing but try doing that in not obvious way

Do I text her all day? Or is exchanging just a few messages a day okay? And should I do it every day? Or could I just text her randomly and leave gaps spanning a day or two?

I'd honestly prefer if she was the one to initiate because I'd at least know she's interested in conversating with me. Plus I'd prefer regular phone conversation over texting because jesus christ I fucking hate texting.

Say that to her that you don't like texting, problem will be solved, and see if conversation starts when texting

What about the other questions?

Exchanging some texts during the day would be enough, try not leaving gaps, it seems normal like that, if she continues texting a lot, don't drop it off

How about initiating it? Do I initiate every day? Or just drop it off if she doesn't initiate?

Dont be annoying, and initiate randomly during the day, asking if she got time then or then to meet up, I really suck at texting too so I can't help a lot

Hey, thanks for the advice, user.

No problem dude, I hope for the best for you