Have no social skills

Yes, you pretend long enough it just becomes instinct. Why do you think acting fags get girls, cause they pretend to not be their gay ass selves. and if they can do it, you can do it.

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I feel the same way. I usually just end it as soon as possible but that's no way to make friends.

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This is all everyday small talk, you won't get laid either way so don't fret.

Ask ‘em to send over a worker who’se ready to work.

>this might be something you need to discuss with a professional
i've seen a couple of counselors/psychologists before
both pretty much told me i need to try talking to people more

but it's hard when
1. there aren't that many people i can talk to in any given day
2. i don't know what to say or how to continue conversations. it's always
>>how was your day/weekend
>it was good, how was yours
>>mine was good

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That is some Dale Carnegie shit. Thanks user.

>Yeah, I know how that is
> Yeah, I think there's a bug going around
> Yeah, it's been too hot to get any sleep lately

They're just looking for affirmation and sympathy.

if only I had such opportunities, I'd be already fucking her. Just talk to her goddamnit, ask her "are you sleeping wrong?" or something like that

>lol
Thanks for the lol I having a time without that

Eh this is how I am but I don't see it as a problem. Why would you want to know stupid information about some dumb fuck you're probably never going to see again?

Offer to buy her a drink to relieve her headache. If it doesn't work, I've heard orgasm is also a good way to relieve headaches.

Maybe an A grade rimjob will energize you?

Simply react to what they say.
The I'm tired could be a way to ask her if it has been a long day.
If you know what kind of events it is most likely for her to have been to lately, ask her if she went to that.

Eg
>I am so tired...
>>Long day?
>No, it is just one of those days
>>We're you at the concert last night?
>No
>>Okay, I heard it was good, I didn't have a chance to go either.
>...
>>There is another concert next week, I was planning to go alone, but if you want to join me, that would be great.
>No, fuck off you creep
>>AM I DETAINED?
>You still have to pay
>>AM I DETAINED?
Sir, come back.
>>AM I DETAINED?
>>AM I DETAINED?

Thanks

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Be creative. not every response has to be a the most logical response. this is also a key factor in something called "humor".

sucks man. not everyone can do it. thats all I have to say.

>"Yeah? You should take a nap inone of the dressing rooms"
Just casual comic/cynical remarks with a smile.

>>cute girl salesperson: "how's your day"
>>me: it's good, how's yours?
>>girl: i'm so tired right now. i don't know what it is, but i'm tired
>>me: yeah...
>what am i supposed to say in this situation?
Say "it's because you're lazy. Work harder wage slave. Chop chop!"

>>i feel sick
You have a weak immune system because of your inferior genetics
>>i have a headache
You're dehydrated because you didn't get your hourly BLOWJOB CUM you slut.

Just improv

reply with canned responses then take control of the conversation with a question.
>tired
oh shit that sucks did you get enough sleep last night?
>headache
get some ibuprofen, have you had anything to drink today?
>sick
thats terrible, are you going to go home and pump yourself full of DayQuil?

afterwards follow up with asking my name and introducing yourself,
>hey by the way my name is user, what's yours?

then exit the situation and ask them out
>hey I got to go but you're pretty cool, we gotta hang out sometime, can I get your number?

then text them when you're about to do something and ask if they want to tag along
>me and my buddy are going to head out to a show at wherever do you want to kick it tonight I can pick you up?

desu I think girls are just poor conversationalist and guys have to, often, pick up the slack. I wouldn't fault you for just saying "ok" in response there, bu if you wanna score some pussy you're gonna have to be slicker than that but overall smalltalk just fucking blows.

I usually try to get out of smalltalk and into banter or some sort of playful humor, but when provided with dead ends like that it's difficult.

>Just talk to her goddamnit, ask her "are you sleeping wrong?"
kek, despite being a goober he's right. just put it out there and don't think too long about it

This, what you actually say isn't that important, what's important is if it allows the conversation to keep going or not.
And if you wanna get to know someone you want the conversation going as long as possible.

just be yourself

Thanks

Thanks
But don't think I can introduce myself.. she was just being nice

>and my buddy
I have no friends, and spend most of my time indoors
What other kind of things can I invite her to?

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>how was your day/weekend
>it was good, how was yours
>mine was good. What did you get up to?
>oh I did x and y and then z
Ask questions about those if you can, but remember that a lot of people literally like to talk, and if you ask them open questions, then they will basically lead the conversation for you. I really struggle as well, which is hard because I have kids and I have to go to birthday parties, so I usually spend the first hour or more anxiously eating snacks, corralling children, etc just so I don't have to chat when I get there. Just practice, and remember that a good chunk of what's awkward about conversations is when you can't find an opportunity to make thr other person speak, so that's where you 1. Listen and 2. Ask questions.

>i'm so tired right now. i don't know what it is, but i'm tired
>"maybe it's because you put too much effort in your work. It's actually the first time a saleperson asks me how was my day."
or
>"yeah, me too, work/studies are killing me".

you can, you can introduce yourself. dude just ask girls out it's not very difficult, literally be like "you look like a professional bowler we should go bowling sometime"
don't be scared

Try watching some romantic films, study how the actors respond to each other. There are also Ted talks and advice clips on youtube. Best advice is to go to public places (bars, nightclubs, hobby groups etc) and practice. You will make loads of mistakes at first, but you will learn from them. Also consider that the girl may be feeling the same insecurity as you, so be kind.

>i'm tired/sleepy
>i feel sick
>i have a headache
Too bad. I was gonna ask you for a date. Never mind then.

I wouldn't care much. She has to deal with it just as anyone else has.

Thanks

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Not asking her to pick out undies for you...

Idk dude tell her "yeah, the weather's hot" or something.

Thanks

Thanks for the suggestions, though I feel I can't come up with anything in the moment

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thanks

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>Best advice is to go to public places (bars, nightclubs, hobby groups etc) and practice.
this scares me tbqh, especially bars/clubs because i'd be a lone and everyone else will be with their friends.

i don't think interrupting a group's conversation with my awkwardness will go well

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name?

>let me find someone that can help you

O-okay

>me: yeah...
*snap*

Small talk is basically just talking about random stuff. It doesn't have to be exciting, just not too heavy, like your mom having cancer or whatever. Its not about the content and meaning of what you say, its about just vibing and having fun.
So what you need to do:
Lower the standards you have for the words coming out of your mouth.
Because you seem fairly autistic, you might get some pretty weirded out reactions, because you can't calibrate socially yet. So you need to do work on it and talk to more people. Try to small talk with cashiers or random people at the store, people handing out flyers, bars etc. Yes even if they don't seem all that friendly, you actually never know how people are gonna react before you talk to them, you gotta find it out on your own.

>i don't think interrupting a group's conversation with my awkwardness will go well
To worse you are at something the more you have to fail before getting good at it.

Pull subjects to talk about from the situation.
eg: do you think this shirt fits me well?

Dont forgot about the others. I mean, if they really want to talk, they would ask questions, or something more open. Here its just a closed phrase.
I just think those guys want to be polite and have a minimum of conversation to look asocial but I don't think they are really open to any long conversation

When they ask "how's your day", they mean "Do you need help finding anything, or can I go back to slacking off?"

Thanks

Str8 up my guy, I had the same problem.
Then I got a book recommended on here, having like 10 fucking minute long convos with randos about random shit.
Here's the book my guy, I'd give it multiple reads desu, this shit fucking works wonders.
Pic related

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thanks, will check it out

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That chick looks like my ex basically. Right in the feels.

This

Not OP but I had a similar problem:
>talking with a colleague about how people often get his name wrong
>mention that the name x is more popular and sounds very much like his
>He says x was his brothers name who died during his childhood so he doesn't like when people mention it.

The fuck was I supposed to reply to that?

Isn't it obvious? You just say something like "Oh damn, I'm sorry to hear that dude."

People like having their emotions acknowledged, that's why people have friends in the first place

He is, dumbass. That's the problem

Let me tell you something OP

Girls are fucking whores and they upset that they have to take the dick like a fucking bitch in heat

This

Maybe she just wanted someone to complain to.
But obviously she wants to have a conversation, when she is not giving the usual fine(although it isn't, but would lead to uncomfy convo) answer.

The best thing is if you are creative.
The basic thing is just to give some reaction and if possible create an interesting question or topic out of the given words.
Possibility: Talk about this ergonomic matteress add, you have seen, it should improve sleep.
Or just ask further to maybe find out, that she is for excample often working for some school to late in the night.

But don't try to come up with something to hard.
If nothing comes to you, just ask deeper, like "Are you sure you don't know? It must have some reason right"

If you really are not coming up with anything, the best thing is to just hold up the conversation. I think jumping off topic, wouldn't even hurt that much in a conversation. Rather jump to whatever comnes to your mind, than crushing your mind and the conversation with the perfect anwer.
Especially with woman, the vibe means more, than the content.
If you say something stupid you can just laugh with her about it.

>tfw gained acceptable social skills, but no friends

Thanks

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