What's Jow Forums stance on proactive girls who initiate stuff with guys by for example texting first...

So... you are basically saying guys who have had positive experience with girls asking them out... are involuntary ceilbates?

You sound insecure.

Kek

generally speaking, if you are subjectively less attractive, regardless of gender, you can expect that you will need to be comparatively more forward than someone who is more attractive. That's just a variation on Price's Law.

The risk a girl has when actively/openly pursuing a guy is that it takes time to determine certain character traits of a guy that would otherwise rule them out as a partner. Pursuing them too soon or too obviously may not allow them to realise their nature.

>He doesn't want to be with a girl he knows for sure is sincerely into him and woud rather go for the one who's sticking around a bit because she found his pick-up line somewhat entertaining.

I feel like the girls who do this usually have something wrong with them. It's still flattering and likely to work though.

Can confirm, although I always wanted a gf who has something wrong with her, since I'm not normal either, so it works.

Almost certain to work.

I think the only reason girls don't do this is because they're afraid of rejection.

No. I'm responding to OP's question and giving an answer through the lense of a presumptive girl. A guys thirst for women is magnitudes above a girls. There is no reason to NOT take advantage of that. I called people incles in here because half of the responses are "I wish a girl would approach me hurrhurr".

My first kiss was with a girl who asked me out.
It was nice. I don't see what's wrong with it.
The only negative thing I could see happening is that he thinks you're playing a joke or trying to trick him.

>play stupid games with a guy you like
>he figures out you're just a bitch playing games
>gets annoyed and stops messaging you

Vs

>ask guy out
>go on date
>be happy

I fucking tried this shit. Nope. Told a guy I had fun meeting him and would love to catch up again... and he ghosted me. Took me days to work up the courage to actually even say it and bam. 10/10 will not do again. We had been talking for a while too.

Welcome to a man's world where you have to deal with ghosting and rejection. You're still probably 100x more likely to get results by being straightforward than dancing around about it.

Can't really lose on that. If the guy is normal and thinks you're attractive, you got him. Then there are less assertive guys who would have never asked you out but will since you initiated, got them too. And if you happen to fail then other more assertive guys will take note that you're looking for a guy and will initiate with you. Win win win.

Yeah he probably just didn't want to be with you and it has nothing to do with the fact you asked him out. As in, if you hadn't asked him out he would have not had romantic feelings for you anyway.
Still, ghosting is a shitty, cowardly thing to do, sorry for you.

This is not true and is more reflective of you than anything else. And you know that it is more likely the girl not messaging than the guy. Stop playing roleplay, user.

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Idk man. It was my birthday when we met and he ended up coming home with me (very mutual decision mind you). We talked a lot, he was really lovely and seeeeeeeeemed very into me (like the way he would absentmindedly run his hand down my back sort of shit).
Males confuse me sometimes. So frustrating

I have a passive, almost servile, personality. If they approach me then that'd make me happy since I don't want to bug people, but if she shows interest first then I'll do so as well since I'll know she isn't just talking to me since she doesn't want to be rude

I hope you realize that if there's a random guy you're into then there are probably other girls that are into him to. He doesn't have to pursue someone who doesn't show any strong interest. If a girl isn't responsive enough, a guy might figure she's just playing games, and ghost her and pursue some other chick.

Jesus, what is with women on adv thinking that they're the only girl in the world and can have a relationship with any guy they want?

Heh, some people do unexplainable weird shit sometimes. Sucks but his decision most likely didn't have anything to do with the fact you said you wanted to catch up again.

>Males confuse me sometimes.
KEK try females.

>KEK try females.
good point... sorry ha

Lmao I don't know why you're throwing these random ass examples and pretending that somehow women aren't in control(most of the time). Obviously, people who act too hard to get will end up alone and die, but that isn't what I'm talking about. It is probably the third time I'm saying this but the dynamic is skewed towards women over men. I am making the suggestion based on that observation that would be most advantageous to OP. You don't have go follow what I tell you.

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It's 1 am sorry for the typos but you get it :^)

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I guess we can agree that people in general are confusing.

I'm glad we could reach a compromise :)

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you will be severly disappointed later when you expect a man to behave like a man but instead youll find a manchild with a fragile ego and youll be wondering why

its because you took on his role and switching back is difficult plus behaving like a woman is easier and more comfortable

so no do not directly approach a guy, if he cannot take the most obvious hints he is not worth it because he is a mangina

What is the suggestion? Don't ask a guy you like out and let him know you like him? Instead lay low and hope he'll ask you out one day? How does that help?

The dynamic isn't skewed towards women. It goes Attractive Man > Attractive Woman > Ugly woman > Ugly Man. Most women are attracted to attractive men with good looks and good jobs, who do have plenty of options, and also plenty of reasons to be picky since they don't want to end up with a gold digging hoe, get raped by a court and lose all his shit.

If you like a good natured dork, then you can play games with him and he'd still cling on to you, but then you could just ask him out and he'd pounce on it anyways.

Why are you acting just like the other guy? At least you're attacking my idea so I'll bite. Though you are right in absolute terms of the groups, you are overwhelmingly wrong in terms of the totals between the groups. How many "attractive men" are there compared to "attractive women"? Look at the distributions of online dating sites when asked about attractiveness between men and women. You see how mens are well distributed(kinda) and women's are skewed? It's because men find women more attractive than women find men attractive. That is just straight data, not suggestions like the ones in this thread. The dynamic is skewed towards women. Rich, handsome, tall men are obviously a top choice for women as some short big tits blue eyes blondie would be for a guy(or whatever niche it is). But ask yourself how many guys settle vs women? It's not to say that it is not messed up that statistically women view men with more inferiority, but it is a fact that has to be settled with and a dynamic that won't change here on Jow Forums and most likely not in the future. My suggestion is to be aware of and to take advantage of this fact.

This is my last post tonight, maybe I'll look at the thread in the morning. Let's be friendly :)

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To expand on this:

A woman uses sex to get a relationship. A guy uses a relationship to get sex. An attractive guy can generally get sex pretty easily. He has no need to offer a relationship (time, money, exclusivity, etc.) to anyone unless he feels they are exceptional. An attractive women, or an ugly woman, both can get sex whenever they want, though ugly women might have to go after ugly guys. But for women, a relationship is more psychologically beneficial than random sex. But in order to get a relationship with an attractive guy, they have to also be able to offer more than just sex. They need to actually have a good personality and a connection with the attractive guy. If they fail to actually attract him, they'll be relegated to the humiliating role of side bitch. Though some girls have no self esteem and don't mind. Or they convince themselves that sleeping with a large number of random guys is some sort of measure of desirability and something to be proud of. You might get a guy to play your game to get into your pants, it doesn't mean he thinks you're special.

>Ugly woman > Ugly Man

I disagree with this. An ugly man can make himself attractive to girls by working out, having money, being very confident, having social skills, dressing well, etc.
An ugly woman is just fucked she will never be attractive.

>Attractive Man > Attractive Woman > Ugly woman > Ugly Man
Wrong.

Wrong again.

This happened to me maybe 5times this year alone and I'm expected to keep going because I'm a man and women won't do shit

Ugly woman can get plastic surgery

I feel its nice when women are forward. Shows genuine interest and things go much faster if that happens and the guy is interested.

Depends. How old are you OP?
How old is the guy?

Every girl I've dated or been in a relationship but one chased me and every girl that chased me turned out to be shit. You know why? They are into the chase and once they have you they are off to chase another and another and another guy while in a relationship with you.

Its flattering to have a pretty girl chase you but make no mistake, it doesn't mean you are special, just her next target.

Women who feel like there’s a strict guideline that says men have to always intiate shit are idiots

If she approaches me first I’ll love her forever.

Most guys (except alpha pussy slayers) will feel flattered to be approached.
Basically doubles your chances to get with a guy that you're interested in.
But since girls making the first move doesn't happen much, many guys will also be deer-in-headlights kind of shocked and passive or even think you're trying to fool him, so you have to not get discouraged if that's the case.
Happened to me once years ago, when a total qt3.14 hit on me in fist class of the college semeser once and I fucking froze and didn't even ask for her number.
She got discouraged and I'm kicking ever since myself.
Also this

Guys love when girls approach them first. Unfortunately this barely happens in todays society because 99,9% of girls think that their cunt is some kind of holy grail eventho she has red flags left n right.

>woman interested in my life
something must be terribly wrong

but she approaches every guy until one says yes

Ugly man can't?

I NEED YOUR GUYS ADSVICE NOW

On what?

The whole thing is stupid.
Under "traditional" norms, the guy asks the girl out, but she also needs to say yes.
If she says no, the guy gives up and tries somewhere else.
Since there is not an infinite amount of girls, a guy needs to be wise about who to ask out, so he picks the woman who is most likely to say yes.
Over the thousands of years, we have developed so many ways to let someone know that things are going well.
Most of them are not verbal.

Now, reading these signs can be hard and recently, we allowed autistic people to control the narrative. So now you need verbal and written consent to even ask the question.
As nobody knows what the fuck it means anymore, some guys chose to think that no woman is sending the signals that they want to be asked.
Some chose to think that all women wants to be asked.
Both are wrong.

So yes, asking a guy out is fine, just as it is fine to ask a guy if he wants to fuck.
It is the strongest signal you can send that you want him to ask you.
You can also try some more subtle ones if you want. Making him think it was his idea is the best manipulation.
But asking him directly is also fine.

All girls I've been with are like this, that's why I'm single now, haven't found one in a while. I'm just not very dominant, unless I have to be.

Sorry Girl, but i may have bad News.
I see here almost everyone saying that is good when a Girl Approachs a guy.
But know, every guy that say so, is a beta fag and someone you will not be attracted too.
Nature made the man a hunter and gave woman the power to choose which men is going to breed her.
If you want a healthy relationship, then you must be Approach!
Your Job is to look good and sexy and the right men will come to you.
If you are beautiful enough a good looking guy will come, if you are fat... well you must be sutisfied with lesser man.
The better you look the better man will Approach you.

Playing games is for teenagers and faggots. If you want something go for it

Dude you are so blatantly an incel with 0 life experience who's been listening to a couple pick up artists misusing concepts from evolutionary psychology it's hilarious. Get out of your mom's basement buddy.

>responding to a delirious shitposter who cant even follow basic grammar

well their pussy is some Kind of holy grail bc nature wants it so.
This is Evolution. imagine you being a woman, you will carry your mens seed and no other men will want to help you doing that. What if your men is not strong enough or a pussy or, or, or... A female has to choose very good who is she going to have sex with. She wants the best man for her and the kid(s) to survive.
So now you understand why Girls are so picky, bc nature, Evolution wants it this way.
Today we have condoms, pills and so on. A Girl will not get pregnant if she doesn't want to.
So Girls doesn't Need to be so picky anymore.
Well this is not how things work in Evolution. We lived thousend of years under the above circumstances, our Body and mind will not Change bc of 60 years of condoms and pills...
Woman unconscious still Need to be picky.
Maybe in 10.000 years woman will no more feel the unconscious Need to be picky and everything will be easier for us to have fun.

>Some chose to think that all women wants to be asked.
ok and wants wrong with that? If you like a Girl, go ask her. If she doesn't want to go out with you, she is going to Show you that.
Why choose to ask only the ones that will likely say yes? bc you are afraid of rejection.
So no Need to be afraid of rejection. Go out and ask every Girl you like out.

Girls just Need to look beautiful for good man to Approach them.
There is no Need for a Girl to Approach.

He's kinda right though. Like I'd love it if a girl was proactive with me, buy I'm also evidently not the kind of guy girls want to be proactive with.

Well I've had girls be proactive with me and I loved it.
So much for the "only unattractive beta would like that", huh?

Why do you capitalize random letters? It gives me anxiety and triggers my autism

Well the only perspective I have is my own, and as much as I'd like it I'm not exactly a 10/10, so based on my singular data point it's all I can really conclude. But if you say otherwise then I'm not in a position to disagree.

It’s slutty but I’m always horny so it’s cool

It'd be pretty stupid to base a claim that broad on your very limited experience.

OP here. I'm 25, he is 23. I see guys saying that girls approaching guys is generally a good thing, but does that apply to less attractive girls too? I feel like every guy would love to be asked out by a 10/10 bubbly cheerleader beauty, but most guys wouldn't want to be approached by a 4/10 girl (who is either fat or has butterface or strange posture, or strange way of being, or skin condition)...

I'm average at best, and the guy I'm interested in was rated by other guys as 7/10, but in my opinion he is 9/10. I'm working on myself but I will never be conventionally attractive.

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I suppose, but I've also never met a guy that had a girl ask him out who was anot "unnattractive beta"

>but does that apply to less attractive girls too?

No but that doesn't make a difference. If the guy doesn't find you attractive, there's nothing you can do anyway so might aswell straight out go for it and know where to stand.

Well yeah, that would make sense, I never said otherwise. The argument was that the kind of guy who gets asked out by girls is too alpha to like it, to which I answered that this is crap since I was attractive enough to be straight out asked out by girls yet loved it.

This. But I should add that asking a guy all you need to do is take rejection gracefully, since there's almost no chance he's going to call you a creep or something.

Every butt ugly girl I knew had no problem getting dick and having men hit on them while ugly dudes can be absolutely invisible.

I look 4years younger then I am, 5ft9 tall, small frame, little bodyhair, pale as fuck and I'm not exactly pretty. I've had like 5-6 girls ask me out directly

Are you blond and blue-eyes by any chance? Do you wear glasses? Are you balding? You are probably just another humblebragging chad

Nothing "wrong" with either.
Asking everyone is definitely a better strategy than asking none.
The problem is that it can backfire in a number of ways.
Say there are 3 girls in a village. They are all beautiful, so you just decide to ask them out one by one.
The first girl rejects you because you are simply incompatible. The next rejects you because she wants another man.
The third rejects you because you asked her two friends out and she doesn't want to be the last pick.

Granted, in that scenario they all know each other and your options are more limited than in real life, but you get the idea.
Talking to all three girls could tell you that one have different goals and one have a different desire so asking the third out first would be more successful.
Being afraid of rejection by them all is definitely a thing to concern yourself with.
Especially if you can't afford to move to another village.

Now on top of all these things, there are a ton of scenarios where people say you shouldn't ask someone out.
Work being the most frequently cited.

>Looking young
Not something bad at all
>5ft9 tall
That's not short at all
>little bodyhair
Who the fuck cares/knows about this before approaching you?
>pale as fuck
How the fuck would that be a bad thing?

Sounds to me like you're attractive, just insecure.

Holy fuck man, what's your secret? Did you like make a deal with Satan or something?

its cute

My gf has 14 times my partnercount. I'm probably slightly better looking than her and we both aren't lookers.

I have tried this multiple times, even tried to do it in creative ways. Got turned down, asked if I just wanted to be fuck buddies instead, or rejected and friendzoned. I'm not fat, just average, but also half white/half asian, so maybe I'm too weird looking for guys.

I thought most white guys suffer from yellow fever
Another lie?

>not expecting to get rejected 9 times out of 10
I have some sympathy, but this is how half the world lives and you've been lucky enough to be sheltered from it until now.

Most white guys are afraid to have any opinions on race.

Everyone has different things they find attractive.Where I'm from, people don't generally date outside of their race. Even one of my friends straight up told me interracial dating is wrong.

Dude

By virtue of having precious eggs, men will always want women more than women want men

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>I thought most white guys suffer from yellow fever
It's mostly weebs and white supremacists.

half white/half asian is known for being like the most beautiful mix there is.

That probably has nothing to do with it.

No, they just can't talk about it openly because they are the only ones who can actually be prosecuted for it.

Tomato tomato.

Kek

I mean you've probably had 3 friends total in your 27 years of life so it's not like your a wellspring of wisdon

Um... Why would a *white* supremacist want *Asian* women? Lol.

Oof, that'd probably hurt if it were true. You can do better than that.

They often think that Asians are the model minority race. Many white women are degenerates that are gross race mixers. Asian women (note: not Asian-Americans) will happily be barefoot and pregnant, be traditional housewives, etc
This is just what I've been told, not what I personally believe

I use bumble often (girl has to message you first)
and after 5 days of us texting (mostly with her sending the first text) she still ghosted me (as in blocked my phone number and unmatched me) an HOUR before our first date lol

Do women just have no concept of how difficult asking people out is? Getting rejected is the rule not the exception.

>What's Jow Forums stance on proactive girls who initiate stuff with guys by for example texting first, asking them out etc?
I can only speak for myself but it boosts my attraction to a woman if she pursues me, that is assuming I found her attractive before hand. I think many other guys are like that though, when you know someone likes you and pursues you it automatically makes them more attractive. I get from a social perspective it's a big risk since a guy rejecting a woman is essentially saying you aren't attractive physically to me, which is a huge hit to a womans ego since women are valued predominantly for their looks. On the other hand it's got potential for big reward because if the guy is interested, a woman making the first move will almost certainly give her a huge advantage in locking him down especially if he is being passively pursued by other women.