Have crush on girl throughout middle school

fuck yeah, go for it bro OP sounds like he already knows what he wants anyway, and Its not advice.

woops wrong thread xD , but still tell your story

>obsessive person
You are so get some professional help. Nothing we say here will make any difference.

Sorry for the delay, I got a pain in the ass captcha problem. I'll try to keep it brief, but be warned I got a tendency to write walls.

>Met first girl the year we both turned 20, at a music festival in summer 2004. Let's call her Nina.
>She was a solid 9, platinum blonde, 5'9 and studied contemporary dance
>Hooked up after a night out a couple of months later. I fell in love during the first week, and started sleeping over regurarly the following months.
>She asked if she could move in with me, since she was living in a shared apartment with three other girls, and I lived on my own, in a seperate apartment in my parents' building.
>After a while of living together, we started having sex less and less frequently.
>Me, not knowing much about women at the time, I fell into beta-orbiter mode, and felt sorry for myself, but was just thankful I had a beautiful girlfriend.
>We decided to move to London. She got into a prestigious dance academy. I was accepted at a traditional art school.
>Before summer, she started modelling for a local agency. I was shuffed, but at the same time felt like I was missing out, since there was so little attraction between us.
>We moved in September.
The following year we probably had sex fewer than 10 times. I got along great at school, but she didn't get many friends, and felt out of place, living close to her school, and stayed in the area most of the time. She wasn't happy at all, and developed back problems, which made school difficult. We somewhat drifted apart, just stayed in and watched shit TV, whenever we were home. She didn't have her own computer, so she had her own folder on my laptop. One day when I was home alone, I found a text file named 'The Future', and my curiosity got the better of me. She had written that she wasn't attracted to me, and when we had sex, she was always thinking about being with other girls, but that she's afraid of being alone, so that's the reason she was still with me.

>chuffed*

>Went back to our home town together. I never mentioned reading her thoughts
>She had decided to quit school, and focus more on her modelling.
>After about a month, she went away to start filming her contenstency in our country's 'Top Model'. She wasn't allowed to talk on the phone or write during the production.
>She got voted out after three or so weeks.
When she got home, she was stone cold, and it was obvious she wanted to break up. She told me, but retracted it later that evening. We went back to London together, and agreed to try again, but to no avail. We both moved out of out apartment a few weeks later, and part of me was relieved.

As mentioned, she didn't have a lot of friends, so we kept in touch. I visited her new place a few times, and went with her when she was around looking for a London-based agency.
A couple of months later she got bed bugs, and had to get out of her place. She asked to share my bed, and I said yes, since I just had to be close to her at all costs. It was agony the following six weeks, as I was lying next to the most gorgeous woman I knew, but not allowed to touch her body.

Thankfully she moved back home for Christmas.

Before I get to girl number two, I'll summarize my relationship to Nina in the following:
>Hooked up during New Year's
>Hooked up again during Easter.
>She wanted to get back together, and we slowly did during summer.
>LDR following year. She developed an eating disorder.
>Tried an open relationship for a few months, but nothing came of it.
>I graduated, and moved back.
>Me and my mate moved into Nina's shared apartment, as the two girls she was living with moved.
>Nina and I had sex three times the fifth and last year we were together. Most of the time the three of us would just get high together.

Ask me anything, so I'll know people want to hear more. This was just a prelude.

>even if it happened it would be terrible
why

oh thanks for that story I WANT TO HEAR MORE

also my question is, are you a girl or a guy? thanks

I for sure want to hear more, that story was really good

I'm a 34yo man

Cont'd: Nina moved out, and we didn't talk in 4 months. I met a different woman, Leena, but she moved to London two days after we made out for the first time. She came back for Christmas, and we had a few nights together, although I wasn't really ready for anything new yet, due to my ever crippling depression. We continued a somewhat non-defined LDR, but she met different guys in London, and I had a ONS with someone from highschool.
Since Nina was still unable to connect with new people, or old friends (ashamed of her eating disorder, depression, etc.), she reached out to me again the following spring, after trying a lesbian relationship for the first time in her life - something she had been curious about ever since before meeting me. It ended badly, and I was there to cushion her. Even though I wasn't completely over her, I met someone new that summer. I was 26.

>Enter Elle, 23yo, London art student (yeah, I know), high energy, slightly unusual looking, but at least a 8.5 on a good day. A mix between a young Rihanna and Rachel Weisz.
>I told her this was only going to be a summer fling, since I was still unsure about my prospects with Leena, who was coming home for a late summer vacation later. At the time I had become more and more open to a non-monogamous lifestyle.
>Elle fell in love nonetheless, and I had to be the first person to ever break her heart, one month into our fling, as Leena wasn't interested in sharing.
>Things were still left unresolved with Leena after her visit, as she went back to London in early late September.
>Elle came back for Christmas, and we both fell in love. Elle said she was okay with me being polyamorous, but Leena wasn't, so I chose Elle.
>Elle and I became official, and she was only six months away from graduating from London, and she had the opportunity to visit more often.
>One month into our relationship, Elle said she wasn't really into the poly thing after all, and I agreed to be exclusive.

Cheers. I'm leaving out enough details to fill a book.

The day after getting me to swear to monogamy, Elle made out with her former boss and lover - an older man she also cheated with on her ex bf. I had my doubts, but believed her when she said it was a mistake, so I let it go and continued to agree on us being exclusive.
Long story short:
>She had another, non-official boyfriend in London, who she hooked up with after I broke her heart the summer before.
>I got my first suspicion in May after seeing pictures of them holding hands on facebook. I called her out on it, and she said they were just affectionate friends.
>I visited London, and helped her with her graduation.
>A week or so later, she admitted that she had slept with the other dude, and yet again I forgave her, as she said I had been unavailable at a time when she really needed someone.
>She spent the summer in the flat I shared with my mates, and we became more and more close.
>She decided to continue to live in London, as the art scene naturally is more fulfilling, so she got her own studio.
I visited in late November, to help her pack, as she had decided to move back home, only to find out that she had continued to sleep with the dude. I gave her an ultimatum, and she told me of course she chose me. I went back home a few days before her. When she got back, I could tell by the way she acted that she had done it yet again, and she admitted that she fucked him during the couple of days between our departures. As she admitted it, she had her first panick attack, so I don't push her.

>She lives in our home town for about a year, and during that time we're exclusive as far as I know.
>She gets panick attacks quite frequently, and all I can do is to spoon her until she regains control of her breathing. This leads to her becoming more and more depressed.
>Her sisters start blaming me for her depression, telling Elle that I'm manipulative and emotionally abusive. Elle doesn't argue with them.

>Interlude
My girlfriend Elle and my ex Nina had become close friends, since I introduced them the year before. Nina is in a relationship with another woman, who she met a month before Elle and I fell in love with each other. The three of them, and Elle's sister went on a summer trip to a festival in Barcelona. On her way back, we talked on the phone, but she seemed distant. After some time of uncertainty, we get closer together again. I'm either sleeping at hers, or in my studio, where I moved all my stuff after getting kicked out of my flat.
Her sisters are starting to blame me more openly for her panic attacks, and being manipulative and abusive. Due to her panic anxiety, she never confront them with it, so her whole family starts to blame me. I'm not welcome anywhere near them.

Fast forward to October 2012, she goes to London for three weeks, to stay with one of her sisters. When she returns she's distant again, and tells me she has decided to move back to Lnd in the new year.

The following posts are copied from a saved thread I made almost three years ago, so the language might be slightly different to my previous posts.

Before Christmas she asks us to break up, but I get her around again, telling her I'll change. I get a steady job to show her that I really mean it, since my art isn't showing any results. Our relationship isn't great, but we both want to continue.

>February 2013
She moves back to London. We talk every day, but I can't quite afford to go visit her yet. In May she tells me she needs me to come soon, or else she's afraid she'll start giving up. I tell her to give me some more time, but that I will come.
She meets up with Leena from 2010, who still lives in London. (I introduced them to each other, when we met by accident during Christmas.) Almost a week goes by without talking, and she sends me a text saying it's not working out. I realize I've just been lazy, and that I can afford to visit her, so I buy a plane ticket and tell her. She blocks me off facebook, and doesn't want to talk. I still want to go, but I go no contact to avoid further damage. I'm in London for about a week, meeting up with a few friends from school, and staying with one of my best mates. I start to get paranoid I'll accidentally meet her, and when I go back home, I'm releaved I didn't run into her.

The day after getting back, my best friend back home tells me she reached out to him, and that I should call her.
>Things are really bad, man
I decide to break the no contact, and call her up. She's been freaking out, starting to experience depersonalization, basically thinking she was dead. We talk for a couple of hours, and during the middle of the night we agree to just walk towards each other. She's about an hour away on bike. We meet up on a road running across a field, and it gets very emotional and romantic.
>Commence secret relationship behind everyone's back
Her family hates me, so they can't know. Her sisters are friends with my ex and her friends, who also are my friends, so we can't tell them. We start seeing each other in secret, just pretending to be friends.

She still doesn't want to confront her sisters against their accusations, even though she knows I haven't been emotionally abusive. After a few months they start to get the idea, and just tell her they don't want to hear my name, but do whatever you want. She helps me with a project, I help her with a project. We used to make art together, and things start to seem like they're back to normal.

She goes back to London to work, and I visit her in November. We have a wonderful time together, just the two of us. After I go back, she tells me it's starting to feel like we're a couple again.

>December 2013
Elle and her sister go on a trip to Thailand with Nina and her gf. I don't hear from her for about a week before she returns on Boxing Day. I'm sad during Christmas, because I was going to make her a gift (repairing something for her, that used to belong to her grandmother), but I wasn't able to, and then I couldn't reach her on her phone. When they get back, I meet up with her and her sister, and they talk about how sweet the French guys they met were.
>idk, whatever
Her phone broke, so that's the reason why I didn't hear from her. I sleep at her place, since the rest of her family is away for Christmas, but she's on her period, so we don't fuck. The next morning she tells me she has to admit something. I instantly know. She fucked one of the French guys. I yell at her for stringing me along. I tell her there are other girls wanting to get to know me better, but that I chose to work on our relationship, and then she does this. She breaks down crying, telling me to fuck off. I Storm off, and call up some mates to help me deal with this shit.

Earlier that year I got introduced to the younger sister of a friend of mine. I start texting her, and end up going to her place. I'm too drunk and messed up to fuck, but I go down on her, and sleep over.
During the next days I hear from Elle again. She tells me she had fainted, and seems like she wants to lure me in back in.

>January 2014
I cave in, and meet up with her. She's more submissive in her approach, and I just tell her that we're going back to hers. I finger her on the bus, and fuck her in the hall as soon as we lock ourselves in.
My friends starts to lose faith in me at this point. We keep at it for another month, and she actually goes and does something really nice for me, inviting all my friends for a surprise party for my 30th, and books a hotel room for us for the night. She leaves for London a few days later, and we leave it as a non-exclusive kind of non-official relationship, both wishing the other one doesn't fuck anyone else, but we shouldn't be constricted.

During spring she has at least three lovers in London. She's doing a lot better, having started with yoga and meditation, which puts an end to her panic attacks for good. We're skyping frequently. Every fourth week or so we start questioning our relationship, she doesn't want me to fuck anyone else, but she keeps ghosting me for a few days every time she fucks someone. It's not great, but we start planning to do stuff together during summer, and looking forward to her return in May.

She comes back and it's great for some weeks, she takes me out with her sisters, and things look like they could turn out for the better after all. We both work a lot, but still get some quality time together. She's planning a backpacking trip in South East Asia next winter, and will be here for at least half a year, saving up money. We plan a trip to London together in July.
About a couple of weeks before our trip, she starts ghosting me, telling me she needs space. I meet her on accident out on town, when I'm celebrating a friend's birthday. She's there with some other guy, and her friends physically blocks me from walking up to talk to her. They threaten to get me kicked out, and I spend the next day throwing up and crying.

I still want to go to London, because I already made plans to meet some close friends.

I have gone full no contact for about a week before the trip. She sends me a text asking if we're really not going to talk, and I ignore her. At the airport, before boarding the plane, she sits down opposite me, and I just get up and go to the bathroom. I ignore her the entire flight. We booked out tickets seperately, so we sit rows apart. When I'm waiting to collect my bag, she comes up and taps me on the shoulder. I just look at her puppy eyes and tell her "No," and leave. My stay is somewhat great, but I feel a lot of remorse. When I get back home, I start swiping on Tinder, and just want to get on with my life. I write a lot of my thoughts down, and eventually start to realize that our relationship never really had to become this piece of shit story. After all, I chose her over the Leena, because she was okay with me being polyamorous. I fuck some single mom off Tinder a couple of times, but I'm still set on wanting to keep fucking Elle. She tries to reach out a couple of times, and I start to preparing myself for picking up the phone next time.
About four weeks into no contact, she asks if we can talk, and I tell her she should call me after the weekend.
We end up talking for a couple of hours, then meet up, talked about our whole situation. I tell her I can take it or leave it, but I don't care anymore, and I still love her. We make out, and say goodbye.
We start texting lewd, and I convince her to come over to fuck. I set some rules, like we don't text each other unless we intend to meet within the next 24 hours, and we keep out of each other's life. I'm a mess, but I don't want her to know.

At a visit to the doctor, I tell him about my depression, and he refers me to get assessed for bipolar disorder. My whole world revolves around the next time she comes over, and every time she leaves my whole world falls apart. She's all I ever think of.
I start to suspect that she's seeing someone else, and eventually ask her about it.

It turns out she's been fucking a guy from work, and it's the same dude I saw her with before we went to London. I tell her it's not going to work out, and tell her I can't have any contact with her. After another couple of weeks, I walk into her on the streets, but I make it short. A week later she asks if I'm not going to talk to her before she's going backpacking. I don't repsond. I get another text telling me she's going to celebrate her birthday at my go-to club, so I can make sure I don't turn up.
The day before her birthday, she texts me again, asking to meet up. I tell her what this shit is doing to me, and I can't as long as she's fucking someone else, and don't do right by me by telling her sisters what actually happened back in 2012. She tells me she wants to come over, and I take it as a sign she wants to get on my side, so I agree. It gets late, and I realize it's not happening. She went out to eat with friends, and messed up the time, so yet again she keeps prioritising other people, when I'm such a mess already. I called her out for it, and tell her to enjoy her birthday. The next day she calls me on the phone, and telling me she saw me through the windows at the place I work. I feel like she's playing with my emotions, but I do want to leave it on a good note, so I go and buy her flowers with a written message, telling her to have a good time in SE Asia. Before my work day ends, I'm out on the streets doing some errands, she writes me, asking me why I'm not talking to her, and what the point of the flowers was. She tells me she was watching me on the streets for 15 minutes, but I didn't see her. At this point it's starting to break me. I get beered up with my mate, who really wants me to crash her party. I drunkenly go along, but just sit in the corner, making sure I don't see her. On my way home, releaved I didn't meet her, she taps me on my shoulder
>Why do you have such a huge pull on me, user?
I give up, take her home to my studio to fuck.

Is there any point in continuing still?

yes

During the weekend Nina calls me up and yells at me for two hours straight. She's fed up with me and Elle going behind everyone's back, creating such a mess, and tells me that if we can't be honest, they can't be friends with us anymore. I tell her that I always wanted to come straight, but Elle wanted to be secretive, because of all the bullshit with her sisters. Nina calls her up as well, which leads her to freak out over not knowing what I tell other people. I tell her we should meet up and talk it through. She doesn't want to that day or the next. After my appointment at the bipolar clinic, we finally meet up. I tell her that she should end things with the other dude, and tell her sisters, so we both can have peace. She tells me she doesn't want to give me much hope, but that she hopes we can still end up together, but thinks it'll take at least a year, possibly two until I'm ready. We're both glad we talked and say goodbye.
Later that week she texts me that she's ended things with the other guy, and that she told her sisters, and they said it was the best Christmas gift they could've received. She wanted to thank me, and wants to come over one last time before she leaves. She does, everything is good, the sex is deeply connecting, but I tell her that in order for me to get out of my depression, I need us to not speak to each other, while she's away. Before she leaves, she writes me that she's mine forever.

She texts me on Christmas Eve, two days after New Years, mid-January and two days before my birthday. I feel forced to answer, but I did mean it when I told her I didn't want ut to speak. She sends a lengthy text telling me how she loves me etc., and I write her a wall shaped letter, giving her an ultimatum. Either she promises me her full devotion, or I don't hear from her again. She doesn't respond.

>April 2015
It turned out I wasn't bipolar. I'm waiting to get assessed for depression. I've fucked one girl who needed a rebound, and feel better about myself. The woman I now consider my ex is in Nepal when the most devestating earthquake in 50 years hits. Nina had just been there on an exchange program, so she wants to meet me to talk about it. During the conversation, she tells me that Elle has another boyfriend.
>ofcourse.png
I call Elle to show my support. She's afraid and alone, and we talk for two hours.
One week later my mate shows me her facebook, and her relationship status is set to 'Married to...' a guy from our part of the country.
I can't quite make out how she had the time to write me a lengthy text in mid-February, and then have a fucking "husband" within 2,5 months. I'm done with this shit.

Start dating a woman I really like in middle of May. Think less and less about Elle, but knowing I'll have to meet her at some point, because Nina is getting married in late July, and she's having a bachelorette party we're both invited to.
>inb4 gender issues
Things are mostly great, but I get diagnosed with moderate depression and avoidant personality, which sets me back a bit. Things are good with the new woman I'm dating. Summer starts, and Elle is back with her pretend husband. I meet her on the streets one day, and she asks for a hug, and later texts me to meet up before the party. I agree that it's probably a good idea to have a short talk, but during our coffee we start flirting again. We're both laughing at ourselves at this point, and realize we can't be in the same room without attraction starting to stir. I send her a text asking if she wanted to come over, and she tells me it's tempting but best to avoid it. During the party we flirt some more, get shortly told off for doing so, go night swimming naked, and take a cab home together. Outside her house, where the husband thing is sleeping, she tells me she still loves me.

I tell her I love her, but one day I'll see her with a stroller, and it's going to break me completely. If she believes in the thing she got with this new guy, then I can't have anything to do with her. The next day I tell the woman I'm dating, and she breaks up with me.

The day before the wedding, husbando writes me and asks to meet to "check in" on each other - without Elle knowing. I think it's kind of creepy, and tell him no thanks. The next day I stay clear and enjoy myself. At the very end of the wedding party, I pull him aside and tell him I'm not going to have anything to do with her, so I want to make it clear he doesn't write me either. He nods and fucks off.

I'm saddened by losing the new woman, and after seeing Elle and the creepy dude on the streets again, I get fed up and write her, asking when they're moving. (She told me they were going to.) She didn't respond, so I went and told her what had happened with the woman I was dating, asking whether she had been honest with her guy. I never heard anything.

>September
My mate calls me up telling me she reached out to him again. I went on facebook and saw that she was single again. I don't do anything, and just wait. About a week later my mate tells me she was talking to him about putting up an exhibition, and wanted to involve me.
>rollseyes.gif
A few days later she writes me, asking to talk. I tell her I'm busy with clients, but try again between hours. She calls when I'm still busy, so I call back when I'm done for the day. I don't get any answers, so after trying a few more times, I decide fuck it, and take the bus to her parent's house. She's home alone. Long story short, we fuck all night long. I get her to cum seven times, and it's like nothing ever happened the last ten months.

We continue to meet up the next following months. In between, I fuck another woman that I've wanted for years. Elle goes away on some meditation camp for ten days in December.

When she returns she tells me I've been with her a lot of the time, in meditation, but she doesn't have time to meet me before Christmas. I'm spending Christmas Eve with my parents. My mother gives me a X-Mas stocking filled with candy, and tells me Elle was visiting last night, and spent two hours in their living room. This rubs me the wrong way, since she told me she didn't have time for me, and she would've felt like I was crossing a line, had I gone to her father, talking to him without her knowledge. A few days later I start fucking some Amazonian Barbie doll who's been eyeballing me the last six months.
My ex wants to know what's up, and I tell her that I didn't appreciate what she did. She gets mad, and I start to accept that our fun time is over yet again, but at this point I don't really care.

>January 2016
I continue to fuck the Amazon. Elle has cooled down, so I meet up with her as well. After I fuck her raw in the shower, she asks me if she should get tested, and I tell here yes, since I also went raw with the Amazon. She grows colder. She's going backpacking again in a few weeks, and doesn't want to complicate things. She still wants to see me, and we fuck for the last time in the middle of January.
I continue with the Amazon, who starts to get infatuated. Elle starts to fuck a new bloke from work, which I think is just rediculous, since she's going away soon. We meet up one last time after my birthday, and she lets me sleep over without having sex. She lets me watch her in the shower, and kisses me one last time. I'm done. I tell her off for always expecting things to be complicated, when all reasons for things getting that way, are her stupid backs and forths. She just wants to brush it off, so I tell her fuck this, and leave.

What happened after?

First time we checked in on each other was in April. She had met some diving instructor. Next time in July, we skype for three hours, and she tells me I'm still her soulmate, but she's moving to Australia.

The Amazon broke up with me after three months, confessing she didn't want to share me with anyone. I never fell in love with her, and felt like shit for stringing her along, even though she never told me she actually wanted a boyfriend. I fucked some homely younger woman four months later - the longest I've ever gone without sex, so idk. Decided maybe I should start looking for a proper girlfriend. Fucked a couple of single mothers off Tinder during the autumn. Matched with a size zero 24yo in November, and immediately fell for her. Only managed to go on two dates with her before Christmas.

Elle suddenly showed up at a private view for an art show, along with some common friends. I asked what happened
>Australia got complicated, user
She texts me asking to have coffee. I don't see the text until a few days later, and get a bad feeling. I don't want to be pulled in again, and I feel like her not telling me she was coming home, and going out with my friends is off-putting. I decide to text her back in a few days, but before I make it, she texts me, telling me she's pregnant, and keeping the baby.

I started an open relationship with the 24yo, but she moved away eight months later. Recently we've decided to pause the relationship. The last year I've fucked one 21yo, two 23yo, one 27yo yummy mommy. The 23yo just turned 24, and we've been keeping at it pretty much all year long, going on ten months.

Elle has gone back to school. She wrote me on her birthday last December, telling it's not what it used to be. She was sad, because nobody cares after you reach 30.
>Not in my experience, but hey what can you do

Her son just turned 1.

This summer I've visited Elle a couple of times, sleeping on the couch once a week ago, while I was helping her refurbish her house. I guess I still love her, but I'm in no rush to start building an intimate thing with her, now that she's preoccupied with her son. She tells me that she wants her kid to have at least one sibling, and I'm her best candidate, unless she meets someone new within the next year or two. She's blocked the baby daddy on all platforms, as he became a poisonous asshole, actually manipulative and emotionally abusive. The sisters got nothing on me in comparison.

Last fall Nina got a divorce, and moved into Elle's subletting flat. She got a new boyfriend, and is going on a van trip around Europe, until they either break up or become parents, in my estimate.

I can still see myself getting both Elle and Nina pregnant within the next few years. I've (jokingly) strung this idea on both of them, and they both thought it wasn't such a bad plan B. They could live together, raise three children together, while I only visit enough to make sure the kids got a father figure, and they get their forthnightly dicking whenever they aren't hopelessly trying to date. Either way, I'm not going to stop seeing women 8-10 years younger than me, strings or no strings.

What I've learnt in my years of struggle, is to avoid putting so much emphasis on the things that seem like they mean the most to you. Chances are they mean a lot less than you expect or sense, and they will pass as almost everything else does. Things that happen in life are simply that. There's no grand narrative in relationships, and as soon as you start to let go, you'll notice that beyond your tumultuous trouble, there's only going to be loving kindness left, no matter what form it takes, sexual or not. It's just people, and you got to just live with the fact that there's one thing in life that might never fade.

What a ride and what a nightmare. I'll never get into a poly relationship.

I've only gone full poly after things officially ended with Elle. Now I don't ever date anyone exclusively, and I make sure they know no later that the first date.

Elle tells me she's changed, and will only be monogamous with new partners - but I'll take that with a grain of salt. She forgave her baby daddy for sleeping with new women the three times she saw him abroad, during the first year after her son was born.
Btw, I only use the term arbitrary. Open relationship works for me as well, I got to be certain I won't replace anyone in the hiarchy, and from what I've learnt it's best to not have one. Relationship anarchy might also suffice. The point it I don't believe in monogamy, unless it's deeply spiritual - and it won't be unless we've spent years together and truly know. Simply dating someone doesn't cut it.

Anyway, never intended for this thread to be about polyamory. The point is that some people just never really leave you, and to accept it for what it is, is a lot less stressful than trying to force it to change into what your desires make you superficially wish for.

Did it ever occur to you to just cut and run from everyone when you were in that difficult situation?

Several times, which I've done. But the ones in question keep coming back, and I can't help but love them, at the end of the day. All the difficulties I've endured, I've grown from, and from where I'm standing at this point in life, I'm only grateful to still have them in my life. Unless something intimate happens between us, they'll feel like dear sisters to me.

Alternatively, the short answer is we live in a small city. 200 000 inhabitants. Why have enemies, when you can have beautiful women cook for you, with no obligations?

god damn nigga it would be more appropriate if you said you were french, god damn
I'm the guy who asked you to tell in the first place, I just woke up and came back to check the thread, I read it all

>Long story short, we fuck all night long. I get her to cum seven times, and it's like nothing ever happened the last ten months.

MY FUCKING SIDES LOOL

what a rollercoaster, life of an artist huh, all about people and travelling and art, I'll tell you what it sounds fun, minus the parts where you obsessed over those girls, but they're girls they always have tons of options and crazy personallities

fuckin 10/10 mate if you have any more stories please do but it sounds like you just put your life in here

any chance you can tell more about the amazonian princess? like how she looked like, describe some of your sexual experiences with her maybe?

anyway appreciate you taking the time dude! thanks

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I appreciate that you read it, it took a good while to post, due to the worst captcha-reload I've ever seen. I assure you I'm not french.

I've had my good share of fun, at least in the past three years. Obsession (or romantic hooks, as I tend to call it,) is fucking dangerous, and that was part of the point of this story. In light of the fact that women are one of my biggest vices, you could argue that I wasted my 20, mainly focusing on just two. I lost my virginity to my highschool sweetheart at 18. Didn't fuck anyone between her and Nina, so Leena was my third, and Elle was my fifth (ONS between the two of them.) I had turned 30 the first time I had sex with anyone after Elle, but that wasn't the end of my hook, as you've already read. I didn't really start releasing that shit until 2015, when I was 31.

Not inb4 It's easy to argue that I'm immaturely trying to make up for lost youth, by whoring out instead of acting my age and looking for a wife, but out of the 12 women I've fucked the past three years, only three have been ONSs. I am mostly interested in long-term, just not sexual/romantic exclusivity. The most important reason being my AvPD, which means I'm more likely to attach myself to the few people who are closest to me, and it has never worked out, as spending time (failing at) nourishing my partnership quickly becomes more important to me, than spending time working on my art. I'll be there at the drop of a hat.

>The Amazonian
>6/10 face
>6 feet tall
>blonde
>breast implants, simply fantastic
>colourful tatoos, a turquois Inca skull on her chest, dragon back piece, among other
>average waist/hip
>Manager for restaurant franchise, earning $185K
We dated for 3 months, but the latter 1.5 months I was on crutches, as I fractured my ankle. Didn't wear a cast, though. Nothing much to report from the sex. She told me I eat pussy like a fucking super hero, and for the first time in her life she really enjoyed anal fingering.

Honourable mentions:
The Amazonian hadn't been in love with anyone in six or so years, and fell hard for me. I had no interest in monogamy, but I never told her. A mistake I've learnt from, and corrected since.
It ended one night she got really drunk, and started telling me off for fucking a close friend of hers - which I had done, but ten or so months prior to our first hookup. It was unreasonable of her, and lead to me telling her that I can't promise that I won't fuck other women. She wasn't having it, told me I broke her heart, and that was the end of it. Less than a year later, she caved and got together with some bloke who had been drooling over her ever since we split. They are getting married in two weeks, after knowing each other for a year and a half. I can't see how that's a good idea, but baby wants her dress I guess.

thanks for telling man these are very interesting, I was honestly expecting her to be black since you said amazonian and all but sound like you meant she was the kind of girl that could strangle you in between her thighs ;)

It IS kinda out there and wild but, now that you put it into perspective it makes more sense, you were younger before obsessing over just a couple ladies and now you are releasing and reaching new heights that's great, I wouldn't say you wasted anything because you had fun, you already know this though :)

this has been great, original OP is long gone but you hijacked this thread well, if you have ANY more stories post 'em I'll lurk until the thread dies, and I wish you all the best in your journey, I really do! sounds like you have a lot more good people waiting for you to run into, I don't know much about girls I only had one long term girlfriend and she was a crazy russian, for close to two years she gave me her hot russian body along with all that craziness in her chaotic head, beautiful is dangerous!!!

Hah, I meant Amazonian in the sense that she's taller than a lot of men, in addition to being fairly fit. (She's gained weight in the last year, though.) I'm 5'9 myself. I'm also quadroon, and have never slept with anyone darker than me. I can't for the love of me get fully attracted to black, south american or asian women, apart from extremely rare cases. Being from Northern Europe, and never fell for the exotic fever meme, I naturally go for white women. Wouldn't mind me a Russian bombshell, but the chaotic craziness isn't anything I really need in my life. That being said, I do like women who get turned on by me sleeping with other women. The zero size I mentioned is like that, but the story is rather boring, since we haven't really seen each other for longer than we had an intimate relationship

I don't have any other stories this long, but one thing I'm opinionated about is how it's never too late to get someone back into your life (as long as there hasn't been any violence or abuse in the past.) The woman I was dating between the time of the Nepali Earthquake and the bachelorette party is one example. After we stopped dating, there was a period of back and forth, in terms of wanting to keep in touch and possibly be friends, which ended badly. She cancelled on me a couple of times, and when I called her out on it she told me that I scare her, and don't ever want to hear from me again.
She never unfriended me on facebook, for some reason.

1/2

2/2
Ten months later I saw her out on town, and as I was about to walk up to her for a friendly hello, she literally ran into the bathroom. The day after she sent me a text apologizing, and told me of course we should be adults, and able to say hello to each other. Six months later we chatted a bit, because she saw that I posted a video of a concert held by a friend we got in common. Another six months later, two years after we broke up, I saw her sitting on the outdoors serving area of a restaurant. Since she never unfriended me on facebook, I had seen that it was her birthday that day, so I went over to her and her friends and wished her a happy birthday. She asked me how I was doing, and sensed that I was in a very different place than in 2015. A few hours later she asked me out on a date. It never happened, due to her being busy with her kids a lot (forgot to mention she's a single mom, with kids from two different relationships - got knocked up when she was 18,) and got the flu the day we set our date on. In the past year, we've tried to arrange a date on two other occasions. She's super jealous, though, so I don't understand what she really wants, but I guess my point is if you let enough time pass, people will forget about what wasn't working, and look beyond to discover the reasons they were interested in you in the first place. As long as you behave. Disclaimer: this might apply more to single mothers, more than childless, younger women.

The 27yo I mentioned is another single mom, and for some reason she doesn't mind me coming over to her place just twice every year. This has been going on since October 2016, and I've only seen her four times. I don't even know why I don't see her more often, because this woman has the sweetest puss I've ever experienced, and she's a fun, kind, platinum blonde, fit, 5'6 kickboxer type.

I feel you man asian ladies seem like something out of this world, and I don't mean it in the sexy way I mean like I'm not interested in being with one loool, wouldn't be against it though

weird to think that at your age you have a pool of mothers to choose from, like I'm 22 so I only ever think about single ladies my age It's crazy to think some girls have kids, maybe my thinking is kinda messed up but I think once a woman has a kid or kids her attention diverges to the kid to and well they don't make for very good relationships because they have such big responsibilities, though I guess you're in that place in life where you want kids/soon will want kids, that's very interesting

desu that story doesn't make too much sense, I think the fact that you guys never met and dated again means that getting someone back.. Is possible, but not desireable

so many people say "why fix what's broken when you can get a new one", and well I think I'm the sort that believes in that more, but that might just be because I am relatively young in the dating world and in general

awesome stories man, I'd actually be surprised if you'd have any more than these if you do please do post! but if not I had a wonderful time reading, thanks a lot you've enriched a fellow user's life for a while :) hope you've had fun sharing as well.

If you couldn't tell, I quite enjoy telling my past stories, so thanks for replying, my dude. Glad it's been an interesting read.

>weird to think that at your age you have a pool of mothers to choose from, like I'm 22 so I only ever think about single ladies my age
Yeah, single mothers can be a lot of fun, but they aren't what I spend most my time on. I could consider a steady relationship with Elle again, but I can't see myself getting serious with anyone else who has children already. As I said earlier, the gal I've been banging reguraly in 2018 just turned 24, and is not a mother, and got plenty of time until she has to start worry about it. She's not even had a boyfriend before, and was fairly inexperienced when we met. At long last I got to do anal for the first time in my life, and it was nice that I took her anal virginity at the same time. I've always felt a bit cheated out of it, in earlier relationships, since I was spending a lot of time with women who were up for it 'one day', but it never happened because I never pushed for it, or we didn't prepare for it in the rare cases where they wanted to try. The current woman is begging for it half the time, always prepared, and she can take it balls deep with little to no warm up. It makes it easier to avoid missing what I had in the past, even though I would take most of the women in my past back - but not in the sense you mean.
It's both possible and desireable for me to take many of my former partners back as sexual partners. However, I wouldn't get into committing, romantic relationships with many of them. Especially not the single mom from 2015. She's incredibly beautiful and hot, but pretty nuts, and not in a good way.

I'm not in any rush to get any kids, though. My life is far from orderly enough for that to be a good idea. And should I want to, I'd like it to be with someone I've known for years, and know I can work with, which makes it a lot more logical to want a young girlfriend.

>The current woman is begging for it half the time, always prepared, and she can take it balls deep with little to no warm up. It makes it easier to avoid missing what I had in the past

god damn sounds like a dream gal

turned 24 and didn't have a bf before and now she's taking it up the ass like a champ, sounds like dreams do come true

I'll get a lady like that one day, and
>I'm not in any rush to get any kids
yeah I obviously agree with that, fuck kids to be honest, they sound like a waste of time you could have one at any time I think before 40 is aight so you'll get to see your kids to at least when they're 30, thanks for the stories again!! I'm off to sleep, I did notice you love telling your stories and you posted replies from a thread of yours from 3 years ago so I bet I'll see you around the board if I lurk more! I'll remember Elle and the lot, good luck with everything mate!

Oh shit user, you had a relationship, a girl that wants to fix things with you, AND girls hitting on you?
What an awful life!!!!

OP is kill