Friend With Suicidal Thoughts, Refuses Help

>incoming long message, brace yourself anons

So, one of my friends is verging on suicidal. He says we've all abandoned him (his ex gf is our friend too so we're kinda stuck in between). Problem is; he doesn't socialise at all, expects everything to come to him and blame the world for every issue. Also you're either his friend or his ex's friend; there's no in between.

It's childish as fuck I know. Anyways, he's feeling depressed cuz of this, and every time I try to speak to him he goes off on a "woe is me" rant about how we've abandoned him.

Just tonight I sent a wee message (it was his birthday today) to coax him to play an online game with me, he replied with "u fucker didnt even come out for my bday, fuck you flaker" etc etc (considering that I didnt receive an invite from him).

So I'm worried, rang a Mental Health hotline on his behalf and asked what we can do to make him realise he needs proper help. They asked me to let him know I called them about it, so I did.

He kinda ignored what I said and kept insulting me, saying things like "fuckin flaker abandoned me/i know who my friends are now/you can't even hold onto a girl/wankbag catch yourself on" etc.

So far I've been taking it on the chin and simply kept saying that he needed to call the crisis helpline, just for a wee chat is all. I won't lie, some of his comments cut deep, but I'm still concerned.

Anyways, I'm at my wits end. How do you make someone this childish grow up and accept that they need to stop blaming everybody for their problems and seek help?

>TL;DR - friend is suicidal, stubborn as fuck, refuses help and insults me when I try to be there for them. Continually self pitying attitude and drives everyone away, then blames us for it. How to fix?

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>How do you make someone this childish grow up
You can't, because you're the soft sensitive friend. That self-pitying fuck need someone who takes no shit to smack him around on a daily basis.

I've tried that. My first response was "man the fuck up, stop blaming everyone else and accept responsibility"

His response was to laugh and say I was full of shit.

See what I mean? It's worse considering that I was once the exact same... years back.

It's because he KNOWS that you're the soft sensitive friend. You'll need a personality overhaul to make it work but that's too much effort for an ungrateful person like him.

Just let him figured it out on his own. You already did all that you could possibly done as a friend.

>You'll need a personality overhaul to make it work but that's too much effort for an ungrateful person like him.
not op but how do??

While I suspect his suicidal thoughts may be attention seeking, he's actively saying hes considered just not being around anymore.

How can someone ignore such a potential threat in the hopes they'd get over it?

One of the steps it to increase your voice tone everytime you speak. It adds to your alpha presence, and ruins your throat.

universal or do i have to be a guy for that to work? also what else, what are the other steps?

you're right not to want to ignore it m8. that's one of the worst things you can do if a person is legit suicidal. have you tried asking him what would make him happy? what he'd need to start feeling alright again?

Yep - but its like dealing with a 12 year old.

Everything is now our fault. We're the reason he's suicidal, we're the reason his gf left him, we're the fucking bane of the Earth.

How can a 28 year old get this far in life with such a fucking adolescent maturity? I've tried tough love, listening and reasoning. All of the above - nothing works.

I'll admit - he is a cunt. A selfish, stubborn cunt. But if he's suicidal (even if it's a cheap ploy for attention) it can't be ignored. Just dunno what to do

Does he live with his parents? Is there anything they could do to help him?

No. His ma and da are wasters, no parental support will be forthcoming.

He has a big brother (paedophile) and a younger one (who I think doesn't want or know how to help).

>28
>yuo are like little babby watchthis.png
laugh to keep from screaming m8. it's all you can do sometimes and this is def one of them.

what's his reasoning for how everything is your guys' fault? he'll probably see the "trap" coming a mile away and go turboautist smug 12yo mode the literal millisecond his brain starts signaling the cognitive dissonance warning, but still. it's worth asking and seeing if he'll think through shit and realise where he's being unreasonable.

also does he reach out to you guys ever or is it always you initiating?

both of you are over 21, yes?

Do chad shit. Literally do it.

Go to strip clubs, B dubs, watch fucking sports.

It's a great builder for bonding and shit. As much of friend of you are to ex, you just can't have them be together anymore.

>Just separate the two ex's, and become mediator-bro.

Jesus. I'm not sure what to recommend. If you're determined to be proactive, perhaps seeing him in person would help cut through the bullshit (if you don't think he'd agree to meet, you could try dropping by his unannounced. It might be that he's putting up a front which would crumble if you were to meet face to face). Otherwise, perhaps the best thing to do would be to reassure him that you and your friends aren't against him, and that you'll be there for him if and when he needs you to be.

He reaches out sometimes, and sometimes I do.

Tonights argument stemmed from me casually inviting him to play PUBG (an attempt at online gaming and social interaction) - then he started the tirade.....

To be honest, I can't be arsed with him socially. He's a miserable bastard, bringing the fun down and consistently self pitying and appallingly pigheaded.

I wish he wasn't, but here we are.

Meeting him is something I'm really not wanting to do. I rarely leave my own house; and to be honest, all he does is sit in his living room, smoking and playing shite on the PS Network. Never really goes out on proper social events when invited (and his ex, being a good friend, tends to get the same invites).

Aye, I'm trying to just reassure him that if nobody cared we wouldn't waste time chatting until the early hours.

Seriously, what did you do before all this?
At this point, you don't seem like friends.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make the horse drink. I'd personally drop him as a friend completely imo since he seems to drive everyone away and let him live on as a wuss. It's your choice, but it's hard to change someone when they're that pathetic, especially since they've convinced themselves of this false reality

>He reaches out sometimes, and sometimes I do.
oh, brilliant. set boundaries. tell him you're down to hang out and, if he ever wants, down to try and help him work through this shit yourself or help get him to somebody who can. tell him you are not down to be his on-call punching bag/emotional tampon/complaint dump. and then stick to those boundaries. that's the important part.

well he's more my brothers friend. I'm an acquaintance more than anything else.

Hell, he got me arrested years ago because I punched him in the face!

Even if I don't see him as a deep friend, I feel obliged to look out for someone in such dire straits; he's also fighting with my brother as well.

If he were to commit suicide, that would weigh on the lot of us.

It sounds like you're a good guy for caring about someone so unpleasant. As long as he realizes that, you've done all you can. For what it's worth, I've known people like this before, and I seriously doubt his threats will come to anything--some people just want the world to feel sorry for them. I wish you all the best in dealing with this.

Thanks user; I dunno about that; I honestly don't want to be in the same room as him (nor leave my own house often for that matter!) but I wish I could talk some sense into the stupid twat.

I really appreciate yours and the others advice. Wishing you all a good night.

>he got me arrested years ago because I punched him in the face!
punch him again lmao
Seriously, though, it's not your fault if he ends up killing himself. Yeah, it would hurt a lot because you are doing what you can, but you are not to be held accountable for his life. In the end, he's a fucking adult, and he's responsible for his own choices.

You both sound dumb. That's my advice.

>you can't even hold onto a girl
tell him he doesnt have the balls to kill himself, this shithead needs to die