how do I learn how to carry a conversation (for longer than 10 seconds). I have zero friends, never had a gf, etc
>see grill exiting train with me
>we walk next to each other for a while
>want her to be my gf
What should I have said to her? How do I improve conversation skills
>tfw work in the downtown core
>girls are wearing dresses like pic related
>I'm wearing jeans and a casual shirt
>lanklet Chads in suits everywhere
How do I even compete?
Jeez H Christ it's always the same shit with you. Listen, you couldn't have gotten some girl who was just walking next to you for a while to be your gf. It doesn't happen. You can open a conversation with her, yes, but that would be the end of it unless you see her again. Get your priorities straight.
Jeans and a casual shirt are all you need if you can leverage your personality. You can't do that with random hoes. Find somewhere that relates to what you like, talk to the girls there about it. The less time you have to spend finding what you have in common the better.
And yes, there are people who could accomplish all this but you're not one of them.
>Find somewhere that relates to what you like
i don't have any good interests tbqh
i've tried dance lessons, but i don't know what to even say to the girls i'm dancing with
i've went bouldering before. literally everyone else, both guys and girls, are with their friends. and i don't know what to say to start talking with them
You need to make friends first. desu i'll bet you're about to say you have assburgers in a couple posts in which case most girls are automatically out of your league.
I only have an easy time having conversations with people I like and share common interests with (not hobbies just anything we'd like to talk about).
Why did you want the girl on the train to be your girlfriend? It sounds like you didn't know her even slightly, she could have been anyone.
and how do i make friends?
>about to say you have assburgers
i have not been diagnosed. but given that i have no social skills, and pretty much a mute, i would say it's likely
>common interests
i don't have too many interests tbqh, i lift, i browse Jow Forums, watch movies/tv, that's about it. but what's worse, is that i don't even have the social skills to talk about these things
>hear coworkers talk about exercising and lifting for more than 15 minutes
>doubt i can talk about it for a single minute
>Why did you want the girl on the train to be your girlfriend?
because i'm a lonely sad loser that wants a qt3.14 gf
I wish I could help user, but instead I feel the pain as I am a lot like you, except probably even worse as most of my interests are too obscure for normies to even know what they are. I devote most days to trying new things, hoping to find something they could understand, but that stuff just bores me. And my tastes are black and white, so all I can do is speak in cynicism.
Plus I don't really know how to have a conversation without complaining about myself as that is essentially the only thing I can really discuss. If it isn't about me, I don't even know what to say.
OP, not as harsh a question as it sounds but if you don't have anything you think you can bond with people over then, what do you have to offer people?
Like friendship and romance don't need to be based on common interests (liking cross fit), but it has to be based on a genuine interest in the other person (wanting each other to succeed).
So, find some people you can help, idk, volunteer somewhere, mentor someone, just do something for other people. You'll meet people, occasionally women, and they'll see you have something to offer them.
>something to offer
such as? this always seems like a vague, never explained idea.
how does one get something to offer? what are examples of things that can be offered?
Assburgers isn't a real disease. What kind of asshole would name a disease that seriously affects people's lives assburgers just so we would make fun of it forever?
Dude i loled
Something to offer, like whatever other people need. Your time, money, mental or emotional energy, etc.
Take for instance, you have a pet shelter in your city, volunteer to walk the dogs. Or join a political campaign. Anything to get you out around people helping them do stuff.
wouldn't that limit me to the people doing those things? how is volunteering offering value to other people. how do other people value, not everyone volunteers
>walk dogs
shelter jobs are hard to get, they all need references just so i can be the guy that picks up dog poop
do what you like doing, try to develop yourself professionially. soon or later you'll meet a chick thatlikes you.
aspergers dont get normal chicks, and thats fine... you d be bored with them. soon enough.
sex alone isnt enough to satisfy your mind trust me. you need a girl that suits your personality.
its worth the wait even if it means years. and ik the meantime: dont catch stds from sluts.
condoms dont protect sufficiently against HPV and other stds. have some. self respect and respect for. your future partner and try to abstain from worthless whores.
conversation skills can be learned. it is not hard. a lot of it is paying attention and practicing. improv helps a lot.
talking to strange girls can also be learned. it is a bit harder and a more tricky to execute.
send me an email at [email protected] if you want to talk on the phone about these things. I know a lot because I worked myself up from someone who was terrible at conversations to someone is good and can open strange girls and get their numbers.
women belong in the kitchen or the bedroom, should be barefoot and pregnant, that we should lower the age of consent, and engage in a little domestic discipline when required?
That we should vote for far right christian fringe groups that have no chance of winning, so that the mainstream parties (conservative / republicans) politicians will start to represent the above values and people like you? (moving the needle)
Really, nobody's even mentioning the basics? You talk about whatever's going on around you. If it's crowded and hot, talk about how it's crowded and hot. If she talks back, great. You could segue to something you'd rather be doing, like "I wish I was at the beach surfing" or whatever makes you look cool and isn't a heinous lie. Try not to ask too many direct questions about her, especially with one-word answers or yes or no answers, these are conversational dead-ends. You want to keep the conversation open and just lightly jump from topic to topic with no end in mind. Practise makes perfect, just talk to strangers whether you find them attractive or not, about literally anything you can both see that you find interesting. Work up to more attractive people and treat them the same.
If you're in a special situation you can jump right to the chase. For instance I met a girl by pure chance on a mountaintop and asked her if she wanted to go camping with me within like 5 minutes. That's a romantic thing that immediately implies interest. But if fate hasn't delivered you a kodak moment just start small and plants seeds. I hate to say it but customer service jobs are actually good training for all this. Best of luck out there.
I was going to make a thread similar to this. I'm the same, I barely talk to most people because I'm not compelled to say anything (even when I'm not nervious), but I also have problems talking to people that I would like to befriend. Certain people I get very nervous when talking to (not necessarily people I want to befriend), and I always don't enjoy those conversations even when they go well because of it. I really don't like 99% of the people I meet, and I dislike humans fundamentally, so I don't like the idea of trying to be endearing to other people, which is probably the biggest problem for me since I can't bring myself to even try to be entertaining or pleasent to talk to. I'm pretty obsessed with being better than other people in every way, and online I constantly shit on people online because of their incompetence (can't really do it IRL because of social repercussions). The majority of my interactions with other people are negative or at best neutral. It's like I want to be liked and do well socially for ego's sake, but hate the idea of trying to develop that skill, and I don't like the people I'm talking to anyways (but then when I meet someone I do want to talk to I can't properly do so without being nervous and retarded). I don't really think there is a solution for this other than forcing myself to interact with more people to build up that base skill set for socializing, and to desensitize myself when talking to other people. Maybe taking an anti-anxiety drug would help because that's a big part of it and everyone in my immediate family is similar with lots of anxiety problems and panic attacks (which thankfully I don't have).
Of course you only want stacy
who doesn't?
?