Go on a date with a cute girl

>tells me I seem like a great guy but somehow, she's just not feeling it.
I can tell you why that is, there is no friction in your interactions with her.

If i had to take a guess you did the following things
>trying too hard
>being too invested
>avoiding tension and friction at all costs
>trying to present your boyfriend qualities

You need to get the girl into a position where she wants to woo you, not the other way around, but nice guys give the girl all the power, which results in her not being sexually attracted to you. At all.
And sexual attraction is most important. Far more than showing what a good potential boyfriend you are, being all romantic and comfortable from the get go. That's not interesting to girls in the beginning, unless they already deeply fell in love with you. If it's anything less than that, then this won't work.

I'm almost 27, I'm not that young anymore. I don't know man, I know I sound like I did things right, even when I run these stories by my boys they can't seem to figure out what I did wrong since it seems like I did so much right.

Well, this was the second date. But, yeah I don't know. I'm trying to tell myself for whatever reason the spark wasn't there... but fuck man. It's hard to accept. I just keep thinking things like, "Maybe if I was taller, maybe if I had a nicer car, a better job, better place, maybe if I had just said this instead of that," etc. I just don't get it man, like I see so many of my friends who don't even try as hard as me to find and date women just find a girl and get into a relationship for years. It never happens for me. I'm nearly 27, I've never had a serious girlfriend. Hundreds of dates, plenty of short lasting flings, never anything real. And usually it's just, the girl lost interest.

I don't know man. I keep feeling like something is wrong with me, or something I'm doing is wrong. I really try to have more faith in myself like that girl said but... fuck it's hard to believe in yourself when you try your hardest over and over again, try your best to feel confident, even develop over time the ability to be smooth, confident, funny and collected.

>trying too hard
Dunno about that, I just tried to have a fun date with her.

>being too invested
I don't know man... I mean she was my number one pick, I have other girls I could see. I don't know. I mean, I'm still fucking thinking about her after I basically got dumped, so maybe this one is right.

>avoiding tension and friction
Don't know what you mean by this to be honest. Like, I initiated physical contact with her quite a few times, teased her about certain things, I certainly would have enjoyed some friction between us.

>presenting my boyfriend qualities
fuck man, I don't even know what it means to be a boyfriend.

I mean, I thought there must have been some kind of attraction between us for her to want to go to a beach and show off her body to me and see me too. I'm a strong guy who lifts, I dress well and so on. I asked her things like wanting to hear her singing voice, telling her I'd think she looks hot in a swimsuit. Like, I literally don't know how you're supposed to "build" sexual attraction, I thought it was just there or it's not, and clearly if she's desiring to do so many things together with me, she must have been attracted to me.

I just can't believe I have like 3 different women I could date right now and I'm still lying up awake in bed hoping this girl texts me in the morning, even though I know it won't happen. She texted me every morning for 3 weeks. She invited ME to the beach.

Sounds like you have charm and personality.
Hows your looks, height, body, face, clothing style???

>I mean, I thought there must have been some kind of attraction between us
There was. Attraction happens on a spectrum and she was around the mildly interested area.

> I literally don't know how you're supposed to "build" sexual attraction, I thought it was just there or it's not
No. You can‘t leave it to circumstance alone, you can build more attraction and also ruin attraction.

>fuck man, I don't even know what it means to be a boyfriend.
Even if you have never had a girlfriend, from reading your post it still comes off that you were trying to show her what a good potential boyfriend you could be and that‘s not interesting and most importantly NOT NECESSARY to get a girl. Remember that.

You said you complemented her and initiated physical contact. That‘s good. Some guys on here would even be too afraid to do that. But did you tease her? Did you try to frame questions in a way that would make her try to qualify for you? E.g. „I really like it if girls do X. Is that something you are into?“. Did you ever break your princaples or changed your opinions/believes when she said she doesn‘t like something that is in contrast to what you belief? Did you ever move conversations in a more „provocative“ area or do you try to keep your topics as safe and free of possible offensiveness at all costs to not make her uncomfortable? E.g. did you ever talk about sex, kinks, funny sexual encounters in the past?

When I read that a girl said „everything was great, you are a great guy I‘m just not feeling it“ that just sounds to me the guy was unpolarizing and boring because he wanted to play it safe.

>Hows your looks, height, body, face, clothing style???
After achieving an acceptable minimum with thise things, those are barely relevant for your success with women. Don‘t plant this seed into OPs head, or he will become one of those clueless jackasses who thinks you get women with materialistic or shallow things alone. When in reality you need NONE of that. All that matters is your behaviour.

I'm 5'8", which I know is not attractive for most women. Ethnically I'm Guyanese, meaning I'm something of a mix of Indian and Black. I am told frequently that I have a handsome face by women, even the ones that dumped me. I'm not trying to sound arrogant, but I notice women smile at me fairly frequently, and feel attraction in their eyes. My body is in good shape, I lift, eat well and have defined muscle. My clothing style is fairly clean cut when I'm on dates, and in general to be honest. I have kind of an older, well used Toyota, but it gets the job done and runs well. One insecurity I have is that my job is not that great, I studied civil engineering but had really bad experiences working in the field, right now I work as a machine operator and staff trainer at a steel mill and have some messed up hours. I'm considering taking a job that pays even lower, just to be able to work morning shifts and maybe search for other kinds of jobs, possibly applying to be a police officer since I think I could do it and it's a decent career.

Like, I am such a dumbass at this shit. I know there are dudes with min wage jobs who probably get way more ass than me, even though they're uglier than me. And yet still, when that one guy talks about putting the girl in a position where she wants to "woo me", I just keep thinking "I need a better job/car cause they probably think as charming and fun as I am, I'm not a very 'successful' man in the accepted sense."

I did tease her about certain things she said or did that was funny. I've left out one huge aspect about this girl: she has cerebral palsy. I asked her about the challenges she faces with cerebral palsy. She is high functioning, can swim and walk and so on, but does have an awkward gait, a lisp and stutter, also she was very physically frail. I did things like help her to open doors or carry heavy things which seemed like the right thing to do, given she is literally disabled.

So yeah, I got dumped by a disabled girl after spending around $100 on a date. Go me.

I asked her things like, would she be willing to travel to my city to spend time with me (she took the handicap service transportation to meet me, traveled like an hour on the highway, she can't drive), would she be willing to go on camping trips or travel to another country with me since I've always wanted to do things like that with a girlfriend.

I would never change my principles for someone. I commented on liking some of the conservative politicians in our area, but honestly, most of our values and principles seemed to line up from what I could tell.

As for discussion about sexual topics, I made it very clear to her many times I find her sexy, I rubbed her thighs, held her hands, stroked her hair, kissed her neck, I did kiss her after we sang together as I said. She was very thin, in a sexy way to me and I told her that. I even told her I was disappointed about the rain because I wanted to see her abs in a swimsuit. But no, I did not discuss my personal sexual kinks outside of finding her race attractive (Mixed white and asian) or previous sex encounters. I actually tried to make jokes about the nature of the sexes, she found my observations funny.

After she told me her feelings, or lack thereof, I asked her at one point if I seemed boring, and she immediately was like "No! you're actually such a fun, cool person!" So yeah, dunno man. Maybe she just digs white dudes and I'm dark, dunno.

Attached: abkasa mikasa abs.gif (500x281, 909K)

Like honestly man, I know behaviour matters a lot. But in a world where women chase tall, handsome men with money, it's impossible to deny these things matter to an extent and can make you sexier to women. I have below average height, am told many women find me handsome and my financial situation isn't the greatest, so that's what it is. There are definitely guys who surpass me in two or three of these aspects.

why on earth do you fucking faggots keep asking "do you like me" "why do you like me"? why on earth do you want to fucking know? do you think it'll make you hate yourself any less?
DON'T. ASK. THAT. SHIT. IT WILL DRIVE ALL WOMEN AWAY, YOU NEEDY SHIT.
I always let them ask dem questions, I don't need to know shit. I'm able to read people because I'm not an autist, and so should you if you're not an autist

I agree with everything you're saying 100%. Girls (both genders) like guys who are themselves authentically. It's a very unattractive trait to fake yourself for the sake of pleasing other people or thinking that you are doing other people a favour. For a friend or potential partner.

>Did you ever move conversations in a more „provocative“ area or do you try to keep your topics...
These questions are asked because you want to check if she is worthy of your time, energy and efforts. You put the pressure on her instead of putting it on yourself, so that she will sweat also for the sake of impressing you like you sweat to impress her. By not checking her resumé you give the impression that you take whatever you can which is a bad sign in her eyes. You see guys who don't give two shits about a girl, and the girl goes home to her friends and discuss that guy for HOURS on how to impress him etc. while the guy in question continues to live his life and not seeking approval or worthiness from the chick or anyone else. Basically, you attract females more the less you actually give a damn about what they think of you.

I don't hate myself, what the fuck. I'm trying to actively learn how to not fuck up in the future. But I understand that sometimes a girl can ask you a question, and apparently you're never supposed to ask her the same thing. Like she asked me why I messaged her or why I found her attractive despite her having cerebral palsy. So it seemed only reasonable after we've gone on a nice date and kissed and so on, to just casually ask what it was about me that made her interested.

I mean, after this experience I'll probably never ask the question again. But I seriously didn't think it was "needy" even though apparently it's always needy no matter what.

I asked her things like if she'd be willing to meet up with me, if there were certain activities she'd enjoy (camping, going to comedy clubs, traveling) because I've always wanted to do those things with a girlfriend. I did check her resume to some extent, but it's not like I was "drilling" her in that sense.

Like, I get that the standoffish douchebag who just focuses on himself always attracts the girls the most. But how are you supposed to ever attract a girl you're interested in if you don't show interest in her or flirt with her?

It just seems like I basically grabbed my chances with this girl, that weren't bad, and apparently cracked it's neck and then repeatedly stabbed it to death just by asking what it was that struck her as attractive about me, cause she literally asked me the same question.

Like clearly I'm mad fucking stupid at this dating shit, I get that. I've read dating/pickup books, art of seduction and made thousands of Jow Forums threads since this board existed, still haven't gotten it apparently. sometimes I think I must just be cursed or some shit.

>I'm able to read people because I'm not an autist, and so should you if you're not an autist

Yeah, about that. I never bring it up, but I was literally diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome as a child, so yeah, I am kind of an autist who has struggled for years with basic social interaction. The fact that I can even date women and make friends at this point was the result of years of aggressively trying to focus on improving myself in these aspects. Clearly I'm still lacking though, so I just gotta work harder. I just try to imagine I'm a normal person, forget I was ever diagnosed and behave as charming as I can while still being myself. It took a long, long time and a lot of lost friendships to get to this point, and I'm still fucking it up at times.

Never denied these things don‘t matter. They do. They just aren‘t detremental and there are men who want to pity themselves and use it to self defeatingly blame their failure on something they can not control, which is why I feel it‘s necessary to point out: it‘s not that important.

you start to get my point, it is always needy, no matter what. Women can get away asking these kind of things, but not men. You can only ask that shit if you're in a relationship and want to know why would her get on with you. Don't ever ask it again, and not in the fucking first date man.
Also, don't try to "pursue" her, don't put too much effort into it. You sound like you could make an ass out of yourself just to make her laugh and that's not the kind of guy a girl wants to be with. Make her laugh in other ways. be cool and you'll be golden

I think you messed up by making her think. When you make girls think, and I don't know why this happens in general, but they become less interested in you. Especially on first dates.

You had her under your spell, your seduction process. But you gave control away, and that's okay, it happens to the best of us. That's why women drive us crazy, make us do irrational things we normally wouldn't think to do.

Women, heck, everyone want to be seduced. There's no logic to that. As long as it feels right, anything goes. If it feels about right, and you're winning on impressing and entertaining her, build sexual tension and kiss her. You should have began with a hug hello. If she didn't give a hug, shes either hard to get, which sucks or just a plain dub.

Give her a chance to think about the kiss, unless she already really likes you, then she's gonna think of reasons NOT to kiss. In this case, she began thinking of this other guy when you gave a chance to think critically.

I get that it's not that important. Like I said, I try to focus on everything else good about myself, being charming, having fun on dates, being flirty etc. The only time I started to wonder if it mattered was after the girl let me down, and even after all that, I know it doesn't matter that much. Something is wrong with what I'M doing.

Like I said man, I'm unironically medically Asperger's. I'm learning these things over years and years and years of failures. I honestly think I've tried harder at socializing and dating than anyone I know outside of like, low functioning autists who can barely exist in society. Clearly I'm still dumb at this shit. I thought it was one of those things that was a flirty thing to ask, I've asked it in the past and ended up getting laid on the first date with girls. I wasn't making an ass of myself to make her laugh, I was making her laugh by telling jokes and observations. I'm not self-deprecating at all, me pointing out all my flaws in this thread are me being honest with myself and not something I brought up around her.

I literally did kiss her. And we hugged as soon as we met. It was a second date. Hugged on the first date too. But yeah, I'm now realizing the big key fuck up move was probably popping that question. Never again, I guess, unless I actually break this curse I seem to have and actually have a real, actual facebook official girlfriend or some shit.

Well, in the end there‘s also the chance that you two don‘t click. If everything you said was true then there is nothing left to just accept it and move on, because sometimes you can „do everything right“ but it doesn‘t work out.

Only things I would criticize is spending so much money on her, acting too invested, remarking on the fact that you find her attractive for her race and then thinking it has something to do with your own race that she wasn‘t attracted. It‘s hard to ignore that someone is black. So if she still went on two dates with you then clearly this wasn‘t the dealbreaker.

I mean, the money wasn't JUST on her, I was eating way nicer food than she was and enjoying it. I still have veal and the fudge cake we shared in my stomach. I enjoyed singing karaoke too, it was straight up fun. Everything she wanted was the cheap stuff. Honestly, I guess I need to let go of my race insecurity (been turned down by a lot of white and asian girls in the past) because you're right, she was giving me two dates, this obviously wasn't the deal breaker. But yeah, even though I might have a racially fetishistic attraction to Eurasian women (yes, I know how gross this sounds, but I'm being honest: those Eurasians turn me on like crazy), it was probably something that was better left never said. I told her something along the lines of her being very unique and that I found her facial features sexy.

But yeah, you're right: maybe we just didn't click.

Well, there's clearly some important things for me to learn from this experience, so I guess I gotta just take the L and not repeat those same mistakes.

dude, you really have aspergers? Didn't read it if you wrote it in the thread, so, sorry if I was harsh.
I would give you more advice but I have stuff to do, but one thing I can tell you is: don't give up on improving. Take this as a lesson to learn from and move on. "learn what?" you might ask, and it's a valid question, but sometimes the stuff you learn from your past fuckups comes later on in life. Even if it was just a bad date. I'm almost flawless now when it comes to get a girl with me, but to get to this point I had to get through a lot of cringy, shitty dates. Looking back on them is always like "why did I do that/say that?", but it has to be that way. Learn from this shit OP, you've got this man.

You did kiss her. I was just using that kiss example as an analogy for lurkers as well.

You're doing pretty good though. I'm not sure how you run body language game, but have your arm around your shoulder or waist when she's laughing. Little by little. Sample that boyfriend material to them. Never ask for permission. It's always better to apologize. High risk = high rewards. Itll also save you time, incase shes a dub and yall ain't compatible. It'll be worth it once you find one that works itself long term

I think this is just a normal part of dating and people who focus on the right things and don‘t let bad experiences make them turn insecure or bitter are the ones who will prevail.

Now you just have to go through the usual process of digesting a rejecetion from a girl you cared about, of which I don‘t exepect you to handle it like it was nothing. You are going to be upset and you should approach this from a conscious and self aware perspective in which you know you will be in a shitty headspace for a while and that thoughts will arise that can question your self worth. That‘s all natural and a normal response. Just stay meta and distanced about it and don‘t identify with these thoughts because you are smart enough to know why they came to be and what they can do to you if you let them.

That aside I would advice you to date and fuck other girls even if you are not interested in them. That‘s just one of those things that you are (maybe) not in the mood to do but are actually good for you. Like working out for example. But it‘s still good for you. In this case for your mental well being, feeling confident and desirable.

>needing validation from women to this extent
never gonna make it

Well, I wrote about it here: I mean, maybe this sounds fucked up, but having Asperger's makes you feel a lot of pain in life. Plenty of rejection, failures at work and in school, wondering what you did wrong, ruined friendships, I've felt some pain in life. Even my own parents kicked me out when I was 21. So, knowing this girl had a disability kind of gave me the feeling of, "maybe she's on an equal playing field to me." Clearly I can still fuck it up even when that's true. If I compare me at 27 to me at 17, I'm a vastly different person. I don't think I ever managed to have sex with a girl through seduction and dating until I was 23, I literally paid escorts until then because I was so tired of failure and rejection and just really, really wanted to experience pussy. I still feel ashamed about it years later because I know literally every guy my own age was seducing girls in their teens and most men have never paid for pussy. And even the girl I seduced was low hanging fruit, to put it nicely. She dumped me pretty fast too.

Yeah, I'm trying to keep a healthy headspace... but I definitely desired her above the other women on my plate at the moment. Some of them are a bit chubbier than I prefer, some aren't the prettiest, some have weird personalities seemingly. I mean, I know I said she had cerebral palsy, but physically, just purely based on looks, she was the most attractive girl to me I've ever dated. Amazingly pretty, skinny, adorable smile, long dark silky hair. I feel a deep, stinging pain knowing that I probably had a chance with her and blew it. Going over to smash some of these more "easy" women just feels... lame. I don't feel like I'm forcing myself to lift, I enjoy doing it. When this girl invited me on a beach date, it was like my heart was soaring: a thin, Eurasian beauty wanted to go to the beach with me. I felt like a stud. Now... I'm really trying to keep telling myself I'm a stud and not a dud.

Do you look spergy or dress spergy in any wat? Maybe she and the woman in the restaurant took pity on you because of a good personality combined with looking like Chris chan

No, it was more like the woman in the restaurant was starting to look like she was wishing she was the one on the date with me. I was legitimately making both of them laugh. Also no I don't dress like Chris Chan lmfao.

I honestly think looks are the last of my problems. I can squat 235lbs, bench about 215lbs, I'm a decently strong guy with low body fat, deep voice and a handsome face. I dress very clean cut. Most of the time women tell me they think my looks or my voice are my most attractive features, or it was some joke or flirty comment I made that got them into me. And somehow, I always still blow it in the end.

Just to give perspective, this is what I look like. Probably a bad idea to post this on Jow Forums, but whatever. This girl was slim, mixed asian and white, had long dark hair and wore glasses; everyone I've shown her photo to comments that she's beautiful. I don't want to post a pic of her cause that's invasion of privacy, I can post my own self and deal with whatever consequences there are. This exact photo is actually what I used to meet her on a dating app as well as those other girls I've got hanging on the line. I already made plans to meet one up since, she said she wants to meet me at the beach, and maybe another this weekend who seems to mostly want a casual encounter... moving on would be the healthy thing to do.

Attached: pf selfie.jpg (663x1000, 198K)

Simple biology, she just found an alpha male that will improve her offspring by giving her superior alpha genes. While maybe you are a great guy but still not that alpha. Dont worry, there are millions of girls out there who will take your rejected dna.

Ha ha very funny. She told me she decided to give both of us a chance, and for whatever reason I blew it. After having what felt like the funnest date of my life. But I mean hey, I know there's other fish in the sea. It will just take a while for me to get that beauty out of my mind.

I remember another time I met this incredibly gorgeous Indian girl downtown; if this girl who I went out with today was the most gorgeous girl I ever dated, this girl is second gorgeous. Again she gave me a chance seemingly because of my looks and flirty texts, but whether it was something I said or did in person, I blew it.

Honestly, I think you should just improve your looks.Probably you are dating way beyond your league, try to lower your standards a bit, improve your looks, and you will find a good girl for you.
I have been in a relationship with a real cutie, almost model-like body(and she didnt even go to the gym, she just had really good genes), and super funny, but believe me, these women are the most demanding and will complain about nearly everything because they know they have the upper hand as they have one thousand guys behind them, while you dont have not even 100 girls behind you. You don't want them for long-term relationships

Do you really think I look that bad from this picture ? I'm usually quite confident in my appearance, it's my behaviour that is a source of insecurity since I'm so dumb in regards to socializing. I mean, I accept your judgement, but I'm already lifting and exercising regularly, already groom myself all the time keeping my head and beard trimmed and clean looking. Not really sure what else I could be doing to improve my appearance besides being able to afford expensive designer dress clothes or something and driving a nicer car.

And I do date less attractive women, but man... these pretty girls will fuck you up.

From what you're writing, it's really not you it's her. Girls can be stupid and complicated. Don't fall hostage to this (even if there are no bad intentions on her part, in this case she's insulting and abusing you).

May be you go too fast and they think you're the kind of guy who won't stay with her. Maybe you went too far out of yourself and sounded fake.

Maybe date better girls who don't act like 12 year olds?

That's it.

Im going to be completely honest, you look like a middle eastern adam sandler, which is not bad if you know how to play it out.
Try to smile more, go to your local gym, eat healthier, clothes also help, copy styles from other men on tv(it doesnt need to be adam sandler but since you look quite similar maybe i would suggest it, but not from his characters of course) that you know that work. Be assertive.
That will give you a lot of points

... i honestly do every one of those things. I mean you're not the first person to say I look like Adam Sandler, but you're telling me to go to the gym and eat healthy when that's what I've literally been doing for like a year or more. I mean, thanks for the advice, but it's not really helpful when that's already what I do and I know I could probably out-lift you unless you're a real heavy lifter. I'm IN the local gym in that picture.

You definitely didn't do anything wrong she is just not the one for you. Keeping trying and stay positive the right girl will come. But the fact you got so mad afterwards and it effected you that hard means you're not ready for a relationship yet. You don't need a girl for validation and to make yourself happy. Happiness comes from within and a relationship adds to that happiness.

It isn't your fault. This other guy just tickles her fancy more than you do. It could be a number of things:

>made himself less available
>more attractive
>higher social status
>funnier
>more intelligent
>more of a spark

You can't explain why you're naturally drawn to one person and not another. At least she was honest with you about how she felt and didn't lead you on until the other guy let her down.

Onto the next one, OP. Try not to let this dent your confidence.

Listen, it's not about lifting, but about looks. If you look at all Olympic heavy lifters, they look bulky, but not defined, whereas when you look at Olympic swimmers they are chiseled and ripped as a fucking greek god. Guess who the girls prefer and drop their panties for. If you lift heavy but you dont define abs, chest, and so on, it is useless, unless you want to win a medal at olympic heavy lifting

One thing that was really messed up, this girl described to me how, because of her cerebral palsy, she feels depressed. She can't find meaningful work, she works part time at a coffee shop like two days a week. She's an upgraded member on POF because she said she has a very difficult time finding dates. She literally told me about how she told a guy she was talking to on POF at one point that she wanted to kill herself, and the guy blocked her. All I could think was to try and tell her something about how everyone faces challenges, life is always worth living, she shouldn't feel that way because in time she could find something meaningful and work around her disability. But at the same time I thought... is someone like her really mentally ready for dating. And yet, the fact that she rejected me despite all of those hardships made me feel even worse. It was fucked up man, I can't stop replaying this conversation in my head that went down between us. Her describing her pain and depression, and the fact that she had no romantic interest in me was like... it felt like the worst rejection, ever. I wish she had just played along with it being a good date and blocked me or something.

I don't even know if she really likes the other guy more, she just said she wanted to give both of us a chance, and she was currently dating me.

Honestly I do feel ashamed of that part. I shouldn't have let it bother me that much. But it's just like... the compounded rejections over the years, and this huge one.

I'm pretty sure all those lifter dudes don't have much problem attracting women, since there are women who like those guys too. I don't really want to lose any strength in exchange for defined abdominals or whatever. I genuinely enjoy becoming stronger like it's a hobby or something, if it makes me more attractive to women that's like a bonus. I really do enjoy being strong.

Well you were the one complaining about why a girl friendzoned you. I was just suggesting that maybe this other guy has a more attractive physique

man, I went to fit for the first time in years.

it kind of weirded me out. Like maybe you're right, my own perspective of my body is out of whack. These dudes are lifting less than me, a lot of them are taller than me and weigh less than me. I feel like I still have so much further to go in terms of lifting, but I'm probably stronger than a lot of those guys outside of the powerlifters.

Just answer me this: would you date a strong woman or a sexy woman?. Because as far as im concerned most people date people who find sexy, unless you are Tormund

I think that might be the thing man. Somehow in my mind I convinced myself that strong = sexy. I mean, it is to an extent, but I guess it's probably time I stopped smoking weed and cigarettes completely (not that I do it much, but I do it) and try some cardio or something.

But I mean, idk man. I just get a kick out of lifting harder and harder. Some people do drugs, I do two plates going up to three. it's weird, like I'll go lift hard and just come home and play nintendo switch games in bed and feel like less of a loser cause at least i'm strong. And the fact is some fat is needed for lifting hard, but maybe I could trim it down and try to build up my cardio ability.

> I looked her straight in the eyes, holding her hands, and said something like "______, I know I shouldn't kiss you but, I just, I........" And just held her hands awkwardly, feeling frustrated

this is bait right

Dude... she just told me she didn't want me. She asked if we could just be friends, after what felt like the best date of my life. She even said she didn't really enjoy the kiss I gave her, even though I felt like she 100% wanted it and she smiled back in the moment. I really wanted to kiss her, but I don't want to force a kiss onto someone. I was all mentally fucked up and sounded dumb and corny as shit.

You are being too hard on yourself OP and it rarely comes down to one thing you say or do thats positive or negative and it damn sure isn't because you asked. In fact you asking and she being honest was the best for both of you. Bottom line. She liked another guy already but accepted a date with you and still likes him after the date.

Dude... she didn't accept a date from me. She asked me on a date. I fucked up. The weather fucked up when it rained all over us and I didn't get to see her in a swimsuit. We didn't get to swim together. I was literally handing her a towel to dry up her feet and shoes, within the first 10 minutes of what ended up being a 6 hour date. It was bad luck. I fucked up. I had a chance, I fucked it up. I just know it's because I asked, I shouldn't have fucking asked.

We were literally planning out trying the beach date again next Saturday, or traveling up North together. Then me, being so confident that she liked me like I liked her, asked what it was she liked about me. I expected to get complimented. Instead I fucked up everything. I'm just out here kinda feeling cursed. Kinda feeling like Aubrey on 'Jaded'. Seriously, go listen to that song: one of the best Drake songs of all-time, where he's Aubrey instead of being Drake. It will make sense when you listen.

Ay man stop posting about your boring ass life. I remember your thread about how much you love eurasians, all giddy about going on this date. Here's the problem: you are completely insufferable. Stop being a whiny self-involved bitch who listens to Drake and posts pictures of Drake and talks about Drake and tells people to listen to Drake songs in order to express yourself. It's not attractive, it's not masculine, it's not going to get you laid. I don't care what else people tell you, this is what you need to hear. You are too much. You try too goddamn hard. Tone it way the fuck down. Don't be flamboyantly funny, you aren't her personal comedian for the night. Don't sing gay ass songs to her, it will absolutely dessicate her pussy. Internalise your shit my nigga, grow a skin, keep your feelings where they belong, inside you, off this board. Grow up a little.
If I see your shit here again I will remind you, now get the fuck outta here

Attached: 13079466723s.gif (125x87, 860K)

Op maybe you're too mature for the women you date. Or maybe you're too unattractive physically

This is my go to quote for that. "If I love you, what business is it of yours?" It doesn't matter to me why someone like me and it shouldn't matter to them why I like them

I fucking like you. I am the same way, just about a decade behind you in the social skills improvement process

It doesn't matter if she asked or not there was a lead up, she wasn't doing anything so asked you. Being serious. It wasn't something you did on one date and it wasn't because you asked. The only thing you are guilty of is misinterpreting her romantic interest during the date. Like I said. Her mind and heart is with another man and you or any other guy is just a diversion. She can have fun, enjoy your company and even like you but only as a friend. She wants another guy.

no, he's not mature enough. hes like a 7 grade boy with a crush on a girl that speaks to him so he passes her a note that asks do you like me yes or no all the while knowing she likes some other guy that sits in front of her

Hmm, maybe she unconsciously sensed you were an unstable mentally fucked up chump, and her female instinct told her to back the fuck off.

Sort yourself out man, this reaction is important.

Oh indian trash nvm lol

Honestly I think this might be the realest answer. Like obviously I'm fucked up mentally if this fucked with my head this much and made me feel this unable to think straight. I mean, at this point I'm just trying to message other women and will see someone else tomorrow, but still. Maybe I need therapy or to read a self-help book or some shit, I don't know. But I do realize how retarded it was for me to get so upset and bothered. This girl I actually liked compared to other girls I've dated where I didn't give a damn about them letting me go or wanting to meet again or whatever.

Are you 17 or so? I was so goddamn awkward and retarded at that age. I'd have girls ask me out and then scare them away with my own retardation. It took me so long to learn how to not be completely awkward and weird to people, and I'm still learning. I pretty much think my social skills were so stunted I was like a dumb kid, clearly I still have issues with being mature. You have to not give up hope that you can improve over time.

Look at this video to learn how to
properly meet, banter and court a woman:

youtube.com/watch?v=I66aySW4le8

You're welcome.

Attached: Richard%22Jaws%22Kiel.jpg (255x306, 13K)