Do nice guys really come last with girls? Was in a relationship with gf and more or less did everything for her...

Do nice guys really come last with girls? Was in a relationship with gf and more or less did everything for her..she ended up fucking me over. So I became jaded and starting treating girls like i didnt give a shit..having sex then making them leave ar 3am..ignoring texts for days etc. 90 per cent of them go crazy for me when i treat them like this ("why are you treating me like this I love you etc etc")..so is it true do girls like assholes and hate nice guys?

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There's a line between treating a girl good, and being a doormat, and basically just bending over backwards for her at all times.

This
Trest a girl well, but put her in her place when she starts some of that hysterical woman shit.
It will make a woman respect you.

Yeah i probably didnt explain it very well..i wasnt a doormat ..but i was 100 per cent loyal..always there for her when she needed help etc..not a wimpy doormat but definitely a"nice guy" and got fucked over after a year and a half

nah, the girl that fucked you over was just a bitch. now you’re treating nice girls who aren’t bitches like shit, pushing them away and denying yourself the possibility of findig real love and happiness with one of them. congrats.

No, but people like a challenge. Guys are the same way. If it is TOO easy, if there is no risk, nothing left to work for, no space to move forward, attraction stagnates and dies.

You don't have to be an asshole to be "challenging." You just have to have high standards and don't give total love & devotion so easily. You should have other priorities, responsibilities, passions & obligations in your life. She will always want your full, undivided attention if it feels like it's always JUST out of reach. But you can't just fake it. You shouldn't just play games and act cold & distant to manipulate her into feeling a certain way.

That will be more attractive than being a total doormat, yes. But it's still not good, it's certainly very far from the most attractive or desirable kind of guy. It's like you've gotten yourself up from 5% to 15%. Aim higher.

What makes a man go into top tier then?
Not OP, but dating a girl now and things are going really fast. 5 times we seen each other and starting to act really cute over text and saying babe sometimes.

Thing is tho...i don't know if there is such a thing as a "nice girl"...i've looked into it and everybody seems to say that women are way more ruthless than men and that once they get bored or some guy comes along that can offer them something you cant anymore tbey will fuck over the best most loyal guy. That's why I have become jaded

It's not true. You had a bad experience and now apply that to all women. These threads are getting boring.

Absolute highest tier is a genuinely decent, kind, loving man, who is strong-willed and independent and self-sufficient. The kind of guy who would be perfectly fine taking care of himself, who does things in his life that he genuinely cares about and tries to do as well as he can. A "hero," basically. That is the kind of guy that women want to get close to. He's not distant because he's jaded or playing mind games - he's occasionally distant because he genuinely has other shit to do.

I don't play games at all..i literally just don't give a fuck..when i say i ask them to leave or don't text..i'm not manipulating or putting on an asshole act..i just stopped giving a shit about being the nice guy..suddenly they all want me

It’s not true. I’m a girl and I am in love with a guy like you and it hurts. I hate that other girls hurt him and made him this way and I wish more than anything that I could have met him before he started feeling the way he does now about women. He’s the light of my life. I don’t know what I can do to prove that I really love him and that I’m not like the ex who fucked him over.

All that sounds goid in theory ..but i really don't think it's true mate. I have always had my own life independence interests etc...but i have never found myself more attatractive to women as i do when i simply stop giving a fuck and act completely aloof. And I'm talking a whole range of women here

yeah but you don't get what I'm saying. They want you MORE now than before, because you're not making it easy for them. But you can't have a healthy, positive relationship this way. you're still miles and miles away from doing well with women.

this might sound cynical, but think of it almost like a video game. If it's way, way too easy to beat the entire game, it's boring, and you won't have much interest in continuing to play when you've already beaten it with no effort. That's what you were before. Now, you're like a video game where it's not even possible to get past the first level. So these girls will take a little while to give it their best shot, see if they can play well enough to move forward. It seems like a challenge and they want to know if they're good enough to beat it. But they will eventually realize that it's designed to be impossible, they can't win, it's not even fucking fun to play, and they will get frustrated and throw the game away and tell everyone they know that you're a shitty game that shouldn't be played.

what everyone really wants is a game that makes sense, that is actually enjoyable to play, where you can learn & move forward and get better at it, but the game gets more challenging and difficult as it goes. the kind of game where it's going to be really fucking difficult to get to the last level and "win," but you want to, because you're having a really good time trying to get there.

You get me?

I'm starting too lol..that was a good analogy. Can I ask is this something you had to work through yourself with women? I am assuming you are a guy?

yes I am, and yes it is. and a big part of it is understanding that it's not a bad thing, it's just human, you're actually probably the same way with women. If a girl throws herself at you and gets clingy way too easily, you don't take her seriously, you want to get away. Whereas you got so hung up and fucked-up over your ex because you wanted her, but she got distant and pulled away and you couldn't figure it out. Right?

Thing that has made me jaded tho is that i wasn't a complete doormat in that relationship..i was just what i would call a decent caring guy..i always stood my ground and wasn't a wimp. But i was "nice"..maybe i just ran into the wrong person?

Yep..funny thing is now she wants me back..but the trust is shattered

Maybe you did. Relationships can end for all kinds of reasons, it's not always because you did something wrong. I know even less than you do about what happened w/ you and your ex. I'm just saying that you're not coming to the right conclusion by saying "girls just want assholes who treat them like shit." Some girls do get attracted to that, they want to think they're good enough to break through and "fix you," but it's not stable, it's not positive, it's not even good for you. I'd have to assume that you're not feeling great about yourself or your life right now, even if you're getting attention from girls

it's normal to get a bit cynical after you get hurt like that. but if you let yourself go TOO far you can't always come back again

I think i get the point..if you act like an "asshole" or "bad boy" etc..girls will have a strong initial attraction..but in the long run it is not a healthy situation for you or them? And you are ruining chance of meaningful relationship because you have been hurt before being the "nice guy"?

I'm feeling good about my life but very confused about how women operate atm lol

You can't really say for sure whether or not these other girls aren't bitches, pal. Actually them being into op still suggests they are.

Yeah exactly. Too much of that kind of behavior will make you too cynical about women, and you're just not really giving yourself the full picture.an you can get a bad reputation, like the male version of a "slut," so that the kinds of women that are really worth your time won't trust you or take you seriously

Cope and whore mental gymnastics

What does that even mean?

They will initially react because they don't understand why you're being a prick. Essentially, they've opened up to you, allowed themselves to be intimate or close to you, then you do a complete 180 and ignore them. It isn't the cuntishness they're attracted to, it's the need for closure or some kind of explanation so they don't feel like shit.

It's a common misconception that decent women look for assholes. Most women just want somebody who they get along with, find attractive and can have a decent life with. Trashy girls with daddy issues might be more into the abusive type, but it isn't really the case for most normal women.

So yeah, you might get a feeling of superiority when they're blowing up your phone trying to get a response, but it isn't an indication that they're just desperate for a guy to treat them like shit. They just want answers and to not feel like they've been used.