"The Red Pill" is deep inside my mind and it's hard to get out. Should I even try to get it out...

Jeez, I was just reading up on Jonestown the other day. How about that shit?

Your biggest error is in assuming that women are a group and are all attracted to one kind of guy. Each woman is a person with her own personality and compatibility. The more you obsess about The Red Pill, the further from reality you will go. Women have enough crazy, hyper-masculine guys with mood swings from their forced stoicism in their lives. Be a real person. Figure out who you are, develop confidence from that not from an ideal you're forcing, figure out the kind of person you want to hook up with, and go from there.

This is a very fair point. But for the past several months I've been on a Red Pill "detox", I don't watch the videos, browse that subreddit or read any more "manosphere" blogs. However, when I look around me, I tend to see what I've already read online: women like men taller than them, women like athletic guys, women get hung up on dudes who are emotionally distant and seem to care about her much less than she cares about. Maybe not in every case, but it happens often enough that I get insecure, thinking that maybe the women who don't have the "alphas" aren't as happy as they could be and are more likely to cheat.

>By that I mean, I wonder if you're being too hard on yourself. There must be something about you to make you likable.
Oh, subjectively, sure, there’s plenty to like. But if you look at me through an objective lens, which is how the whole redpill thing at least purports itself to work, I’m subhuman except for the fact that I have a law license. Sometimes people who I tell this latch onto that as being some high class sign of superiority. And, I’ll admit, being a professional sounds cool, and it does get you a leg up with women. But it doesn’t seal the deal. At best, it makes up the difference between short, fat me and tall, fit nonlaywers. And that’s at best.
My point in the end honestly is that you don’t have to have some unobtainable trait just to get a girlfriend. Confidence is a big part of it, to be sure, but how you get there isn’t through shit you don’t have. If anything, focusing on what you can’t get, or can only get by changing yourself fundamentally, is going to destroy your confidence.

>Still, if you're introverted, is that legitimately a turn off for people? Are women more likely to get bored or annoyed with you if you're not "on" all the time?
Not really. You know women can be introverted too? If you follow the “energy” theory it stands to reason they’ll want time to themselves. That ought to suck for extroverts who are “on” all the time, right?

The funny thing is, as an introvert, I’ve tended to have more luck with extroverts. I think they like that I’m a good sounding board for ideas and theories. Like that I’ll just listen, think, and give a thoughtful response. And they don’t get that with extroverted men.

>or can only get by changing yourself fundamentally, is going to destroy your confidence
What if the fundamental changes are necessary to get what you want? Do you resign yourself to being a dateless virgin?

Agreed. Don't force it because it's not you. Surely you have some sort of humor. Personally for me I'm sarcastic, but it's a very dry sarcasm so most people I meet can't ever tell if I'm serious or not without getting to know me more. Usually this causes most people to not be interested in me, which is fine, because I know that it's a good filter to find people I can get along with much better. There's no reason to be everyones friend or try to sleep with every woman you find attractive. I'm also an introvert, and I'm happy having a few meaningful friendships than having a bunch of people I call friends but can't count on. The people in my life also know how introverted I am so it's nothing personal if I turn them down or don't talk to them for a while. I think the core idea of redpill gets lost. I understand it to be the pursuit of a fruitful life through self-improvement. It seems that so many people get hung up on the women aspect of it, but I think the crux of it is that these men that get cheated on and divorced raped wouldn't be with the women they're with if they had a very fulfilling life. They wouldn't put up with the bullshit their wives/gfs throw at them, and they wouldn't lose the respect of their woman or be seen as easy to walk all over.

If we’re just talking about a gf, wife, romantic success, etc., odds are you don’t need fundamental changes. If you’re talking about winning over a particular woman who has rejected you, then you would have better luck finding someone else.

You're seeing what you want to believe, OP. Yes, these women exist but you're living with blinders on. All you see are the women that embody the true essence of your insecurity and meanwhile, outside of the scope of your ideals there are millions upon millions of regular, average people in meaningful relationships. I'm sure you understand on some level that MOST people aren't athletic or tall or rich. Most people, user, are just like you; half-assing their way through this life just trying to eek out a living and find some kind of fulfillment in the process. You seem to think that all of these people have something you don't yet what you don't realize is that everybody, on some level, is insecure about something that they don't think they have. The women you're talking about a very specific kind of woman. You're completely missing the forest of the trees. You're focusing in on a specific population of people and nothing else. I understand this is difficult for you to grasp, especially as you have no point of reference to compare your experience to but I can promise you that outside the confines of Redpill test groups there people living their lives completely unaware and unphased by the patterns that you speak of.

>All you see are the women that embody the true essence of your insecurity and meanwhile, outside of the scope of your ideals there are millions upon millions of regular, average people in meaningful relationships. I'm sure you understand on some level that MOST people aren't athletic or tall or rich.
This is what fucked me up for YEARS. The funny part was when I reached my late 20s, I finally got my unicorn girl: Smart, graduate degree, sexually freaky in the ways I wanted, would have many kids, came from money and had a successful career, and above all loved me. She was a fucking wreck of a person. I realized how silly I’d been, chasing that all along. I found a much more normal girl later and have been happy as a clam since.

Yeah, I can make people laugh among other things, I've even had women show interest, it's just that it never lasts, and I feel like something must be wrong with me for them to lose interest so quickly. Last woman I was seeing for weeks before she went ghost. Oh well.

I agree with substance over quanitity.

This is true

I wanted to think this was true hence why I made the thread. It definitely feels like I'm seeing things through a "red pill lens" which is supposed to be good for me, but it's not. The other user is right, it's just fucking me up because I have pre-existing anxiety and insecurity.

The red pill is a cozy lie enacted by cowards who refuse to improve and accept failure as that process.

this. work on yourself and youll be better than at least 70% of men.

work out, eat right, stand up straight and you can push yourself to a 7-8/10 from a 5 or 6

>I find myself looking at guys and constantly judging whether or not they get laid or have anyone.

that's not red pill to care about other guys.

most of TRP is just basic self improvement and things that are obvious to non-aspergers normies, like women desiring guys who take care of themselves, are confident, and show leadership qualities. also that the world is competitive and will try to chew you up and spit you out.

people are confusing black pill with red pill ITT. black pill is the one that basically you can't improve and you're born with your looks and you can't change your conditions. red pill is very improvement and goal oriented

>All Women Are Hypergamous Whores that only care about looks money and status

To many people that's the true red pill. I'm not saying it's right but that's how many of them view things. Whether or not you can improve doesnt matter if the whole outlook is that you have to be perfect before anyone likes you.

Your pre existing anxiety and insecurity is precisely what attracts you to this ideology, user. I can promise you that. The greatest, most deeply ingrained human fear is being unworthy of love; being alone. Your fear of this drives you. Your entire life; your habits, your mannerisms, your beliefs and anxieties revolve solely around you being terrified of not being worthy of love. Obviously, the only thing worse in your mind than not being worthy is finding that love then having it taken away from you. I think you're slowly coming to the realization that you can't let fear run your life; you can't live with blinders on and avoid the real issue. I think you and I both know the real issue isn't women. You and I both know that women aren't what triggered your anxiety. Women are merely a surrogate for that anxiety. Women and the role they play in your life merely represent everything you fear and everything you dislike about yourself. You look at a woman and look at her life and the only thing you can see is the things that you lack. This redpill lens has done more harm to you than good. You know this. Now that you know this I think its time to do something about it. I'm not promising that at the end of this road is a 10/10 blone, virgin supermodel. All I can say with a fair amount of confidence is that most of the population has the same exact fears you do. Most people, men and women, just want to be loved. The just want the same things you do and if you can manage to break down the barriers that has been preventing you from seeing that everyone else's innards are roughly the same as yours you might find someone you really connect with.

Thanks for the long post user, really appreciate you taking the time for it.