ITT: Ask The Opposite Gender Anything

Mate of he could get her to see him in person this wouldn't be an issue.

Why is this board so obsessed with the evils of texting? It's more expected than not and as long as you know what you're doing there's nothing wrong with it.

How old is he? I think I'm reaching that point.

Girls, non virgins in particular, how do you feel about being a guy's first? And what would you want him to do on his first attempt?

I'm 20 and he is 25. I think he might be a virgin because when I asked him if he is he just dodged the question.

Yeah fair bet then. Some guys also just have low sex drives. I know women like to talk shit about how guys only want sex and stuff but strictly speaking we have as wide a range of libidos as you guys do.

You do also get an effect where, if he is a virgin, the longer you go without the less your body asks for it, kind of like a forced libido reduction. It may also be the case that he wants to escalate but isn't sure how/doesn't know that he needs to be the one to do it, that cuddling doesn't just suddenly become sex without someone pushing.

That said, don't push him. I was a late bloomer too, lost mine at 21 and allowed myself to be pressure into it in a "fuck me or we're over" sort of situation and it scarred the ever loving fuck out of me. You can prod him in that direction if you like but if he says anything that makes you think he's not ready yet just leave it and don't push.

But I'm horny as fuck especially when I'm cuddling with him

I promise you that if you push him and he's nervous you're going to scar him and he'll never want to touch you again.

Take his hand and shove it down your pants if you want but be careful where and how you apply pressure to get actual sex.

Fuck it, i'm going for it.

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Just be cool man.
>oh hey I swapped a shift with someone so I've actually got saturday off now if you want to come over then

Fuck I hate stoners.

>start talking to girl because we're doing a group project together
>she seems very interested in me
>laughs at my shitty jokes, touches me, smiles at me, etc
>ask for her instagram and we start following eachother
>find out she's really into kpop so i lose interest and never slide in her DMs
>randomly unfollows me a month later
Why? I don't think I ever did or posted anything that would piss her off.

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Why live if I’ll never have a gf?

Boyfriend recently got laid off from his job and he's really depressed. What do I do to get him back on his feet before he spirals back into doing nothing again?
Acting empathetic and understanding isn't helping him.

She lost interest in you too.

Women.

Is it true that y'all commonly enjoy "being pursued"? For years, I've thought that someone not making the first move or not really reciprocating signs was a signal that they weren't interested, and am just now learning that apparently that is not at all how this works.

Is what I'm hearing accurate at all?

Women: How would you feel if you saw a guy from an online dating site, in real life? Namely guys you aren't interested in.

To set the record straight, I am NOT a stalker, nor would I ever consider doing such a thing. I am, however, terribly afraid of being mistaken for one. I can handle rejection just fine.

If you're not sure what I'm talking about, here's a greentext scenario:
>search for local singles (emphasis on LOCAL) on an online dating site (POF, OkCupid, Tinder, etc.)
>message a girl
>she ignores/blocks/ghosts me or tells me off
>fair enough, move on
>take a break from the computer/smartphone
>go shopping at the mall, pick up some milk at the grocery store, pick up a package at the post office, etc.
>basically any place with a decent amount of traffic
>happen to see that very same girl there
>optional: she works there
>I notice her
>she may or may not notice me
>ohshitohshitohshit
What would be the correct thing to do? I probably shouldn't talk to her, but how do I carry out adequate damage control?

How do i know if i should 'make a move'. Im a pretty emotionally dense and awkward guy, i dont really pick up on hints well.

The last thing i had with this girl blew up in my face since i apparently made it too awkward when she was coming onto me, rather not do that again. Going out with this girl soon and dont wanna cock it up.

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Girls almost never initiate but they will show signs of liking you to get you to pursue them. Pursuing a girl who doesn't want you is not going to get you anywhere, but if she flirts back or shows other little signs (girls don't use big signs because they mistakenly believe that their subtle hints are already obvious hints) you can try pursuing her.

>blew up in my face since i apparently made it too awkward
I don't believe this

I know I'm overthinking this but I need someone's opinion.

So I was with gf today, we went to get tea around 9pm I had some cool stuff to show her and I was planning a date with her for Saturday. Anyway, I was drinking tea and the last sip of tea had too much sugar because I didn't mix it, and I felt like I was gonna throw up (that was on the street, once I left the store). I tried to hold it I couldn't I was able to not make a mess and managed to just throw up in the cup I had (I had moved away from her). I had some mint on me, so that was good. I apologized that she had to see me like that couple of times and brushed it off. Now I'm home, talking to her, should I apologize again or just... ignore it!

are all strippers cheating whores?

Idk m8 that seems pretty funny I dont think she would mind

As a fellow dude who has been in similarly embarrassing situations (and sometimes even WORSE situations), talking about it too much is only going to exacerbate it. Live with the immense shame, and never bring it up again.

And since this chick is already your girlfriend, she'll probably be more understanding than other people.

>Acting empathetic and understanding isn't helping him.
Be strict and demanding then. Sometimes a guy needs ye olde whip to get his ass back into shape.

it lasted a few days so yeah m8. never kissed a girl before and i guess she was making it too obvious infront of her friends. went on one more date and she ghosted me, heard later from some friends why.

Females, at what age are most of the women around you comfortable with getting pregnant, having children, and settling down? Mid to late 20's at the minimum?

>immense shame
Oh man, I didn't think it was that big of a deal, I really kept it clean and shit!

From a guy who has done online dating:

1.) They probably don't recognize you
2.) Even if they do, it'll be a "Huh... is that...that's a coincidence..." and then you either say an awkward hello, or pretty much pretend like you didn't recognize them, in nearly exactly the same awkward way that happens when you bump in to someone from high school you didn't really know or like.

UNLESS: You freak out and act like a spaz. *then* you turn in to a stalker freak because you're now kinda acting like one.

I still don't understand what the problem is? She wanted you to kiss her and you didn't realise and this was somehow making it awkward for her in front of her friends?

Just look for signs. A girl who knows what she's doing will give you opportunities for that first kiss, and after the first kiss if she keeps going on dates with you then you have a green light to do it more.

A girl who goes out on a first date with you, and likes you (use your judgement/gut feeling) will be okay with a kiss toward the end of the night the majority of the time. A girl who wants a kiss may do one or more of the following:
>stare at your eyes and lips, alternating between the two
>stand/sit/position herself within easy kissing distance
>bite her bottom lip
>turn to face you during conversation lulls
>delay parting ways at the end of the night, standing around near her car chatting, suggesting another walk around the block, that kind of stuff
>create moments where a kiss would be natural by doing things such as not starting a new conversation topic as soon as another ends, or by creating "cinematic" moments where you're supposed to kiss her in the rain or against the backdrop of the city lights (yes they do this kind of weird shit and imagine they're in a romcom and the camera is doing a circular pan around you as you kiss and the music swells)

Things you should NEVER do:
>ask if you can kiss a girl
>ignore/miss too many of her attempts to bait you into kissing her

>reasons I've given up on dating: the post

Why would needing to read social cues make you give up on dating?

What would men think they found out their girlfriend wrote a lesbian erotic story where she is the dom and it was very graphic about the sex acts?

Because this particular subset of social cues is pretty much invisible to me.

I'd be a little weirded out but not terribly surprised.

Why can't I piece together words or sentences when talking to a girl I'm attracted to? Could I have aspergers or something? 21 btw

If you know what to look for it's not hard.

It's the world's worst kept secret that even straight girls like lesbian porn, I can't think I'd find it weird that you've written lesbian erotica. At least no weirder than that you write erotica in the first place.

You're just unaccustomed to it.

>If you know what to look for it's not hard.
Bruh I'm practically blind though. Asking a girl would be ideal if it weren't for the fact that it's a terrible idea.

I'm sure a girl can come alongng and give you her thoughts on this, but you're better off not kissing her than asking. No faster way to dry up a girls wells than to ask permission for that first kiss.

>What would men think they found out their girlfriend wrote a lesbian erotic story where she is the dom and it was very graphic about the sex acts?

I mean... My girlfriends had girlfriends before... so she's probably read/thought of/done those things before...

Wouldn't really give too much of a shit?

Do you feel she's sexually naughtier because she's done that?

I have posted couple of times here so maybe some of you will recognize my story.

So my gf and I have been together for 2 weeks. We are 23, I think she is a virgin.
I noticed that she is trying to avoid "the kiss" when I am dropping her off and stuff.
I kissed her on the cheek last week and she kinda pulled back, I texted her and told her we will move at her pace from now on, she thanked me for that.
She has told me she likes a lot couple of times, so I don't think she is on the fence about her feelings to me, but idk..

Anyway, here is the question, I want to know when will she be ready for me to make a move. I want to know if she IS a virgin, that way i will be more confident in moving slower, it will make sense you know. How can I ask about this stuff without appearing that I just care about having sex with her?
Another question, should I just not do this, and tell her something like "Hey, can I kiss you goodnight" when I am dropping her off?
I know that asking is a turn off, but considering these circumstances, I think it is the right thing to do!

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Women: Do you feel that the older you get, the lower your age preference gets?

I've met women who were like 23, and they absolutely refused to date guys who were even the slightest bit younger. So not even a 22-year old was acceptable to them.
Then I've met women who were over 28, and they were like "yeah, I'd date a 24-year old."

Met too many of them for it to be a coincidence.

absolutely not. he must be older.

After I blueballed my gf for nearly 2 months she was just happy that it worked.
Me cumming was very important to her.

Guys or girls, any help is appreciated.
I'll try and get straight to the point. My bf is a virgin, I'm not. We're probably going to have sex soon but there's something I wasn't expecting. His dick is absolutely huge, like the biggest I've ever seen by a large margin. To be honest I'm a little scared. If he's not careful I think he'd probably kill me with it. He's really sweet and gentle and even though I know he'd never do anything to hurt me I'm still pretty nervous. I'm already planning on taking the lead in bed, but that doesn't make me any less worried. Like if he were more experienced I'd probably be more comfortable because I'd know that he knows how to be gentler, but right now I feel like he's got a lethal weapon and neither of us know how to manage it.
Wat do?

Nah, I'm only 27 and a guy in early 20s would honestly seem like an absolute kid. As close to my own age as possible is best, maybe a year or two less max. But I suppose women who feel uncomfortable with aging might go for younger men to compensate.

bump, please help :((((

What are the issues with texting? Asking as someone who texts often.

Bigger dicks are usually softer. It'll probably compress to a more manageable size once it's inside you.

Do older women enjoy seeing young men spill spaghetti in general? I'm pretty awkward and something I've noticed recently is older women smiling at if I'm struggling to communicate something, especially a complex topic, like laplace transforms, Hellenistic spice trade, arc welding, or whatever. This never happens with men; I don't think it's sexual in any way

iGirl. You'll be fine. Just tell him to stop if it hurts. your vagina was made to take dick desu.

lel

What if a guy was actually one day younger than you, but he was otherwise decent?

What if a guy was technically born a day later than you due to time zone differences, but is actually physically older than you? (example: He was born on January 2nd, 12:00 AM in New York, but you were born on January 1st, 10:00 PM in California)

Girls who are into you and still reluctant to kiss have been watching too many romcoms. They're waiting for that "on the beach during sunset" moment. Especially if she's a virgin. Make it happen, take her on a over the top romantic date and then see if she's up to it.
I would advice against asking about her virginity, unless it comes up naturally. You will probably seem like a fetishist or she might freak out and get insecure, thinking she's doing something wrong or that you're growing impatient. At least wait until you get more physical, then just say something like
>"I've noticed you're a bit hesitant. You ever done this before? It's cool, we'll go slow"
Or whatever and see how she responds. If she feels comfortable with you, she'll tell you. And if she isn't, then you won't get to tap that anyway, so why worry.

>Do you feel she's sexually naughtier because she's done that?

Uhh... Not really? Don't really see how they're related.... Erotica and actual sex have about as much to do with one another as real sex and porn do... which is to say... not much at all....

And having actually been with a couple gay girls trying straight sex... gay girl sex does not at all really translate to straight sex..

So... No. To be honest, we've been together long enough where that shit doesn't even really register unless it randomly comes up like now.

>the same guy who has been asking about having a big dick is finally pretending to be a girl to get replies

Dont use the same phraseology if you don't want to be caught doing stuff like this user. Get your gf first then worry about the dick size thing.

It's cute as fuck. My mother has always done it and the older I get the more I notice that I do the same. And you're right, it's not sexual. It's more like some kind of a maternal "you can do it, little ducking, I'm rooting for you" type of thing. If you have an older woman in your life who does that regularly, then you can trust that she's got your back, if you ever need help with anything. She's been completely wooed by your awkward antics. Good for you.

How the fuck are we supposed to know when she'll be ready?

Asking all women: If I say "bitch lasagna" to you in an electronic message, without any additional context, would you understand the reference?

>Just tell him to stop if it hurts.
I don't want to make him feel bad though.

>you'll be fine
I don't know. There've been times just putting tampons in has hurt.

no

Not everyone is in the same culture of internet as you, it is likely that they would understand, but there is a large probably they won't

You need to talk with her about it. Only she knows. Don't sorry about the asking of it ruining the romanticism, it doesn't. You can also just ask her if she's a virgin. Your concern about being percieved as solely interested in sex is valid, but again, it's not that hard to explain to her that you aren't that shallow

Yoo this is very helpful! We're watching a movie this weekend in a very fucking fancy movie theater, it has like pods, and the chair recline into a what feels like a bed, waiters come in and get you food, we will probably be cuddling all the while.
Do you think this is romantic enough? I can wait for a romance scene or something, hold her hand, look her in the eye then reach for her face.

If not, I am thinking we will have time to go to Barnes and Noble, I will make her start looking at books, I will pick a romantic poem and read it to her, then maybe I can make a move then?

That was not my question retard, I was asking if I should ask her, or just go with the flow if I feel the moment is right.
And if I should ask her, how do I ask her without looking like I am only in it for the sex?

Not really, is she usually busy? If so then your question is valid.
I guess in the future you could have said "I am free on this day and this day, let me know when you're free and I will plan it out"

That way you're showing imitative, and making sure she is available.

But I think she just backed out because she doesn't want to smoke!

Lube, foreplay, and take it slow. Basically pretend you're a virgin again. Have a look at r/bigdickproblems too, they're a sub pretty much dedicated to your problem. Relax too. That's super important.

Communication is vital to every relationship. But if you're that worried about his feelings then try and make it sexy. Say something like "ooh I just can't take your huge cock" Every guy loves to have his ego stroked, sometimes more than anything else.

26 m alone in NYC, where to meet friends and a potential gf? I'm not a drinker, unemployed, kissless virgin, eastern asian.

Ehhhhh. Explain a little more please. What do you mean by that?

>Eastern Asian
Chinese, Japanese, Korean, or Taiwanese? If Japanese or Korean, your chances are better.
If you're willing to wait, go visit the next anime/sci-fi/comic convention. Asian dudes can get a fair bit of puss at those places.

>not a drinker
That's okay.

>kissless virgin
Even that's okay up to a certain point.

>unemployed
Nope. No go. Unless you are a student or a god at investing, this is unacceptable to 99.9% of women.

>26 years old
>unemployed
Yeah, that'll be a hard pass for any girl worth dating.

Why does my older sister claim to hate it when I squeeze her, but always seems disappointed and hurt if I don't squeeze her when I see her?

lol this is cute, ages?

Are you my brother?

22 and 24
Perhaps

You're not my brother, we're 23 and 26. I miss him now though

Ha! Gay.

I'm sorry you don't have a brother to love.

I have a sister that I love but I'm not gunna hug her that's for gays.

Why do girls message first and then stop? What's the point of even messaging then if they're just going to end it after 2-3 texts? It's not like I'm saying anything offensive or anything all I do is continue the conversation. I can talk to people fine in person but apparently I'm a shitty texter.

What platform are we talking about? How did you meet these girls? What are you saying to them in those messages?

Maybe the conversation's ended after 2-3 texts.

>It's not like I'm saying anything offensive
I don't know how you're conducting yourself, but if you avoid stepping on toes or you're just walking around eggshells, that might come off as a little boring in a conversation. A little controversy never hurts.

One of the best conversation jokes I've had with a girl included a joke about abortion.

>Tinder

>Random matches, keep in mind I'm only talking about girls that message me first. I can understand the other way around but they made the effort to contact me.

>Depends on the text. They might send a jokey line or something or ask me about my music taste or whatever and I send something related to what they said. I avoid pick up lines or any bs like that unless it's explicitly clear.

They only respond if I respond in like 5 minutes, if I wait like a half hour I usually get ghosted and never messaged back again. I'm not on my phone 24/7, is that the issue here?

I try to ask them a question to keep it going or say some one liner related to what they last said so idk

> if I wait like a half hour I usually get ghosted and never messaged back again.

this makes me sound like I give up after a half hour, no I mean like they dont message again even after days.

You play it too safe probably.

A: your one liners prob suck
B: girls have options on there and get bored if you dont give them enough attention or you get lost in the shuffle
C: you're scared of getting flirty/sexual when that's what they probably want
D: the girls are just messing with you or doing it for vanity

If you havin drunk sex and you pass out inside a bitch can the pussy juice burn your dick? Heard that shits can bleach they panties, don't wanna wake up with a Freddy Krueger lookin dick.

how do I know if someone's avoiding mey don't want to ruin their ldr?
he always seems to be ecstatic when I see him and we hug really tightly for extended amounts of time
he also likes to give me headrubs spontaneously and rests his head on my shoulder but when he does, I freeze up and don't reciprocate
recently he's been out of meds and said he's really drained but it's been over a week now and avoids the question when I ask how he's feeling
what could explain this?
am I reading too much into it?

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So how do you stand out from the crowd or get flirty without being autistic?

I play it about as conservative as possible. If I start the convo I usually message about something in their bio. I don't do the jokes or hot button debates, I just ask questions and stuff to get to know them.

Thanks, I guess I knew deep down that was the big issue. I'll try harder to remedy it.