Going to the US on holiday, meeting gf's family for Christmas

I've got no clue what the us is actually like, I'm meeting my gf's family for Christmas and I've got no clue what American customs are I'm not shitting brick but I'm not exactly comfortable either...

I have no idea what to expect.

Attached: 175px-Britfag.jpg (175x163, 8K)

Not gonna lie I'm half expecting the gun on the able "hurt my daughter" shit

where you from dude?

The UK

Say tally ho every time you leave the room. Make them think it's normal. This is your chance.

Kek, my first gf's dad did this to me. Later that night I fucked his daughter under the slide at the park.

I accept my mission

Well, where does she live?

God bless user, as a britfag myself you are doing Philip's work.

Where in America?

My wife’s dad tried that shit with an AR-15 and I embarrassed him by just ripping into stupid and reckless it was

Why do you always see american girls with british guys? That stupid accent is some kind of pussy-mind control shit

well girls usually have daddy issues so when they see a semblance of their (founding) fathers their cooches go wild

Shake hands with people to gain their respect. Learn about american football, it will come up in topic. There will also be booze, don't get drunk.

Basically just don’t do anything stupid.
Learn enough about her parents to bring a table conversation back from the dead.
If politics comes up, play stupid... seriously, do not enter that conversation with an opinion.

>he thinks America is one culture
Nigga unless you tell us what region you're going to, we can't help you. California and Kentucky might as well be different countries.

America is a bunch of different cultures and advice can't be easily generalized. What state is her family in?

America is a vast land with countless peoples

Of where do you wish to know our lore?

Im betting one internet his girl is from either san diego or upstate ny.

Try to get a private conversation with her father. Tell him
>oobie woobie doobie

He'll know what it means.

Don't gawk at the guns, or they will laugh at you. Firm handshake. Bring a small housewarming gift on your first visit to the house.

Why do you always pick on Kentucky? We fought with the Union for pete's sake. If you're going to talk shit about a state talk about Alabama or Georgia, those are some scummy places.

I was shit-talking California.

Figure out a way to say the word "garage" out loud. They'll think it's hilarious.

Whatever you do, don't call her father's truck a "lorrey". He'll fly into a rage and start throwing tea into the harbor.

... I don't think you know what a lorry is user.

Pretend like you have never actually seen a gun and don't know what a gun is. It'll be great.

>muh based niggers

user come back & let us know the state she’s in. Can be of a lot more help if we know the culture of the state she’s from.


Philip help me.