Ask the opposite gender

Personally, I don't think it's fair to judge. If you've never eaten dog, you'd never be able to appreciate the silky texture of a properly tenderized hound.

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It does taste good.

Why do girls always say they're more socialized to be ashamed of their sexuality than guys? I know this sounds like an incel-bait question, but as far as I can see it's almost the exact the opposite of reality.
Like I can get in trouble just for it looking like I *might* have a boner at my job, so I honestly want to understand how girls could have it worse.

I don't know, it's awfully strange considering that 90% of their clothing is skin tight, leaves nothing to the imagination, and shows cleavage like it's going out of style. BUT HEY, WE JUST HAVE TO HAVE EVERYTHING, I GUESS! JUST DON'T FUCKING LOOK AT OUR PRACTICALLY NAKED SILHOUETTES GUIZ, OR WE'LL SEND YOU TO PRISON!

fuck.

stupid women and their "oh but it shouldn't matter! you just shouldn't do it!" that's not a fucking argument fuck you fuck the world fuck society, and then fuck you again.

Girls are attracted to me, but this didn't work out for me the way it should have, so I feel I feel a little bit afraid and when I notice it. How do I overcome this in a constructive, healthy way?

My gf broke up with me today.

I said “okay” and nothing else

She got like “just okay?” And “can we still be friends”, and now she begs me to meet her in person and talk it out. I don’t want this. Should I reply why not or just radio silence? I don’t want anything more to do with her desu. Thanks.

While I don't think I agree with the degree of woman hating in this post, the
>oh but it shouldn't matter! you just shouldn't do it!
mentality is exactly what I'm talking about. Like how the heck do women have it worse when we're actively told that being attracted to women, let alone ones dressed to be sexy, is an inherently bad thing that we shouldn't do?

Then just say no. She is probably pissed that you didn't care.

Also that's pretty shitty thing of her to do it over texts.

Why did you two break up?

Shut the fuck up

Radio silence. She wanted to see you mad, upset and sad. Don’t give them the satisfaction. Ghost like you’re hiding from the ghost busters, lol.

Have you ever dated anyone with a weird fetish?

We've been together for a month, should I get my GF a $100 boots? or is that too much?

beta

Define weird. There's lots of stuff I think is really weird but is apparently super common, and lots of stuff I think is normal but is apparently super weird.

So I asked this girl out today and she said yes enthusiastically. Told me to give her my number and I did.

She still hasn't texted me... should I be concerned or is she just trying to not seem too desperate?

Yeah I'm an idiot for not getting her number but I didn't think about it at the time.

Get ready for a long ghosting.

A date and a few flowers would be better. Don't go all out for 1 month. Just somewhere you both like and maybe a single rose or something.

Some women are too retarded to send "the first" text message (they literally just need to say hi). You're fucked.

Depends. If you're feeling petty you can just say
>honestly there's nothing to talk about I don't think, I felt like this has been coming and I actually agree that it's a good move to end things
And watch her stew on that.

How long ago was this? Girls freak out about coming across as desperate or needy too so if it's only been a few hours since you asked her don't be alarmed. You might not hear from her until tomorrow.

Should I “read” her messages or just leave it unread?

Girls:

Would you consider a cancer survivor (particularly in my case, a 21 year old male who no longer has a stomach) inferior to a man who isn't? It's taken a toll on my body and now I'm at 6' and 129 lbs.

I don't want any sympathy, just honesty.

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earlier today, I guess by the end of tomorrow is a reasonable expectation

Not a girl but at least you have a sense of humour.

I am a cancer survivor. Nearly killed me and I will never be 100% healthy again in my life, barring the advent of new treatments or meds, and it's not a problem for me. I put the weight back on, got into the gym a little bit, and eventually I came to the place I'm at now where you'd never call me healthy if you saw my blood work but you'd never know unless I told you. It might be harder to wear my condition in my 30s and 40s but for now I am young and fit and girls are never concerned by it.

Both genders, assuming I'm a personable, good looking, well groomed, dressed nicely, and nice but not a "niceguy" 19 year old in a university program of mostly girls, what are my odds of not dying a khv if I never ask a girl out? I know they're not great, but does any of that make a difference at all?

Girls rarely initiate. Just man up and do it yourself.

>Why do girls always say they're more socialized to be ashamed of their sexuality than guys?

Let's be real here... It's not that hard to figure out. Language tends to be a pretty good way of taking the temperature on approximately where any given society is in terms of what they do and do not think is relevant to them. In general, the more something is relevant to a society, the more words revolving around that concept there will be.

Off the top of my head, words that slam women for their sexuality:

>Whore
>Slut
>skank
>floozy
>tramp
>loose
>minx
>hussy
>hoochie

Meanwhile on the other end, what is there?

>Manslut?
I almost don't know if that counts since that's literally just throwing man at the start of a word that is associated females

>incel?
I guess... But that's in completely the opposite direction and is more about *lack* of sexuality, and on top of that, probably 80% of the population has absolutely idea wtf that word means. It's a Jow Forums word.

Jow Forums is an echo chamber and the world exist in far grander scope outside of it. But even on Jow Forums, more words are used to hate on "impure" or "slutty" women than are used to hate on men.

I've only heard like 3 of those words, and one of them is in the title of Disney movie, so I don't know how well that argument holds water.
Honestly though, I wasn't exactly asking for proof that they're shamed, so much as how. If it's literally just words then I find it hard to take that quite as seriously.
Plus there's there's the fact that words formerly used exclusively for men have slowly become gender neutral, or even feminine.

Ladies, have you ever been attracted to someone physically/mentally, but they come off as intimidating in some way? And if so, what way were they intimidating?

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Bruh, chicks are literally attracted to intimidation.

It hardly seems worth it though.

Nah, he should just move on and have no reaction to whatever the dumb cunt is doing and saying.
Don't read them at all. She wants validation from you after breaking up with you, respect yourself and move on.

Ideally, I should be a little intimidated because he seems like a cool, funny, knowledgeable guy and I hope he likes me and he should feel the same way about me and it all evens out. But in terms of type, I'm exclusively interested in sweeter looking men.

>feeling intimidated by women

Kek

Why? What's so horrible about rejection that you can't handle it?

>What's so horrible about rejection that you can't handle it?
Rejection.

It's not that I can't handle rejection, it's that the cost of rejection isn't offset by the value of the relationship for me. There's a handful of reasons any relationship I get into isn't going to last, so it's not really worth it to go out of my way looking for one when all I'm after is a demo copy to make sure I can't run the full game.

How do I do a date? Do we plan to meet somewhere or do I pick them up? I'm assuming you're supposed meet somewhere for the first one. What kind of activities are you supposed to do? I've heard something like bowling or an escape room is good because you can see each other and talk freely. Our local escape room is inside a mall and I've seen going to malls is a no go, is it okay if it's just to go to the escape room?

Women are far more liable these days to be called frigid, or will just be outright rejected if they don't whore themselves out.
Which is more likely: a girl saying she wants to wait until marriage, only to have the manwhore bail when he can't use her body; or some sperg shouting "whore" when a girl says "I want you"?
The answer is obvious, and you can arrive at it from many different routes. To use a separate example, there is a reason people complain about "slut-shaming" but it's perfectly acceptable to slam religion and morality as "outdated". And it's not because religion or morality are dominant.

>more words are used to hate on "impure" or "slutty" women than are used to hate on men.
On Jow Forums, yes. Not really real life. In the sense of use alone, there is still the legacy of what used to be an insult, although as far as actions go, it doesn't line up.
That said, the lock and key 'analogy' is cancer that should be rooted out and destroyed.

why do girls go together to the toilet

Meet somewhere for the first one. Escape room is a so-so idea and depends on the girl and the fact that it's at a mall is kind of low class. Ideally the activity you pick should be fun but take the pressure off having to hold a conversation for hours and hours. Ice skating and mini golf are great sate ideas.

Date ideas are ideally something that you can extend if things are going well. You take a girl ice skating and you're both having a good time? Cool, take her to grab some food afterward. Come. Up with your ideas for a primary activity, then look up what's around those areas that you can transition to if you aren't ready to call it quits yet.

Last thread he also said he regularly abused his previous girlfriends.

Seems like quite the madman.

made a discord server for ask opposite gender feel free to join:
discord.gg/PrHjtD9

Dude here
I am getting intimate with a girl that is in a long distance relationship. She seems into it since I provide the physical affection that he isn't there to provide, but I'm worried shes only doing this to humor me because we had feelings for each other and I still do (pretty sure she does too.) Will she be guilty if things progress? Will she blame me? I initiated this, but I also made it perfectly clear that I wouldn't lay a hand on her unless she was comfortable with it, and she gave me consent.

I'd say it's more impressive to survive cancer, than lifting whatever arbitrary amount of weight that doesn't really mean anything to me anyway.

You'd be far more interesting than the Chad-stereotype. Besides that, it all depends on how you actually are as a person, because how you dealt with it emotionally could be an issue.

>Women are far more liable these days to be called frigid, or will just be outright rejected if they don't whore themselves out
Wait, so this is why I can get dates, but I always get ghosted a few dates in?

I'm a 26 year old virgin, and I wondered what the hell i was doing wrong, because it seemed like the dates were going well, but the last date always ends with them acting a bit weird, and then I never hear from them again.

Is that... Is that seriously why? Is sex that mandatory? I usually only go about 3 to 5 dates before they suddenly disappear.

You're doing the right thing.

>Try talking to shy girl
>Sometimes she's actually engaging but convos are kind of one sided
>Shy to the point of almost lacking personality/opinions
Does she wants nothing to do with me and she's just too nice to express it?

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Bit of a story on this one, since I've been that girl before:
>Get boyfriend
>Things are great, can really see spending my life with this guy
>He decides to move far away
>Can't join him
>He tells me "not to worry, it's tempoary!"
>a full year later, still no timeline for when he might be back, only rarely see him on vacations when he can afford to take the flight
>I am told to not visit since he works in a dangerous country (Lithuania, Vilnius)
>A very good friend of mine starts to get more touchy
>Just let it happen for the most part, it's innocent enough, and with how little I see my actual boyfriend, I'm starting to feel like we aren't a couple regardless
>He told me it was just joking around, and that he wouldn't cross any lines
>Fine by me, I had 0 plans on actually cheating
>as we hit the 1,5 year mark, I hadn't seen my bf for half a year, and I was tired of these pointless skype calls.
>Friend slips up once, and goes for a kiss. Apologizes afterwards, and gives me some room.
>I would legit rather be alone than in a situation like this
>End my relationship with my boyfriend, and friendzone my friend who had been trying for more while I was in my LTR.
>We are still not dating, and I've made it very clear we shouldn't, either. He still holds out hope though, or so he says, but I know he sleeps around anyway, so I'm not really keeping him on a string.

The thing is, when you put yourself in your situation, you are taking advantage of a very obvious need she has. Whether she realizes it or not, you are abusing her trust and vulnerability in the situation to get intimate. In my honest opinion, that's an absolutely god awful foundation of a relationship. So really, progress isn't necessary, she could very well be blaming you already, you just don't know about it.

I do want to try later down the line, if he is still available. But you are putting her in a very difficult spot.

...Really? I just feel I am getting closer to the point where people will assume something serious is wrong with me if no one else has wanted to stick around long enough.

Please

Sex has become an expectation of sorts that you don't necessarily have to cave into as long as you communicate what it is you want with the other person at some point. If you want to wait a couple of months or until marriage that's okay but you need to say so and yeah maybe that conversation is a little awkward to have but it needs to be done.

If you're going on 3-5 dates and never getting past a few kisses guys are gunna assume that you aren't interested in them or are stringing them along or just that your expectations for the relationship don't align. Expectations can't align if you don't communicate.

No one answered you because your post doesn't really mean anything. What is your problem and what are you actually asking for advice on?

I'm afraid of girls finding me attractive and sexuality more generally, which is making me unhappy. I have some ideas about how things might've gotten this way, but if I try to take matters into my own hands to fix it I get nowhere, because I get hit with a wave of fear if a woman shows interest. I don't know how to learn what I need to in order to form intimate relationships, because of this same fear response

If you aren't telling them you're waiting outright, then either there is something else going on or you are dating some terrible people.

Men generally don't have the same thought process you do--where women will think "this guy hasn't attracted other people, why is that?", men will be more concrete and go with what they know of you.
Granted, certain types of them will be wary (note the hedonists on this board who bemoan "boring and inexperienced" girls), but that's strictly because of your body, and not because of you as a person.

Other women might give you shit for it, but I can assure you that the guy worth dating and marrying won't.

I'll tentatively give support to talking about it--it really does save time, and the men who use women as notches on a bedpost are instantly deterred with that (in particular, they can't have a specific timeframe or a nice-sounding condition like "I have to love you". That gives them an incentive to stay until they get what they want, and it happens more often than one would hope).
However,
>3-5 dates and never getting past a few kisses guys are gunna assume that you aren't interested in them
Is simply wrong unless you're in a very liberal, promiscuous area. Don't feel compelled to do anything to get guys to commit--it doesn't work like that for them. If you try to keep them around with your body where they wouldn't otherwise stay, they'll only stay for your body, not for you.

tl;dr do what the woman in pic related did and find that good guy

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Hmm... I just feel like it would be weird to bring it up out of nowhere... No one has really said anything about sex either, but I guess I could be missing some cues when they drop me off after the dates.

It's just weird... the last one we even agreed to meet on the 23. December for a Christmas date, bug then after the 5th time we hung out, he just ghosted me. Didn't get a response the following day, the second text I sent the following day was also left on read, and the third and last one I sent a few days ago (almost 3 weeks after he ghosted me) is now also on read. It just seems so weird. Does that really come off as not interested?

Hmmm. Interesting. I've actually been told I'm "a good date", because not only do I take a lot of initiative, I like more active and weird stuff (laser tag, wall climbing, etc), and I'm usually pretty good at planning out these dates on my own, too. Could be I am too weird for them I suppose, i just thought it was more interesting than just food at a cafe and then nothing else.

I guess I'll just keep at it then. I just feel like I'm doing something wrong when I keep getting ghosted out of nowhere despite putting a lot of effort into it. It kinda sucks if it is just because sex is all they want.

Where do you find these dates?

Don't say tinder.

Try to ask her straightly her opinion, "hey what do you think about x? And y?". You will see.

>Don't say tinder.
...uhm... why not?

Try literally any other app you can think of.

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None of that seems particularly weird to me, and it doesn't sound like your dates were put off by it, either.

Are you using a dating app? Those are going to be filled with the lowest-quality people of all your options, so it isn't surprising if this is happening to you.

>It kinda sucks if it is just because sex is all they want.
You can break down guys into three broad categories:
-Those who just want sex. The manwhores.
-Those who expect sex as a part of any dating arrangement (the majority of Western men). While they are not necessarily after your body alone, they will leave if they can't use it. So not malicious by definition, but inadvertently predatory,
-Those who solely want you. This isn't to say "sex is bad", and that they will never touch you. It's something to be very careful about--the men in this group will be perfectly happy waiting, and a subset of them would consider the waiting itself a positive.

Dating apps like Tinder are going to have a lot from group 1 and the dregs of group 2.

To look after each other's bag so no need to bring it in the toilet where usually there's not a fucking place where to hang it, and we also use those 5 minutes to talk privately on how anything outside the restroom is going.

How bad of an idea will calling my ex for her birthday turn out to have been?

Whelp... I'll look around I guess.

It's not even that I am against sex, I just haven't actually tried it yet, and I feel a bit intimidated throwing myself into it. Even then, people aren't even being explicit about wanting it, so it's a bit odd that it's being glossed over like this. It's a bit crude, but I would just think it would be better to just outright ask if I was up for sex, rather than outright ghost me.

Seems my use of Tinder was my main error though. I'll see what else I can find, might have more luck there.

Thanks Hitler.

>It's not even that I am against sex
Neither am I. I'm just against treating it carelessly.
But yeah, you'll definitely see more success outside of Tinder.

Good luck.

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1/2

I have a female friend who used to be very close to me. We used to work together a lot. She was like my mentor, and in a way was like the older sister I never had.
It was wonderful for the first few years of the friendship: her and I really got to know each other, not just about work but also about our lives.
Then earlier this year I'm pretty sure I hurt her when I had a mental breakdown at work since the environment became downright hostile. But despite this she still stood up for me to the shitheads in management who precipitated it and still blamed it on me. However, since then she's become a lot more distant and it's been hurting me. I thought things would get better after I changed workplaces (though we still have projects together since it's the nature of the industry/academia circlejerk) but she still insists on being "professional" all the time even though months have passed, and I'm still able to perform work, even if it's for other people.
We met last week for yet another meeting which I was not well prepared for since I had been busy with my other job, but I know I tried to do what I could. It didn't help that our supervisor suddenly changed things mid-meeting and I couldn't keep up, and that I had made an honest mistake by accidentally switching the locations of two of the numbers in a table. She asked to see the original data, which I pulled straight off an email she sent me, and she insisted was wrong (it was off the email she sent me to correct the bad data) and that I had disobeyed her directions by keeping the bad set of data. By this time I was pretty much in shock (which the supervisor also noticed) and I ended up overhearing her and the supervisor talk about another meeting whose topic sounded a lot like another project her and I had been working on, which I was not invited to.

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2/2
On my way walking out with her, I asked her if I needed to show up since it sounded a lot like our other project. At this point she's fucking livid, even saying things like I never worked on it (though I distinctly remember being at meetings related to the topic). Thinking back I'm hoping it's just a misunderstanding, the latest one in a long series that I can't seem to interrupt.
We're supposed to meet again one more time before the end of the year without the supervisor, but after what happened I honestly don't have the heart to send out the invitation. I don't even know if it will be responded to. I want to talk to her about everything I've written since quite frankly this loss of affection is killing me but I'm afraid she won't believe me and will just get even more angry with me.

People aren't being explicit about wanting it because it has become a norm that somewhere in that 3-5 date mark you'll end up in bed. Guys will wait longer if they like you but since you aren't communicating they don't know that all they need to do is wait.

The other reason they aren't telling you they want sex is because even though men know we need to be the ones to initiate, we aren't strictly "allowed" to ask for it from a girl who isn't obviously down for it.

>boring and inexperienced" girls), but that's strictly because

Actually I'm gunna fight you on that. Made friends with a girl a few years back. Nice and pretty and exceedingly naive. She told me eventually that she didn't even have her first kiss until she was 21 and it was like oh honey that explains so much. At least in her case though, her lack of dating experience (which I think we can all admit is a big part of our lives) had led to her being naive about the world and about people for much longer than you'd normally find, and her naivety caused her to be a pretty boring person to be around.

I covered this--I said that men generally aren't going to look at the lack of dating/sexual experience proper as a flaw. Sure, you might have had an issue with her naivete, but that would have existed no matter how she got it.

Tell her that you'd like to set things straight, clear the air, whatever. Try not to sound pissed when you send the message. Be as genuine as possible, maybe your feelings aren't as obvious as they feel. Unfortunately, if she doesn't reply to you, I don't know what you can do. If she never replies it'll feel pretty fucking horrible, I've been there before. I suppose its better to put your heart on the line and try to fix things though.

Meant for

Yo is there much difference in quality between hitachi wands or am I good just getting one from lovehoney? I don't imagine there's much quality you can squeeze out of something that just vibrates.

As a guy I feel the difference when I'm doing it without condom. What about girls ? Do you actually feel a difference too ?

Why cant I get over my ex? He is clearly over me and I just cant seem to let go. 26 yrs old and this relationship is by far the hardest to get past. I ruined us by not being completely honest about an addiction I had been struggling with prior to meeting & dating him. I guess this is my karma and I deserve the pain I endure each day. Its just so difficult accepting that he doesnt love me anymore and doesn't want any contact with me. I never meant to hurt him. I regret so much shit but I have to muscle up the strength to continue life. Ive never loved anyone the way I do him.....I suppose if I lied, guess I didn't love him that much (according to him) I get hit on so much and I literally tell men "Im sorry Im actually in a complicated relationship" then go about my day. Will my heart ever heal? How can I accept that he's completely done?

What are some of the ways you guys have gotten over an ex?

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Where do I find girls who only want to stay at home cuddling?

Last time I did that she chose to be neutral

Stop thinking too much about her (almost impossible), then I found a job, did more sports (went from 6 hours/week to 11), and the few evening I had free I spent it playing video games with friends online or else some friends came home.
I spent 6 months like this before I met a girl that made me realize it was stupid to be sad because of my ex. Later when I started to go out with a girl I completely stopped thinking about my ex and was over her

>since you aren't communicating they don't know that all they need to do is wait.
Call me an idiot, but I honestly had no idea sex was even a problem. I sorta expected then to tell me if it was something they wanted.

I might have autism.

For women
I’ve never dated or even flirted with or talked to girls... they never are interested. I’m successful with everything else in life.... I can’t wrap my head around why women just don’t find me attractive. The girls I’ve liked have told me that it wouldn’t work literally because I’m physically not what they are attracted to, so I know it has to do with my looks... and I fail so hard on tinder... can’t even get matches...
Is there potential? I think I don’t look great but that I’m at least above average... but I get no attention and I get rated pretty low (5/10) and I just don’t agree with how people see me. Did I just have some bad exposure? Any advice to improve my looks?

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>oldest troll on Jow Forums and /soc/
>people still reply to it (and ignore new legit questions)

As far as my perspective goes, it's just the fact that men's sexuality is openly talked about - even if it's often the butt of a joke, it's acknowledged openly. Comedy often comes from taboos, sure, but there's a line, that's why people are often uncomfortable with jokes about rape or diddling etc. And female sexuality was just an untouchable subject. People literally played 'the penis game' where they progressed to shouting the word as loud as they could, but the word 'vagina' was an honorary curse word, grosser than 'cunt'.
I don't think it was an attitude of females themselves being disgusting, moreso that females are (or should be) above that and/or too fragile to handle it. But the impact was the same, because if I should be above it, what does it mean if I'm not? When I was going through puberty and developed a sex drive, I literally thought I was becoming male, because "only boys are supposed to feel this way, right?"
Doesn't help that your body is obviously changing around that age in ways you couldn't hide very well. Especially when your school uniform is sheer enough to warrant bra colour being specified in the dress code, eurgh. I'm amazed I never got heat stroke with how I bundled up 24/7 to hide any sort of shape.

I'm not going to compare my sexual shame to mens' though, because I'd have equally fucking died if I started popping boners when I was 12. I think it's one of those situations where it's just different for the sexes, not necessarily better or worse. I was also a very repressed individual, it's simply due to being female that I absorbed feminine forms of sexual shame, the opposite would be true if I were male. Maybe instead of the unspokenness stressing me out, I'd have instead been horrified that people were constantly blowing up my spot of being a horny little fucker by joking about it so openly. Just one of those things that you either experience or you don't, no one will ever know what it's like for the other side.

Yeah, saw the photo thinking "haven't I seen this like 4 times before?"

Pretty obvious troll.

>Doesn't help that your body is obviously changing around that age in ways you couldn't hide very well. Especially when your school uniform is sheer enough to warrant bra colour being specified in the dress code, eurgh. I'm amazed I never got heat stroke with how I bundled up 24/7 to hide any sort of shape.
I'm suddenly very happy that I never developed in that area.

It’s nkt a troll. I simply have a persistent problem and every time I ask I get no feedback and I also have ocd obsessions over this.... and I have nobody else to ask. It’s not a troll and I wouldn’t post if my question got answered....

She was probably preparing herself for a big conflict over it, and doesn't know what to do in this scenario.
It's also kind of a bummer. For most people, breaking up is really sad. Even if you don't want to be in a relationship anymore, it's the end of something that meant something. To just get "okay" as if you don't care has got to be confusing her about what your relationship even meant to you. She probably wants closure on how you feel about all this, and its jarring going from you being someone important in her life to suddenly having nothing to do with you (which is why many people attempt to be friends afterwards to ease into it).

All that said, it's 100% your prerogative whether you engage with her further or not, just a little food for thought.

Can you answer my question....
I’m
What’s wrong with my face I need a female to tell me

Or is pic related the reason

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You literally get 5 replies every time you post it, and they are all the same
>That is not unattractive
>don't use tinder, people are looking for sex, and don't give a shit about your personality
>work in your personality, maybe work out, you'll be just fine with a face like that
Literally every time. Try actually following the advice instead of continuing to make to stupid excuses.