My boyfriend is now transitioning mtf, but I don't know if I'm attracted to them anymore or if this relationship is going to work anymore. We've been together for 6 years, and for 5 and a half of those years, she was a man. On top of that, we're poor as shit. Basically, I take home $1800 a month from working 50 hours a week and spend $1400 of it on rent, gas for the car and medical insurance for us, meanwhile they work 20 hours a week, bring in about $1500, and spend $600 of it on groceries and car insurance. They're home most of the time so the agreement was that they'd cook meals and keep the place clean, but the place is always a dump and they hardly ever cook meals that I like. I'm tired of living in squalor and having so little to spend on myself while they work so little and piggyback off of my money. On top of that, my partner is depressed, and that's their excuse for not doing shit, like cleaning, or getting exercise to lose weight (because they're morbidly obese), or working more to help support us. Also I've known for years that I've wanted to start a family with them, but they've always been wishy-washy about it and don't seem to have any interest in it. I'm afraid that if I leave, they'll kill themselves, and I really don't want that to happen because I care about them as a person and still love them.
TL:DR; I can hardly save any money, I feel like my life isn't going anywhere, my relationship is shit, and I want to die.
Sorry I'm a brainlet and not privy to basket-weaving forum culture, but who is the 40%?
Matthew Jackson
Good advice, thank you. What do I do if they kill themselves?
Caleb Cooper
It really can be. Either you sit down and tell them enough is enough and if they want a fuckin hugbox to validate their harebrained decision, they can go over to Tumblr or some gay shit-- or you tell them you'll help them get their shit together but you're not doing it all for them, they have to help themselves.
That said, tranny + depression usually means they think having a hatchetpussy will fix depression. It won't, ever, but a lot of them are shilling that because the alternative is admitting to being wrong and they just won't. There's a good chance they're leaning into this tranny thing to magically ~~~~ their life into wondrous bounty. That said, you have all the telltale signs of a disaster starting to happen.
My callous opinion is to get out and never look back. But the humanity in me says sit down and get real with this 50/50 bastard because he's gonna end up getting his ass killed. Probably by himself.
Owen Wood
40% of the trannies who kill themselves
Jack Myers
god damn it
>you have all the telltale signs of a disaster starting to happen
I can't disagree with you. I'm so scared and upset by this entire situation that I feel like any move I make will hurt us both.
Luis Sanders
That's not on you.
Christian Watson
Dudes probably going to kill himself either way, that's just how mental illness be. I'd highly recommend leaving him. Will he kill himself? Probably, but that isn't on you at all. If someone relies on someone else simply to live, they're better off dead at that point. That sort of mental drain is not fair to put on someone else
Ayden Nguyen
What about our friends though? Most of my friends are mutual friends though him, and if something happens, I'm afraid they'll turn their back on me and see me as the villain. I feel like I can't just walk out on them because I know they'll get hurt.
Ryan Anderson
You can always get new friends.That being said, you could ask them for advice, they probably see a better solution to this problem than we can simply because of seeing the full picture.
Lincoln Hughes
That's true. They're going to be so disappointed in me though. 6 years and it was all for nothing? I can see the waves of pity pouring in right now.
Colton Perez
You need to break up with her. You're not attracted to her to her anymore as a female, which alone is enough to warrant the break up. The not pulling her own weight, blaming depression for her lack of ambition, and just sitting around getting fat are just the icing on the break up cake.
Leave her, and at first it'll likely be hard because you're in a codependent and toxic situation, but big picture you'll be drastically happier. You'll find yourself saving money, which alone maybe able to take you of the spiral you're in. The ability to be able to do something nice for yourself from time to time might make death seem less appealing
>That's true. They're going to be so disappointed in me though. 6 years and it was all for nothing? I can see the waves of pity pouring in right now. Then they're shitty friends. Just being with someone 6 years doesn't justify staying with them forever, especially given everything you've said about your SO.
Charles Reyes
OP just notify his close friends/family members that you are breaking up with him and he may try to do something stupid. He can't keep hostage forever, go live your life, seriously. It's not a healthy or beneficial relationship...
Caleb Price
I'm pansexual, dickhead. In theory it could have worked, but they really did make a much better guy. It's a pretty jarring change after 5 and a half years of knowing someone the way they were before.
Maybe I'm not giving my friends enough credit. Honestly, I have no idea what they'll say.
Good advice
Andrew Richardson
If you enjoyed it and cared for him during those past 6 years then it wasn’t all for nothing. This is coming from someone who had his relationship go sour after she cheated on me. Just because it didn’t lead to marriage or whatever end goal you had in mind doesn’t make it any less meaningful. Move on, never settle, if he’s not pulling his weight that means you’ll just pulling dead weight the rest of your life, if you friends leave you fuck em they weren’t your real friends
You should have left long before she started transitioning, m8.
Owen Green
Wait, op.... are you biologically a female?
Carson Brown
>he would've made a much better guy >I'm pansexual Thanks for reminding me why I don't take the LGBTLMNOPBBQ community seriously. Lmao go fuck yourself
Aaron Brown
Celebrate
Colton Walker
based for once
Ryan Ramirez
So sit down and talk to them, eh? Get your man's head back on straight. Ask him why he's depressed and if he genuinely believes this shit will fix it-- and if it doesn't, what his plans are for that. >see me as the villain That's their problem, not yours.
Luis Hall
I would say at first just ease him into the idea of exercising. Exercising actually helps with depression. I would recommend you both look into Jason Fung's books on diet and intermittent fasting. Also tell him to stop being such a pussy.
Josiah Ortiz
I'm afraid this is true.
Yes.
Explain.
Sebastian Cruz
>So sit down and talk to them, eh? Get your man's head back on straight. Ask him why he's depressed and if he genuinely believes this shit will fix it-- and if it doesn't, what his plans are for that.
I'll try this, but I have a feeling it's going to blow up in my face. They're very sensitive.
I've had the exercise talk with them multiple times. Refuted every single time. They're so fucking stubborn, I can't understand it.
Jayden Cooper
Well, why is them trying to avoid it? It's true that depression makes doing things harder, but apathy can still be a problem. If them doesn't want to put in any effort into improving their condition then it's their fault. Even if it isn't, it's still a responsibility for everyone to make life less shit. Whether it's fair or not, that's just how things are. At least that's the way I see it.
Oliver Anderson
>they >them >they're It's a dude, you poof
Oliver Williams
Bomb defusal experts go into work every day expecting their livelihood to blow up in their face. Porn stars go in every day expecting their co-worker to blow in their face
Do your part, sit down. If it gets bad, stick it out. Endure it. Tell them to cry it out, let it out, whatever. Get past the hard part. IF, that is, you love them. I don't really want to consign you to effort you don't want to put in. If pity and fear are all that keep you dating the MTF, it's time to say that you're not really attracted to this and that you're happy to be a friend, but maybe not more than that.
Landon Bell
Correction. You THOUGHT you were pansexual. This entire thread proves that you are not and no such thing even exists.
William Watson
Wait so you two live together but you pay all the rent? Despite your partner making more per hour than you and being able to save more than twice as much as you every month? This situation was fucked from the start.
Camden Jones
Btw I hope you dont fucking dare bring a child into your deranged, weird fucking relationship. You'll make a mess out of them and be all to blame for it.
Julian Jones
Hey user, if they are even thinkin going for transitioning there is already like 53% flat chance of suicide during and after the process, dont screw yourself over too, gtfo asap
Lincoln Jackson
Gross
Jose Garcia
Are you also obese?
Bentley Ward
Nope. 5"8 and 150lbs.
Lucas Wilson
>My boyfriend is now transitioning mtf, but I don't know if I'm attracted to them anymore or if this relationship is going to work anymore huh imagine that
Joshua Nelson
Lol bro most people in a shitty relationship are not strong willed people who can do that. You are wasting your breathe
Jaxson Scott
That's pretty fat
Jose Scott
Muscle, son. I rock climb and swim every day. You don't know what you're talking about.
