I like a girl that has a boyfriend

No, bro, I think you're her side guy. I think you're the one she's hitting up because you're convenient, accessible and basically at odds with her boy so you're not about to out her as a cheater to him. Lord knows I'd have words with my girl if she kissed anyone, long and harsh words. But, then, she ghosted the last guy who gave her an I-love-you. So.

Look, you're the sponge. Tonsa guys been like you, tonsa guys will, tonsa guys gonna post the same thread here maybe today, maybe tomorrow. Here's the big issue: they're still together and she hasn't said anything like 'I'll leave him so we can be together.' (Not that, really, you'd want that anyway.) If things between her boy and her were perfectly fine, you'd be long outta the picture. You're there because there's a rough patch, and now she's fucked up and so they'll probably have a make-up sesh soon. If not they'll break up and she'll be 'too emotional right now.'
You're not her boyfriend, but she has one, which means whatever the fuck you're doing isn't really even flirting, it's just pot-stirring and unfortunately, a lot of girls swerve on that. Girls get WAY hotter when they're in a relationship and denied their side gig.

Wise user, what is the solution to a problem like this? Cut the girl off?

>Focus on yourself and her or someone else will come.
What do you mean by this?
Damn yeah it's hard, but I do have my own things going on. I have to study for this big admission exam that's due in april. I'll try to focus on that.
So this is a no win situation. Yes I don't want her to leave him, she'll do the same to me in the future. And yeah, probably she is solving some issues in her relationship by showing interest to me. Should I just cut it off and mind my own business or keep it friendly?

Stop stirring the pot, dummy
If you're good friends with her go ahead and be friends but if it escalates to physical you just say something like "I keep that for girls I'm involved with." My line of choice is "My mama raised her a better boy."

It's a bit late since you got roped into that game already but it's best to just quit it hard now, she has a boy and you'd be mighty upset to know she did this behind YOUR back. In a show of respect and character, it's time to admit what you did was kind of a pot-stirring move and just back down calmly. No fuss, no muss
It's not like you're in some rift of no return, but you do want to be careful about those moves because they can come off the wrong way.

Since you're in the texting game if she hits you up about it maybe calmly explain that you'd really rather go steady than play as her side guy, otherwise if it just sort of stays in ambivalent space-- leave it well enough alone, don't need to drag it up. If you both forget about it that might be best.
These sorts of things can invade social circles too, so all the more reason to just sort of slide on out of that situation.

>What do you mean by this?
You know how it's always people trying to lose their virginity who never do? It's the same here.
Better yourself and a relationship will follow.

Even if she breaks up with him to be with you (which if we're being real here requires some level of emotional cheating) or even worse starts physical affair with you, it's going to be messy as fuck and hurt people. Do you want that on your conscience? Besides, you know that most likely she was really into her current boyfriend at some point, are you really going to be comfortable being with a girl who has a history of monkey-branching?

There's no quick solution to this, you either keep your distance and she might break up on her own, or you keep your distance and find peace being single or being with someone else.

I'm not OP by the way, I just have an identical situation minus the kissing. But thank you for the advice, and thanks OP for this thread. Extremely relevant to my current situation.

Thanks user. I will stop stirring the pot. We have become friends in a week so is not a big deal. I will move on and try to stop thinking about her.
Oh yeah, I thought because you said "yourself and her" that I should think about us together, I read it wrong. I am not desperate to have a relationship so I will keep for myself and my current duties.
No, I already feel wrong about this, I don't know what kind of deal does she have with her boy, but whatever the circumstances are, I wouldn't like to be on his side of the story. I am doing something morally wrong and I am a bit pissed with myself for it.

>If you're good friends with her go ahead and be friends
Can you elaborate for me? How should you go about being friends with someone if you have a sexual interest in them? Should you stop things like flirting, hugging, and holding hands?

>if she hits you up about it maybe calmly explain that you'd really rather go steady than play as her side guy
You are saying it can be prudent to ask her to have a relationship? This is a bit contradictory with the rest of your speech.

>trying to date a cheating piece of shit whore

The actual fuck did I just read?

Logic doesn't apply in these kinds of situations

OP here, should I send her a last message, telling her sorry for causing her problems? She mentioned she left unease yesterday. Or should I just cut contact?

You're doing the right thing for everyone by cutting contact.

If you don't send a message explaining that you are cutting contact, she will be confused and definitely try to contact you for an explanation. If you explain that you are cutting contact, she may understand and stop contacting you, or she may still try to contact you in which case you're within your rights to ignore her since you've already explained.

Thanks, and thanks everyone for their inputs.

Ask her out on a date & fuck

That's not going to happen, she has been very distant after our kiss.

So while she's being distant, she's just with her boyfriend and not you, but she still has you waiting.
Do you see how bad that makes you look? This girl has got you into a fucked up situation because she lost interest/respect for her boyfriend. Selfish!
My thinking is that if you ask her on a date, and she says yes, you can still fuck, and effectively get something out of this shit. But, if she says no, then her plan for you all along was to wait on the sideline and be a shoulder to cry on if needed. Cut her off!

>Cut her off!
I will, this thread has made my head clear, I am just trying not to think too much about her.

I still say you could ask her on a date. If you plan on doing that then there's no harm in asking

I won't, any kind of physical contact will make things worst, meaning she might get even more confused, her boyfriend will perceive it, and I might develop feelings for her. I already care a little about her if I am having a hard time not thinking about her, so the best is to go cold turkey and just be done with it.

Although your double double's are checked, those may make you right.

I'm in the same situation with ny closest friend. She isn't distant at all, we still get very touchy from time to time. What do? I don't plan on cutting her off, she's too valuable of a friend for that.

I don’t really have advice but I’m a girl in a similar situation (have a thing for a guy with a girlfriend, he told me we can only be friends but ended up kissing me) and I sympathize.

Ask her out & fuck.
Stop letting her put you in a fucked situation

Refer to

Gosh, she just texted me asking how I am, the temptation is too strong.

What are you going to say?

date her if you want, just temper your expectations and realize that she might not leave her bf, not for a long time. sometimes the chemistry is too much to give up.

She said "Hello! How are you?" I replied "Hi, fine and you? How's it going". I am going to keep it friendly, not flirty
Yes, that's the problem, we have a lot of chemistry.

>have a lot of chemistry.
obviously she has better chemistry with her bf, ya cuck

maybe, maybe not. If she likes me like she does they may be going through a rough patch, like wise user stated. Maybe there is a chemistry related problem between them, their relation has become stale.
Or maybe she is just a slut.

Look you fucking faggots, we know and you know that she's got you wrapped around her fucking finger. You say "Oh I'll do the right thing and back off" now, but when she notices that her orbiter is starting to pull away from her hard-to-get game she'll start making moves to suck you right back in.

I mean, it's already begun.

>>"How are u?"

All it takes is 3 non-committal and utterly meaningless words and you're already starting to buckle. What happens when she ups the ante and dresses puts on something a little more cute/shows just a little bit of skin and bats her eyes? You won't be able to stop yourself.

You want to know what you should do? Come fucking clean.

>>Hey so I actually really like you
>>It feels amazing when we're together and I've never felt like this before
>>But this isn't right - I'm not the kind of guy who would be fooling around with a person who is in a relationship and I don't think you're like that either
>>While you're still together with [x], we should keep to being just friends

You're now the good guy and now you've thrown the ball into her court. She can't fuck around with you and jerk your strings unless she wants to feel/look like an evil bitch because you've made the mutual attraction plain so now she has 2 options:

1. Backtrack and make it seem like she was just messing around and that you are mistaken (she was never into you in the first place): you've dodged a bullet, she's just a flakey fuck using you for an emotional adventure at you and her boyfriend's expense

2. She agrees and refocuses on her relationship. If things don't work out, then she can come to you and you guys can get together without as much guilt since at least things were done the proper way - they try, it doesn't work, they break up. She doesn't have to feel like a cheater and you aren't the girl-stealing fuck-face that broke up another couple. If they work it out and get married then whatever, good for them - there are plenty of other girls.

The alternative is that you both keep playing games until either she gets bored and ghosts you because you were just the awkward fling that she had while she was unhappy with her bf or it eventually blows up and she drops her bf to be with you instead.

The latter situation isn't as great as it sounds, either, because now she will always have some kind of guilt inside that she's a cheater and you'll always have a slight air of amorality. That can easily explode later on when she ends up with another guy again (because doing something once makes doing it again easier) and you have no more moral high ground to stand on because she also left someone else to be with you in the first place.

What if we already fucked?

>>Hey so I actually really like you
>>It feels amazing when we're together and I've never felt like this before
>>But this isn't right - I'm not the kind of guy who would be fooling around with a person who is in a relationship and I don't think you're like that either
>>While you're still together with [x], we should keep to being just friends

That's exactly what I plan to do. I can be very cold, it's in my nature. If things start to get flirty again I will tell her exactly what you said, and be done with it. I am not going to do this the wrong way, will definitely not going to be her fling. Like I said, I will keep things friendly but not flirty, believe me, she will notice the difference. And a little bit of skin can do nothing to me if I focus.

not even OP but that is not neccesarily true. i had an emotional affair on my ex, came close to making it physical. basically i found a guy a had WAY more chemistry with, but i stayed with my bf out of a sense of loyalty and the whole time sunk fallacy thing. we’d been together almost 3 years, been through a lot together and i didn’t want to ruin our “comfortable” relationship just because i found someone i had better chemistry with.

OP here, she is definitely in a friendly mood and talking a lot more than yesterday. I think this may stay like that, a friendship. I am going to stop seeing her in a few days so we won't have any reason to be together. Then we can forget about that kiss and be done with the whole thing.