ITT: ask the opposite gender anything

Mate I've been in love twice before in my life. The first time I was 18 and had much the same experience as you. The second time was nothing like the first. Enjoy your first love because it's too late now to tell you to be cautious.

I wouldn't say I love her yet, I like her a lot tho.
What I am saying is she is one of those innocent genuinely nice girls that you wouldn't let go of!

What was the second time?

She leaving in a few days. Idk, we sort of parted yesterday knowing it probably wouldn't work. I asked her if she had time for another date and she said she had to pack and still finish a lot of assignments so unlikely.

She initiated our first date, it was really spontaneous, so I believe her and I don't think she's just rejecting me indiscreetly. We agreed to keep in touch but who knows what that means.

We have a mutual friend I'm going to talk to about it tomorrow, maybe she can help me find a way to make it work. But man, it's not like you can start a LDR after like a week of dating, right? Such a fucked up situation.

What do you mean?

I was about 22 or 23, started getting closer to a girl I was already vaguely friends with after we hung out one on one by accident (everyone else that was supposed to be there flaked and she and I agreed to just go anyway). Dated casually for a while, I wasn't in a good spot and couldn't handle the commitment of anything serious but it ended up that way fairly naturally in any case. Lasted about 2 years all told and half way through I thought I might be in love with her just one night when we were just cuddled up watching a movie in a weirdly intimate silence. Had an arm around her middle and was tracing circles on her hip with a finger and she just looked up and gave me this really gentle smile that absolutely flawed me.

>Downloaded tinder about 2 weeks ago
>This girl matches with me, messages me first and we converse for about a week or 2
>Got her IG and got chatting on there
>Asked her out, she said she was busy with work and she would let me know
>Been about a week now, not spoke since but she keeps liking my stuff
>Is she still interested? Is she waiting for me to message her?

I literally have no experience with this stuff. 20yo virgin, havent tried speaking to a girl in 2 years.
I get that she might be letting me down easy by saying she would let me know, but by liking all my stuff does that show shes still interested but just genuinely busy?

Is the best thing to do just wait it out and let her message me first, or should I ask again in like a weeks time?

Have I fucked it up by not messaging her in the meantime? I thought it would be best to just leave it be, as the balls now in her court.

Any help is appreciated, cheers

Girls don't initiate and she obviously still wants your attention even if she doesn't want to go on a date.

2 strike rule mate. You make 2 attempts to invite her out on a date. Barring legitimate excuses, if a girl puts you off twice, you don't make a third attempt. It has to be up to her to try on the third time and you can either accept or turn her down, depending on the situation.

You might as well try again. Don't say anything about not messaging her in the mean time.

Hey girls, visiting from /o/ to ask a question about cars.

How much do you judge a guy on what he drives?

I've been into cars for a long time and have historically chosen to drive interesting cars over good cars. A couple of years ago the classic I was driving at the time died and it wasn't economical for me to repair it, so I sold it to someone who would. I bought a relatively sensible European car which is very nice, leather interior, doesn't smell like a gas station, etc etc. It's a NICE car but I'm considering a down grade to something more interesting but which will undoubtedly be nowhere near as nice.

Trouble is I'm 26 now and I feel like women kind of expect men to show off their success and a nice car does that pretty neatly, while I feel like anything else I might buy will just cause women to cringe at me, even though I will enjoy driving and fixing it.

Nice one man, appreciate it.

My bf have recently started sucking on my tits during foreplay. Is this behaviour normal? I haven't experienced it with other guys from previous relationships.

Macron/10, not very

perfectly normal, perfectly healthy

>fornication
>healthy
Wrong. Also, what is normal is not what is good.
If you lived in an area where the majority of men beat their wives, that doesn't mean you should beat your wife, too.

Guess I’ll do what I usually do and use this as a general ask thread.

Well, tomorrow will decide the course of the rest of my life. It’s kind of funny in a way, I grew up thinking I’d never find anybody to love me and be with me, and dreamed of being a husband and father, and I finally met someone and the past two years have been a disaster. Constantly trying to be a hero and trying to stop someone from killing themselves, only for them to get upset and the whole thing to bite me in the ass.

My most recent biggest mistake was getting a house with this person. We aren’t married. Both our names are on it. I’m not going to waste time talking about all the details, but recently I have been trying to get out of this relationship.

I gave her more chances than I probably should have. I should have listened to her family. I shouldn’t have ignored the red flags. I shouldn’t have been to forgiving. So hopeful and doe eyed.

I tried breaking up with her a few weeks ago, and as she was texting me, just before she finally walked out the door with her bags to “go be homeless” (I wasn’t even kicking her out) she decided to threaten to blackmail me with a supposed video she has of me during an argument we had where I was upset and hit a table or something. Threatened to send it to my family, or my workplace, just to stir shit up - unless I “gave her another chance” and didn’t break up with her. I explained how retarded that is, but ultimately I gave in to give myself time to think. I finally decided “who cares,” and made the decision that I had to just get away and move out.

Due to a story I don’t feel like telling, she became aware of this but accepted it. She begged me to stay until her car was fixed though, shit like that, before leaving, and I obligied. Recently though she has become more confrontational about the breakup and began starting arguments and saying that I am ruining her life, that everything is my fault (continued in next post)

Even if he pulls back when you want to escalate things? We've had sex before, but if I want him to touch say the clitoris. He pulls away and loose interrest

If you both enjoy it then its no big deal. Like this guy said , perfectly normal, perfectly healthy.

>Even if he pulls back when you want to escalate things?
I think you should be talking to him about this issue, not us.

Nah that'd be too much.

(Cont.)
And saying she is just going to kill herself when I’m gone, and that I am to blame for “not wanting to put in effort, and wanting to just break up.” There’s a lot of history I don’t want to get into, but there is no working through things anymore.

So we come to the fateful night. We begin arguing once she got upset with me because I wanted to go to bed instead of drive her to get pizza. She refused to leave me alone and things continued to get more and more heated. I finally reached my boiling point and told her to just kill her self, that she would be doing everyone a favor, that she had turned into her monster of an ex etc. I had played right into her hands.

With a smug grin she told me she recorded it all and that I “was fucked.” She was trying to blackmail me again. I couldn’t put up with it anymore and I panicked. I tried to take her phone so I could just delete the video and escape this mess and there was a struggle. She bit me. I tried pushing her off of me by her neck. She chased me around the room. I pushed her back at one point and she tripped and got her head. She threw a glass at me. She threatened to lie and accuse me of rape, saying that “it’s only fair she ruins my life because I am ruining hers.” I decided to try to secretly record her admitting and explaining herself with her phone. Her phone was already low on battery and once it died I went to charge it and called the police.

Once they arrived I handed over the phone and explained what had happened. One officer went inside to get her story. Once he came out he asked about the bump on her head and the bruises on her neck. I asked if he watched the video, to which he told me there was no such footage on her phone. Only the one where I told her to kill her self. Then I realized I never hit the “stop” button, and when the phone died while recording, it never saved.

(Cont)
I was arrested for “domestic simple assault” and another domestic charge for taking her phone which stopped her from “calling 911,” even though she had no such intention. She denied ever planning on accusing me of rape and all that (obviously).

They took me down to the station, they walked me to the ATM next door so I could withdraw my $40 for bail, and went through all the other crap they do to you when you get arrested I guess. They retrieved my keys from the house and let me drive myself someplace else to stay since I am no longer allowed near her.

I have always stayed out of trouble but now I have two Class A misdemeanors and my arraignment is tomorrow. I may or may not be looking at jail time all because this mentally unstable maniac didn’t want me to break up and leave.

I’m thinking of going on the run if I’m looking at jail time, buy myself some time with a trial. I refuse to do time because this psycho wants to control my life, and even wants to have control about whether or not I break up with her. I’m only 22 and I’ve barely experienced life. Now this 25 y/o who I’ve had to take care of for almost three years is trying to ruin my life for trying to break up with her.

What do I do guys? I’m so lost. I can’t beleive this is what my life has come to.

Girls, how important is sex in a relationship? Assuming everything else is good, can it be a deal-breaker in a relationship?
Also, how can you convince a woman that things sex is meaningless and doesn't want to do it with her man for all her life if it's not for making kids, while she won't hear any arguments about the intimacy/bonding part of sex?

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Does cervix orgasm actually exist? If your bf was below average and you’re in a fight with him, would it make you long for something your bf can’t give to you?

I'm not into cars myself, but I think it's much more attractive to pick an interesting car than a flashy one - especially if you're going to work on fixing it up.

Not every girl will feel like this however, different people find different things attractive.

No one is going to read all of that.

tl;dr: My crazy ex has been trying to blackmail me into not breaking up with her, and now after a mutual physical altercation over something insanely petty, I’m looking at jail time possibly because she thinks I am ruining her life by leaving her and now she is trying to ruin mine as revenge. I’m thinking of just running far from here. I refuse to go to jail because this maniac wanted to control my life, and every time I have tried to leave her, she loses it.

The details do kind f help though. It’s very complicated.

I did.
> I should have listened to her family.
This is a very important detail. Did her family warn you to stay away because they know she's fucked up? In that case, if even her own family doesn't back her manipulative bullshit up at a trial, you have a very strong argument in your favor that you're being framed.

It's going to be difficult to get out of having you tell her to kill herself on camera, but if she was recording that in secret, she probably caught the lead-up to that as well, so the jury can still see she's no angel there, either.

And even in the worst case scenario, it's only a misdemeanor, not a felony. Don't run from a court appearance, that will fuck up your life far more than anything this bitch can throw at you. Keep your cool and think about how to get through your case--remember that this all started when she managed to get you angry enough for the recording, and submitting to your emotions now is only letting her manipulate you again.

Depends how much disposable income you have and how much you like her. I'd be flattered if someone did something like that one month into dating. However, if you don't have a lot of spare money floating around, don't waste it.

Her family has dealt with her outbursts and tantrums when she was growing up, as well as her suicide attempts and having her involuntarily committed. A couple months ago when she purchased a gun and was threatening to kill herself, I had to call the police (which they also informed me only had two rounds in it), and when I informed her family her mother even said to never give her another chance and to walk away, as well as her brother who also said they’ve always figured she’d grow up and end up hurting someone or herself. Her sister has even told me before how manipulative she is.

I just don’t have the motivation for some trial. I don’t want to blow away what little money I have left on a lawyer. And who knows what else she’ll try to pull. She already threatened to lie about me raping her. The worst part is, there is no part of her that feels this is wrong. She fully believes that this is justice since I’m “not being fair” by leaving her and giving up on the commitment we made with this house.

google.com/amp/s/www.forbes.com/sites/jimgorzelany/2014/01/27/women-say-theyre-most-attracted-to-guys-driving-pickups/amp/

>I don’t want to blow away what little money I have left on a lawyer.
Well, what's more important, a small amount of money by your own admission, or not being in prison? With what you've said, it should be very simple to convince people she's just being vindictive, since her family is already aware of her problems, and the police will probably have a record of the incident when she threatened to kill herself.

user, given these conditions, if you're still refusing to fight it, you must WANT to go to jail. In which case I recommend you spend your limited funds on lube, to minimize the damage to your asshole when Tyrone sees the new meat in his cell block.

Who’s to say her family will even back me up? Or that she already hasn’t given them some twisted series of events of the other night?

Her family knows how she is, and has said things to me before, but they have by no means disowned her, or avoid her.

Again, are you looking for reasons to curl up and get fucked? That's why I am telling you to get started on your case right now, not whine to yourself about prison while doing nothing to avoid it.

Call her family and explain while you can, for Christ's sake. Or stock up on lube, your choice.

I can’t. Being out on bail under the specific circumstances, I essentially have a restraining order against me. I can’t go to the house, or near her, CSNT contact her, her family, or have anyone contact her or her family for me etc.

Then get a lawyer and tell him what you know so he can build a case. He will know much better than me or anyone else here, barring the odd lawfag who still isn't able to handle your case, how to put that into action--he can call her family as witnesses, for example.
>but I don't want to spend money
Too bad.
Having a criminal record and being in prison is far worse than being short on cash. Good luck getting a decent job with a criminal record, and the surgery for repairing a prolapsed anus from you-know-who alone will probably cost more than the lawyer.

I live in a city where most people rely on public transportation to get around, so if a guy doesn't have a car I'm okay with that. Its convenient if a guy does have a car, but its not a requirement.
Although I will say that I pay a lot of attention to how he keeps his car. If the car is mostly free of trash and clutter, this is a good sign. If the car is full of junk, if there's trash all over, if the car itself is relatively new but in bad shape, that means the guy is a lazy slob. Lazy slobs are automatically disqualified.

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Get a lawyer

Well without being an autist about it I keep my car very clean. Wash it weekly, vacuum it every other week, and any rubbish is disposed of as soon as I'm near a bin.

Where do I meet women?

I have the money. I have been going all out through this month in dates tho, and I don't want to make her feel like it's overwhelming.

Pretty good observation
My old roommate his car, (and bedroom) full of empty bottles and stuff where you couldn't see the floor.
He turned out to be crazy. (But still pulled chicks because tall and willing to say anything)

I had a friend like this. His work ethic would come and go and he'd surrender to laziness wherever possible. Even though he was a car guy and knew his shit he treated his cars badly. On his last one he never washed it or cleaned it in anyway and claimed that he was going for the rat rod look. Interior was cluttered with stuff. Not a huge rubbish hoarder but there was plenty enough of it anyway, he did at least sometimes clear it out. It was a disgusting car to ride in though. Made me feel dirty. He once got in my car and was like wow its so clean and all I could think was yeah dipshit it's clean on purpose.

Is it normal to be lonely af but not interested in dating or anything? Because as much as I'd kill to have someone I can trust and love by my side, I have no desire to date anyone talk to anyone.

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My desire to date is pretty much zero at this point due to personal stuff, and I get lonely sometimes, but being lonely doesn't override my reasons for not wanting to date so nothing changes.

I'm debating whether or not to text a guy I met on OKC back in August. We were pretty into each other, but ended up not meeting due to extenuating circumstances (work, personal life, that kinda thing). I let him know that if he was still interested a few months down the road, that he should meet up with me at a local con in January. He seemed pretty down with that, but when I found out I wasn't going to this con, let him know. We then had a few more messages, including a drunk text from him consisting of some cheesy love song, but I haven't heard anything for about a month.
I'd like to reach out to him again, but I have no idea if he's still interested in this point. Signs point to "no", but I'm also of the mind that I'll never know if I don't try. Thoughts?

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Sometimes I feel like I should stick my neck out even if I don't want to go through the bullshit that is dating but most of the time I just opt out before it's too late.

I can't just wait for someone to love me but at the same time I don't want to spend God knows how long going through who knows how many people till I finally find the one.

Even then that person would just bail and I'm back to square one. Way too much effort I'm desu

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I couldn’t give less of a fuck what a guy drive honestly. People like to say women only care about what car a guy drives but most of the women I know don’t know the first thing about cars, so they just don’t give a shit.
But I do find it kind of hot when a guy drives a truck. I like the tough, country-esque type. But that’s my preference. Could care at all besides this.

Guys:

If you were to receive a sexually charged text message from a woman you want to have sex with, what would it say? And why would that work on you?

No idea, I'm a wizard. It won't work because I don't get aroused anymore.

GIRLS PLEASE

What are you hoping to achieve? Getting his attention? Getting him to rush to your house? Sexting for a bit? Do you already have some kind of relationship with him or are you trying to make your interest known?

It's for my husband. Guess I should have stated that. I want to send him something that takes him off guard and gets him in the mood. I was trying to think of something more unique than "take me on the table" and maybe give him a bit of an ego boost. I was wondering what would do it and women's advice can be kind of... onesided?

Yes and maybe

So of a straight girl has mostly guy friends it's a sign she's a hoe but what is it a sign of if a straight guy has mostly girl friends and no guy friends?

It’s really important. And a huge deal breaker. I would just throw the whole woman away.

He’s gay

Sex won't fix a fight. Your relationship problems and your ability to function as a man are ties to your problems as a human being, not as a walking dildo.

She can get dicks of all shapes and sizes but she uses yours because she loves you. If she cheats or finds a reason to leave it's a combination of your flaws and hers, but will not be solely because of your dick even if she claims that at some point.

Now stop being a fucking lunatic.

It means other men find him to lack traits that prove to other men (his peers) that he is loyal, decent, and trustworthy.

If that so, wouldn’t it be stupid and reckless to have a relationship with someone you really love but isn’t the best lover you ever had? Like, as a woman it would tempt you even more when there’s a problem in your relationship, right?

Or he’s just not fun enough to be around.

If a girl figures a guy for a guy when texting and doesn't excite her, is he just wasting his time texting her?

Unironically, send him nudes.

Yes. A girl who is uninterested wont suddenly become interested unless something changes.

Well, he's at work. Also internet is forever and all that jazz.

How important is social status through social media important to young women these days? If I have social media but low followers, is that a demonstration of low status?

For women who work at a nonprofit or in marketing, yes. For everyone else, no.

Yes but having a cervical orgasm isn’t the only way to cum and a girl shouldn’t just want that. Unless the guy is super super shitty in general i wouldn’t be tempted to go to someone else. If they’re shitty at sex I’d work with them to get better. And i would admit yes it would tempt me a lot more if there was a fight but i personally wouldn’t cheat but i know a woman could. Having a small dick doesn’t mean you’re shitty at sex. Being shitty at sex is being shitty. Cervical orgasms are fine but i think most girls, at least for me, like clitoral orgasms best.

I can't change my personality overnight but is asking her out to a date place after class tomorrow an acceptable way of altering that?

Ofc texting isn't the way to do this so it has to be physical. Ymmv but is should that change be more sudden/spontaneous or gradual?

I already invited her to an event this week but dont want to let this slip up continue so jumping the gun with a spur of the moment date seems like a decent idea, but also one with a lot of room for error (is this a bad thing?) And if I dont display physical interest properly, might make it worse by appearing passive.

God bless all (fem)anons who bless these threads with help.

What? Send them to his phone not the internet, send another message ahead saying something like "don't open my next message in public" with a little devil emoji.

If you won't even send nudes to the man you married because you're worried he'll leak them somewhere then you married the wrong person.

>I already invited her to an event this week
And what did she say?

Not interested is not interested. When I say she isn't going to suddenly start liking you unless something changes I didn't really mean your personality over text needs to change. It's too late for that. I mean a big change as in you two don't talk for 2 years then run into each other again and there's chemistry, or a girl leaves her bf and suddenly a guy she was friends with before is someone she can develop feelings for now. For now at least, she has written you off and you can't change that.

is it ok if i fuck around with girls on tinder the first week or two when i start seeing a girl? before im committed to her? i just lost my virginity and am trying to up my body count so i look like less of a sperg

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>laughs at things I say when they're not funny
>always does the glance back when I walk away

She likes me right?

Solid chance buddy.

either douchey prettyboy or gay

>what did she say
"Sure when" then the days she is free.

>she has written you off and you can't change that.
Well fuck me. Should I tell her to her face it's not worth our time or just 100% block all forms of communication and ignore her existence entirely?

Chances are she'll flake on the invite too so I'm leaning towards 100% block.

So, are you with a girl right now? Fucking sloots on tinder while actively getting with someone is quite a douchebaggy thing to do.

So, are you with a girl right now? Fucking sloots on tinder while actively getting with someone is quite a douchebaggy thing to do. Your girl is not gonna like it if she finds out and you can say bye bye to those commitment dreams.

He's definitely douchey. He's not that attractive though.

I'm going to not text her, block her on IG again and pretend she doesn't exist. If she asks what's up I'll just say I decided to pursue more worthwhile things

That way she'll know I'm going to actually fucking commit this time to cutting her off, that I have my own goals and that she is not part of them.

no but i gave her my number last week (my phone was broken i fucked that part up) and have known her for almost a year. I really want her if im going to have a serious relationship. i cant just ghost her for three weeks and say im ready now, done fucking everything that moves! shes graduating and im dropping out of college this semester. had to get her number now or i never would have seen her again

I'm not at that age yet. Social media is a big social factor among girls my age (or so it seems) and I dont have as many as most other guys because much introversion.

I dont want to broadcast my whole fucking life to people on snapchat or something but it seems important to extend your social range and give the appearance of popularity.

So this girl I have had a crush on for a year is still (probably) in a relationship. I have just been her friend and we have gotten real close. She is going on a trip to Costa Rica for about 4-5 months, is gonna come back for the summer, and then will be most likely going back again.

While I was talking to her about her trip to Costa Rica, she said she didn't know if she was going to stay together with her boyfriend or break it off, as she wasn't really feeling he liked her that much anymore, and that the spark wasn't there. As the smooth user I am, I told her to do whatever she thinks is best for her.

Then, last night I went to a party and she was there too. We got a little buzzed and she proceeded to use me as a pillow for about 2 hours, slowly getting closer to me until she was curled up around my arm. She made a comment about breaking up with her boyfriend but I don't know if it was a joke or drunkenness or whatever. She leaves in mid-January. Should I tell her how I feel before she goes? If I do it might strain our relationship, but if I don't I might never get the chance for a whole year, and at that point I will be out of college. Help femanons, this has been the only thing on my mind all day.

She's thinking about breaking up with him before the trip so she doesn't feel bad about slutting around in Costa Rica.

classic adv

I'm sure she won't care that you're cutting her off. Blocking her makes you look petty and like you're begging for attention. Just stop engaging her, you don't need to block someone for that.

If a girl breakup with her boyfriend, is it truly over? Will she ever think of getting back together in the future?

Is it wrong though?

They might get back together but he could never fully trust her again.

I mean i wouldnt put it past her if thats the case. I dont want a relationship before she leaves that would be too much. I just want her to tell her how I feel.

:')

I like that mane

Happy to oblige? I think?