Help with sex.
My gf wants some more intimate sex. For that I immediately thought of missionary (among other things).
Problems is, I have sort of a desease that makes me generally weak. I can't sit on my legs (it hurts), my back can't stand the stress and even leaning on her makes my legs lock in place (I don't have the strength to move them on the bed because it's a soft surface).
Can I still get missionary? Any other position as good as this one?
Kiss her. Move down to her cunt then work her clit or something. Then say I love you. I am a kissless virgin with no interaction with females so take my advice with a grain of salt.
All that is in that part where I said "among other things".
I need a position for the go getter. The preliminaries I'm already set on what to do.
I will help fuck her by extension by telling you what to do, great thread OP.
As long as it's my dick, why should I care?
You can fantasise you are doing my gf all you want. It's not different from whatever you already do on /gif/, plus you don't even know how she looks.
It's still my dick.
>a dude who literally can't fuck has a gf
What for?
Get creative and figure it out yourself
Did I post on /b/? I thought I posted on Jow Forums.
Where are the advices?
Oh gee, that's a great fucking advice!
"Figure it out yourself!"
That's the shit people come asking for advice for. To get told fuck all.
you're just going to keep getting baited because you responded to bait and flipped your lid
remain calm, ignore bait and stop acting so entitled, that's the secret to adv
>I have sort of a desease that makes me generally weak. I can't sit on my legs (it hurts), my back can't stand the stress and even leaning on her makes my legs lock in place (I don't have the strength to move them on the bed because it's a soft surface).
So basically you're parapalegic? You're description is so vague despite the fact that you wrote a whole paragraph. What disease do you have?
Obesity, he has obesity.
I thought of your sex riddle, OP, and I have a solution!
Start with her on top, entering you. Then slowly, slowly turn to your side while you're still inside her (easy, because it could hurt), resting her leg over the top of yours and vice versa; basically like you're spooning but you're both facing each other. Its intimate because you're facing each other, and you can kiss her all you like, and her cleavage will be excellent so you can kiss THERE all you like.
No stress on the legs or the back because most of your weight is shifted onto the bed.
I didn't feel like I needed to go into detail, but I have mitochondrial myopathy.
Generally it's degenerative, but not on my case for the looks of it. Still weak though.
Nice one. Thanks.
I'll see if I can spin it.
Haha, God gives Chad a debilitating lower body disease, meanwhile I as a gymcel with a for strong body must use my hand. This world is Uber gay.
I mean if a dude like that can get a gf then incels have no excuse
What do you mean by can't sit on your legs? Can you sit on your ass at least? Just sit up straight and have her straddle and put her legs around you. Sort of like a sitting sex hug. That one is pretty intimate.
It's my entire body though.
I only bitch about my back on bed because it's basically what you'll be using throughout.
I hope your life is painful and hard, so you can appreciate you gf more of course. Endure your life man!
I thought of that one. Might try.
And my legs hurt if I sit on them japanese style because I'm basically squishing and stretching my muscles more than I feel comfortable with, and I don't have enough strength to stretch it less. I either sit on them with my full weight or I don't.
If I exert myself to much I risk having actual back problems aside from just being weak. Then I go from having lighter sex to having none at all.
Nice advice tho. Fuck myself over for one night and risk never having it again. I'll keep it for later.
Like the other user said, on your side probably the best. It's slow and loving.
"reverse missionary" you start out with her sitting on you and pull her down so that she lies on top of you. kiss neck whisper nice things and gently muve your hip/her on and off your cock.
kinda depends on how much size difference theres between you two. This works with me and my gf but shes 40cm smaller than me.
also actual slow spoon with dick in works for me
He must make up for it with stuff like money and personality.