Depressed

lots of people cant get motivated to play videogames. try finding something to do that is actually rewarding and exciting.

not really but in the case of drawing i don't need opinions, i am aware of how wrong my shapes look, how bad the anatomy gets, i can't stop pressing down too hard, etc
i mean it's like a nearly daily desire to try again, but i feel almost in mortal danger of disappointing myself again.

i do have time
i can't learn, i can't read "how to draw" guides, i can't remember what they say after 5 minutes, it's the same reason why i'm unable to learn music because i can't comprehend notes and such

sex would excite me but i'm way too ugly and disheartening to be around, i had a gf 4 years ago but i left cos i felt like i ruined it as it was

Do something in the real world. Sitting there reading Jow Forums or playing games or watching youtube or anime is still just different ways of sitting there doing absolutely nothing.

Also when you body feels like shit your mind also feels like shit, you need to go outside and exercise or at least go for a walk. Even the most hardcore violent prisonners get one hour of yard time each day. Locking yourself in your room surrounded by the same 4 walls is what prisonners dream of getting out of. I was a depressed NEET for 4 years and as soon as I started just going for walks and then exercising I immediately felt better and normal.

also this.

i would but i wake up when it's pitch black outside, not to mention it's ice cold now, i'm not really a winter person

literally no one is born knowing how to read or how to draw or how to play music or anything it's all learned and we all suck at it when first start.

When I was a kid I played the piano and violin, I went to a music-focused high school and learned how to play the flute as well and then the day I graduated I didn't touch a musical instrument for about 15 year.

Now I'm in my 30s and re-learning all over again how to read sheet music and where notes are on the piano and rhythm and everything. I completely forgot everything it's like my childhood and teenage years of being in music ever existed. No I'll never be as good as some Chinese kid who was playing professionaly since he was 6 years old but fuck that kid I'm not trying to become the next Jiang Wong Chao or whatever I'm trying to become the next me.

Rip OP

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It's even more of a reason to go out and exercise. In the summer it'll be 35 degrees or like 100 or whatever in American heat units and you'll be even less motivated to work out. being out in the cold you can warm yourself up just by doing the most basic shit you don't even need expensive weights and all that you can just shovel the same pile of snow over and over again. There's also less people outside than during the summer so you don't have to worry about like getting laughed at or making small talk or people staring at you or whatever.

You gotta fix that self esteem, why don't you like yourself?

Mate I dont even know how to read notes, but I'm pretty sure anyone who just chills and tries to learn a couple strings could be able to make some basic tunes to begin with.
Just play a round watch some beginner tut or find a teacher to go to.

those are really good points... hell i guess i'll go outside tomorrow when i can actually see anything, thanks

i'm unlikable by default

I'm happy to help. I actually always preferred walking at night cause there's less traffic and people around - even more so during winter. I always have my "night time" music and playlists and given how the fuckin sun sets at like 3PM around here these days I can go out for a nightwalk earlier than the summer. I like how streetlights light up against trees and now there's also christmas lights. I hate the actual holiday of christmas but just having more lights around at night is enjoyable.

i mean i could but... i expect it to be extra cold, and i'll look like a total creep if someone sees me through a window or if someone actually is out there
it's almost midnight for me though

>sex would excite me but i'm way too ugly and disheartening to be around, i had a gf 4 years ago but i left cos i felt like i ruined it as it was

There’s plenty of exciting stuff in the world, but these days most of it requires some initiative.

Personally, I have been a pretty pathetic NEET, but now I’m learning to drive and I find that exciting. It sounds mundane, but when you think about it it’s a whole world of possibilities and interesting things opening up for me.

Is there something you’ve always wanted to do, or something you should be doing but aren’t (such as fitness)?

Sex popped right into your mind when I said “exciting”, so is it safe to say you want to have sex? If sex is something you are really interesting, but your defeatist attitude is holding you back, I would consider setting the defeatist attitude aside.

A lot of the more niche interesting things depend on where you live. You would have to open your mind to access these things and finally “go outside” as we all say.

sure I mean I got jeans that are insulated from the inside so they're like snow pants it's -15 celsius outside so it is cold as shit, and no one is going to be bothered to see a guy walking outside at night on the sidewalk as long you're not like walking up into their yards and poking your head through their windows lol

Unlikable by default towards yourself? Why?

my family often pesters me to learn to drive, but i am self aware enough to know that i'd just crash into a building or into people and ause serious damage or death... i don't trust myself steering anything
i should absolutely work out, i'm at least 20 kg above healthy (164cm manlet, 92kg, just a month ago i was 85kg, didn't change diet in any way), but the moment it starts hurting i give up, the moment i start really sweating i get itchy and feel disgusted, sweat is physically painful

i can admit that i've been told repeatedly how "good" i'd look if i lost weight and it's been a desire for many years, but i really am a defeatist...

i'll just drop anything i can think of

>unintelligent
>unfunny, dad-puns tier humor
>too talkative when least appropriate
>simultaneously desperate to quit talking entirely, but can not
>uninteresting
>depressed to the point of spreading
>ugly
>boring
>automatic target to being made fun of
>grossly obese
>degenerate, probably a pervert
>unmotivated
>unskilled
>unable to learn
>unable to listen, hear, remember
>weak
>slow
>EXTREMELY undecisive
>reason i cant enjoy games is because i cant stop self inserting, cant decide on a role until i decide if it represents me etc
>probably borderline according to tests
>self deprecating
>everything is a black or white choice
>

pretty much none of those things are "by default" you can learn skills and you can become interesting and you lose weight and improve your appearance and you can learn how to find the balance in a conversation and you can also learn how to learn, etc.

Not op but thanks user. This helped me a lot today

how do i learn how to learn when i'm an unintelligent defeatist

just llike anyone else, there's loads of books and youtube video and articles that are all about learn how to learn

i came to think... despite what i said, or rather about my talkativity, i find it super easy to just talk to people, WHICH is mostly a negative because i say cringy things, i reveal things about myself that NOONE should know, and even at occasions where i seem to have made someone have a fun time, afterwards i hate myself for not just remaining silent and calm, every single time without fault

Im telling you most of those are just due to your negative perception of yourself, has anyone else ever blatantly confirm any of those qualities?

It sounds like at every opportunity for growth you make a pessimistic excuse.

>I really am a defeatist
Luckily, that’s something that can be worked on.

For instance, being able to drive through local roads and not highways is *much* better than not driving at all. Heck, even knowing how to drive and not ever doing so is an improvement on zero.

Also, everybody has one form of exercise that feels good and they enjoy. Only doing one form of exercise won’t make you a fitness model, but it’s an opportunity to have fun and use your body! My personal favorite is biking.

As for weight, diet is actually more important than exercise.

And dieting isn’t such a bad thing either. Most people are maintaining weight, so they only need to diet for a period of time and then not overeat. -500 calories a day = roughly -5lbs. This means that once your diet is over, can can go back to what you’re eating now (assuming you’re maintaining weight).

That’s all the advice I can expend until you decide to make the change, man. You can come back and report progress or ask advice with something more specific.

does anyone but myself have to? noone can know me better than myself
but it's painfully obvious that i cause harm when someone stops listening, looks away, changes subject, suddenly has to go, etc
for example i rarely join in on group conversations on discord; my brother and his friends hang there daily, i know them to some extent, but without fail i somehow cause awkward silence unless i'm nearly completely silent

adding to this
>i take things too seriously
>i am an extremely poor loser
>at the same time i get hyper competitive easily
>i get angry to the point of hitting myself and raging, and if in a conversation(discord) it's almost inevitable that i'll sit there and talk shit

*roughly -5lbs a month

You can do it, OP.

i've tried different diets but i end up giving up over a single reason: nothing tastes good, i can't even eat eggs anymore which i used to love, the taste and smell make me nauseous
nowadays i just force myself to eat some cheap soup or sandwiches, and all i drink ever is diet pepsi
honestly i'm a disgusting slob

i...thank you man

idk what's up right now but i feel an almost burning swelling in my core, telling me that i should get outside and run for an hour, telling me to give dieting a try again, telling me to just fucking take a pen and paper and doodle...
i can tell on my increased heartrate how much i desire this, but my brain still tells me "start later", well it's midnight though

you can eat whatever you want in a day so long as it amounts to less than your caloritic expenditure. everything else is bullshit.

you could lose weight on a calorie restricted diet of ice cream. of course, you would feel miserable from the lack of nutrition, but you would lose weight

what's something i can eat every/every second day, is somewhat cheap, and is easy/quick to make?
i actually did lose weight on an asparagus-bacon diet for a while, but i got so tired of eating it

No problem, man. The weight loss could be the beginning of a domino effect towards a positive life. So could getting a license, or meeting a helpful new friend in the physical world.

For instance, if you managed to score a few hundred bucks, you could get a digital drawing tablet and even make animations. I’d be envious of that, man.

i own a drawing tablet... i unpacked it and made sure it worked, but never tried it
been blaming lack of desk space or not owning a good program since, despite having a pretty modular desk and there are multiple free drawing tools that work just fine... basically excuses

Bacon and asparagus? That sounds good. That’s an important point, about variety.

The most important thing in the weight-loss meta at the moment is avoiding *empty calories*. Empty calories are fast-burning carbs with no nutritional value, such as Hostess cakes. The reason to avoid them is that they contribute to your caloritic intake yet don’t provide consistent energy or good nutrition.

Eggs contain protien and fat, which is absolutely good for your weightloss plan. They’re not so great on colesterol, but that’s a different subject.

Lean meats are great, nutritionally. Even fatty meats should suffice so long as you control your portions. Vegetables are always good, too, since they’re high in nutrients and very low in calories.

Fruits and vegeables are necessary for fiber. I read somewhere that Eskimo communities who only ate hunting kills used to cut open the stomachs of the herbivores to eat their grassy contents. On days you don’t eat plants, you might do good to have a fiber supplement. Fiber One cakes are neat because they taste like dessert yet are low-calorie, but you can also take a fiber supplement in the form of a fruit-flavored gummy.

If you’re the average person, you might need the cheap energy boost provided by carbs. To handle this, stick to slow-burning carbs as often as possible, and just make sure that an adequate portion of your intake is protien and fat.

As for calories, subtracting 500 calories is subtracting about 2/3 of a meal.

If you normally have 3 typical meals, shrink one of those meals down. If you can stand to skip a warm meal for lunch, try peanut butter and celery or apples, maybe with a side of cheese.

When other people are stuffing their faces for dinner, have just one plate.

That ought to do it. And the calorie deficit is not forever! Once you lose the weight, you can add the 500 calories back on again.

i suppose i should give eggs a try again, maybe i just overreacted because i felt bad last time i had some
lean meats
i actually love cherry tomatoes, are they bad?
more fiber
slow carbs, such as brown rice and brown pasta? i have some lying around but i failed at cooking either into something edible
proteins and fats

i'm noting this, thank you man
hell i should probably revisit Jow Forums as well, but not right at this moment

is it fine to eat 1-2 times a day? i generally skip breakfasts

i cant figure out how i should talk to people

either complete silence, only reply, and give myself time to think before those replies

or somehow stop worrying and just...continue, but as described above i ruin any human interaction by being me

It’s about total calories. I’d eat breakfast if I were you.