I'm sure this is a common topic. I'll try to make it quick. Not a troll post. Also not a post from a sad virgin. I've been with lots of girls. I'm used to getting everything I want, bdsm, on demand oral and anal, etc.
For some time I've been largely non-monogamous. I met this girl a year or so ago in that context. And we really just have fun together. We can hang out all night, laugh about stupid shit, relax when we're not doing anything. She doesn't judge me for drinking too much. I found myself always hanging out with her even when I had 3 other girls hitting me up.
She also has been non-monogamous. She told me early on she wants a "primary partner." She's definitely attached to me, sends me stuff all day, gets butthurt if I don't respond, etc. In the past I've always fucked around because I didn't really care about the girls anyway. I'm starting to care about her, so it feels weird that we would both fuck around.
But on top of that, she's very specific sexually. She likes to be controlled and abused. Fucked hard, strangled, smacked in the face. Which is great and all. But she won't suck dick, won't take it in the ass, won't mix it up by say riding me occasionally, and I'm used to all that stuff and I like all that stuff. She "bottoms from the top" in that if I'm not abusing her hard enough she gets whiny and bitches at me mid-sex and that really puts me off. I've explained this to her but she doesn't understand.
On top of that. The thing that somehow bothers me the most. She fucks niggers. I really don't consider myself racist, I have black friends, I've fucked black girls, I fuck other people, she fucks other people, so it really shouldn't bother me, but it does. I've met two of her ex boyfriends and they're both black. She's talked about getting gangbanged by two black guys. She obviously likes black guys and somehow that just bothers the shit out of me. (cont)
(cont) TL;DR I'm a massive manwhore, she's a slut, we actually really get along together, but our sex isn't compatible and it bothers me that she prefers niggers and I don't want to be meeting her nigger friends on the street. I don't want to get emotionally attached to someone not sexually compatible, I don't want to stop seeing her, and I can't keep seeing her without getting more attached.
So, advice?
Andrew Lewis
this depends on your age and willingness to settle down. it seems like a perfectly healthy relationship if you two were FWB, but creating a rift is inevitable if you both plan to spend the rest of your life together. i've seen cases of promiscuous women get "born again" into a trad lifestyle, but its usually only when they want to retire from their twenties lifestyle and settle down with someone, even then they sometimes start affairs after marriage.
ask yourself how far you want this relationship to go
Carson Adams
My only advice for you is to get tested. Chlamydia can run through your body for months or even years without noticeable symptoms.
I could tell you more, but you wouldnt listen. It would be something about monogamy.
I'm 31, she's 35. I've been sorta waiting for "the one" to stop fucking around but out of 100+ girls this is the only one to keep my interest lately and I don't know why. She isn't even that pretty. We just have a good time together.
Yeah I should probably do that. So far just the ol' herpaderp that I know of.
Julian Fisher
all i'm going to say is that if you ever wanted to carry on your genes and be a father, you better get her pregnant fast. pregnacy >40 is a recipe for disaster. propose the idea of settling down to her and see how she takes it
Nathaniel Allen
She totally wants me to knock her up. She's referenced it subtly a few times and when she gets drunk she'll outright say things like "I want a baaaby"
When women reach the end of their biological clock, they go into overdrive for that shit.
And I do want to be a father. Some day. Not today or tomorrow. What I don't want is to be one of those guys locked into a child support payment with some hoe that didn't work out. So for now, knocking this girl up is the absolute last thing I want.
Jeremiah Baker
is it viable for you to move somewhere else away from her exes/past relationships or are you stuck where you are because of a career? places like the pacific northwest and northern new england are still predominantly white. regarding children, i agree with you completely, but the rate for autism and birth defects of a child rise exponentially each year after around 40 so keep that in mind also
Cameron Brooks
You both sound like stupid people who shouldn't be dating. Open relationships like this never fucking work
That's really funny you should say those things. 1) I'm from northern new england. She lives in northern new england. 2) I travel a good portion of the year. I live off-grid and drive around the country in a custom built tinyhome. I didn't bother including this in my initial post because it just adds too much complication. I see her consistently in the summer, I travel in the winter, and she flys to me wherever warm place I am in the winter.
I hate the cold. She has already offered to move to whatever warm place I want to live if I would stay in that warm place. I told her not to move for me.
Leo Mitchell
So, what, sexually adventurous people can never find a partner in your mind?
Leo Fisher
No, my point is if you want a serious relationship, stop doing things that prevent you from getting one. Seems like you are carrying a lot of baggage.
If you want to date someone exclusively, do that. That being said, you can't have your cake and eat it too. This isn't hard. Find some girl to settle down with and stop fucking different partners.
Jose Anderson
I never got that saying. What the fuck does anyone do with cake besides eat it? If all cakes were not to be eaten no one would have any cakes.
Ethan Bailey
I can't tell if you are trolling. It means, you can't eat a cake, and still have it not eaten, because.. you know. you just put in your stomach.
if she is willing to move for you, that's a pretty clear sign of dedication. i doubt that she would be against the idea of settling down. like the other user said, baggage is best left in a place where you cant access it. /trv/, Jow Forums and city-data.com could probably find you a few places that can meet your ideals for climate and demographics. i must be visiting the wrong cities in new england since i never see black people outside of MA and CT, but there are warmer, secluded places on the west coast that could fit your needs
Owen Lee
Okay but I'm not going to literally consume a female and find her no longer before me. Dumb saying with no applicable meaning.
That's the thing! We're both from Vermont. She's lived in Vermont all her life. There are like 4 fucking black guys here. But she manages to fuck black guys exclusively somehow.
I'm exaggerating of course, there are more than 4. But whites are the majority. It bothers me that she somehow seeks out black guys, and brags about it, and I end up meeting them.
And yes. It is a sign of dedication. If I asked her to move to California with me she would. I just don't know.
Jordan Harris
>Okay but I'm not going to literally consume a female and find her no longer before me. Dumb saying with no applicable meaning.
Dude, you understand this saying went way over your head, correct? How fucking dumb are you?
>have your cake and eat it too
To do or get two good things at the same time, esp. things that are not usually possible to have together
Jose Russell
No, I really don't understand the phrase.
>cake something you eat
>have your cake and eat it too the literal intent of the cake
What the fuck else is cake for?
>but if you've eaten it you don't have it anymore! Yes I know that is why I acquired the cake, to eat it. What is the point?
Nathan Russell
then it's the trait of women seeking men of other races for curiosity, bragging rights, and personality/rebellious statements. its sort of like hunting big game in their eyes, especially in areas where it's frowned upon or uncommon. Jow Forums has 500+ reply threads on that topic every day. its common for europeans to do that in the same way its common for asians to seek out white people. northern california isnt as warm as socal, but it would probably suit your lifestyle more. if she really is "the one" i dont see any reason to hesitate
Caleb Myers
>So, advice?
Communicate with each other more.
actually take time out of both of your schedule and talk to each other. No distractions, so that means no phones, no background noise. Just you, her, maybe some chairs and maybe a table.
If you want to be serious with this chick, then you express it and then make compromises to make this relationship work out.
Kevin Flores
Get rid of her.
Eli Baker
It bothers you on an animal level, and that's the kind of thing that will never go away.
Get rid of the coalburner. Tell her why so that it ruins her and she ODs.
Jace Myers
Yeah. I'm probably going to do something irrevocable now.
Oliver Taylor
It's an idiom but what hes saying is that fucking nonstop sluts and settling down are pretty much mutually exclusive
Charles Davis
you know how the saying goes, user once you go black, we dont want you back
Chase Edwards
How'd you get this way man to have girls loving you like that? Asking for a friend. Sorry for the hijack.
Easton Walker
This whole situation is fucking stupid and possibly bait, but:
If you're so dominant and she wants to be controlled why don't you just bend her over and fuck her up the ass?
Jace Flores
Say say is basicly saying if you eat you cake you no long have any cake
Hudson Adams
>I'm used to getting everything I want, bdsm, on demand oral and anal, etc.
Bad start
Zachary Hill
>but the girl gets everything she wants without reciprocating and that's not a problem
OP is stupid for being in this situation but lay a fucking egg
