Hey, I'm looking for some advice that is kind of particular to my country (the UK, and England specifically)
I'm from a working class background and a poor family, but I worked very hard at school and got into a top university. But i've run into some issues regarding the social culture here. Most people at my uni are middle/upper class and went to private school, and they're just so culturally different to me in every way, from the way they dress, to their hobbies, to the sports they enjoy (most of them like rugby and rowing, but I'm a football kind of bloke)
I'm finding that this is really hindering my ability to date successfully. I've recently got into using Tinder and have tried it out in both my uni town and my original home town when I come home for the holidays. I find that in my uni town, I get barely any matches, maybe one or two a week if I'm lucky. But when I come home for the holidays, I get like 10x more matches in my home town with the exact same pictures and bio. To me, this seems to indicate that the problem is with the uni girls, not with me.
Could anyone else from the UK (or elsewhere) who has dealt with these kind of problems help me out? Is it possible that girls at my uni aren't into me because I'm working class and from a poor family? Whereas girls in my hometown are fine with me because I'm just like them in terms of socio-economics?
Post your Tinder pictures jesus christ why're you making me ask?
Benjamin Phillips
I mean it's not really an issue with my pics. I'm doing just fine on tinder right now cause I'm home for the holidays. Just wondering why my tinder game is so much stronger here than at uni
Cooper Rogers
Just find a girl that has a fetish for commoners, m8. There's got to be at least one.
Aiden King
>Just wondering why my tinder game is so much stronger here than at uni Yeah. So post your pictures. You could be some fucking brownistan Bongian and being coy about it to save face when it could be the entire reason the city girls don't want your dick in them, or maybe you look like a classic inbred bongian which doesn't gel well with the upper class fucks.
Zachary Watson
I'm from a working class background, single mother in a relatively poor area. Ended up moving to London a few years back and landed a job in a company staffed largely by privately educated people. I fell for a girl in another office who was from that background too but pussied out of talking to her because I figured things were stacked against me.
What I would say is that in my experience, privately educated girls, especially those from upstanding British families, avoid things like Tinder like the plague. I've known a ton of "posh" girls and most have ended up marrying someone from the same socio-economic background. That said, I almost dated one because she thought I was posh too (kek), so my advice would be to dress smartly, pursue your studies in a mature and independent manner, and try to attend parties and such where these girls will be and will likely be interested in learning more about people outside their bubble.
Which uni are you at? I'm guessing Oxbridge, Newcastle or Durham?
Henry Price
Why are british people so autistic? It’s like you have your own caste system
Jonathan Morris
Alright mate, calm down with the racism
I'm a white guy. But the white working class like me are kind of the forgotten people of this country. I know black guys at my uni from similar backgrounds to mine but they get girls because posh white lasses think they're "exotic". Whereas I'm not exotic, I'm just a normal white guy, except I'm poor, which is obviously not attractive to rich girls
The thing is I really don't want to date a posh girl. I find their culture really boring and I couldn't stand having to marry into some family of plummy voiced gits who all vote Tory and send the kids to boarding school etc. I just want someone normal like me
It's retarded yeah, I hate this country desu senpai
Daniel Walker
Are you at least alpha? Posh chicks are generally more interested in LTRs and beta traits, but when they’re ovulating they wanna get RAMMED by a manly man even more than normal girls because they’re usually surrounded by prissy little fairie boys.
Camden Rivera
>I just want someone normal like me
What's the problem then? All those girls are rancid mate, and come with 10 times the baggage of a regular one
Isaac Gomez
I had no problem making friends and dating in several other states. Now I live in a very rich area in CA, and between work, school, and not "clicking" with people around here, I'm having the same problem. I'm finding that my personality and fundamental values are too different for me to get along on deeper levels with most people here. I found that I shouldn't date rich people unless they worked their way up from working or middle class for this reason. I'm just going to wait until school is over and move away from here. Dating and making friends isn't the only problem. The cost of housing is ridiculously high. We have people working 40 hours per week who can't afford rooms in some areas. I live in a god damned garage, and I'm lucky to have that.
Michael Gray
Which uni? I'm also at uni in the UK from a comfy middle class family. For what it's worth my tinder bio is edgy as fuck and I got some serious game with it. You will most likely never fully blend in with the upper class people but you've got a good chance of faking a middle class. Dress smart and drop any retarded regional accent.
My parents are from Pakistan so I'm your stereotypical Brit. I go to Cambridge and I honestly haven't had a problem despite going to public school and still no idea what the extra fork and spoon in a dining setting are for
Daniel Allen
Reading through this thread reminds me of all those british kitchen sink movies about the angry young men who fuck up a bunch of woman and get back at society for playing them a bad hand and making them poor.
But that was 50 years ago, i can't believe you guys still have such large social gaps with classes.
Aaron Moore
Well which uni do you go to m8
Hunter Walker
If women judge you by class at all, it will be the class you project now (as a student much like them), not where you came from.
And if it really matters to you, most of the trappings of "class", like sports, music tastes, hobbies and the like, can easily be picked up
Jacob Martin
You're not a Brit, you're still a poo skin. You and your parents should be deported
Luke Bailey
Born in UK = Brit
Elijah Carter
No user, he's right. I'm black and I was born here in the UK too. I used to think the same as you but I came to realise that it means nothing. Nobody will actually acknowledge you being british. Why do you think they ask you ''Where are you actually from??"
It why I never vote or discuss UK politics with anyone, I don't belong to this country I just live here. Funny thing is, if I got sent """back""" to Jamaica, they still wouldn't accept me lol.
tl;dr don't have have allegiance to this country, because it definitely has none for you I got to uni of Manchester a decent uni and there’s a lot of posh wankers here. What I noticed is that the most down to earth people are south East Asians or people that are actually from Manchester. I hope that helps
Adrian Perez
>i can't believe you guys still have such large social gaps with classes.
EVERYTHING in Britain is about class. It is unlike any other country in the first world in that regard.
Everything from the way you speak, to the clothes you wear, the media you enjoy, the friends you have, to your name, is indicative of your class. And your class is indicative of your worth in Britain.
People are divided more by class than by geography or race in the UK. People commonly regard the north of England and Scotland as more impoverished and disadvantaged than the south and London, but this isn't universal. For instance there are plenty of upper middle/upper class people in those regions who go to private school and adopt a "received pronunciation" accent. For instance former prime minister Tony Blair is actually Scottish, but has a refined English accent because he is upper class.
If you don't go to private school in Britain, or have some form of familial connections to wealth and prestige, then you're basically fucked. You will never amount to anything because the game is rigged against you from the start. There is no "British Dream" like there is an "American Dream". It's to the extent that the British working classes actually revile wealth and have no desire to attain it, because they know they have no chance. The wealth and power is horded by a small percentage of the population who, in most cases, can be traced all the way back to the Norman royalty that conquered England alongside William the Conqueror in 1066.
Adrian Barnes
expect a pump and dump.
Bentley Nguyen
only bongs could ask questions like this
I'm so sorry you had to be born there
William Gray
This is all true, but missing the point that mobility between classes is also incredibly difficult, and money alone isn't enough to achieve it. Say you're born into a working class family in the North - no matter what you do in life, you will still be a lower-class northerner - you can mask your accent (as many do), but it still won't be the native easiness of born and raised RP; you can make as much money as like in whatever profession, but you won't have the inherited cultural knowledge in music, art, cuisine, dining, etc which distinguishes the upper-middle classes; you won't have gone to the right schools and met the right people who'll be working in the same industry as you; you won't know how to dress in the 'correct' way which connotes an easy disdain for money whilst also signifying wealth.
And, furthermore, if you try to adapt to all these things (and some try, and some do quite well at masking their roots), you'll be looked down on as a parvenu by the class you're trying to join (kicking down the ladder; there's only so many good jobs in London and places at little darling Ophelia's public school), whilst also being ostracised by the lower class you're trying to leave ('you think you're better than us now?' - 'what are you putting on 'airs' for?').
If you're black or female this can be compensated for with implicit affirmative action etc and you can even make a career out of your 'struggle' (see: Guardian journos, the BBC nowadays), but I truly feel sorry for poor working class white boys, who have no 'leg up' whatsoever
Social class in Britain is damned toxic, at least in my opinion and experience (anyone who denies the importance of it is either lying or ignorant). My advice? Get a good degree and emigrate
