Should I send a final message to a girl who ghosted me?

>Why are you apologizing for her?
It's a statement of fact. Who the fuck knows why she's ghosting you? You going around spouting this off:
>I also want to let her know that I could've resolved any issue
Are you fucking 17 or something? This is completely selfish + you've got better things to do than chase damaged goods.

Just move on! You’re more of an attention whore than she is.

I haven't actually sent her any messages, besides 1 which I sent two weeks after she ghosted me, just me telling her not to listen to her fears or worries, since she was posting suicidal shit.

After this then she started sub-tweeting for me to show her my 'cuteness in a traumatizing way' and other attention whoring shit aimed at me. I didn't react to any of it.

Should I withdraw from sending her a final message until she messages me or do I just ghost her back whilst moving on? Bare in mind I actually like this girl even if she is fucked up.

Ghost, delete, do not think about her, etc.

>Bare in mind I actually like this girl even if she is fucked up.
This changes my advice.

You need to get rid of this mentality:
>I also want to let her know that I could've resolved any issue
It is not your job to help her. Damaged people do not want to be pitied, they just want to be treated as normal. Don't message her, let her come to you. If she does? Just get back into the swing of things. Don't make it weird. Joke about what you two normally joked about. Talk about what you two normally talked about. She'll let you know right quick if she's romantically interested or not with flirty tones or language. Then just flirt back and escalate accordingly. If SHE brings up her problems first, go ahead and listen and probe. But don't ask her
>Hey what's wrong? Why'd you ghost me?
It makes her think she's letting you down.

Whoops, this was unclear:
>But don't ask her "hey what's wrong? Why'd you ghost me?
UNLESS she brings up her shit first. Don't ask this shit out of the blue.

it's pathetic to let her ghost me and not say anything about it, i have to at least leave looking like i know her game and won't tolerate it.

m8, either you like her and respect her decision, or you just want to get equal. You can't have both.

>Why is this nice guy shit?
Because being understanding to someone who ghosts you is what a nice guy would do. If a guy stopped responding to your texts and removed you from Facebook, would you message him with a similar message?

>You think I should disqualify her for her depression then in order to remove the nice guy perception and let her chase me?
Yes. I would "wait" for her to message you again in the future and then act uninterested and almost as if she's bothering you, because you're doing something more interesting at the moment than talking with her. Usually works on headcases that do this thing.

She ghosted me for a week after saying she loves me a few weeks before this happened actually. She said she was attracted to me but she saw it as a problem because of her mental health and distance. I told her everything would be ok and she agreed.

I admit, I was a little too intense, because I was infatuated, but she pursued me like she was my soulmate so I couldn't help it ... I thought she was innocent.

If my friend did it, yeah I would. I am in love with her and she was being vulnerable to me. When I see that I reflect how I would feel if I was her and act based on that. If I was suicidal and fell in love with a girl but then 'ghosted them' out of fear or whatever then I'd want to be cared for, if I didn't send that one message she might've thought I didn't give a shit about her. See how it works both ways? Imagine if I didn't even acknowledge it so she justifies this as me 'not giving a fuck about her', then everybody would be saying 'its your fault for not showing care'.

>I admit, I was a little too intense, because I was infatuated
So relax and wait and treat her as normal if she comes back. Good luck.

Thank you. I guess that defuses the games she plays, but shouldn't I acknowledge it in a less 'Hey why did you do this blatantly immoral thing to me like you could get away with it' type way about the ghosting?

The ghosting was about her, not about you. You need to reconcile whether or not you like her enough to forgive it, because she's obviously not well. If you can't, don't attempt to get back with her because then you have a kernel of distrust in the back of your mind that will sprout into a tree; it will not be a healthy relationship for either of you.

>not about you.

she made it about me when she love bombed me and then posted creepy subtweets that i should essentially traumatize her.

>because she's obviously not well
because she is impulsive and lacks willpower, maybe she should be more submissive. tough love.

m8 you either like her, or you're burned and just want to get even. You can't have both, because having both makes you petulant and will not be healthy for anyone.

>she made it about me when she love bombed me and then posted creepy subtweets that i should essentially traumatize her.
Like I said,
> because she's obviously not well
You can accept this as a fault on her part and forgive it, or try and get back at her and push her away. But you absolutely cannot have both. It sounds like you're looking for someone to tell you
>Yeah, man! What a bitch! Tell her how she hurt you!
But the reality is you just move on. Don't you have any hobbies? Any interests outside of her? This is unhealthy that you're fixated on her so.

i want to gain power over her but not for nefarious reasons. i'm willing to feign apathy and invalidate her a lil to get this, because in the long run it will be good for us.

i haven't messaged her since. i've been out everyday. i disconnected from social media for 3 fucking weeks. i think about her every day. i remember how manipulative she was, she would say things like 'our minds are connected' and how only we understand each other. her quirks make me uniquely attracted to her but she went the extra fucking mile by saying shit like that. im not going to tell her how she 'hurt me'. i wouldnt do that. id just tell her that im done with her and maybe make a joke about it, as a way to have the upper hand.

im going to listen to your advice though and not send anything, but im saying this to double check.

>Like I said,
>> because she's obviously not well

i'm unwell too and i don't do that. i don't mind a bit of darkness together, it can be nice, but i never tried to do that with her, it seemed as if she wanted me to, and now i regret not showing her my dark side, which is weird i know, i did the healthy advice that a million different people told me to do and all it's gotten me is 'you did the right thing' and 'typical nice guy beta' like i should've been omnipotent of what an impulsive, fickle mentally ill person thinks and wants.

>If I was suicidal and fell in love with a girl but then 'ghosted them' out of fear or whatever then I'd want to be cared for, if I didn't send that one message she might've thought I didn't give a shit about her. See how it works both ways?
It sounds like you're being tested, which is toxic and unhealthy. It's one thing to withdraw and not initiate conversations, other is to ignore and ghost. Women have pulled this shit on me for years, including using social anxiety as a "get out of jail" card for ghosting and being inconsiderate.

>i remember how manipulative she was, she would say things like 'our minds are connected' and how only we understand each other.

She's starting to sound more and more fucked as this goes on, man. Take a long look at whether or not she's worth it, because now I'm not so sure. Only you can know. If she's not worth it, I maintain you go no contact. Sounds like she did a number on you. I gotta get to bed, but I hope things work out for you.

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goodnight bro thanks for the help

they're testing me without even giving me a chance to respond -- and they expected me to respond aggressively to their attention whoring instead as if it would be me putting them in their 'place' so they stay.

it's inconsiderate and they're too comfortable doing that. i wish i didn't validate them by saying i liked them back, but that's toxic in itself.

>they're testing me without even giving me a chance to respond -- and they expected me to respond aggressively to their attention whoring instead as if it would be me putting them in their 'place' so they stay.
Wishful thinking. Do you think they would test Chad? If you were in a semi-famous rock band, would she ghost?

Goddamn OP you are the one with mental problems, no wonder she ran and hid.

you think rockstars don't get divorced or cheated on? women don't give a fuck about status, it's about the mental, they test to make sure you are 'chad', having money won't get you girls if you have no charisma.

how?

Read your OP and all your replies and you are fucking nuts. It is clear to her too. She may have even tried to hang in there but you're just too much a risk so she has done the wise thing. I just hope she doesn't allow you back in, you'll resort to physical violence ultimately to get your way.

nah, the strategy is amoral, they don't care about you either. most people are heartless, i have a heart and i don't hurt people, i just one up them to prevent games. i didn't actually fuck with them, so you can leave your accusations away from me.

Its not an accusation but an informed observation, she knows and likely other people too. You can be whatever to whomever for any reason you cook up in your mind but people will run and hide. I would and she should.

I see why you think it. You would rather me be without defence and get walked on then fight back. Even though this is a self defense situation in terms of ego, you still talk to me like i'm the aggressor. I haven't hurt anyone