>So when are you gonna get a girlfriend, user?
how do you react?
So when are you gonna get a girlfriend, user?
>when I meet someone I like lol
Done.
Being from where I am I wonder if people think I'm gay. I'm 27 and never had a gf, so no contact with girls in general unless they're family.
Dive in deeper. They are poking fun or just being playful either way I'd probably be offended so just dive into it and have a good time.
"when they stop laughing at my penis"
"when I start to enjoy their company after sex"
"when he finally says yes to dressing like a girl"
"when I stop moaning if they touch my leg"
"my teacher said she's down but I have to graduate first"
"it does matter the doctor said I can't have kids"
I switch it up usually
Sorry, I am dying alone.
"I'll tell you just before I do."
''When I meet a woman who deserves more than just my nut.''
Topic closed.
>You have a boring life.
"You know my fucking last relationship was awful and all you fuckers ever do is fight anyways, so probably never. Now tell my little shitflinging nephews to go fuck around in the yard or something, they're awful."
This! Solid advice that screams I'm still unstable. They will love it!
yeah that's a cool thing to say to your family
Just be blunt and honest. They'll appreciate your confidence and self-awareness.
>validation
How can I get validation without getting a gf ? Are there alternative ? I just want to stop feeling so fucking worthless, and someone seeing me as a romantic partner would really change how I look at myself.
>You know what, maybe I'll just bring one of those body pillows to next Christmas.
My brother's answer
You will never ever get anywhere in life that you want to be, if you need other people to validate you so badly
soon times senpai bless
Where do other people get validation? They clearly dont have to resort to masturbatory self-validation in order to believe that they're good people.
Holy shit dude learn to love yourself. I use to hate myself so much, looked in the right places and now if I could kiss myself when I wake up I fucking would
>They clearly don't fund their own validation, thereby no longer needing to rely on others in order to exist
Yeah, nobody does that...
It's funny, the only thing holding me back is my past. I don't want anyone to know what I did/didn't do or why I did/didn't do things. Nobody would understand, they would just blame me for everything. I guess you wouldn't know unless you lived in my shoes and went through life like I did.
It's not where do you get it. It's just not needing it all together.
I dont understand.
>have zero indication that anyone even wants you around
>not turn into an antisocial wreck
Pick one
Accept that it happened. Accept that it was a mistake and make sure you learn from it and grow from it. Take responsibility don't hide from your mistakes it makes you a coward. Things happen good people make bad mistakes. Bad people will live till they are 105. Life happens
... they buy hookers? I'm still not understanding where all this confidence is supposed to come from with no feedback loop.
It's a little harsh, but the first time I said it, the questions stopped. I didn't say anything about my cousins.
Truth is, all sides of my family are on the brink of divorce and are never happy, so it's funny that they want to push me to have a girlfriend and kids.
How do I stop people from dismissing me over it
how did you learn to love yourself famalam?
Maybe work on yourself and understand/figure out why people don't enjoy your company and work on it. Or don't and accept that you are who you are and you can't change and learn to enjoy your own company. Try dating websites if you need someone in your life so desperately. If you like who you are let shit sort its self out
Communicate that it was a different person if they don't want to understand that or can't forgive you for it. That's it, thats all you can do. You have to move on and meet new people
To each their own but I did research on learning what the point of life was blah blah blah searching for a reason to wake up everyday since there was no point to being alive. Typical 20 y/o shit honestly. I found my awnser and it snowballed out of control I started to like people more and less. I chose friends better I care less when people offend me or do something just for the sake of hurting me. I have no feelings when negative stuff comes my way and I love the positives. Life's pretty cool man just gotta see why
Wow this sure is choc full of actionable advice.
Well it's subjective I doubt what helped me will help you. I did a lot of research on what causes depression and anxiety and that helped me out a bit. I did therapy for a few years. I was on medication for a bit and that helped jump start some stuff. Idk what advice you want, you just gotta analyze your situation find what you want to change about yourself then work towards it and the best way I was able to accomplish that was through books and learning
WHY do you need other people so fucking badly?
Nobody's gonna want to have someone so helpless hanging off their coattails all day and night, man
Why do you always act like normal people dont ever talk to anyone else and are stoic mountains of irrational self assurance when that's not true at all and the average person has not only am extensive support network of friends and family who will reassure them but also a romantic partner who will always make sure they know that no matter what happens there is one person who will always have their back through anything and everything, no matter how bad things get.
You're asking me why my empty, smoking engine needs so much oil so badly when everyone else is normally running around with at least 6 quarts.
What have you done for people to like you? Are you fun to be around or something?
If you're a shit person nobody likes then you just won't get a gf.
Honestly you make a good point but you and the people you are arguing or whatever with won't understand one another because it's too hard to explain your living conditions and different life experiences to get a solid awnser if there even is a definite one
I just say "I dunno." But in reality I don't think it's a matter of when.
Everyone deals with shit and everyone has to put in the work to overcome their flaws. As long as you sit here in this "everyone else had it easy" box, there's nothing I can say to you. You're a victim in your own head and that's just what you'll be forever until you get out of that mentality.
I could tell you all about my life and how I overcame it but unless you have identical problems it won't help, and you'll probably just brush it off anyway. Besides which, everyone on Jow Forums who hears my tale just goes into damage control and says "you can't judge people just because your life sucked!!1"
Either fix your own shit or sit there and pray a MAGIKAL GRRL comes and fixes everything for you. I don't care which you choose really, but you're gonna be doing a lot of bitching if you think anyone on Earth is going to take some deep gratification in fixing your flaws for you.
>Everyone deals with shit and everyone has to put in the work to overcome their flaws.
Yes, and they had a support network to help them through it. I don't think you're listening. Where can I get the same support that most people take for granted
I had no such network. People hated me. All I did was bitch about how hard life (middle school) was, how people were shitty and how life was boring and shitty and everything else.
After hearing enough times that I was annoying, I resolved to work at it myself, to catch myself. Of course, the result is I bottle up a lot more than I expected but I'm also working on that (though now with that support).
But I spent a good handful of years through school being shitty and being treated like shit. I just changed something because unlike you, I started inside for change and didn't expect people to like me for it, I worked my ass off whole having no friends and family at home that never wanted to hear my shit. Nobody wanted to be around me until I figured my shit out.
My shit was rocked upside down because my dad died when I was young, what's your poison? Cuz that's what I got to overcome as a fucking teenager.
Do you want others to fix your life for you?
No, I want support so I can have the strength to do it myself. No man is an island.
It sounds like you've done nothing yourself except whine about how nobodys there for you. What would the magic support network do to help you anyway?
I dont even have a specific issue to solve anymore. What happened to me is barely even relevant anymore after over a decade, if still incredibly embarrassing. I'm just fucking sick of having to go alone through everything, no matter what it is. "Go alone with pride" my ass. Let this bitch of a ruck march end.
I get asked this all the time by various friends and family. I get told by most people I know that I'm quite a good looking guy but I guess I don't have very many interactions with women on a daily basis.
>Easier said than done
>When I actually get a chance
>Pfff
>Fuck off
>When hell freezes over if you've been paying attention to my track record
Jesus, guy.
>No man is an island.
But every man should strive to be one.
Moral support? Same as everyone? "You can do it, we believe in you?" "Hey I saw you had a shit day, come over and let's smoke and talk it?" "You're still a good person?" Like what does a hug even fucking feel like lmao, I'm literally over here just sitting on my ass for months while my plans grind onward like fucking molasses and I can't do a fucking thing in the meantime. You know how long its gonna take to complete my current step? Ten months. Ten fucking months of sitting on my fucking ass before I can even do anything else. Its fucking infuriating. Ten years it's been like this, this fucking hurry up and wait horseshit where I spend months or even years just sitting waiting for the sun to crest between my fucking boulders just fucking right so I can finally take one more fucking step forward and wait another god damned 9 months for the fucking stars to align, and I dont wanna hear any bullshit about "well you gotta get out and make things happen" because that's what I'm fucking doing, you can't do anything in one fucking afternoon, building a life takes massive fucking amounts of time and theres not a fucking thing you can do to get around that. After that? I have to save up TWENTY FUCKING THOUSAND DOLLARS. How fucking long am I gonna have to wait for THAT? And through the entire time, I dont get to talk to fucking anyone about any of it. I dont get to vent. I dont get to let off steam. I don't get fucking anything that I dont claw out of the fucking dirt and hammer into shape by hand. I'm sick of it. All I want is to hear those three little words.
ur a bitch
Go fuck yourself.
You are clearly having a moment and maybe rightfully so but if you do want help don't come here. This has just progressed into you getting more and more upset. There a better places to get advice and help you. This is a place to ask shit but take the responses with a grain of salt
No one asks me that any more. They know I've given up.
Hey good luck user I hope some crazy events lead to your romantic success
I'm just tired, man.
Either way you are in a tough spot and I hope it get better
The shit that happens to us isn't important. The way you look at it is. I was homeless, lost both of my parents, and was dead weight on society for most of the first 20 years of my life.
I don't think about a single lick of it on the day to day. My demon is a shitty reductionist philosophy that strips meaning and value from everything. Put anyone else through the circumstances of my life though and they'd be a news story, in an adult care facility, or at the end of a rope.