How's relationship with your father?
How's relationship with your father?
He's heavily narcissistic and controlling, so I moved out. He's well-off but doesn't want to support my studies (which are cheap, but not to a poorfag like me), because I moved out and gained independence.
It really hurt always hearing his belittling comments, guilt trips and demotivating speeches, moving out was the best decision.
Same here user. It sucks, but you did the best thing for yourself. Be free.
>He's well-off but doesn't want to support my studies (which are cheap, but not to a poorfag like me), because I moved out and gained independence
«He doesn't want to support me since I got independent and it's his fault.» This is comedy goldmine.
And exactly how is this funny?
He remarried and has ignored me for years. He's basically a stranger to me these days, I don't know anything about his life or what he does.
Nearly nonexistent. We talk like 3 time per year on phone. Occassionaly I get a mail from him criticising/deriding/accusing me, as usual.
Sorry to hear.
If I may ask why do you still hold any contact with him? Why not cut it off completely?
Are you seriously asking this?
Yes of course, I'd like to know
Shared email with my mom. Besides, I still co-own some properties with my family so until I get out of that completely it wouldn't be prudent to cut all contact.
What do you need advice on?
Okay, I will bite.
From where do you come from being entitled to his help? Just cause he can afford it? Or because he is your dad? Do you know what «independent» means? You beat your chest proclaiming how independent you are yet in the same paragraph you deride your dad for not helping you. That's what's funny.
When you have children, you are *supposed* to support them. Of course in some countries there are not many legal obligations past 18, but it is an act of decency to do so.
If you can't/don't want to fund your children's education, don't have any. If you think you can have children without needing to support them you are the entitled (and mildly impaired) one.
He wants me to get laid but never talked about girls or how to act during all my life
Plus he still thinks I have chance to meet someone while being a 24yo 5'6 virgin.
Kind of live in the past, he talks about making an acc on meetic (while it's dead especially for young people) or girls caring about personnality.
We live ten minutes away from each other, but have agreed to cut contact after a physical altercation. Haven’t spoken in over a year. Hope he’s well.
I can't put my finger on what my problem is with my dad. I love him but I think our personalities and values clash too often.
Pretty good. He has a lot of kids and his idea of parenting is buying stuff for his kids so he never really gave me emotional support growing up and he was kind of distant.
I lived with him for a few years after graduating high school and we grew closer.
However he's a raging misogynist who spends every weekend at the bar.
Dude, that's only done in the east. In the west, parents tell their 3 year old kids "You want that chocolate? Well, you're gonna have to earn it!" (hamplanet parents not included). Why do you think so many students are escorting these days?
In the west it is expected that parents help with your post-high school education. If your parents make too much the government won't help you pay for college, even if your parents refuse to help you.
and are right
and is a remedial.
> goy your parents don't own you anything!
People like this make bad parents
he up and left randomly when I was a kid, came back a year later and was weekend dad. then I moved in with him and I was practically a ghost, he just watched a lot of tv and played those stupid Facebook games. every time I wanted to do something he would put a fit up about driving places so unless my friends came over I didn't do anything. constantly protected his girlfriend's stupid drama and always chose her over us because he didn't want to be alone.
now I'm expected to forget all about it so we can have the perfect relationship.
He's an autist, but at least he's around.
couldnt be better. he died when i was 4 and i got like 180k from the life insurance settlement.
He died when I was 10. At least now I'm treating other dads' cancer, so fewer kids have to go through what I did.
He's dead to me. Growing up he was an abusive piece of shit. I cut off contact with him when I became an adult. Due to family pressure and that tired ass emphasis on "family" I started talking to him again. He basically joined a cult now and believes in all sorts of magical goofy bullshit. Went back to never interacting with him.
My dad was a schizophrenic, alcoholic violent paedophile cunt. He molested and abused me and I was put into care at the age of 6 (and 9 months)
Last night googled him and learned he could be dead. Nice
Same, man. The fact that he refuses to help with my studies is one thing - I don't even want money from him, to be honest - but he also refuses to support my sister who is seventeen and still in high school. Our mother is dead, so she can't help, either. What he's doing is illegal, but the authorities in this shithole of a country don't care, so I basically have to support my sister on top of paying for my own expenses. It sucks.
Could be. I made a thread...
idk how to confirm it, won't the authorities need proof he was my dad? Also he potentially died 3 years ago, no next of kin located so if he did have anything it has probably been liquidated.
I want my reparation money cash goods
call the coroners office in the county you think he died and just explain the situation, I'm sure he would just believe you. since he was probably found by the police the coroner will have examined him. I don't think deaths are on a need to know basis anyway. you're right about him having nothing, dying with no next of kin means your assets go to uncle sam
Mine is decent, but there are deep issues neither of us want to understand or discuss.
Tell more pls
>means your assets go to uncle sam
I'm a brit lad. It says nothing has been passed to a treasury solicitor so I doubt he had anything.
I'd call the council in which the public funeral record is, but what to say? "Hi, I believe my dad died 3 years ago?"
I pray men like you never become a father
Not him, but why? He was making fun of the "we dont owe u son" mentality
I guess I took his post too seriously
He is under the impression I have Asperger's or autism because I was alone through high school. There are other things, but essentially, he rarely considers the feelings of others when doing things.
Holy shit, I wonder if my dad has fucking Asperger's.
>deep issues neither of us want to understand or discuss
>he considers me a beta
That's it? Your old man «not considering your feelings»? Get your shit together son.
I need to see him more often...
Did you just bait me so you could make yourself feel better? My shit is together. The man has a degree in psychology. He knows the difference between beta and Asperger's.
Realizing something and acting upon it are two different things. Your dad may have psych degree but that doesn't stop him from being an asshole, does it?
If you actually had your shit together you would
>not characterize your relationship as «deep issues»
>not being offended by how he treats you
>stand up for yourself
Some things aren't for the internet. There's more here. I'm not going to help you analyze a complicated relationship through a Liberian goldsmithing forum.
Non-existent. Havent seen or spoken to him in 14 years. Piece of shit led a double life with another family for 8 years before the inevatible divorce. I heard he divorced his second wife too and is now on his third. My mother is no good either. Fucking family of crooks and liars.
I don't speak or see him. I plan on not even knowing when he's dead. Other than that we tight.
He's been dead for twenty years. I was eight.
Fuck that. Let him twist in the wind.
Great. I see him every week and we go hiking. He's turning 72 this year and I'm going to miss him when he's gone. He's still in great shape for his age (we go hiking, not many 72 year olds have the joints or wind for it) but the end for him is approaching.
He was very strict on us growing up, and while my brother tolerated it, I was a rebellious little shit who broke his rules and resented him for many years. I'm happy that's over now.
Cherish that shit man because a lot of us don't even know what it is like to have a dad at all.
decent, he works 80 hours a week though and i'm scared about losing him from being overweight. He's a bit in his own world though and it seems like he is slowly becoming distant from reality.
I feel like i'm the less loved child though, my brother is doing really well in uni while i dropped out after 1 year. Like i'm stable and not a burden but i just have less in common with my parents and it shows with the get togethers.
shit, neither of my parents were ever really there for me as a kid. I've not called them "mum" or "dad" since I was like 4. My dad must be bi-polar or something because he'd randomly chimp out at me over tiny shit so I learned to not speak unless absolutely necessary and generally avoid people people and conflict. I've never told him a secret or asked him for advice.
He used to be a low tier mobster and currently works in high management for a popular regional chain of restaraunt, probably going to become an owner soon and make good money. He's compassionate but demanding, and sometimes displays the violence of his past in ways he doesn't realize. He left that behind a long time ago though.
A lot of people are afraid of my father but I love him. He is my kin, even if I am an opposite of his personality I still inherited his ambition and we share a strong bond through this.
>thinks he can't get laid
The only reason you think this is because you limit yourself from shit self confidence m8. Just get yourself together and start flirting. 24 is still relatively young
Awkward. We get along ok and we have a casual connection through discord but otherwise we have never really been close, he was an old school parent who would break out the belt if I did anything wrong and had a lot of anger issues that he took out on me and my mom. He tries to make up for it halfheartedly and I accept it, but will probably never be a daddy's girl.
My mom is a stepford smiler through all of it but I vowed to find a husband who would never be a father like him, which I thankfully did.
Do you call your husband daddy?
I would take a bullet for my dad
No, I tried it for a little bit but always internally cringed when I did. Definitely not into that aspect of the ddlg scene.
I'd put a bullet in mine.
not even mad bro
Pretty good, I call him everyday. I am sad that he is letting himself get fat and not workin out. He is in his mid 50s now
Pretty solid, can effectively communicate what's going on and he's pretty supportive as far as giving me advice and whatnot. Helpful dude.
pretty good actually
Shit desu, he doesn't care at all about my grades, but he makes 14k a month, lives in the most expensive neighborhood, even if that means that I have no room and hate it there. He also forced us (I live with my mom) to move out of the apartment we had, why? For money