Why am I surrounded by beta orbiters?

I have trouble maintaining friendships in general
I tend to find I have trouble relating to women, especially (and I am a woman)

But literally 85-95% of men I meet and talk to, even on neutral places, end up developing secret thing for me and pining after me

How the fuck do I make friends without creating beta orbiters?

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I think there is a misconception here that a guy with feelings for you that acts on them is a "beta-orbiter." Most betas keep their feelings pent up inside.

Not sure what else to say though, except just have some patience. Where are you meeting these guys?

They're not "beta orbiters" you dumb slut. Quit the Jow Forums mindset and you'll be on the good track for starters.

What do you have to offer as a friend? Is it better than what you could potentially offer as a partner? Cause if you're a hot chick, unless you're extraordinarily funny or you've got some particular talents or you're incredibly interesting to talk to, I'd rather make a move on you and have a chance to bang you than stay your friend.

You can always tell your new friends that you aren’t looking for partner just a friend.
Tell them you’ve had guys fall for you and it’s not what you’re looking for
They’ll either understand and won’t do anything, ghost you if all they were looking for was a lay or think you’re playing hard to get.
Either way it seems you’re still fucked

>85-95% of men I meet
Is that number of men in the single digits? Either you put yourself in environments with a lot of those kinds of guys or you're misinterpreting them.

I don't have many opportunities to meet people outside

Sorry. I don't go on r9k
When I say beta orbiter, I mean guys that despise my SO and disparage him every chance they get, while trying to cross emotional boundaries with me/get too close

I am a hot chick. I'm what most guys would continue waifu material, in looks and personality

Should I just seclude myself and take on a male alias?

They usually reassure me that they just want to be friends, but then continue being shitty about my SO

Its well into double digits over the years

>When I say beta orbiter, I mean guys that despise my SO and disparage him every chance they get, while trying to cross emotional boundaries with me/get too close

Oooh ok sorry. That's not what people usually have in mind when they say beta orbiter. Yeah if they know you are already with someone and they're being pieces of shit like that they're not the kind of person you'd want to be friends with anyway.
Would you actually want to be friends with other women and you can't manage or would you rather make male friends?

The curse of being hot but not vapid. You're going to get a lot of guys trying to become friendly with you as a stepping stone to asking you out.

My advice is to wear a false wedding band. It's not perfect and will have flaws of it's own, but should cut down on the number of guys doing this by a fair bit.

Its* own. Dumbass phone.

I'm actually married though
I talk about it like incessantly

Even if it's true, don't flatter yourself.
And stop making guy friends online. They're only interested in one thing. That's why they're online and so invested in you. A male larp would be a good idea.

If you wear the ring publicly then I dunno what to tell you.

I just want to make friends I can lean on without them constantly suggesting that I might be sad because my husband sucks and
"Haha, you wouldn't be bored around me ;)"
type shit

Wanna be friends, user?

Tried calling them out on their shit, telling them that they aren't the first assholes to try this and won't be the last?

I take the tone to a more serious thing and I'm like
"Probably not, but hey.
I'm serious about my husband, stop shittalking him. I love him"

And they backpedal
"Oh, no, I didn't mean- no, just a joke"
then ghost

Accept that you cannot make male friends unless they're gay. You can never become too deep with the opposite gender, as it always leads to feelings, unless you're ugly as shit. It's happened to me, I've seen it happen. If it doesn't happen, it's just apparent friendship, or there's a disaster on the brewing.

I'll be your friend, user.

I'm biscum, but I don't want to be with a woman.

Yeah, well that's the part that sucks about being a woman online. If you're looking for male friends a good rule of thumb would be to avoid the guys that take immediate interest in you, they're just white-knights trying to get to get a slice of cherry pie.

Talk to the ones that are indifferent to your gender or try to ignore you. I know it sounds weird but those are the normal people.


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You should wear neutral clothes and become ugly in order to make male friends.

And when making male friends online do not reveal your gender.

Looks like I'm making friends with gay guys.


No, fuck, Not 'friends'
Someone I can talk to when shit has hit the fan who won't try to convince me to send nudes, or buy me a ticket to wherever you live

And yeah
I like Jow Forums because I have to try hard to point out I'm a woman, or else I'm assumed to be male. Its great

You could try saying you're a lesbian.

I already stopped wearing makeup, fuck

Not gay. Just prefer men.


Ah fuck you spoiler tags.

It happens
Works for me


It, uh. It's up there.

I'm blind, sorry

>waaah why wont men give me everything I want without me giving anything in return
Be glad people find any amount of worth in you sweetie

Kik is asap_smoyan

I don't have kik
Do you have discord?

I don't find worth in myself half the time

ANd I don't want nothing in return
I'll listen to your life stuff, too
ANd maybe play vidya with

I don't want nothing. I want companionship


Stop meeting guys online

Your boyfriend might actually be an asshole. Not sure either way but if you bitch about him all the time people will think he sucks and is no good for you.

I am a girl. Lets see if I get along with you, I get told alot of times I am the type of girl everyone gets along with, even those kind of people who say they dont like other bitches do like me. :)

My issue is basically completely different, I like a guy, but I am not sure if he likes me at all. He is in the fashion and art industry and basically SURROUNDED by models. No joke.
It makes me cry every day, I tried everything but OMG it does not want to work out.

Create a clear "no go zone". Even if it's a lie, claim you have kids and talk about a guy that you're absolutely enamored with and are engaged to, even wear a fake engagement ring and claim that he's away alot of the time on buisness trips and that's why these guys never see him.

Oh no, that super sucks

Yes, lets talk
Do you have discord?

You again... What are you up to, my little predator?...

It's just a fact of life. My gf has this problem. She's really pretty but prefers male friends on the more autistic side of personalities and it's just plain cause and effect. If you relate with guys, they gonna pine. Especially if you pick less romantically successful.

Please stop.
I'm this user. I'm trying to fix my shit, I'm miserable and don't have a lot going for me
I'm trying to meet people so I don't have to focus on how bad I want to die.

I see. I was the dude who talked about there being no expiry date on suicide attempts, so to go for the bettering your life option first.

Good luck out there.

Thanks user

>Accept that you cannot make male friends unless they're gay.
Eh, as a guy, my problem with making friends with girls were that if they were single, they always assumed I was into them. I just wanted platonic friends that weren't assholes and I could talk about more emotional stuff without dealing with dominance games. But that was between ages 15-21.

If I tried to befriend someone and they started talking about their boyfriend, I would get annoyed as well. I don't know him. I don't want to know him. Plus, I always assumed the boyfriend would look at me as an enemy, as a threat, so I wouldn't want to befriend them either. I know they would put me down and make jokes about me, instead of being cool. Quite frankly, if I was dating someone, and I knew they were talking with a guy, I would be concerned as well. I wouldn't be able to trust the dude.

>How the fuck do I make friends without creating beta orbiters?
Talk only about hobbies and interests and not your personal life or emotional stuff. Most men assume that talking about emotional problems means you feel close to them, because men very rarely talk genuinely about emotional stuff with each other.

Frankly, if any of my close friends with whom I connect on a deeper level were a hot chick, I'd be dying to band them, especially the intelligent and passionate ones who are into art and sciences.

Bang them*