How do I get my guy friend to understand that I want to be more than friends?
I ask him to go places with me all the time like out to restaraunts and stuff and try go drop hints I'm into him, like making flirty comments and shifting the conversation to his any my appearance, but he just doesnt get it. Last time we were out we were having a good time and stuff like usual, but I felt like I'd try and make a move and make it obvious. We were walking home and we got to where our paths split, in stead of saying bye like normal I just turned and stared at him to give him the opportunity to kiss me, in stead he just gave me a weird look and saud bye. I felt like shit after that and so embarrassed.
>walking home with girl >get to where we usually say goodbye and split up >all of the sudden she just stops talking and stares at me with a really uncomfortable expression on her face >ohfuckohfuckohfuck.jpeg >what did I do? Was it something I said >awkwardly say bye and bail >feel like shit >go home and jerk off to anime girls because I don't creep them out Did I blow it guys?
don't be embarrassed, it happens to most of us and as a guy, i can confirm we are complete idiots to the opposite sex's feelings. my advice is when you have a chance talk, and a lot. about feelings, about how he feels, about how you feel, but don't explode everything in one go, do it just like you're hinting your emotions communicate them in steps . communication is key and it could avoid a lot of hurt. good luck!
Be outward and open about it. It's not easy to read what you think are "signals." You're trying way too hard to be subtle with something where the guy has literally been taught the opposite by most people, that friends can't be romantic interests.
The "friendzone" is a major thing guys worry about, and if this guy likes you, he's probably concerned he's going to act on a silly crush and lose you entirely. It's what happens to guys.
Listen senpai. You need to stop "dropping hints".
I am a guy. I have never picked up on hints. I mean never, seriously. If you hang out all the time, and if you enjoy eachothers company, literally tell him. Hints will never work, honestly.
Just tell him, seriously
>I like this guy >but I don't want to make a move >I want him to make a move >why won't he make a move?
Why not just make a move?
Because women. Them uterus havers dumb. Nuff said.
If there's anything I know it's that men understand words, not signals. Use words to convey that you would like it if he kissed you. Jesus Christ why do women have to resort to this signs bullshit it's a person not a mime
Goddamnit user you sperg...it's all ogre now
Suck his dick
say "i want to be more than friends"
seems pretty fucking obvious to me
Send him feet pics
See the sad part is that I made that post as a joke, but if it actually happened I don't think I would know any better.
What you think are hints are probably not registering as such to him. Stop expecting him or for that matter other people to just know what you want based on some hint, that's ineffective communication and you'll only frustrate yourself while blaming others, children do that. Just tell him.
That's cute OP, I get a tingling feeling when I hear stories of women that want to be more than friends with their male friends but don't know how. Well in the end just know it could go either way.
Let me tell you this, what you did is something a girl did to me at some point. She stared at me with a fairly cheesy looking smile and I didn't know how to respond so I said hi and opened the door for her and let her go inside the classroom. The moment she went in I ran. I had clues from her and guessed she liked me since before then but this kind of took the cake. I think I would've been more comfortable if she would've just asked me if I had a girlfriend and if I would be open to having one. I would've rejected her low key and I'm sure things would've been less weird around us.
Not sure what to say, the guy sounds like he did the same thing but why not just ask him? Believe me, I hate being the one rejecting and I know what it's like to feel rejection so if I know a woman doens't look like she's even remotely interested in me I won't bother getting close.
I obviously can't be super open about it and be like "hey I like you as more than a friend".
Except you totally can and that's what we're trying to tell you.
Why not? That's pretty autistic but it sounds like he is too so it should be familiar territory for him.
You cant be open like that, but you expect him to be so?
You think I hurt the girl's feelings the way I did things? When I went in the classroom she wasn't there and then she came in and looked like she was pretty sad. I felt bad about it but I couldn't date her, I didn't feel the same way. I just acted like nothing happened and it was cool between us. I've been rejected harshly, I got pretty disapproving looks from women when they rejected me, it felt like they were rejecting a smelly trash can. I always tried to be pretty soft on rejection because I know it hurts.
Why don't you kiss him instead?
This is literally what you tell him you mong. Stop making shit awkward and/or confusing. Let him now and take it from there.
Why? Maybe you don't really like him?
lol is this bait ?
This is Literally the female brain. And you wonder why your gender is fucked? God, he probabky knows how shit you are and won't move forward.
Man up and tell him pussy.
If I told him how I felt and he turned me down imagine how I'd feel, it was hard enough on me him not kissing me when he had the chance.
>"hey chad, this was a great time today" >"I want to do something for you right now" >unzip his fly >"right. now." >drop to knees
Can't be more clear than that, OP
So? You just going to play it safe and never try to move forward? Apply your same logic to him. Again, man up and don't be a pussy.
Mandatory pic related, because I've been "dropped hints on" all my life only to realize many many years later what was happening. Being shy is no explanation for missed opportunities.
fucking thots. You need to fuck off from him, hes better than you will ever deserve
well enjoy your missed opportunity then.
Then don't cry about it, because you're the reason why it's not happening.
Goodbye, I hate women.
Oh so you don't want to put any work into communicating and just expect him to mind read and carry the burden of communicating for the both of you for the whole relationship. My mistake i thought I read that you liked him somewhere. Anyways, why did you need advice on? I don't see your problem
This is bait.
I'm assuming you're young if this isn't bait. You have to let him know somehow even if you don't tell him you like him per say. Ask him if he would be open to have a girlfriend. Depending on his response if he's cool about it he will reject you without hurting your feelings otherwise he's an ass if he's blunt about the whole thing.
I don't understand these responses, it isn't normal for girls to make the first move and is kind of weird.
I still refuse to believe any girl has dropped hints for me. Surely I'd have picked up on something at least once, right?
>tfw predenting to be calm and confident, joking around girls all the time, good body language >can see girls hints clearly, never act on them because total sperg on the inside, instantly doubting myself that they arent really into me, fearing the rejection and feeling the hassle of going out and dating >kissed girl one, dryhumped other girl once (we were drunk), 26 still a virgin >wish i socialised more during my teen years, but was to busy being edgy bitch and playing videogames someday
OP, read most of the responses from the guys here and don't come out and tell him anything. You have been more than obvious so he KNOWS.
Only one of the following is true and in no particular order they are; 1. He doesn't like you for more than a friend. 2. He's scared of you. (this is more likely)
Now, you can do what these foolish guys suggest and spill your heart but he still won't do anything since there is no incentive to do so. He needs some incentive to get off his ass and you need to stop doing all the work here.
So, you MUST find the best looking guy you can and start going out with that guy and you have to let guy friend know. Don't rub it in his face or talk about the other guy constantly but go on dates with the other guy and stop going with guy friend.
If guy friend wants you the frightened little mouse will make his move. He might get pissy with you or try and disparage good looking guy or look like a battered puppy and when he does you ask him why is he acting like this. Don't let him wiggle out of it and make him tell you. He will, I guarantee.
This has worked for me 100% of the time with every type of guy. Now, it is possible he doesn't really like you but he will still get pissy but you have to make him tell you he doesn't care. A negative answer is still an answer
she has been making moves, a lot of them and the friend is like a limp dick. If I were her, I'd give up on the guy and go find me someone that had some life in them.
The friend is like a starfish and OP is doing all the work and he just lays there unblinking.
No the dumbass friend is missing the opportunity because he is chicken shit
If this is the kind of guy who doesn't get her hints, he's certainly going to take her dating someone else as losing his chance. I've been baited though.
Of course a guy will think this is a bad idea but I offer OP what does work when dealing with a guy that won't respond. It works for me every time and all my friends that do it as well. I'm just surprised OP never learned this tactic. OP has tried everything so she needs to shock him and if this doesn't get him moving nothing will.
You guys must know we do lose patience, I mean most of us won't keep hanging in there wishing and hoping for years like guys do. If a guy won't get off his ass he will lose.
If you insist that he should make a move, you could be more obvious with your signals. Bring up something sexual you have been fantasizing about. Bring up how you hate that nobody ever asks you out. Bring up a trivial problem you have and have him solve it for you. Touch him when you speak to him. Sit really close to him when you are alone. Lean your head on his shoulder or complain that he is too tall for you to do that. Tell him about things you are going to do so he can either invite himself he can take you. Grab his hand and lead him somewhere. Hold his hand in general. Hug him for 6 seconds when you meet him. Cup a feel and give him a compliment. Smile whenever his eyes lock with yours. When you are walking away from him, do that thing where your ass bounces once like you almost do a jump with the back of your body.
Doing one of these should be enough to make him make a move, do 3 and the slowest guy should make a move, do all of them and he has fallen so hard for you, you can't make him stop thinking about you.
I'm convinced this is b8 after reading this thread.
If you're really a woman post your hand with a timestamp.
You must be 14 or something then. Most guys get the hint that they've lost when she starts to date someone else. It's over then, and not worth trying, unless you want to be branded creepy as fuck.
>Bring up something sexual you have been fantasizing about You guys are so ham handed, urgh
>Most guys get the hint that they've lost when she starts to date someone else No they don't. Guys go for girls in relationships all the time and stay at it.
Are you guys intentionally missing the point?
OP has tried and tried and tried and the friend won't move and all you can offer is to jump him with sex or get on her knees and beg. I said she shouldn't be blatant and rub the other guy in the friends face but he has to know if he doesn't want her then other guys do. If he knows she'll always be there he'll just blankly stare as she tries.
Here's a tip user. We think differently than you do. I read about you guys asking for tips with your "game" all the time, well we play too. OP has made it way too easy on her friend and goes more than half way yet you fools tell her to do all the work. If he's stupid or in a stupor he needs a good smack.
>do this simple thing to give your statement credibility >*does not do the thing*
>Guys go for girls in relationships all the time and stay at it. Those guys are in the minority. Most guys, and certainly most guys who can't take obvious hints, will consider "I have a boyfriend." a polite rejection. Stop trying to give people horrible ideas.
She hasn't "tried" at all. She laid down some poorly put together hints and the guy's been taught his whole life that you can't date someone who sees you as a friend.
Hell, this is all even assuming that with her complete lack of responsibility for anything in dating someone, that she'd even be able to attract another guy.
>"I have a boyfriend." a polite rejection Try being me for a week. It doesn't go down like this.
Its not an idea its something that works, always works and I'm surprised OP has never done this or had it suggested to her by her mom or aunts or her friends.
Just like guys have "get her drunk" to have sex we have "make him jealous".
>guy's been taught his whole life that you can't date someone who sees you as a friend a blatant lie. all you guys talk daily about getting close to a girl as a friend to win her over, even when she has a bf.
>Just like guys have "get her drunk" to have sex we have "make him jealous". This is bait.
Guys don't take hints at all. When I lost my virginity a girl asked me to take a nap with her and that's all I expected to happen.
Well good luck never finding a boyfriend that YOU want, because you will never actually go for something you want, instead you'll wait for that golden gose to be given to you.
No. I never noticed shit until literally read a book on it and body language and even now I only sometimes notice it. If literally anything else is occupying my mind, I will miss the most obvious of hints and won't recognize it until hours or days later b which point it's usually way too late.
No you're a true retard. If someone told me they have a boyfriend, not only would I no longer consider that girl an option, I might never consider her an option again as the opportunity has long since passed at that point.
And guys only get girls drunk because of retards like you. Just like those dumb bitches on Tinder say in big bold words "NOT HERE TO HOOKUP", women are always looking for an excuse to explain why they aren't sluts. Some guys may be getting girls drunk for nefarious reasons but others understand she wants plausible deniability despite the fact she wants to gobble dick like a starving kid in Africa wants to eat food.
Same. I was invited to hot tub once and I sat across from her in the hot tub until she made an obvious move. I wasn't even a virgin then either. It just didn't occur to me.
This thread makes my head hurt. Guys are bad at getting """hints""" such as staring at somebody in silents at the end of a walk. I would never fucking think you wanted a kiss. You won't make a move because it's "not normal" and "weird". Well, if you care about being normal and not weird more than about the guy, you don't deserve him. And won't get him. Have fun, keep in mind that unless you make a move or get super fucking drunk with him you'll never get him.
If a girl came up to me and was like "Hey, I like you as more a friend. Can we date?" and I was into her, I'd say yes. If not, I'd politely decline.
But then you'd have an answer, either way.
>normal Jow Forums? what? also there is a Gender spectrum now
lets LARP some bait: I am curious to the hints. ever eat a banana or ice-cream with a lot of tongue work, while maintaining eye contact with him? how is your eye contact when dropping "hints"?
Sounds like he's the smart one to me. Who wants a relationship with someone as dumb as OP?
That's very apparent. Ask him to a nice-ish restaurant and get all touchy feely with him.
Yeah god forbid a woman be made to make an effort and do ONCE what every man who's ever interacted with a girl they wanted has been forced to do. Jesus christ
I'm 25 years old. I've been with 9 women and date a lot, especially lately. If a girl I'm interested in starts talking to another guy, I'm 100% gone. Granted, I got over my teenage "freeze up anytime a girl expresses interest" phase a long time ago.
I once would have fallen for that, but I'm not desperate enough for it now. I don't need any one woman, especially one willing to play stupid ass games like that. I wouldn't ghost, but I'd stop hitting her up entirely and stop hanging out with her. I'd move on.
does he already have a girlfriend?
they do they are just too scared to act on them for fear of rejection.
when guys have been battered by a lifetime of rejection, they stop trying. he's not going to make a move because past experiences have let him down.
Speak for yourself, I've never picked up on anything, so unless I've literally never had a girl interested in me (which I'll admit is a possibility) I just didn't notice.
>unless I've literally never had a girl interested in me (which I'll admit is a possibility) This is likely the case. girls are very selective with who they throw hints to. only average to attractive guys.
I never got less than a 6/10 on /soc/, if that counts for anything.
soc is all gay dudes though. gays dont rate the same as real women
Well ahead of you user.
Get a mutual friend to put out some feelers to see what his vibe on you is
red and basepilled
Be about as sublte as a nuke. If that doesnt work, either hes really that dense, or isnt into you that way