I'm a slav living in slavland with around 20k USD in savings...

I'm a slav living in slavland with around 20k USD in savings. How do I go about legally migrating into an English-speaking country (I don't know any other foreign languages except English) and becoming a decent member of society? How much more money do I need to pull it off, if it's even possible nowadays?

I've looked at enrolling as an international student in some colleges in US, England, New Zealand, Austarlia and Canada, and all of them have exorbitant tuition fees and living costs. Is it really as hopeless as it seems unless the person looking to migrate is a billionaire?

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su.dk/english/state-educational-grant-and-loan-scheme-su/
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Sounds like you're doing really well. Why would you want to move?

Do you have a girlfriend? Have her give birth on US soil and you'll be entitled to the USA forever.

Go as a tourist for a while. Get crumby jobs doing day labor (black market, but super easy and you start working right away). Very quicly, if you have good ehtic, one of the men will hire you full-time for (black market) pay if he likes you. It's very easy.

Do that a few months, for steady pay, and support your gf until she gives birth. The moment she does, go to social security and the benefits office. Claim all the money you can, meanwhile look for a legal job based on your skills.

Remember to move to a sanctuary city and you'll have a 0% chance of deportation. Also you can claim benefits in California if you're illegal status (aka before your kid is born). anyway good luck and fuck borders!

>fuck borders

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To improve the quality of life and to be able to interact with actual humans. Yes, I'm doing relatively well, but this sum is the result of a few years of fairly harsh saving, not something I've magically conjured in a few months. It took a lot.
Thanks for the suggestion, but no, I don't have a GF, and this way seems a bit fishy to say the least. I would like to be as less of a burden on the country that accepts me as possible.

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For USA try marriage or maybe the green card lottery (if you're in the 0.05% winners lmao). If you win the green card lottery you still need to have a citizen sponsor you or prove you can support yourself i.e you're already working on a non permanent visa.

Marriage would work for others too I guess.
Australia/Canada/New Zealeand have a points system for immgiration. If you have a degree that's on some list the respective governments update every year, decent English skills, 5 years work experience relevant to your degree you can easily get a work visa. Finding a job might be hard tho.

This pretty much confirms my fears that, aside from marriage or a job invitation, there's no way to get into a civilised country with just 20k. Thanks anyway.

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If you're working, then you're not a burden.

You only get one life to live. If you're not able to get in by traditional means, then do whatever it takes.

You can also join the US military if you're not a citizen and looking for papers. This is not advertised, however, you can talk to a recruiter(s) and one of them will help you out. Have your birth certificate and passport. I know people who took this route.

The US military kind of sucks, but it's a job with a paycheck. You'll get free rent, insurance, and food. All needs taken care of and you'll make plenty of friends and have ample opportunity to practice your english.

I believe the UK has a labour shortage list you can review.

Another option is to fly to Sweden and claim asylum (any loose reason will get you approved). They'll pay your housing and needs while you wait for the court. If approved, move to UK anytime before brexit finalizes.

You have options. Just if the traditional stuff doesn't work, you need to be a man and use your ingenuity. It's your gift from god.

Don't come here, not out of me being "fuck off we're full" but this place is a nightmare, stay away for the better of you friend

What's so bad about eastern Europe?
I've heard in passing that there's problems over there, but I've never heard of anything that seemed much worse or different from what's going on in the US.

I would say go for Australia, they need workers currently and it's much easier to get a visa there than it is in America. If you are under 30 it will be easier, over 30 still possible, but Australia will be your best bet.

Ahh, Western ignorance

For the same amount of labour you put in, in EE you can afford much less than in the West

The Nordic countries

We all speak English

If you learn our language you might even be allowed to stay and work after your studies.
If you are not a criminal, you will be more contributing than most Arabs

>If you learn the language you might be allowed to stay
What the fuck are you talking about nobody here kicks people out for not knowing Danish and in fact the officials hate it when immigrants who study don't stay here

But ye, OP, come to Denmark - Sweden is dead and Norway is full of fags, Finland is Norse Russia tho

Stay in your shithole please

>this place is a nightmare
I assume you haven't lived with slavs in Eastern Europe. It's like a whole other (awful) world, really. I'd take Western people over Eastern slavs any day.
I have researched ways of getting into Australia for a bit, didn't see any special conditions for poeple under/over 30. It is job-related, right?
Thanks, I'll look into studying in Nordic countries (specifically Finland and Denmark) next. The thing that scares me the most is the language barrier. Even if I study fully in English, I'm worried that I might not manage to get enough of a proficiency in the local language to get a job or something later on.
Your hospitality is much appreciated.

Australia is basically off-limits if you only want to come and work, depending on education and work experience. There are, however some programs that allow you to move to a remote location in the nation and work there... I even used to live there as a kid, and i'm still refused entry, not for being a criminal, but for not having the skills they seek.
study visa means study ONLY, no work, means you have to be well-off from the get-go.

If said slavland is a EU member (ie. isn't Russia), you'll cut down drastically on the paperwork (free movement of citizens), and you may be able to seek study welfare (SU) in Denmark. That basically means free college and pay for attending and keeping track of your studies. 20k USD should get you a plane ticket and a deposit for a place to live.

Provided everything regarding your study is in place, you might be able to get "youth housing", which are small, cheap apartments for students, or a dorm.

Do be careful when seeking work, that you don't clock in to many hours on a week (afaik the limit is 10 or 15 hours/week), or you can risk getting your ass deported.

Keep in mind that a lot of our interaction with the government is done through and managed automatically with computers... things can go wrong.

Protip: If you want to stay permanently, we have a lot of positions that need filling, eg. we have a huge shortage of doctors and healthcare personnel if that's something for you. Also police officers and truck drivers.

Still, come to Denmark, we need you :-)

Language isn't a huge deal... Everybody speaks English, and Danish (as well as Swedish or Norwegian) is similar enough to English that you already have some solid footing. A good deal of workplaces, especially in the private sector aren't that bitchy about you knowing the local language.
Having been an expatriate myself, another tip; if you take steps to make the language nescessary outside of school, it'll come quicker to you.

You should stop focusing on the difficulty and pick a nation first, then decide how you'll immigrate there.

>20k USD should get you a plane ticket and a deposit for a place to live.

I accidentally shaved off some of this. (damn character limit)

20k USD should get you a plane ticket, and a deposit for a place to live, as well as rent and food for a few months.

Also: info on student loans and grants in Denmark (provided your nation is in EU/EEA or you enroll in an exchange program): su.dk/english/state-educational-grant-and-loan-scheme-su/
Info on working and rules concerning work in most EU countries can be found through EURES (google them)

Both yes and no... OP would be lost in many countries, like Germany (where the number of English speakers is relatively low) or France (where many outright refuse to speak English)

It's important to do research first.

Magnificent, quite a lot of useful information. Unfortunately, my country isn't a part of EU, so it's kind of a hard mode for me.
Call me stupid, but I'm not really picky as long as people speak English. I just want to have a chance at getting away from this place, building a new life for myself and never looking back.

You are as horrible as self-hating whites in America.

I think I've found something suitable: toiohomai.ac.nz/study/new-zealand-diploma-software-development-level-6
2 years, about 32k NZD for a full qualification. Gonna send a letter with some stupid questions to dispel my most obvious fears.
Maybe, it depends on the point of view. If, say, there is an intelligent person in Zimbabwe that is able to see the flaws of their own people and country and wants to leave, would you call him self-hating? Zimbabwe to Eastern Europe is what Easter Europe is to developed Western countries.

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The US is pretty nice. If you play the military right, free degree and skills going out. Also speaking Russian could net you some comfy positions too.