>nice girl
>kind-hearted, hardworking
>knows how to cook
>we both feels like we have a lot of chemistry between in each other
>actually really likes me
>only flaw is she is fat and pretty short
I am an above average guy, maybe 7/10, work out quite frequently and decently tall. Honestly, should I get into a relationship with her? My friends and family will be shocked as to why I date a fat girl. I really think she has an amazing personality.
>should I get into a relationship with her?
No. She deserves better than you.
Look, being fat is unhealthy and unattractive to many people. Don't just shit on me about how I am bad because I follow the social norm that fat people are generally not desired.
If it's such a big deal, then why are you even considering this? She is clearly a bad catch, right? So let her go.
I am considering because I don't think she is a bad catch. It just doesn't sit right with me how she don't want to put any effort into losing weight, because I have an active lifestyle. Putting aside her physical appearance, I feel an emotional connection with her as a person.
Then it's not as clear cut as you want it to be. If being fat is such a problem, the desicion is made. But apparently it isn't such a problem.
Also, your first message is all about how others will see you with a fat partner. Don't you think that's not the best way to look into this?
Convince to start working out together? Going for runs? Would probably come across as rude though.
Do enlighten me on what is the best way to look at it, please. I feel very conflicted between myself and my friends and family, on what is acceptable and not.
I bought it up once and she strongly refuse to run because she really hate how tiring it is. Also, I think diet is way more important than exercise in weight loss.
>on what is acceptable and not.
What bothers you about her being fat? Her health? How it makes you look to others? What's the problem?
I am considering long-term relationships, and I think being fat would make it harder to conceive children and increases chance of getting heart-related problems, which of course I wouldn't want. I want us to both be healthy. My mum actually dislikes the idea of me having a fat girlfriend, and a lot of my friends are really judgey about having a fat girlfriend and I don't want to hear their hurtful remarks if I do end up starting a relationship with her.
>I think being fat would make it harder to conceive children and increases chance of getting heart-related problems, which of course I wouldn't want.
Hope you don't date people that eat like crap, smoke, drink too much, etc, because modern hearts are put under a lot of strain nowadays.
>My mum actually dislikes the idea of me having a fat girlfriend, and a lot of my friends are really judgey about having a fat girlfriend and I don't want to hear their hurtful remarks if I do end up starting a relationship with her.
Do you think they would be right in what they say?
>knows how to cook
Are you sure you don't want to get fat later in life? Sounds like a pleasant way to do it.
ITT our OP is young and vain and doesn't yet realize that his body will one day look like shit too inevitably if you don't end up disfigured before that because of an accident or something. If you got all mangled up and busted looking do you think goody 2 chins would care what you look like? If the connection is strong and mutual get over her being fat. There's a lot of people out there but not many cool ones. Mostly npcs it seems
> she strongly refuse to run because she really hate how tiring it is
This is a red flag to me, I think this attitude could potentially leak into other aspects of life. Also exercise is more important than diet. Diet is just what lazy people do because they can't put in the effort to exercise. You can eat fast food all day and work it off, but if you sit on your ass all day you'll become a fatass even with healthy eating habits.
Right or not in what they say, it hurts to always have people shit on why my girlfriend is fat. I can't take these kind of questions to my face.
You have a good point honestly.
I don't how much of a red flag this is, but in work and everything else she is really hardworking. Also, I may be able to convince her to exercise in the future, I just need to know how do I even bring up the question of weight because it is such a sensitive issue. Right now, I am curious as to is she overweight or obese.
If she is fat enough that you're calling her a fat girl and are worried about people judging you, it's probably obesity.
If you're fine with her go for it and maybe you can develop healthy lifestyle choices down the line. But if it's bothering you so much you might want to reevaluate if you really like her or if your just trying to find good points in her because you don't interact with a lot of girls of something.
Alright user.
Buy her a gym membership.
She will make it brah.
We will all make it.
agree'd
the kinda petty shit people get hung up on is unbelievable. I think most mothers these days should thank god they're son brought home a fat chick and not a tranny...
Traps are not gay.
Lol here we go. Thread derailed.
Well, if it helps the context, I am from an Asian country. Most young people in my country aren't overweight, hence the Asian parent's expectiations.
actually that really does contextualize thing cause i have the american perspective on stuff. It's unfair how much pressure asian families put on their kids and I could understand the judgement thing more. It's something about their culture I'll just never understand or honestly even appreciate.
Life is full of shitty people though. So if you found someone who actually cares about you give it some thought if you want to give her up. The world being what it is you might not get something like that again. plus fat asian chicks are honestly hot cause they're usually more *pleasantly plump* than piggy.
Thanks user, I think I will try it out with her and see how it goes.
Don't ever start a relationship under the assumption that you can ever convince someone to change their ways, she's fat for a reason, and she sure as hell isn't going to just say "ok let's work out honey", just trying to convince her will already come off as an insult to her (ie "you're ugly, unattractive, it's embarrassing to be seen with you" ), even if she agrees and gets fit, which technically is something great for her, she will now forever feel insecure "what if he leaves me if i ever get fat, i have to take care of my diet and keep working out"
That sort of negative motivation gradually corrodes a woman's heart and sooner or later it will turn into resentment towards you "I'm always on edge and feel pressured to be fit because of him, he doesn't really love me, why do i have to try so hard for such a person?"
It doesn't make any sense but that's just how the female heart works, if a woman doesn't change for herself then never try to make her change for your sake
It is far easier to change the apearance of a woman than her soul.
Relationships can be seen as investments, you get out what you put in, but only if at its core it is worth investing in. If she does really want to be with you, it won't take too much encouraging for her to change her habits to better suit you. You should learn how to send off the right signals though, how to speak without speaking, or to speak while talking.