Just found out that the grill I'm dating is Bipolar, on top of that she has BPD. How fucked am I? I want to dump her...

Just found out that the grill I'm dating is Bipolar, on top of that she has BPD. How fucked am I? I want to dump her, because of that, but I'm afraid of some crazy stuff or her suiciding herself. Wat do?

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>Just found out that the grill I'm dating is Bipolar, on top of that she has BPD
Self-diagnosed or clinically prescribed?

Clinically, she even was institutionalised for her manic episode for over two months last summer. With being so aggressive, that they had to tie her to a bed for 48 hours
The thing is, she opened up to me and I feel like a dick for wanting to end it, still, it's better to end it now, than wait a month and fuck everything up even more

Well, regardless of the answer you should stay away.
I don't see how this could end well.

>I don't see how this could end well.
Well fuck. I am expecting that, but how do I minimize the damage, preferably to both parties?

Breaking it off and ghosting. Cutting her out of your life

I wanted to do that, but I'm kinda worried that she'll hurt herself, or that I provoke depression or a manic episode. She's a nice grill, wouldn't want that

Is she on medication? Is she doing well now?

Yes and yes. She also keeps a straight routine, so she gets enough sleep and food, since last time lack of sleep triggered her mania

Well stick it out untill shit goes south for reals, give it a chance

If she is making a good effort then don't dump her, being a bf and encouraging this routine will allow both of you to be happy and she won't have mania as long as she keeps at it.

What else is she doing to help herself? Therapy? How long has she kept this up for? List what she is doing and i'll tell you if it is worth it or not to have her long term.

I don't want to enroll in something so taxing, since if I fail, I'll only hurt her more. Plus I will ever know, who tells me that she lovers me, she or bipolar disorder.
And yeah, she goes to therapy, started exercising regularly and really stays strong, from what I gathered

Bail out, not because she is mentally ill, but because she is a virtue signalling cunt who thinks her self-diagnosed delusions count as a substitute for a personality.

Nah, I wouldn't even touch a cunt like that. She's legit bipolar and BPD. On meds and seeing a therapist

>I want to dump her, because of tha
No you don't. You knew who she was when you started dating her. Just because the thing you knew didn't have a name at the time doesn't mean you didn't know.

Way to tell us that you understand nothing about bipolarity

Everyone saying stay away is retarded
We need context
My girl friend has borderline (diagnosed), has struggled with depression and has anger issues. But she knows exactly what the problem is, she understands it's a problem, takes medication, works on herself, Goes to a therapy and overally is trying to win over her issues. We had countless fights in the past but it's getting better and better with time and if I wasn't there for her, she would probably try to do an Hero already during that time.
IT all depends on her and what she does to fight it

>We need context
>" she even was institutionalised for her manic episode for over two months last summer. With being so aggressive, that they had to tie her to a bed for 48 hours"
is plenty enough context for me

Well, my girl is the same, but I can't commit to someone like that. Too much emotional labor, plus as I said before, I'll never know who is in love with me; she or her disorder.
Also, props on helping your girl.

>they had to tie her to a bed for 48 hours
Hot

That was in the past and while it is important, it's not what I meant
I meant what does she do herself now to get better
When bipolar or BPD takes over, you are not yourself. You could Say literally. It's a whole different personality, usuallly filled to brim with negative emotions
The agression she displayed back then is exactly what she has to fight with. That's why it's important to know why she has it (is it just random or connected to some emotional trauma) and what she does herself to fight it

If you are not strong enough, then you Will sooner or later give up
You won't be Able to do it
There was a short period of Time where she would attack me while she had an attack
I was a husk of myself and we both saw it and we both tried to fight it. We managed to do it and ever since then she's the happiest she's been her whole life
GOOD medication and support from a perskn you love is usually enough to overcome it, but the support you have to show her is very tricky and you have to be careful. It's hard and not everyone can do it, there's nothing shameful about not being Able to, so it's better to give UP on her if you don't think you are Able to keep UP with it. Or rather give her up

You can feel bad but that's not your problem. You can't help black holes and people with BPD are black holes, especially in relationships.

As I said multiple times, I already made up my mind. I just want to know the best way to dump her, so not to hurt her too much

duse ghosting will minimise the damage. shes still gonna go mental if you tell her only youll get dragged into it more. ghosting her trust me will minimise it.

does she know where you live?

no bailing out at her best will cause less damage than if he bails out when shes gone mental

Just be honest and kind and tell her you’re sorry but you can’t do it. Make sure her family or friends can be there to support her.thats all you can do.
I have diagnosed bipolar and bpd too. (Luckily i can control it very well, but its like fighting someone inside me. Have never been violent, just spouting crazy stuff).
Anyway Bpd isn’t automatically a black hole of nothing. It’s like a 5 year old inside me yelling for me to do toxic shit. I fight it every day, tell it to fuck off, and i’m winning, slowly. But most people with bipolar and bpd are bad news.

My ex has PTSD from being raped (she's a roastie who doesn't know how to tell guys no) and Bipolar and bipolar depression and schizophrenia. It wasn't hell since being a dad bf was easy but it put so much unnecessary strain on our relationship.

My bf also had depression and anxiety, but it started to fade down after we started seeing and he stopped taking the medicines too. So just be around her motivate her, love and care for her.
Anyways it gives signs to him when we have a discussion about me leaving him and going abroad.

I've worked at a mental hospital for bipolar for 3 years. And we also had the odd schizo and BPD. I've put hundreds of patients in belt beds. Personally, stay the fuck away from crazy. She will be a succubus in a maniac high and will probably give you sex that is out of this world. But I would not wish my worst enemy to have a girlfriend who is bipolar depressed And the fucking BPD. I'd worry about a smash and dash too because they can get real clingy and even stalk you after you break up.

It's going to be a shitshow. Amazing sex when she is maniac. But absolute hell when she is depressed. I don't have enough experience with BPD but the few I've had to dealt with professionally were such huge fucking headaches to work with.

I was going to say, contact police and tell them you are breaking up with a girl who you worry will threathen suicide. Just be outright and say it. If she knows where you live or which car you drive don't be surprised if you arrive to slashed tires or broken windows. Good luck.

Thanks for all the advises. I guess ghosting her is the best solution. Luckily she doesn't know where I live, so that won't be a problem. Still, I'm kinda worried about her well-being.
As for everyone telling me that I just need to be there for her and shit. I juts can't risk taking on something that grand. Since if I fail, the results can be catastrophic. I don't want to have an hero on my hands. I know my own limitations and I know that there's a big chance of me failing.

Sounds like she's trying to be good, but you'd rather hold her past against her than give it a try.

She is and I am. The thing is, I don't want to take that kind of responsibility on. Besides, if things do work out and we really make it work, I don't want to have children with someone who can literally go crazy from all the post birth trauma. I'm 30 and I want a lasting relationship, with marriage and kids, not a fling with a hot, but crazy chick

Wouldn't be a fling if you stood by her

Ghost her OP, but tell her beforehand. Just write her a letter, explaining that you can't be with her and make some shit up. DO NOT tell her that it's because of her diagnosis. And goodluck
You retarded or a woman, user? OP just told you why he doesn't want to fuck a crazy broad, yet you disregard all what he wrote and write some semi unrelated shit. Work on your reading comprehension or tell your wrangler that you are on the 4 chan again

>she'll hurt herself, or that I provoke depression or a manic episode.
Not your fault.
>shes a nice grill
If she has bipolar and BPD, she's not.

You okay, buddy? You seem kinda angry.
BPD or bipolar doesn't mean she's a bad person. It's like saying that you are a dick, cause you have skin cancer

Shit I thought I said it
Whatever
Aś that user said, just be honest
She Will probably understand, she Will be hurt obviously, but you can't do it without hurting her. Just tell her you aren't strong enough and won't be Able to handle the emotional burden and responsibility and that she needs someone stronger than you, because if it's not now, then you Will break at some point in time and that Will be even worse

I have bipolar and I wouldn't date myself. Having BPD on top of that is a lot of Patience and commitment on your end but honestly you should stay away. She could cheat on you because of a manic episode or even think she has no idea who you are. I don't think that's what you want to deal with but if it is then good luck user.

only consider staying if she is medicated and in therapy and intends to keep it that way.

>BPD or bipolar doesn't mean she's a bad person.

really wish people would realize this. people confuse bpd with sociopathy and think it means the person has no feelings or empathy. the opposite is true, people with bpd have too many emotions, they feel too much and too intensely and have trouble regulating their feelings. they can be very kind and caring.

Please run, she can try to kill you and claim insanity.

Dump and ghost her NOW

Yup, that's exactly why I'm hesitant and don't know how to dump her. She's an amazing person and I really don't want to hurt her.
I want to see her try, I'm 6'9 and she's 4'5

>I want to see her try, I'm 6'9 and she's 4'5
Was for