Would you fight them with a shitty ass?
What if someone broke into your house while you were taking a dump?
Gavin Adams
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Owen Peterson
rock looks like a dick
Matthew Cox
Hell yeah. Imagine being confronted by a naked man holding a shotgun, with shit running down his leg.
Benjamin Harris
I'd fish my log out of the bowl (provided it isn't one of those spoopy swimming logs which seem to flush themselves away without a sound) and charge at them with it like that Japanese guy charged at that communist with a katana.
Connor Thompson
my dumps take seconds
come at me
Eli Hughes
I better see this happen in the future
Ian Morgan
>this post is off topic
Isaac Richardson
Id fight them with my shit
Camden Lee
>be me
>be performing midnight ablution
>had Indian for dinner and excretion was rather violent
>be there for what seems like 10min until i hear my bathroom window smashed next door
>I shot
>decide to keep silent to catch intruder off guard
>neighborhood negro climbs into bathroom
>"mane dis shit stably up in here"
>holding my breath but nerves lets one rip
>neighborhood negro busts open toilet door
>"ayo dis nigga got caught lackin takin a dookie"
>starts laughing at me and snapchats a video of me
>"yo ads nasty white boi"
>try and play it off to catch him off guard
>feeling better so I try and rush him in one fell swoop
>boxers around my ankles restrict movement
>intruder pushes me back down to toilet seat and toes me up before looting my house
Brayden Martinez
I'm taking a dump right now.
Kevin Howard
this thread is shitty
Aaron Russell
I'd hold it in, and approach him, then shit right inmy hand and eat that fucker so he thinks I'm crazy.
James Jackson
can't think of a more dominant assertion of my territory
Jason Parker
or id shove one of those hog catcher nets way up my butthole then shoot the net at him from my shit cannon.
Lincoln Hill
i worry about this every time i poop
someone on Jow Forums used to keep a glock in a plastic bag inside his toilets water tank
Owen Bell
I take off my pants to poop so I'd come at them with a shitty ass and my dick hanging out.
Lucas King
POST THE ACTUAL GIF FAGGOT
John Cox
I keep 2 knives in the bathroom and a .22lr in the medicine cabinet
James Wood
I’d die where I shit
Eli Torres
I'd coat my hands in it to gain an advantage.
Logan Garcia
I was born ready for just this scenario.
Joseph Garcia
This killed me cunt. Thanks for the hearty kek
James Scott
>runny shits
Do Americans really do this?
Ayden Sullivan
Same, spooky shit
Mason Martinez
I eat alot of mango, which does give you runny shits.
Nicholas Turner
Excellent question.
I wear a shoulder harness for just such a contingency. If I was at home. I would step out of my pants going full nude for the lower half. The shock value might save my life.
When taking a shower, I'm a little more exposed but I do keep the gun at hand near the back of shower with the door just slightly open for rapid access. I would grab the gun and spare mag. Then hide the harness behind the toilet. I would continue to run the shower, ready for the unlucky intruder to think he's getting the drop on me.
Juan Turner
something like pic related
Justin Stewart
Leo Bailey
>88 hours in photoshop
Grayson Campbell
I take a handgun with me everywhere in the house. So hell yeah I'd fight with shit between my cheeks. I'd fight right from the goddamn throne if they came up to the door.
John Flores
/b/ tier /thread
Gabriel Bell
It's funny because OP poses a question I consider every time I'm taking a dump, with my infant daughter in the room over asleep.
Fucking glownigger spooks are toying with me.
I'll run out bare fucking naked, a log halfway out my asshole and choke a motherfucker to death like I'm some rabid patient zero zombie on steroids. Nothing short of a chain gun or a helicopter blade is going to stop me from crushing the life out of a home invader.
Be warned, glowfags.
James Ross
There are literally dozens of us who poop completely naked!
Camden Phillips
only when visiting walmart
Matthew Sullivan
>pooping late at night completely naked
Absolute patrician
Tyler Thomas
You're cool!
Adam Torres
great thread
Jacob Richardson
>afterwards putting on a fresh pair of briefs and slipping into your made bed
Hudson Thomas
>this level of comfy
feelsgoodmang
Noah Parker
>Not harkening back to your money instincts and hurling your poop at the invader
Eli Sanders
fuck off discord trap nigger
Austin Lee
>they kick in the door
>you shoot them with your toilet gun
>as they lay there, life bleeding out rapidly, you use their shirt as tp, and stare deeply into their indignant eyes as the life fades out