Besides sex, why are you with the person that you're with? What does it mean to need someone?
I fear I have isolated myself to such an extent that I am able to justify the thought of "I don't need anyone ". So I don't pursue any potential interests.
I'm not an autist, I do just fine In social situations and i have turned down female coworkers and friends, it's just the fake it till you make it mentality. Sometimes i over compensate, I'm an imposter and a big fear of mine is that I will disappoint and bore them when they discover .
I'm talking with a girl now, for some reason she likes me. Now I feel obligated and its causing me to lose interest. I don't need her. I don't need anyone. But I want her and I'm stuck in this headspace that I know I'm gonna ghost her.
My boyfriend is my best friend, more than that. We are pretty much the same person. We support each other in every way, he encourages me to be less anxious and get out of my comfort zone and I love to look after him when he’s stressed and tired from work. Idk why but it feels so good to make his dinner every night and make sure his clothes are clean and folded so he can be the best he can be. We teach each other things, and it’s all in all a very nurturing relationship. Of course we never “needed” this kind of relationship, we both did just fine on our own. But I feel like we are our best selves together
Ryan Perez
I'd feel guilty if my girlfriend made dinner every night and I'd feel offended if she did my laundry all the time, lol.
There's a quote that I really resonated with:
"Destined to observe, never to experience"
And I know it's all my fault, like pink Floyd's the wall.
Bentley Brown
I just can't imagine life alone anymore. It feels lonely and boring without my gf to nag me.
Charles Powell
im with my girlfriend because she's smart and funny and not a retarded thot like every girl in the place i live and we are like the same person and think alike and i dont mind being around her and shes overall just so great in my eyes and and hearing her talk makes me at ease no matter the subject and i cant get tired of her and i feel like it would be smart to keep her forever since i dont mind the happiness she brings me. sorry if that was ultra gay. i dont usually talk about how i feel.
Jack Sullivan
It's boring and dull without them. Sure, times can be fun when they're not with you, but it just feels empty. You can be in the same room doing completely different things and still feel their companionship. It's a beautiful feeling of finding someone that understands you but respects you.
Owen Hall
because they are the one thing you prefer over being alone. might happen for you eventually too
Camden Sanchez
I want a relationship like this too :(
Samuel Rodriguez
This terrifies me. I always feel the need to entertain or do something when they are around, otherwise I'm sure they would lose interest. It leads to resentment and obligation, the only time my mind rests is when they are gone. Its exhausting.
Camden Carter
You and me both, pal. I feel like maybe I woke up earlier and posted this in a half dream state.
I don't get it, and I have this promising date coming up. I keep sitting here trying to psyche myself into it, like "yeah man you really need this, you need a gf" and then my mind keeps pulling me back to the "user, don't you remember how fucking AWFUL it is to be on someone's schedule, or have to make time for them, or take care of them?"
I've had relationships in the past, but these days they feel like someone explaining to me the taste of a fruit they had a long time ago.
Jack Williams
I dont need a partner. No one really does, and if you do, you are together for the wrong reasons.
You have a partner because it adds something, not because it completes you. You should never be dependant on someone. You are an individual first and foremost.
I'm asexual, and I have a boyfriend. I don't need him, nor do I care about sex, at all. But he adds so much to my life, makes me smile even at the thought of him, and is someone I can fully trust. He makes my daily life fun, improves my mood, and gives me something to look forward to every day. My life would not be anywhere near as good without him. He makes me be more than what I could possibly be on my own. That is what a partner is for. To give you what you cannot have by yourself.
If you need a partner to make your financial ends meet, or to validate yourself, then something is wrong with you, and you need to consider why you feel that way, because that sounds like a mental issue.
Juan Smith
You are pretty incoherent here but I'll say I also don't feel like I need a partner. I just wanted to have kids and she was kind and sexy, so why not?
Romance is kind of a myth, but if you find someone who adds something to your life without being a burden, take it. Having children is a huge, life ruining project but much more retarding m rewarding than a romantic relationship will ever be, and you get to have sex whenever you feel like it
Andrew Mitchell
I don't need a general someone, I like being on my own. Being with my boyfriend is so much better than being on my own, tho. I do want my boyfriend, so much, and I always felt (since the very beginning) that I belong with him.
He's the best person I've ever met. Genuinely. Every time I talk to him, even if I've been with him for quite a while, I am amazed by how much of good guy he is. I smile to myself and just am happy I'm with him. He pushes me out of my comfort zone and he made me grow as a person so much since we got together. I'm enough by myself, but am so much better with him. He's funny, and *really* smart. Everything feels fun with him, even sitting on the couch watching old nip/tuck episodes while eating take away food, or a 4 hours car ride. He makes everything entertaining just by being there. He's a great partner. He's my best friend. He's the man I want to have children with. I trust him with all myself, and there's very little in the world that would make me doubt his love for me. I smile every time I think about him, and smile thinking about how he looks at me. I'm genuinely happy with him, like I've never been before.
I am genuinely looking forward to the rest of my life, because it seems awesome that I get to spend it with him. And for the first time I don't want to rush, but I want to enjoy every day, every lazy boring minute, every dinner on the couch. He's great. A good partner is basically the best asset you can have in life.
Easton Green
Her perspective in life is beautiful. She's extremely smart, trustworthy, and hard working. The way her brain works and watching her work through problems is fascinating. They way we fit together when we snuggle. Her dogs, her family, and her punches. Her obsession with food and lack of materialistic tendencies. And the fact that despite me being a weird, autistic son-of-a-bitch, she loves me for who I am. Wholeheartedly gives me all the love and affection a man can ask for. Probably going to marry her.. :]
>You have a partner because it adds something, not because it completes you. You should never be dependant on someone. You are an individual first and foremost.
And this is a problem of mine. I see it from the other perspective though, that I can't add anything to someone's life. It's a confidence issue on top of having trust issues.
It's nice to read all this though, the love that everyone has for their partner.
>You are pretty incoherent here
Yeah, I was having trouble with how to say what I wanted to say. My mind goes blank when I try to talk about this stuff.
My mind always finds a way to push people away, almost like I am rejecting them before I get rejected to lessen the heartbreak. Again, its trust issues and lack of confidence. I don't know if I'll ever let myself believe that someone loves me unconditionally, it's always in the back of my mind that they want something from me.
I'm whining though, aren't I. I'm not sure of the problem, nor how to resolve it.
Anthony Gonzalez
>And this is a problem of mine. I see it from the other perspective though, that I can't add anything to someone's life. It's a confidence issue on top of having trust issues. No one really knows what they can add to someone's else's life, and you dont have to. I was bewildered that he wanted me, because I saw nothing of value I could provide him, even sex would never be proper for him because of a physical issue I have that makes sex extremely difficult.
But if you just work on yourself, and always seek go improve and become a better person, then someone will notice something in you that will add value to them.
It's always hard to know what value you can add, because you dont know what others would value in the first place. It's such a individual thing, that it can barely be put into words most of the time. I am not even sure what value he brings me, but it has been clear from the start how much happier I am with my life now. It added the cream on top of my life that makes it all feel a little better. If the cake itself had been terrible, adding cream on top wouldn't have fixed anything, which is why it is so important to make sure you are happy with who you are, and the progress you make in your life.
Camden Russell
I always feel like improving myself when someone new comes around. I start exercising more and eating better, spending more times on my hobbies and less on YouTube/Netflix. Then the negative thoughts creep in and eventually I roll back downhill and push the person away. Maybe I'm bipolar.
James Turner
i generally hate the person im with, but im too afraid to break it off. i can enjoy being with them but its never a long lasting feeling.
>its me
Joshua Ward
Best friend who's always there and a financial partner. If they're ok with money and have a decent job you can afford more. That's the most objective non intimate answer I can give. Outside of that it's pretty cool too.
It's up to you, user. If you feel good alone then to me it's "if it ain't broke don't fix it". There are wonderful things that come with a relationship but also you can really put your heart and self identity at risk.
Adrian Cruz
this I also understand this
my gf and I just got engaged and we're coming up on 10 years together.
When we met in 2009 I was the same, I was 19 and in college and she kept wanting to hang out with me. She was really cool and I felt like if we ever hung out together without some kind of buffer friends, she'd figure out I was lame and uninteresting.
It took a while for me to feel comfortable around her and after a while we started dating. It's a little like that at first, feeling like every date has to be amazing or she'll get bored. The best kind of dates ended up being like going to McDonald's at 2am during finals.
All I would say is, don't reject someone on the possibility that you'll break up. Give it a try and if you still hate it, ghost her or whatever.
Nolan Sanders
tfw all of this was in the past I miss those little things like when she randomly called me just to ask what we're having for dinner
