>Met a girl two years ago
>Never started talking to her or taking her serious til recently
>Hang out, smoke pot, eat, watch movies together, do fun things together
>After about two months of getting to know her confess my feelings to her that I like her since i started to
>She rejects me, tells me she doesnt see me more than friends
>Move on, ghost her, etc. Why waste my time as an adult when i got work, school, and other girls to talk to
>A week later her sister hits me up
Should I even bother replying her sister or not even care user? Obviously she knows i probably confessed my feelings to her sister, they probably talked, trying to see where things are at. I feel being 25 I could be doing other things than to be wasting it with girls who probably want to just use you to vent or waste your money. Since I hit 23 and got out of a crazy 2 year relationship, to me its not worth being friends with girls you like. Why? Because its going to hurt when that girl talks to other guys, dates other guys, when if she wouldve been with you everything would be fun, since everytime you hang out its fun. Is this horrible? Not sure, I just feel that getting older relationships dwindle, having to be an adult becomes real, and theres no use wasting time in relationships you see meaningless. Let me know if user thinks I am just thinking normally or somethings wrong.
Why bother
Something's wrong, but most of Jow Forums are literal children who think confessing is more than just an anime meme. You're not alone.
You’re thinking like an adult.
Time is short, don’t waste it on things that benefit you in no way.
The girl probably just wants to smoke all your weed.
Maybe this is the wrong place to talk about things, been on Jow Forums for years and I feel that more and more children seem to be taking over this website.
I just know whats going to come up next, something in the line of,"So all this time you were just trying to get in my pants, just want me for sex, blah blah". Feel like girls dont understand that when a guy gets put down, and he doesnt want anything platonic, they have to go around and let the world know that they are thirst guys or something. Tired of girls thinking that, I just tell myself its not worth the squeeze to waste time with girls I like and dont feel the same. I got enough friends to smoke weed with, I dont need another one thats just going to just smoke all my shit.
That’s completely understandable.
If she wants to just talk shit about you calling you thirsty and horndog or the like, don’t even bother with her. That shits awkward putting yourself out there and not having the feelings mutual. If she can’t understand that, she’s childish and just cut all contact. She’ll forget about you in a month anyways.
Thanks for the response user, not sure why her sister hit me up, im not going to reply, but i think im just going to hit the delete button on her messages and number and move on with my life. I saw another post here about a week ago where someone referenced you should never be friends with girls you like or exgirlfriends, definately something i live by.
I'unno, apples and trees. I don't see wasps swarming one apple on a tree and decide an apple a whopping six feet away is going to magically be spared something with a hunt radius that's measured in miles.
You wrote too much to just ask, "Is she tryna play me?" Stop caring so much, and I know that sounds callous but you're letting it get to you.
Up to you if you hit up the sister. You'll hear about the other from one of them so it's up to you if you wanna keep dipping your toes in that family pool.
You're right, I guess working with physicists, i just overthink everything, even relationships.
>mfw I'm in my thirties and I smoke all my 24yo gf's weed without paying shit
You're not any better for letting her, and then confessing ...you know, instead of building attraction and seal the deal with her on your own fucking terms. I swear to god, every single night I'm on her I have to tell user the same exact thing
When it came to weed we were mutual, we smoke each other out depending on who had any. I dont have any weed, when I confessed she smoked me out that night.
You keep missing the crucial point.
Explain
You:
>letting girl hang around for months
>acting as a friend
>confessing (YIKES)
>being fucking 25 and doing this
Guys who get laid
>tell girls to come over
>build attraction
>kiss
>take off clothes
>fuck
>repeat
>I didnt talk to her serious until about two months ago.
>I took her out to eat, wed go out and do things, wed hang out at my place, id hang out at her place. I expressed intent with her when talking with her and text messages of interest, i flirt with her, I know i let her know my interests when when i started getting more serious with her.
How is all that acting as a friend? Her and her family knew ive liked her. I just openly confessed that night how i felt being more real about it. Im not trying to get laid, I was about trying to find a relationship.
See here's the thing though. If you're treating a friend who is a girl differently than a friend who is a guy, you're basically trying to date her without telling her what you're doing. That's bullshit.
My impression is, this girl didn't mean anything to you until you started seeing her as a sexual prospect. You're here crying about how you aren't going to let someone use you, when in reality you thought you were trading "being nice" as a setup for pussy. You "forgot" to tell the owner of the pussy that, but you're still upset that she didn't know.
You're trying to come up with rationalization for not talking to the sister mainly because you're embarrassed, but you don't want to just admit that to yourself.
Who knows, you could respond to her and find out she "likes" you, and then all of a sudden you're back to "I didn't take her seriously til recently".
If you want a romantic relationship and you have feelings for a girl that you need to get over, then yeah, it's a good idea to get some separation. If you can't like a girl without the overwhelming urge that you need to put your dick in her though, that's not really liking someone.
If you can't be friends with girls, then stop pretending that's what you're doing.
In the future, don't even bother with this "let's hang out and be friends" shit, just be honest about what you're looking for.
#
Girls can be your friends too if you like their personalities enough; but for the sound of it you simply don't seem interested in hers if that's all she is got to offer you.
That's okay as far as I'm concerned, going your separate ways and moving on it's something that just about everyone deals with in their life at some point.
As the saying goes, just let her know how you feel xD
I would reply to her sister and be straight about it.
You shouldn't need to listen to every problem or freely spend your money on your friends if you don't feel comfortable doing those things.
As for the broader picture, the more mature you get the more frequently you will likely face serious topics like money and kids in your relationships, not everything is going to be fun and games.
I suggest you get ready to be serious when you need to be so that you can deal with those times quickly and then get back to enjoying yourselves in your future relationships.
I didnt make it a friends thing, I would constantly let her know my interests. I just didnt have the time to focus on making any moves since schools more important to me than girls. Ive known her but I didnt get to start to "know" her until I started talking to her two months ago. I let her know my intentions when I took started taking her serious.
Let me guess. You let her know by *telling*, instead of *showing*. Yeah, no, not going to get her warmed up. What do you think building attraction entails?
Ive kissed her months before i started taking her serious, i built attraction, but instead of being the type of guy that just wants to sleep with girls i wanted to get to know her. I complimented her, did what I could, I just did things different this time...
The fuck didn't you say so in the OP? This is important for context ffs.
You know what, I'm out. I can't deal with how people start relationships in countries outside Scandinavia. Where I'm from we fuck first, and then get to know each other intimately both physically, personally, spiritually, whatever. It seems to work out. I will never understand why people are so hung up with seperating sex from relationship building, when it's such a crucial part of it. You should have fucked her ages ago, and I bet the reason she put you in the friendzone was namely because you didn't make any moves after you started taking her 'seriously'. Women seriously want to be banged.
>It seems to work out
>Scandinavians have one child per family
>sometimes two but rarely
I had to get my thesis done, I could care less about a girl as opposed to education, theres a dime a dozen here in Germany. Thats what I used to do, bang before relationship. But all my friends here in town tell me thats not the "right" way to make a relationship. Tell me you should "Know" a girl first before just banging. Told myelf, alright cool, ill try it with this girl i met two years ago, we made out going out a couple months ago, and I guess for waiting to long everything went to shit... Imma take your advice user, fuck it im done trying to just take it easy to prove im not in it for the pussy and trying to play it like a gentlemen, but I guess whats it matter, thats what it generally takes before. Im going back to my old ways...
I got two siblings. My parents are still together after 45 years (35 married).
Statistics are good and all, but don't let them get in the way of reading my actual opinions as such. Fuck the american dating ritual. You're wasting time and money for nothing of importance, and it's so incredibly boring. We all get divorced all the same, anyway.
Bravo. And I don't mean be a dick about it. Treat your women good, but that includes physically.
That's how many people do it in the USA, too. There isn't some dichotomy where you're on the better end of things.
You're full of shit. Yeah, sure you made it clear that you were spending time with her because of romantic interest.
Why bother to shift your story around? Dude that's just fucking pathetic. We're all anonymous here. When you act like a chump, recognize it and decide to act better instead of retreating to the land of make-believe.
This is about as pathetic as you being afraid to talk to the sister.
You're a fucking idiot. "Durr I read a book about how to seduce women, I'm sex genius."
At this point the biggest problem with OP is that he's a liar who has to change his story out of embarrassment, not that he didn't follow the Retard Guide to Seduction.