ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

women how would you react if a guy said on the first date "Ive really enjoyed this date. regardless of if we have sex sometime in the future or not I need to know, are you into spanking, hairpulling, choking in the bedroom. if you are we can go on more dates, but if you aren't I don't want to waste either of our precious time."

incel

Just talk to her and see if you can ask her out.

>all these assumptions about a random user
Everyone has different lives, no two people are in the exact same position, and you are telling user what he should be doing with his own life rather than offering advice.
28 is not too old to be working on having a good career and not everyone even wants kids. You and especially the user are responding to are missing the entire point of dating.
Kill yourself.

I'm a dude, but this is an easy one. You are saying overlap on fetishes is the most important thing to date you. Do you really think it's the best way to start a relationship even if she is into the same shit as you?

>Everyone has different lives, no two people are in the exact same position

But there are patterns. If he is in her same place after 8 years, then he is growing up at all.

Women: how do you feel about the truth that some men masturbate to the thought of you?

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I'm not enraged I'm sad. I don't care if that's what she believes really (if I'm bot dating her, but then again, I guess there's a chance there's some women like that I could work with), I just feel embarrassed and think I should've already known that she wasnt interested and that it wouldn't have ever been a thing to begin with.

I wish I were never born.

no its not about the fetish for me. I just want a girl with a high sex drive, and don't want to go on more than 1 date to find out. I've wasted my time before going on 3-4 dates to start fucking a girl who can't keep up with my sexual needs. So I want a way to weed them out faster. If you can think of a better line I'm all ears.

How can you tell the difference between a woman laughing at your jokes because she's interested or laughing just because you're funny? This thread, , seems to imply that anytime a woman laughs at an unfunny joke it means she's interested but I find that hard to believe. I thought laughing at bad jokes was more of a social courtesy rather than a show of interest

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How do you know she is not into you? Why did you jump into this depressive spiral out of the blue?

In general or because men are wanking to you

>If you can think of a better line I'm all ears.

There's no good line for what you are asking. That's the point I'm trying to make.

There are thousands of reasons to stop dating someone, but you picked "sexual fetishes" (Your question is not about drive, but acts during sex).

That's your main reason to filter people, do you see that? Do you see what it says about a relationship with you?

she keeps a lot of eye contact
she hovers around you a lot
she often finders her way over to you at social event or work events or at school
its not about one sign

No. That's just your opinion on what a grown up should be.
And if that's the case and he is in that position, then what the fuck are you saying to him exactly?
That he has to suddenly make up for all those years you somehow think didn't happen just to have something basic to human beings?

I do see what it says about it says. I want them to know sex is a very part of any relationship I'm in. I need to be intellectually, emotionally, and physically stimulated. Neither supersedes or makes up for a lack of the other.

very important*

>That he has to suddenly make up for all those years you somehow think didn't happen just to have something basic to human beings?

First we need to know if he is there. He stopped replying, so you are projecting a lot of yourself on him.

>I need to be intellectually, emotionally, and physically stimulated. Neither supersedes or makes up for a lack of the other.

But you don't ask about their intellect, you ask about their sex. So they are not as important.

I've already figured out their intellect an hour into a date with them. So I don't need to directly ask about it. I figured the sex part I could ask, and the emotional part is the only one that truly takes time to find out, but tends to be the factor that determines long term relationship success

We both work in the same job.

I talked to her and asked if she was. I told her that if she was trying to say she was interested, than that's impressive and after she said she wasn't, I tried to downplay by fudging out something about I didn't want to be an asshole but in a better way than it sounds when I post it as pure text to Jow Forums.

I'm depressed because I can't read girls and so far, every girl (two girls, but still) thought might be since I started actually working up the courage to indulge any women was a lesbian.

Actually no it's 3 but the first one was a straight girl who lead me on because she's fucking retarded and didnt know the repercussions of asking me that.

I thought I was attractive. People have said I am... they say they like talking to me and that I'm smart and sometimes compare me to celebrities but they're lying. One of them called me tall, but I'm on the short side. I obviously can't tell they're just being nice.

I've never had sex.
Girls, why have you spread your legs and let some men enter your flower, yet have not granted such privilege for me?

>I've already figured out their intellect an hour into a date with them.

>the emotional part is the only one that truly takes time to find out,

You are closing off the date with a question about sex. As smart and emotional as you say you are, you ignore the impact of that act.

But go ahead. You are emotional enough to understand how they feel and smart enough to learn about it, so ask your question and see how it goes.

If my girlfriend and I amicably broke up last month, is there a way to get her back? She still calls me up just to chat, and we've met up a handful of times since the break up. I think she lost attraction due to me acting a teeny bit clingy, but now that I'm self aware I'll be fine. And I know that she's been talking to other men but hasn't had any real luck yet, Is there any way to do it?

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>I talked to her and asked if she was.

Even a straight girl that was interested in you would respond badly to that. Unless you are like, 10. Adults don't talk like that.

What is it?

Well I've never actually tried it, which is why I asked it here. My honest feelings about it, is it wouldn't work. Worst case they get offended and the dates over, best case probably they just laugh it off.

Ask if she'd like to join you for dinner or lunch next time she's free. Bring up your relationship and see if she'd like to try again. Granted, if it was her decision initially, it might be more work on your part to win her back. Best of luck to you, user

>My honest feelings about it, is it wouldn't work.

Great, so we are on the same page.

I went on a date this weekend, she seemed into me, gave me her #, texted me back the day after and said she'd like to hang out again sometime.

I want to fuck her and I think she'd be down because she gave me some looks and we got a little touchy but I didn't do much. What should I say to her to let her know I'm interested? Last text I sent her was generic "hey I had a good time last night etc" and she was like "Yeah me too do it again yadayada :)"

Whatever you're going through, it will end eventually, whether you can handle it or not. It will end.

The problems you're facing are most likely temporary, even if they last a long time, like weeks or months. This means, one day you'll be in a new phase in life where things are better, or at least have the opportunity to be better.

And remember there's really no such thing as failure when you think about it. Failure only exists when you accept it and allow yourself to be defeated. If you don't accept failure, then you only can learn and grow from your mistakes. The bigger the mistake, the bigger potential you have to grow.

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How was he supposed to ask?

You don't set up sex by text. Have you kissed her? If you haven't even kissed her don't jump the gun and start worrying about sex yet.

You flirt, you ask her out, and if she is interested she'll go out with you.

Being too afraid to show interest will stop you from dating.

>Being too afraid to show interest will stop you from dating.
I wish I could get this through my thick fucking skull

No, but this whole thing felt pretty casual more than a potential relationship. Neither of us are looking for super serious I'm pretty sure, but we hit it off. I probably should have tried when I was sitting next to her on her bed or she started doing footsies but I didn't for whatever reason.

All I really want to know is how to escalate. Just go for the kiss or what? Set up a second date?

hang out again and just go for the kiss when you're sitting close to each other or whatever, put your arm around her, she seems into you but if you do nothing again she wont be

I wasn't too afraid. I expressed interest.
Also what's this "adults" bullshit? I have to work with what I have.
I only said I didn't want to be an asshole after she showed no interest. I told her I was impressed and I tried to guage her interest first before I asked her out. If I got an ambiguous response, I would've offered and it would be clear from the context that she expressed interest that I would be interested.

Just an office type job.

>I told her I was impressed and I tried to guage her interest first before I asked her ou

You told her you were impressed that shw hit on you, which she didn't. So you showed you can't tell girls apart by face. That's assuming she belived you and didn't think it was a pick up line.

Next time, just talk to her, get to know her, and ask her out.

What do you just want me to falsify my personality and act like I'm some cocky super flirtatious dude?
That's not me.
She wasn't physically very attractive so what did I have to work with besides I was impressed?

Yeah we are, I was just hoping my crazy idea wasn't as crazy as I thought it might be. It seems like it is though

If you can't even kiss her, don't plan for sex. Start small. Try to find a moment to kiss her next time.

Wait you were sitting next to her on her bed? and you didn't try anything?!? you are lucky that you haven't fucked this up already

As a hypothetical, it makes me feel better about myself. But if someone tells me outright, it becomes a problem.

If I'd known I would feel like th is afterwards and post to this thread again, I never would've said anything.
I should not have let this conversation go this far.
What do you want me to do then user? Kill myself? I can do that and it seems that's probably what you want.
Confirm that for me. Show me your full spectrum of cynicism. Tell me what you think you know about me. Tell me you think I'm an "incel".

>What do you just want me to falsify my personality and act like I'm some cocky super flirtatious dude?

No one said that. Just flirt awkwardly if that's your speed, but flirt.

>What do you want me to do then user? Kill myself?

I want you to learn, but you are a drama queen so I bet your next post will be more whinning.

And you do the same thing as her, with the same studies and work experience as her. You have the same goals at this point of your life as her. Is that right?

what was it like to be a young girl before you hit puberty?

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If a guy kisses me on the neck while hugging is it safe to assume he wants to bang

when is it ok to hit a woman?

Your anus is not a sex organ

Don't worry I'm not into anal, I'm asking a different thing

Just casually talk about fetishes. But don't say that last bit, that's kind of assholey.
Certainly an ego stroke, but I'm allways valued as a sex object anyway. Now if you jerk off to something I said or did, that means a bit more. :3
You're probably an ugly autist.

why do you even want to hit anyone at all? Just walk away and get a hold of yourself

I know
The only reason I didn't was because her roommate was in the room. I would have gone for it otherwise. Her roommate had a broken leg and couldn't leave (legit crutches and shit not even kidding). Idk maybe it wouldn't have even mattered.

meant for

When you feel it's necessary.

you should have just suggested going to a different room lol
the fact that she keeps talking to you must mean she likes you a lot because you kinda messed up, set up a second date and make a move for real next time

yeah the roommate does change things. But you need to kiss her on the second date or this will fizzle out fast.

The roommate explains why they didn't kiss, but it's not an excuse for OP thinking about bringing sex up by text message.

Yeah I know that for the most part, I was very close to going for it and if the roomie weren't there I probably would have on the bed. We were also both very high. She would have been receptive towards it I'm 99% sure.

My main questions now I guess are when should I set up a second date and should I say anything to show that I'm sexually interested, or just wait until we hang out again?

Never you retard. Only literal animals resort to violence. You're not a brain dead savage, are you?

I didn't mean literally say "dtf" or something like that, I meant more like telling her she's cute or flirting more or whatever.

Set up a second date as soon as possible. Don't wait an arbitrary amount of time. You will be showing sexual interest if you make the date and obvious date and not just 2 friends chilling.

Don't hide behind her roomie and your phone. Flirt with her in person.

>say anything to show that I'm sexually interested
>show that I'm sexually interested
>show

emphasis on that word
actions >>> words

next time you see her compliment the way she looks in her outfit. don't say I like shirt, or shoes, or dress. and don't say you are cute or hot or beautiful.

Say, I like the way that dress shows off your legs. Or, I like the way your hair highlights that cute smile of yours. I like the way you fit into those jeans.

It shows you are obviously checking her out, but not being an ass about it, and you are complimenting her.

what?

Yeah I will
For what it's worth she said she was mainly looking for "friends with benefits"

Alright, by obvious date do you mean like taking her out to eat or something? I don't plan on texting her constantly and mainly using it to set up the real date, but I'm mostly just wondering if I should show any sort of hinting before asking her out again, let her know for sure that I'm interested and then make it clear next time

Girl I like keeps being hit on by weebs, nerds and other losers, and she rejects them nicely. I want to ask her out because she seems to like me, but if she rejects me it would put me in the same category as those losers, and I'd rather kill myself desu. What do ?

see above. its a clear way of establishing sexual interest and being clever and charming.

Good advice. I'll do that definitely. First I need to set up a second date and see when that will be.

ask her out you absolute pussy. and tell us what happens

You're making excuses to justify your fear. Even if she rejects you, man up and move on. Never let a woman that was never yours be the reason for your pain.
Ask her out for dinner.

It's not really that I'm afraid of asking her out. I don't care about that, if she says no then I'll just move on. The problem is that my social status and confidence are already pretty low, so if I get rejected my social status would sink into iredeemable territory. I'm already the dude who fails everything he does, I can't add a rejection to that. What I might do is ask her out at the very end of the semester, so if it fucks up I can just ghost during the summer I guess, and start fresh in uni

You all still have almost 3 months to convince me to go to that wedding. Good luck!

Let me go instead.

I'm pretty sure girls think I'm stuck up, despite me not intending to come across that way. How do I know for sure? What do I do about it?

You would bring shame to my famiry. That's not acceptable.

Girls, what's your excuse?

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you insecure little faggot you'll never get laid

Alright fine I guess it didn't work because I wasn't actually interested and was being desperate and nice.
I had nothing to work with because I didn't care and thats probably what she picked up.
She was easier to talk to because I figured I wouldn't care if she turns me down.

Its just confusing because I don't understand standards. That said, I don't have many options left at my age so I can't afford to be picky and I can't base it on looks on looks because that's not a real criteria.
I am ashamed of myself for presenting myself that way. I really wish I could go back in time to when I was younger.
I'm just so bottom of the barrel now, even though I look young. I can't believe this is me. I thought women liked me. They used to. At least, they thought they liked me until they talked to me. Then I don't know.
Its so hard to think positively right now.
I need to tell me doctor to decrease my meds so I'm hopefully not getting this sad.

Aight fuck you then

nah, it's fine. or rather it can be; you're right at the upper limit of acceptability there. expect to field the occasional uncomfortably pointed question from people you know, to be suddenly regarded with tentative suspicion by people you've just met recently, and to be caught off guard by shitty remarks in the company of either. take none of it personally; it amounts to a shit test, they're just unsure and feeling you out. handle it with poise and grace when it happens. it'll colour your reaction if you allow yourself to feel wounded by the seeming harshness of it. people will chill once they see the two of you together, how you interact, etc awhile. expect to find her friends tedious. take great care to make a good impression on her folks, and don't delay once you're given the opportunity to meet them.

How do I not sound so autistic and unsubtle when flirting? God damn it I make it too obvious sex is what I want

>Anywhere outside. Or online. Above all, leave your comfort zone.
I go to an all-boys high school, and all my friends are male. I wouldn't think online dating is an option where I live.
Any advice?

>high school
Go away minor