How do you cope with having missed out on teenage love?
No matter what, whoever your find now, you won't be their first, and neither will the feelings be as strong as they would have been then.
How do you cope with having missed out on teenage love?
You are living right now and there is ample opportunity for a happy life. Why would I care about a past I didn't even experience?
>No matter what, whoever your find now, you won't be their first, and neither will the feelings be as strong as they would have been then.
That is a projection with little base in reality. There is no such thing as ideal teenage love. In fact ir does bear little substance as most teenagers are too moody to form lasting relationships.
Teen love is as disposable as the love notes they write.
we all miss out on a lot of things. you will just have to accept this, and move on
>You are living right now and there is ample opportunity for a happy life. Why would I care about a past I didn't even experience?
cope
>That is a projection with little base in reality. There is no such thing as ideal teenage love. In fact ir does bear little substance as most teenagers are too moody to form lasting relationships.
No, but it is objective fact that the hormones would have been stronger as well at that you would not be their first today.
>teenage love
Teenagers are dumb, emotional, flippant, unpredictably disloyal/loyal to themselves, and of course my favourite, teens just don't have the experience to be serious about life.
Happy to have passed on the drama and immaturity of it, to be honest.
This. Of course there's cute teenage couples who are innocent/naive enough to feel like the first people to ever experience love and desire.
Most teenage couples are not like that. Teenagers are cruel, short-sighted, emotionally super unstable, and tend to be absolutely overwhelmed with their personal development to the point where they easily forget other people have wants and needs. It's not for nothing that most relationships at that age last a few weeks to a few months before a big fight happens.
The idea that love will feel less intense as you age is not a rule by any stretch. For some people it's that way, for others not at all, because they got serious about love, they realize more how special it is for someone to like you so much, or they finally meet people they are actually compatible with and don't just lust after.
Missing out is a part of life, part of living one individual lifetime. You can cry over that or you can mourn it and not let it spoil your present. Being hung up on this idea of a perfect teenage relationship is not going to do you favors with relationships you build now, is not fair to a prospective partner, and would be unfortunate and tragic even if it were legitimate.
>cope
A concept used by incels and "alphas" to hurt themselves.
>No, but it is objective fact that the hormones would have been stronger as well at that you would not be their first today.
Hormones are still strong enough when you are 50 years old. You are dramatizing. And it doesn't matter if you are the first, second, third or... It's about two people falling in love, getting to know each other, connect on an emotional and physical level. That is each time a new process. Chances are only that you are more and don't last as long during sex.
>all this shit
>just to say "teenagers are demonstrably dumb"
I couldn't get the fuck out of high school and away from my teen years fast enough. Fuck it, fuck it all, fuck people being whimsical douchebags, fuck people being self-serving and entitled cunts, fuck people being hedonistic slags and fuck people having all these wound-up notions about what a relationship is and entails.
Fuck teenagers and fuck idiots who buy into the romance they never ever get to live. One in every ten thousand teenage couples is anything like OP describes or thinks and the rest are probably just sluttier than he could imagine.
I don't get why Jow Forums romanticizes the teen years.
>I don't get why Jow Forums romanticizes the teen years.
They are creating a larger than life ideal they possibly can't live up to. So they can blame their lacking dating life on not fitting this ideal. It's an excuse for not even trying to work on their their current situation and just being bitter in general.
>One in every ten thousand teenage couples is anything like OP describes or thinks and the rest are probably just sluttier than he could imagine.
But that is the issue. Anyone you find right now would have experienced that, unlike you. It's not like they stop being hedonistic slags just because they grow older, when it's done it's done.
teen love is fucking horrible and always ends in heartbreak or a failed marriage.
Also I wasn't her first lmao
You're lucky, do not want to know how young love is.
I actively avoided teen romances because they were always shallow and caused nothing but misery. One day I hope to have a husband. That's the most pure form of love, when you dedicate yourselves to one another and promise to be together through thick and thin.
Escapism, then.
You've lost me. What's the issue here? If you're not a slag, why slag around? Why be bummed that you didn't? I wasn't a slag and I didn't slag around and I don't care who experienced it. All the guys I know who did are in their thirties and don't care, they're busy trying to secure careers. A few got married/are taken.
The problem is your set of values, man. Why is teenage sex so valued to you? I never had it and I don't care.
Nobody regrets missing out on retarded teenagers acting like retarded teenagers. They don't know what love is.
If they all slagged around, then anyone you meet right now would have had that experience while you didn't.
I'm feeling it more now than I ever did as a teen. Feels pathetic at this age but I'm going to milk it as long as I can desu, even though I don't see things working out in the end.
So what? Why does that matter?
And? If you have a fucking point, make it already. I'm tired of hearing about your shitty high school career and how much you regret it.
Of course it would matter that they experienced this vital part of life that nearly everyone else also did. You'd be vying for sloppy seconds, that's for sure.
I will tell you about teenage love.
I had this girl(15), my soulmate that I(14) loved and wanted to marry.
We spent 2 years together.
The hottest sex I ever had to this day.
She when grew up and became a totally different person.
Conclusion: Hot sex but she caused the biggest pain I ever experienced in life.
Honestly, while I admire the days spent with her, a good and lasting relationship would totally beat the short but nice romance.
Especially because you'll forget, the girl I loved to death is almost forgotten now after 10 years.
Some special moments remain but the most are just faint memories of her.
This idea that only the first time matters is often used by people who like to think of themselves as sensitive and romantic, but it's hugely shallow and immature.
You think a second child is "eh, been there done that" for their parents? That every single time you have sex with a person it becomes less special? That you will never have a bond with friends the way you did with your first childhood friends?
Basically, that life's wonder is only in novelty and initial excitement?
This is bullshit but even if it were true, that would mean every relationship is bound to become mundane and boring over time and we might as well kill ourselves before we run out of "first"s.
It's not really that vital. Also having sex with someone who has been in a relationship before isn't "Sloppy seconds".
>Vital part of life
Dude, it isn't something everyone experiences. Our generation is having progressively less sex, both males and females. It's just that the ones that do have sex are having more sex. Humans aren't lollipops that get dropped on the floor. You sound like a child. I'm a KHV female that's never had a boyfriend and I'm 22. It's really not a big deal.
>It's not really that vital.
>Also having sex with someone who has been in a relationship before isn't "Sloppy seconds".
>Dude, it isn't something everyone experiences.
>Humans aren't lollipops that get dropped on the floor.
I disagree with this.
The average age of losing virginity is 16.1, and it follows that around half are younger than this.
That in no way refutes what I said. Keep holding onto your victim mentality. It's not going to make people like you.
That's self-reported though. I would suggest a lot of people lie about it and push the average down.
I cope by not giving a shit in the first place. I feel much more left out by not experiencing friendship beyond a computer screen in high school than dumb teenager "love."
About that idea of less intense love when aged up, I recently got a bad event in my life because of that. I found out of pure luck a girl that was really nice, really intelligent and cute, even thought she was two years older than me. We started to make out for almost a month when she saw on my computer that I was making out with another girls as well. I didn't stopped with the others because I already had fallen enough times to fall again, so I would only go with all my hopes when I tought it was secure, and I guess that this event could match this idea if the watcher was outside of my side.
So I guess you can say that people tend to create ways of protecting themselves from this idea of love, but that it gets less intense I guess not.
Btw, I got really sad for what had happened to me, but I don't know if I will try to begin trusting others by what happened, I may be severely damaged right now to trust someone so fast, and even though this costed the most awesome girl I had yet found.
This is very unfortunate but as you said yourself it is a result of self-protection and/or past damage. When people age they usually have the idea that young people are blank slates, wholesome and undamaged, but that's not the case. For most people it works both ways, yes you get damaged in the process of life but you also heal from things and overecome them. Many quite young people also protect themselves with a cynical outlook. It is part of maturing that you learn to coach yourself through painful events. It is understandable to become more closed off because of certain things happening but the risk of getting hurt again is not worth not opening up again.
lmao are people's memories this bad or were they just oblivious?
relationships in peoples' teenage years are completely superficial, they were only ever about wearing like a status symbol
this is of course for normal upper middle or middle class people, it doesnt include the absolute hillbillies that skipped college, married and had children before they turned fucking 20
I mean I missed out on getting laid by thin, young, sexy girls in my teens too, only to reach my mid 20's to find the same women look like absolute fucking disaster zones
but I sure as shit don't feel I missed out on ~romance~
that's retarded
I know, isn't it great to be one?
This is what we mean when we say "you're doing it to yourself."
There's just no helping you people anymore. You live in a fantasy world made of pedantic arguments.
>whoever your find now, you won't be their first, and neither will the feelings be as strong as they would have been then.
So? Also nah the feelings will be stronger hardly anyone experiences real love in their teens.
It sucked for me. It was only good until I turned 15 then it was all downhill. And my childhood sucked too. I had a brief happy period in my really young years. Now I think I can find happiness though in adulthood.