GIOYC

I think applying OOD principles to my own life is based and redpilled.

Every now and then I can trick myself into optimism and hope, but it never lasts long, and I'm running out of potential tricks.

The irritations of this monotonous life are driving me to excessive, unintelligible feelings, but I can't switch off. Maybe I'm just a bad person after all.

How do you stop dwelling on things you've done that you're ashamed of? I recently started thinking about a weird perverted thing I did in the past and it's making me miserable. I know if my friends and family knew about they'd think differently of me (it isn't sexual assault or anything that'd hurt anyone else, just something really weird). I know it's the past but for some reason it's been plaguing my mind the past few days. Anyone have a similar experience before ?

LOL BET SHE LOOKING JUST LIKE DAT TOO

I want to be touched

THAT WAS A NICE MEMORIAL

I love you tho...

J
E
F
F

stop making fun of me >:(

Don't use dating apps... any of your. They're absolute fucking shit for just about almost everyone who uses them in one way or another.

Surely my crippling depression can't go on longer than seven years...

It's not reciprocated. I promise.

I wanted you so bad. The fire needed to breathe for the flame to get bigger. We were both gasping for air. Now, that fire is dead. I can't go back to the ruins of our love. I still care for you though. I hope you find a guy who will treat you the way I wanted to treat you. You will. And I'll still be alone; it's what I deserve.

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Even with how retarded and flawed Nazi ideology was, you might actually be right. If a single all controlling totalitarian power was able to control a substantial portion of the world's resources, in the centuries long time scale of humanity it would probably be a good thing, especially in the atomic era.

How do you keep fit and sane when your body is fucked up in so many different ways?
>born 3 months early, now 21
>circulation to extremities has been messed up since birth
>every single ligament has been weak since birth
>absurdly flexible as a result
>core and back muscles weak and less likely to switch on since birth, meaning I fucked up my back and crushed a vertebra last year doing squats, in a situation where the injury would never have happened for normal people
>back injury fully healed, no damage to the nervous system but a slight ache and the GP said to not lift above 10kg
>can't relax when sedentary as a result of this injury, lower back is basically permanently tensed up so that the muscles protect that section of the spine
>physio said I should be able to go way beyond 10kg but I'll need to work on core and slowly increase weight
>on another note, still unemployed 4 months out of university
>no money, cannot pursue hobbies, vegan parents so can't eat the right food or enough food to maintain muscle mass at home, cannot buy my own
>parents have been super fucking strict since childhood because I was born early, leading to seclusion and insecurity in adulthood
>constant depression and I have zero sense of accomplishment for anything at all
>younger brother got none of this
Is there even a fucking point? I'm so messed up physically I can't see any point in living

Let's be together.

youtube.com/watch?v=86cYacKLw5s

I have a crush on you but I don't know where to start.

Me either. Do you think I'm experienced in this? ...

mea culpa

I wish you all the happiness in the world. I know you don't love me, I know what was at stake but I will never regret loving you. Be well love, live a good life....that is all you owe me.

I regret it immensely. He was so fake and useless. I was an idiot to allow him to control me that way. Why? Because I loved him? I regret it every day.

please don't respond to me, this isn't about you.

?

I consider myself to be good, in that I wouldn't have treated you the same. Not a fucking chance. I do forgive you for taking advantage of me and contributing to the dismantlement of my self-worth. We were all kids, and I'm sure you needed the sense of security you felt when I shrunk at your side. I can forgive it, and yet I can't but blame you for what's become of me. You were so hung up on pissing furthest that my kindness was a step to climb, my weakness your vehicle. I'll forgive it, but I'm going to do my very best to become proud of myself. You'll call it narcissism or vanity. You were always uneasy around me because you knew that I had things to be proud of that I didn't. It's petty of me, but I'm going to use every single thing you envied to create something which utterly dwarfs you. I was meant for things like this, anyway. Never will I look at you with real hostility, but once I have achieved more than you ever could have, I know your identity is going to shudder. It's going to feel like I just chose to hold back all those years. And it'll probably hurt you. I won't call that my goal, but it's going to make me feel really, really good. I'm sorry for that, just like I'm sure you're sorry now about how you treated me. But we're not kids anymore.

I don't regret dying for him.

how many times did i masturbate to the thought of you despite thinking it "wasn't worth it?" i think i was really just afraid. when my friends became interested in you too, i couldn't keep talking to you like that. i knew you wanted the attention, and i wasn't about to ruin my friendships just to give it to you.

but you made out with two of my friends around that time, and i was disgusted. i was disgusted because you were leading them all on, and i was also disgusted because it could've been me from the start. and they didn't have a clue. maybe i should have made it clear to them, but it's too late. that next summer you started fucking him and abandoned the rest, and i thought you'd moved on, and i thought i'd moved on. now, sometimes, i wish i could take it back. i've still never been with a woman, and i can't help but imagine the things you would've done to me. i'll never again have the opportunity to love someone while i was a teenager, that time when it seems like such a good thing. i wish i would have at least told you that i really liked you that way, too.

but you are still fucking psycho. i dodged a bullet.

I do blame my mother for the abuse I suffered as a child from my father and then my step father. My father produced child porn of me, and my step father raped me vaginally and anally from the ages of 6 to 12. If my mother just had her fucking eyes open for half a second none of it would have happened

youtube.com/watch?v=POUOJSxcWlY

I'm sorry. You have a right to feel that way. She failed you. How does she feel now that she knows?

Let's do it! What's are you waiting for?

She knows about the child porn but not about my papa (my step father). He was always physically abusive and we fled him one night when it got real bad and never went back. I've never told her about what he did to me and I don't know if she knows or not.

She doesn't like to talk about my father. She says she "chooses to believe the positive," that he took photos and videos of him touching me and forcing himself in my mouth but "I was too little to do anything else to." I was 3.

Are you larping, son?

Yes. I just try to remind myself that it is something I've done, but I've learned from it and grown from the experience. What did you do? Mine is less weird and just shameful. I sucked a guy off for enough money to buy a new pair of sneakers when I was like 13

Just made some reddit camwhore delete her account. Feels good

How did you do it? Blackmail?

She posted a vid of her riding a dildo on top of a book called "Dogs" implying bestiality. Everyone was circlejerking her of course. I linked to a song called "White girls fuck dogs", she promptly deleted everything

The right moment to ask.

That was put in place so that they thought they had the upper hand. When in fact, it means nothing. To prove it would mean to out themselves.

they fell for literally everything

Exactly

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I don't have much left to do before I want to try and share my hobby with the internet. I have my equipment assembled for the most part but I got too many other responsibilities to get on top of first.

I was getting it down but something changed here and it broke the routine HARD with the irony of making the whole endeavour faster and more efficient hahaha! I'vetalked about this before in these threads, too. This is just one of things that has been at the back of my mind for the past long while. Writing about it here makes it feel like real potentiality.

When this is all over I'm going to get everything hooked up and do an actual test run. Then, well, I guess I'll look into what I should try to do first. Probably have to ask some questions on top of research. I dunno. I just want this to actually be a good thing for myself to try. I believe I need to talk more. I could say many a thing about the facets which lead me to believe that... but who has the time?

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This
Dating app corporations and what they do are as shady as it comes, from top to bottom.

You did what her mom and dad should have done long before.

Good parenting job, mate.

That's horrific. I'm so sorry you went through that. Maybe not the right time to say it but your mom sounds like a cunt

Do you really understand, I don't think you do.

Is there such a thing?

Thanks. The post is at gfycat com / anchoredthriftyindianskimmer

Her account is still up so she might start up again, but she deleted all the posts and comments

If there is a problem. just fucking talk with me.

I've had to take so many days off of work that I might be getting fired.

Yes. I'll only see them if my timing is right. That's what kind of situation this is.

Uh oh. Well, that guy is dead too.

Everyone on this board is a bluepilled normalfag who is either a girl or whiteknights for them

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Ewww. She's cool, chill, but I hope you used a condom

What determines your timing being right?

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Don't stalk me bro

dailymotion.com/video/x764qcw

his pants are falling down.

Lol...

I just sent some shockwaves to some.

My gf is such a negative and pessimistic person its making me depressed. She also doesn't listen to any of the advise I give her. I feel like I'm just with her because if I break up with her I'm gonna have no choice but to move back in with my parents.

Currently the class bell and the flow of students in a high school currently way over capacity. A lot of shyness.

I don't think he knows what to do either. Why does he keep staring? It's endearing and it's made me fall in love even more. I don't know what is happening. Just that I've found someone even shyer.

You should ask me before you start assuming some BS

What BS am I assuming?

Come on...they put spies all around. Give me a fucking break.

took adderall for 8 years and it was the best and worst thing i ever did

Can't stop feeling like everyone starts putting on kind of a false face as they get to know me better, like their tolerance level gets worse and they have to start faking it more. That, or they just start to feel more comfortable using me for whatever purpose. Maybe it's just me being out of my goddamn mind, but people do shady shit, and it makes me feel like a moron for ever being trusting. I'm sick of feeling this isolated.

I'm so boring, so passive. Apathy is the word, I think. No wonder nobody likes me, I don't even like myself.

It's guarded like area 51 around here.

Woah woah woah, buddy. You’re not getting off that easy. Spill some deets

Your dad lesbian and your mother straightn’t.

Where’s Moot tho?

This place is run by the CIA

ONCE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT MOVE YOUR GOING TO MAKE YOU’VE ALREADY LOST. ITS CALLED FIGHT OR FLIGHT AND WHEN THE DUCK ARE YOU GOING TO STOP FLYING

NO WORRIES I DON'T THINK AT ALL. I RUN ON 100% INTUITION.

Этo ж нe пpaвдa) it’s called NSA dual MKULTRA program.... it’s running on all fags on /sci who go on and on talking about their IQ since Boxxy

I feel so fucking alone

This is why you can't trust women and they don't have much integrity. They're not real adults like men are. And he women in here who act like they'd never behave like this and think they're good human beings, well i have news for you. ALL women think they're good people and they RATIONALIZE everything they do, and all they have to do is seek out someone to cosign their bullshit. All they care is about how they feel about what they do, they don't care about how it affects others.

I WISH I COULD DO THAT

May Queen

And it's totally fine women are how they are. My problem is when so many people act like women are something they're not. They're not like men. They're not honest because their communication style is not overt like men. If we red pilled every boy when he is young, women will lose so much power and will have to facr consequences for toxic feminine behavior.

YOUR JOB IS TO THINK ABOUT WHAT I'M DOING BECAUSE I CAN'T

my gf dumped me a month ago but I still love her so fucking much. And last week I got drunk and fucked one of my best friends, haven talked to him since, I just feel so lonely and ashamed

I developed a new way to treat people’s problems heal your minds.

>And last week I got drunk and fucked one of my best friends, haven talked to him since
>inb4 admitting to being bisexual and pretending to be confused by me
>inb4 your a girl
>if your a girl see picrel too
>inb4 then acting confused
>inb4 insults

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Richard Helms ordered all MKUltra files to be destroyed in 1973

Wonder what happened in 1973

Imagine if we lived in a world where women were constantly called out for their manipulation and dishonesty and we collectively shamed the types of women (which is most) like we shame sexual offenders.

Just because a woman is beat doesn't make her an innocent victim.

Women who are dishonest and manipulative with their significant other deserve to be treated poorly or used.

What’s your dna genre code m8