Thingken about Jow Forums

Why is Jow Forums so break-up and ghosting happy?

>my girlfriend took the last Sun Drop from the fridge, what do
>cue 50 replies saying to break up

>My mom never really did anything bad to me growing up, she was actually very loving and nurturing, but I ghosted her anyway many years ago. She's on her deathbed and her final request is to see me one last time. Should I go?
>just ignore her bro, u don't owe her nothin'

Why are 80 percent of the people here a bunch of selfish hedonists whose advice boils down to "if it feels good, do it, fuck everyone else"?

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Probably envy, bitterness, and unrelatability.

I agree. Breaking up is often a healthy choice but I think ghosting is a really inhumane, despicable and disrespectful way to treat someone unless you are concerned for your safety or are dealing with abuse.
Too many people cut ties and never learn skills like communication, assertiveness, and conflict resolution. It makes me pretty sad, it's toxic.

>cue 50 replies saying to break up
Tons of virgins who never been in a relationshit.

>just ignore her bro, u don't owe her nothin'
Factually correct observation. There is no correct way to handle the situation, so the person should act according to their beliefs. Anons can't make a decision for ya.

>"if it feels good, do it, fuck everyone else"
It's a decent way to live if you actually focus on the positive aspects of it and the "fuck everyone else" bits.

>but I think ghosting is a really inhumane, despicable and disrespectful way to treat someone unless you are concerned for your safety or are dealing with abuse

Couldn't agree more. Ghosting can leave emotional scars and leave people wondering "Why? What happened?" for the rest of their lives. Unless it's a matter of safety, it's an absolutely disgusting thing to do, and anyone who says it's okay to do it to good people because "u don't owe no one nothn'" needs to go hang themselves.

It can definitely leave emotional scars.
I really don't understand why ghosting has become the norm when ending a relationship, both casual and long term. It's not just on 4ch, people IRL and even "relationship experts" are always recommending it. Notice how mental health professionals never recommend it.

Yes it's good to put yourself first. Yes it's bad to put others before yourself when going through a difficult situation like a breakup, but do we really have to give up basic human decency?

>Ghosting can leave emotional scars
So can a well meaning fucking joke if the person is THIS sensitive.

It's definitely not nice but more often than not people who were ghosted displayed traits that make it a viable way. Tons of people just don't get a normal no and will begin spamming defensive shit, explanations, promises to change, justifications, insults and whatever fucking else. I bet most people who do ghost just had tons of negative experiences with the normal way.

The response to almost all relationship threads is to communicate with their partner directly and express their concerns. Since they chose to ask Jow Forums first, they're obviously not going to do that, meaning the relationship will sour and fester and turn into a bad breakup. So their best option is to skip to the end.

As far as ghosting, I'm on the same page. I don't know why 4channers hate being connected with people and respecting the family relationship, especially when so many of them are, or want to be "trad" or are literal fascists who glorify the family and having (white) children. Furthermore, so many of them, especially on Jow Forums, suffer mightily from isolation and loneliness, yet do everything they can to choose solitary hobbies, solitary careers, avoid their family, and avoid engaging with people socially as much as possible. Such a strange contradiction.

/adv is the most normie board on the site, that's why.

>So can a well meaning fucking joke if the person is THIS sensitive.

You're retarded, mate
Not only is ghosting (or as it was called in the old days, abandonment) a legitimately traumatic thing depending on the depth of relationship, but it's very, very common for people to ghost others - family members, romantic partners, close friends of many years - because it's easier than confronting them. It very often has nothing to do with their belief that the other person would give them no other choice.

The same reason why every single argument lodged against Jow Forums's advisors is locked firmly in ridiculous hyperbole.
Why would they bother submitting reasonable arguments when you're not going to do the justice of that for them? They have no reason to put the best foot forward.

Maybe you should be the change you want to see instead of using hyperbolic, non-existent examples to condemn people who are in all honesty probably being baited 80% of the time.

Also you're on Jow Forums what the fuck do you think is going to show up here? Fucking altruists bent on world improvement???

>people ending years long relationships by just ghosting without even breaking up
>b-buh sensitive snowflakes
Fuck off shitlord

>Also you're on Jow Forums what the fuck do you think is going to show up here? Fucking altruists bent on world improvement???

Why shouldn't I expect that? That's what I am.

>or as it was called in the old days, abandonment
That's not even close to what it is. Unless your mom ghosted you in the kindergarden.

>a legitimately traumatic thing depending on the depth of relationship
As can be a joke. Your autism is showing if you don't understand it.

>because it's easier than confronting them
Which sounds like a fair enough reason already. Most people don't like confrontations. And most suck at these too. How often does a "I don't want you being a part of my life anymore" work out without some bullshit from the other person?

Just accept the fact that you are a spineless asshole with a lack of common decency and empathy.

>Which sounds like a fair enough reason already.

Sure, if your compass for decision-making is purely "What makes ME the most comfortable?" rather than making any kind of ethical decision that takes the feelings of others into consideration.

Because there's no obligation for people to be nice here, and also you're not terribly altruistic if your idea of a sensible argument against Jow Forums is rooted firmly in hyperbole. A far more sensible standpoint against Jow Forums is

>Why does Jow Forums seem to defer to the most critical avenue of advice? Most often when they're offered a problem, the solution in return is the immediate jump to the most drastic and final option, for instance breaking up with a girlfriend, or ghosting someone who is texting you, or ignoring/eschewing filial piety.
>If Jow Forums claims to be out for helping people, shouldn't they be more focused on solutions with the potential to adapt and change to new information or circumstances, or that consider the sensitivity of concepts like history, complexes and present circumstances?
>This, instead of answers that can result in changes that cannot be unmade?

But no, here's you, targeting Jow Forums for being a bunch of hyperboles they're not. Ghosting is usually given when the person won't take 'no' for an answer and breakups are usually suggested because most relationships that surface on Jow Forums are fundamentally broken to the point that communication simply no longer occurs. As a result, 'break up' is the immediate answer because the thing that a relationship needs-- communication-- is generally absent.
I've not seen these hyperbolic examples you reference and I've been coming here since the board's inception. Amongst the saddest posts I've seen on Jow Forums are usually non-replied cope along the lines of woman-hating, and most of them get ignored, blown the fuck out or have a little circlejerk thread of their own and stay there.

I guess what I'm really asking is, "Why do you think of yourself as some example or gauge of reason when you can't even demonstrate it in your opening post?"

>"What makes ME the most comfortable?"
People are getting more selfish and narcissistic by the day, I swear. This seems to be a growing trend in outlook honestly.

Leave me alone, negro, I'm sick with a cold and not in prime debating form. Your greentext is basically what I'm getting at, yes. My hyperboles are the result of months of annoyance.

Are you seriously going to pretend that the shit happens often enough to be worth discussing? Most ghosting happens before it even got into a relationshit or with dying HS friendships.

But user, you're the one showing lack of empathy, failing to see how basically anything can seriously hurt feelz and affect people and failing to see how there are good reasons for ghosting.

And I bet you think I do/did it too, so extra failure at understanding, thinking only people who do said action speak in support of it.

You can take the feelings of others into consideration and still pick yourself over them, you know.

Really depends on the situation and there's a thin line. My therapist recommended me to ghost/stop talking/take distance from my ex because she was a subtle manipulator. Most of the time it's easier to do that. Staying in contact with your ex kinda makes it harder for the wound to heal and opens up the possibility for rebounds/more shit to happen. Humans are weak and our brain always seeks pleasure, leaving a relationship gets processed by our brains in a similar way death does so it is painful and you're really vulnerable because the love is lost and the person you were in love with is now gone, but still exists physically. It is truly weird for both ways.

>failing to see how there are good reasons for ghosting

Irrelevant to the thread's premise. The people here use ghosting as a first resort, not a last. Ghosting is sometimes justified. Jow Forums posters champion the practice as something that you should do all the time even when dealing with reasonable people.

Weak bait, fuck off. You know you are changing the definition of ghosting here. Fuck off.

>letting annoyance get to you
You keep making points that are perfectly, stupendously valid against you. Months? Bitch, Jow Forums has been this self-pitying permavictim for years. Of course we're annoyed.

Was this bait? Am I being baited?

Yes. Ghosting is okay for safety and to avoid abuse. Manipulators are emotionally abusive. That's not what's being discussed here.

R u guys retarded or wat

user is based as fuck and I'm glad he's part of my thread.

>The people here use ghosting as a first resort
How did you conclude that? In which scenarios? I genuinely don't recall it being suggested too often on here, and the only example I could think of was where incels spammed it to another insecure cuck.

Besides, surely it's worth addressing what causes it on the other side: People who can't take a fucking no.

"Breaking contact without further explicit notice." Under what definition are you operating?

>How did you conclude that? In which scenarios?

Remember that time someone posted a thread asking whether he should leave his wife because she was fatter and uglier than she'd been ten years before whenever they got married, and that one user said "Don't attempt to work things out with her. Don't let her know you're leaving until the day you hand her the divorce papers, and don't tell her the reason you're leaving. She doesn't deserve to know"? That fucker deserved to be punched right in the face, and he's a very stereotypical Jow Forums user.

>People who can't take a fucking no get ghosted
>ghosting is "Breaking contact without further explicit notice"

How can you be this fucking retarded

In case you're too retarded to get it. If you break up, they say no, and then you ghost, that's not exactly "Breaking contact without further explicit notice" is it? It's still shit, but it's not what is being discussed.

To be fair, the wife would be a big winner in that scenario if the husband is the kind of person to unrionically ask the shit here.

It's likely that one of us is. Still not quite sure who. Care to elaborate?

>breaking contact =/= breaking up
Guess you was the retard after all. Feels good.

Okay, I'm going to take a nap to try to fight this cold off. Thanks to my anti-ghosting friend. Keep on fighting in the name of compassion and human decency.

Feel better OP lol. I'm also bailing out of this cringe thread.

I agree OP. As someone who's had issues with ghosting before (me ghosting other people) it's rough to see people supporting it instead of being mature and talking things out.
In all honesty, a lot of this board just supports immature and irrational responses. It's annoying enough that the topics on this board are nearly all men with girl or sex problems.
"omg my gf hasn't had sex with me in 2 minutes im gonna go cheat"
"how do i talk to a girl"

Its Jow Forums, its full of social cripples and sociopaths.