>gf 2 years >love her more than any love ive felt before >dumps me so we can focus on our careers/her school >2 months later (now) get job offer away from her >better pay, maybe better path to my dream job, maybe worse path (any software engineers able to advise me here?)
>blocked her on every social media except linkedin in case we want professional relationship one day >she views my profile a couple times within the week recently (thinking about blocking her because im trying to stop thinking about her, this is reminding me of her)
>25 m Even now I still think her and I belong together. I know I need to do what's best for me now. We're not even together anymore and this shouldn't even be a thought. I just got the email a couple hours ago and at first I was happy, but then I was sad. I'd be more than happy to search for better jobs that aren't away from her if I could be with her. Perhaps it would be better for my dream job anyways.
I don't really know what advice I'm looking for here. I think I'd like to hear what people have to say about it though. My feelings about this are very awkward.
>Move on I've been trying to, applying to jobs and trying to change my life for the better since she broke up with me. But thanks, I feel a bit better about it now that I hear your thoughts
Jose Miller
Her viewing it doesnt mean much since you need.to get on with your fucking life. Talk to her to get some closure so ypu can move the fuck on
Henry Sanchez
>closure With what? She already told me we probably won't be together ever again. We had a moment of closure already. Fuck I just feel so shitty about it.
William Adams
simple solution requires simple answer.
u still falling for her? go and ask her and append the situation.
if she's not for you. plenty of fish out there. If you keep your loser attitude, always my ex attitude, no girls want that crap
if u no dating skills. go out and keep trying and learn from each failure.
why worry with one fukin rejection? you make your own life, b your own king. if u think u r shit, then so be it. b creative, innovate, b mysterious, cheeky, funny.. not moaning about past..
Carson Gonzalez
I am falling for her bad.
The problem is that she is extremely dedicated to and stressed from school. Breaking up was supposedly very difficult for her, and she didn't want to do it, but she thinks it was best for her to develop. After she broke up with me, we agreed to stopped talking for a month when she contacted me to make it official.
I don't know if she was telling the truth but in this situation it's best to let her develop on her own, right?
I have dating skills, I'm worried about ending up with the right girl.
Cooper Nguyen
if she don't want you can't force it. move on to new chapter of life.
no stress. why stress yourself?
Colton Gonzalez
take the offer, she put her career first once, she will do it again, there is nothing for you to gain from her, relationship-wise
Carson Baker
Dude she is probably already fucking another guy. "I am busy" = you are not worth my time. I don't even want to be mean but it is so ridiculously easy for girls to get someone else. Don't get in contact with her, learn what oneitis means and do something against it. Do more sports, get a good job. Fuck a few stacies. There are millions of guys who have/had the same problems you have. Get over yourself and forget her!
She left you high and dry and she has the fucking nerve to say "oh we'll PROBABLY never be together". OP if that shit doesn't rub you the wrong way you're still looking at this situation the wrong way. She's leaving that touch of hope there just in case. You're plan b now. You don't deserve that, you see that right? Put yourself first. She did it, you can too.
The reason she told me was not because she didn't want a relationship with me, but also told me that we will probably never have a relationship again. It came on a split decision supposedly for an investment in her professional career.
Nathaniel Perry
Yes, I know she probably is, but I don't know. I know how easy it is for girls to get someone else. She's also Japanese in tech. I don't know if fucking girls is the right answer for me. I've fucked enough to make me happy. I was ready for marriage and children. I've had enough girlfriends. That being said, I've started going to the gym (got sick last weekend, gonna go back again Wednesday), applied to new jobs, learned more in my field, taking steps learning a new language (can you guess which one?) and more. I'm doing everything I can. Except maybe fucking girls. I don't know man I'd feel so soulless doing that at this point in my life. I'd feel even more like a low life loser.
Chase Kelly
That's been rubbing me the wrong way since the moment she said it, and it has been driving me nuts. Thank you so much for pointing that out. >You're plan b now. You don't deserve that You're absolutely right. I should put myself first. Just to be clear, I'll be improving myself, but should the decision come to this job opportunity and her, I'd choose her in a heartbeat. However, that won't come. I'm making this decision for the bettering of myself, regardless of what I want.
I am at the same time though, worried I'll never find a better match than her. I mean she checked everything. I've never seen myself more naturally myself than I was with her. I didn't care about anything else in the world.
Ian Smith
Same guy as before 2 years ago my fiance broke up with me. We were together for 8~9 years. I felt the same way, but you have to get over it and you cannot allow her to treat you like that. I know how soulless and empty it can feel, but that is just a natural reaction to being left. You need to push on, don't think about it and just move on. You should still try to date, just because.
(I guess you learn Japanese. I also improved my Japanese after the breakup)
I know where you are at and it gets better. Just move on. Good luck user (Man your reply hit too close to home...)
Xavier Perry
Wow, that must have been very difficult. I cannot even imagine what that must have been like. >You should still try to date Here's the thing. I'll tell you about the last 3 times I've been with girls. I dated a girl for 2 months, and I broke up with her. It was difficult and the first time I've actually done the breaking up. Met another girl weeks after and dated for 8 months, and she broke up with me. We had some pretty serious plans and it was difficult for me. Waited maybe a month and dated to get over it, and I met the girl that just broke up with me recently.
In the last 3 or so years I have been single for very short amount of time, and I've been with 3 girls in attempting a serious relationship, and I feel weird about that. I read the more sexual partners someone has had, has a statistical relationship with how unhappy they are in marriage. Another girl I've had a crush on before seemed to be put off with the girls I've seen, and I was ashamed of that. I'm worried about what's going to happen with me if I don't make the correct choice soon.
I think I deserve better than how she treated me with this breakup. I'll try to move on, and thank you for your advice. Sorry if I struck a cord.
Elijah Miller
>I'm worried about what's going to happen with me if I don't make the correct choice soon. There is no correct choice. Maybe you can get with someone, maybe you can't. Just try to be able to be alone. I think it's best to not worry too much about wether you you will find a live long partner or not. You can't do more than try and you already do that! I met a really cool guy who was 45. He was divorce and wanted to marry again and have kids. He was cool and seemed to be okay either way. Meeting him helped me. There is no correct choice and you don't need to do anything soon. Relax, it will turn out okay eventually! Just don't give up. Don't worry too much, just try to exist and not be miserable. You seem like a chill guy, I am sure things will turn out fine!
Kevin Smith
Thank you. I've lived with no meaningful friends, or at a lot of times no friends at all, and I've just found that everything I do stops being fun after a while. Maybe it will get fun again somehow though.
I guess since I've slept I worry less, though not to say I'm not worrying at all. I'm just still in shock about what happened with us. I can't believe she did that.
Isaiah Peterson
From experience, I would take the job and rebuild a new life for myself. It will help you to get over her once you're not in the same place where you imagined your future with her would be.
Christian Kelly
I think you're right. That makes sense. Thank you for saying that.
Charles Cox
Np bruh. Also grats on the job offer, I hope the better pay and new environment brings you good times ahead
Aiden Evans
> A better match Why must humans qualify everything for a medal? Instead of finding someone in the vein of people who dump you to probably never be in a relationship again (he repeated with great disdain), find someone different. Explore something new in life. Don't just spend the time repeating the same shit.
I know what you mean, but she fit exactly what I wanted. If I look for someone different I don't even know what I'll be looking for because it's not what I wanted.
When the time comes I'll date and see what a relationship with them might be like, and I'll be open to that, but will it be the kind of relationship I want? Very unlikely.
I've explored a lot in my life already and I'm getting an idea of what I want my life to look like.
