Date advice for an incel

>Be me
>Kissless virgin at 25
>Out of he blue an old high school friend who used to have a crush on me contacts me
>Wants to go on a movie date to see Infinity Wars
>Eventually watch it with her
>Kind of awkward, don't get past hugging her before and after movie
>Ghost her like a beta for a few months
>She contacts me again to watch Endgame

I want to make this work, she is actually pretty cute and probably my best shot at finally getting laid, or at least kissing a girl, in the foreseeable future. How do I not fuck this up? She seems really interested and yet I have no idea how to proceed.

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Don't ghost her this time

Going to the movies sucks for a date. You aren't doing anything or getting to know each other at all. Suggest doing something else.

Well that's the plan but I don't know what to do during the date though. I figure I have to break the touch barrier but not really sure how. I would think moving in for the kiss might be too fast but then again at our age plenty of people fuck on the first date.

I think you have a point, it didn't go so well last time but what are some good alternatives?

I had an idea of taking her to a classical music concert since she grew up with an interest in music(took AP Music Theory and has a music related tattoo) and there are some free ones in the area(though I don't want to seem cheap). But also because, despite being a music pleb, I really did enjoy the two or three ties I attended concerts back in Uni for Music Appreciation.

I kind of want to do the movie date since we've already planned it and its only two days out from now but I will keep that in mind and suggest something else afterwards.

Are you sure she considers it a "date"?
You have to establish romantic interest somehow asap

I guess I am not 100% sure but even for someone like me it seems obvious. Why would she contact me out of the blue after years of not talking? And when we did connect with me through a group chat with her and a mutual friend from high school she would bring up sex in a joking way.

I don't want to be a dick but I think she is desperate and decided to try and hook up with me . She is a single mom and I guess has some features some guys wouldn't like(big hands, gap tooth, being black). I mean I am desperate too, probably more so really.

A movie is actually the worst choice for a get-to-know-you date. Sitting next to each other staring at a screen, you might as well be alone.

Counter with an invitation to dinner, a picnic, a walk in the park, or something that will give you the chance to talk. Don't worry about silence - start with catching up on the years since high school and go from there.

Well as I said earlier I kind of want to stick to the date because I am bad at this kind of thing and have already committed. I know, not the best reasoning but I feel comfortable with this(and also I just want to go to the movies anyway). But I do get your point and I intend to suggest a follow up date that isn't a movie.

Would an arcade work? There's a local one my friends and I like to go to and I see couples there all the time. She is not necessarily a gamer type but I would be surprised if she would be turned off by that kind of thing.

A movie is actually perfect choice for a date for people like OP.
It's hard to just go for a walk in the park and simply talk.
There's nothing to talk about.
Go for a movie, after that, go for a meal or drink a coffee at starbuck and you can start talking about the movie, and start talking about related stuffs.
It's a great conversation opener.

That was my thinking but I see his point, it didn't work that well last time. Not going to blame the movie entirely, certainly I dropped the ball, but what he says kind of played out to an extent.

If you've been ghosting her, that is the perfect excuse to catch up with her, depending on the time of the movie, go with her to a cafe before or after the movie.
You should ask her what she's been doing, even if you already know, how she's been doing, what is she into as of late, try to find common ground, give out neutral opinions you have on things. Depending on the chat time, you can either talk about what you thought of the movie, or what are you expecting from it, if you're negative about it try more "constructive" aproaches to it. And do get the conversation into how her love life is going, so you can get a chance to know if she is interested in you. "How's your love life going?"

I know this is pretty basic stuff but I don't think it harms to be reminded of it.
If you manage to get a nice conversation then chances are you might get something going.

Should I really openly ask about her love life? Seems kind of forward. I mean I am fairly confident she is interested in a romantic relationship but I guess it doesn't hurt to really confirm it.

Should I move in for a kiss on this second date? Seems like that wouldn't be that out of the ordinary but again, kissless virgin here so kind of a tall task for me but I don't think waiting on her to make the first move is a smart idea. I've waited my whole life for romance and it got me nowhere.

I mean, if you're talking about going for a kiss, then I don't think asking about her love life is so forward. Make sure about both yours and her feelings before going in for an empty kiss.

That is a good point. All I know about her love life is that her relationship with her baby daddy is not great but on the bright side he doesn't live in our town anymore last I heard. Actually I heard she was the one torpedoed their relationship after they had their kid together.

Gonna bump this thread with more context.

Both of us still live at home but only she has a car which isn't ideal.

>...my best shot at finally getting laid, or at least kissing a girl, in the foreseeable future. How do I not fuck this up?

if that as far as you can see things going, your problem isnt that you're 25 KV.

And if you talk to her like thats all thats in your head, being awkward will seem like the best outcome compared to what is more likely to happen.

just be aware your own mentality affects your potential way more than anything else.

I wish i could ghost people instead of being annoyingly clingy

Same, God I'm such a faggot
I wish I could genocide all non-faggot faggots so I could stop looking bad
Fuckers.

What exactly is wrong with that? Of course I'm not just going to use her as a cum dumpster but let's be real here, as a guy being a virgin, a kissless one no less, makes you garbage in the eyes of most of society. Its not even about getting my dick wet, its about reaching a milestone that most people expect you to reach by the time you graduate from high school so that it doesn't hang over my soul anymore. So that I can approach girls I am interested and not feel anxiety over my complete lack of intimate experience with the opposite sex.

For curiosity sake are you a girl? If so I don't blame you for not understanding this.

Why aren't you using what God taught you user? You should know that love is all about the events and empathy for the heroine's problems.

why is this board always fucking broken

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>For curiosity sake are you a girl? If so I don't blame you for not understanding this.

nope, dude. and dude who's seen many acquaintances with your outlook in common crash and burn and never understand why.

You're using the kind of language that reveals the mentality of someone who thinks if they just 'follow the formula correctly and not fuck it up' they end up happy and scoring.

also, the reason that it hangs over your soul tends to be a....well quite frankly a lame and not very well developed reason that shows signs of other personality deficiencies.

but make no mistake, user. I posted that for your benefit. so reflect a bit and first work on getting along with her regardless of grill, otherwise you're wasting your time.

You look pretty volcel to me

>Why aren't you using what God taught you user? You should know that love is all about the events and empathy for the heroine's problems.
True

>also, the reason that it hangs over your soul tends to be a....well quite frankly a lame and not very well developed reason that shows signs of other personality deficiencies.
Such as?

How so?

>How so?
You dont make any move

True but its mostly out of anxiety and self doubt(don't have a car, job, or place of my own).

>my best shot at finally getting laid, or at least kissing a girl
This way of thinking is very dangerous though. Making a girl your girlfriend out of desperation rather than actually wanting HER is not a great position to start a relationship from. Ideally you should date a chick because you like her and you're honestly interested in her. Not because you just want to get rid of your KV status.

That being said though, i can understand that if you're an incel you just want to jump on every half-decent opportunity presented to you.

Go get coffee or lunch. You can spend some time talking. Try and relax, just get to know each other a little. Think about what you want to know about her.

If it goes well go for a walk afterwards.

He doesn't know how.

Its a bit of both. There have been other girls who have shown interest in me but like a lot of incels I have a hard time settling and lowing my standards. But this girl is actually pretty cute and we have history together. Growing up there were a few girls who showed interest in me that I, for some reason, did not reciprocate and in hindsight its a huge regret. She is one of those girls so I think it would be pretty special to lose my virginity to her after all these years, almost like turning the page on this depressing chapter of my life.

So I am honestly interested in her though to be fair I don't see myself marrying her.

>though to be fair I don't see myself marrying her.
Well then congrats, you can’t actually see this shit being stable for long. Turn back now while you still can.

No way, I would rather love and lose then never love at all.

that’s just fucking sad why lead someone on if you don’t see a future. let her go don’t be a douche and hurt her when you know you don’t wanna be stable and serious ffs

I am not proud of it but at this point I'm thinking more about myself. And who knows, I could very well catch serious feelings and tie the knot.

Then date her for a bit and hook up with her. But i wouldn't go any further than that. Trust me when i say, pussy is not worth getting yourself into a relationship for if pussy is all you're looking for. You should only get into a relationship if you can see yourself being with her indefinitely. Given that this girl is no wifey material in your eyes, i'd suggest you keep this chick at arms length.

>that’s just fucking sad why lead someone on if you don’t see a future
Welcome to the modern dating game. 95% of 20th ce

....95% of 21th century dating is only about instant gratification rather than long term plans.*

I don't just want to date her for the pussy, I do want her to be my girlfriend for a time. I want to go on dates with her and introduce her to my friends and all that.

I just say that I don't see myself marrying her because she is a single mom. Marrying a single mom means raising another man's child and having that man in your life.

>Single mom
>I do want her to be my girlfriend for a time.
>For a time
OP listen to me. You're really setting yourself up for a trainwreck here solely because you want to lose your virginity and you want to acquire the experience of having been in a relationship. Believe me when i say, what you're looking to do is gonna end in disaster.

When you enter a committed relationship with this single mommy, she is gonna do everything within her power to try to keep you hooked to her and her children. Relationships aren't as easy as just ''we'll just have fun for a few months and then i break up with her''. You will develop feelings for her, you might even start to develop a bonding with her child(ren). Before you know it you're too far into this rabbit hole and you can no longer find the courage to break it off.

DO NOT enter into a real relationship with this woman. But you're gonna go ahead and do it anyways because it sounds like you've already made your mind up. God bless your soul.

Then you can’t have your cake and eat it too, because the whole point of dating someone is to see ignorance you’re compatible in the long term. You don’t date someone just to show them off for a little while. It sounds like you just want to show off the fact that you aren’t a permavirgin more than anything else. I guarantee you this women would be expecting something more long term than just being shown off. You need to be honest about this with her, it’s a straight up dealbreaker.

I can't deny you guys have a point but you are right that I am going to go ahead anyway, at the very least with the movie date.

Bump