How do I keep people from falling in love with me...

>I turned down this year has been a close friend of mine since kindergarten. He's confessed to me three times - once at 13, 17, and again this March - and I turned him down all three times.
this is literally hang yourself tier
It's truly a terrible world we live in that this could happen.

Become a prostitute. Then you can have carnal fun with all these men without involving love and get paid for it too.

Why should I hang myself, user?
I kept a close eye on him afterwards to make sure our friendship wasn't unhealthy for him, and discussed with him multiple times about whether he wanted to stay friends or not. He said yes, and at least on the outside seemed to move on.

>Why should I hang myself, user?
No, I meant him. This sort of thing is too much too much to live in spite of. If it was legal, that would be mercy kill material.
tell me, why couldn't you be with him?

Because I'm not in love with him, user. Same reason I've turned down all (save for one case where the feelings were requited) of the 50+ love confessions I've received since suddenly becoming popular with men when I was 16. His confessions don't make me happy. The idea of being his wife and being with him forever doesn't make me feel peaceful or happy. I love him as a close childhood friend, nothing more.
Why do you think his situation is too bad to live with, btw?

Why not get married? Then guys will mostly stop falling in love with you. Alternatively, get fat.

Ah, OP. You fell for the girls/guys friendship meme. It doesn‘t work. Ever. Just cut contact with any males that aren‘t your family. You can get all the socializing you could ever need from female friends. No need to play with other people‘s feelings. There will ALWAYS be a sexual component to „friendships“ between opposite genders. Be the mature one and don‘t fuel it. Just stop.

I don't like that idea...
I'm an extrovert through and through. I want to make friends with everyone.

How about get a bf?

Yeah, ok. Then keep basking in how your male friends make you feel desirable and completely ignore the fact that you can only keep doing that by playing with their feelings.

Once I find someone I want to be with... so far I've only fallen in love one time, and circumstances ended up separating us.

I don't play with their feelings, or at least not deliberately. I simply try to be the best friend to them that I can be, same as I do with girls.

Jesus fuck I hope this is bait and people like you actually don't exist.
What a massive cunt you are. Seek help. And I do mean now. For everyone's sake.

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>people like you don't exist
Like her? She's not guilty of anything, far as I'm aware, besides existing and apparently being hot and/or lovable. It's not a crime to turn something down you're not in love with

Why do people fall for you? Do you have a smashing body? Post your height, weight, bra size.

>not deliberately
I never implied you do this on purpose. This is most likely happening on levels you aren‘t aware of. That doesn‘t mean it‘s not happening. Just don‘t be friends with guys, alright? Even if you are 100% certain that this is strictly platonic and you‘re just being nice, there‘s a lot more going on subconsciously. Seriously, don‘t underestimate it.

Why do I need to seek help?

I wish I knew, user. I don't think I'm anything special. I just try to be the best friend that I can be, and apparently that's enough to win people over.

My body isn't bad. I'm thin and have fairly large breasts, though I generally wear loose clothing to avoid attention and because they're honestly more comfortable.

Yeah like that stops cunts from thinking they can steal OP from her bf. The second there is a minor problem in their relationship, the fucking vultures come in with tales of
>Oh he doesn't value you like how I do!
>We get on so much better than you and your bf do
>I'm a nice guy unlike him!

How many men have you had sex with?

I actually was told these very things by five or six different guys during my sole relationship. :/

Am I really the only one in here seeing through OPs lies?
You know this bitch is manipulative as hell. Presenting cruelty and cowardness as virtues shrouding it all in "being a good friend".
>Get a therapist
>Ask him why are you (maybe not deliberately) hurting people
>Find the underlying cause
It'll be a win for everyone. You'll stop fucking people up and as a bonus I bet you'll be able to finally get into a meaningful relationship.

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Only my ex. I'd feel gross if I slept around. No offense to anyone who does the casual sex thing.

How is she guilty of cruelty??

It's pathetic, they probably think they're so super nice but they're actually attacking a vulnerable relationship for their own desires, taking advantage of the woman's sad feels..

You must be joking, you need to see a therapist if you think all women should be at the mercy of any guy who asks them out.

Get a long distance "boyfriend" . As in not a real person, so people wont approach you. Or actually get a bf, so people wont approach you. Or we can discuss the common denominator here, you..

You probably act in a way that normal women in those mens lives dont act like that to them. Making them believe you are flirting. Did you consider that?

You're truly desperate to make this OP's fault, aren't you?

Gee dunno
>guy falls for her probably because she is trying to be as sweet and possible and is also probably hot
>rejects him
>puts the burden of deciding whether to see her again or not completely on him
>of course he agrees because blinded by feeling and shit
>she keep "monitoring" him essentially deciding what's good and what's not
Gee I dunno. That doesn't sound cruel at all.
You are projecting too hard roastie.

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>and is also probably hot
Oh such a crime against humanity, yeah it's so evil that OP is doing this by choice.

I am the user you replied to but not the user OP was talking to.

It is not her fault, but it is not the dudes fault either, it is judt happenstance and in order to fixit like she asks you need to understand it. It is about her.

It is like being burgled, it is never the fault of the person burgled from but you take action to reduce risk.

Yes. Hot AND kind is very desirable by almost all men.
Yes. The line between a "good female friend" and "outright flirting" is very thin.
Any other questions?

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Yeah but if OP is just really friendly then she shouldn't change that because people misunderstand, only immature people could believe that a woman being nice must mean there's something going on between them.

The only way this theory is justified is if her apparent friendliness does stray into flirtatiousness, but the only time I've seen that happen was with my ex after we broke up, she got someone kicked out of uni for sexual assault when he felt her up but she revealed to me that she was answering questions from him about whether she spits or swallows..

By the sounds of it, OP isn't anything close to personality to her. In which case, the only thing to "blame" here is that OP is probably pretty hot and that cannot be changed.

>The line between a "good female friend" and "outright flirting" is very thin.
Are you a virgin? Because they typically mistake common courtesy for flirtation.

This guy fucks

She might not be aware of a few actions where most women do them as flirtatious but she does because she is friendly. We can not know this from Jow Forums, since probably she isnt aware of it either.

Look i understand girls soemtimes just have to deal with this even by existing. But OP s situation seems excessive and a bit abnormal. If she wants to stop, she needs to analyse it proper.

Yup, I don't flirt. I hug, I talk about hobbies, I compliment, and I try my best to always be there for the other person, but I don't flirt or make come-ons.

I dunno, I know there's some truth to the "men and women can't be friends" thing, but that sounds so terribly sad. Since I was a child, I've always enjoyed making friends with everyone in my line of sight. I've had wonderful and enriching friendships with men (many of which caused neither of us any stress because they never developed feelings for me) that I wouldn't trade for anything.

I refuse to believe that people are falling in love with OP left and right because of "common courtesy". That's not possible even is she is literally a 10/10 goddess.
But do keep try to fit my into your little brackets roastie.

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Nah men and women can be friends, but sometimes men only befriend a women because they fancy them. Then suddenly all those normally harmless actions all become signs..

But this is a result of a man not being truthful in trying to be friends, I mean for sure I'd like to see all my female friends naked and I'm presuming this is why "men and women can't be friends" but it honestly hasn't ever become a problem for my friendships because I don't desire that more than I objectively prefer them as friends and I presume it's the case for most adult men as well.

If you're not in love with him, shouldn't the letter be a painful reminder of the time you hurt him, rather than something you read over and smile?

Okay yeah that is weird, kind of reminds me of the time I did get rejected by a friend of a friend, I was cool about it of course but she started asking me to list out what it was that I fancied about her and she was loving it.. Amazingly it didn't get that weird afterwards and we were still able to be in the same room without it being awkward.

Because she's a heartbreaking whore who enjoys seducing guys and stealing their hearts like the succubus she is under the guise of being a good friend.

Finally a voice of reason in this circlejerk of thots.

Would a heartbreaker post a picture of a girl as good as Monika?

Very good question, one that isn't being asked enough!

I get you OP. But i dont get love confessions, i think that i can't really love anything or anyone anymore. I fear that when i do, i would suffocate the person with my love, because im holding it all back. Im so bitter, that even when another person says that they like me, i feel bad.

Suffocate how exactly?

I am a dude and i feelexactly the same. I stop myself showing affection because i feel it pushes people away.

somehow like this
youtube.com/watch?v=ixw_bLVUL34

Just from reading this post I can tell that I have been in love with you for years and didn't even know it. This is excruciating. The way you post anime girls is making my heart pound vigourously. Please say you love me back? If not, I'll shoot up a bridge or jump off a school because the pain and frustration would be too much for a mere man to bear

Not sure, what you mean user. I genuinely dont

Try being a cunt, it's not nice but it would work, also that is some fine ass doki rite thar.

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Loving a person so much that you want to consume her/him. I dont know man. My love is serious, i can't get much flirty with women because i tend to see love as something absolute. I cant give you my love when i know its used like a cigarette.

This girl i (still somehow) love, loved me aswell but i still fucked it up because her loving me made me despise her. How can she love a broken fucked up person like me? How can i love her when she loves this stupid retard that i am? Why do i punish myself in the worst way?

I'm sorry for shitting this thread up..

Chill the fuck down and take a break

Relax

I’m not an incel woman hater by any means, but just know you’re not crazy user. Friend zone is Auschwitz and of this girl doesn’t realize she’s the head guard she’s delusional.

Only because you are actively suppressing the desire to fuck them. All relationships are based on a give and take dynamic. What can a healthy childbearing woman have to offer that trumps all your biological conditioning?

Bruh why?? I mean damn he actually loves you if he’s willing to wait 10 years

Her more attractive friend.

It sounds like you're sending out romantic or sexual energy, which is an invitation. Tune into your own energy, shut it down and see what happens.

naw dude. I agree with that poster, and I’ll tell you what they offer: the massive social and health advantages of an amazing friendship. you can’t survive, succeed, and reproduce without a great network.

nothing wrong with having attractive female friends who are also awesome people. but i have some sexual experience and an amazing gf. it’s difficult to prioritize the friendship if you’re a virgin desperate to touch a boob (tho it can be done)

this stuff gets easier as you get older in my experience

what was different about the 1 case where you liked the guy?

The answer's in the question user, fugging hell.

>not loving someone back who has fallen in love with you means that you hurt them
That's not how it works. Is this actually how entitled most people are when it comes to relationships?

>fedora.exe running on all cores

Gosh dang it. Why can't I just be smart, kind, honest, handsome, and ripped without someone trying to get a piece of me?

You don't love him.
YOU DONT LOVE HIM.
You are actively denying him his love, how could he not feel hurt, especially when you still care for him? It's torment.

This

mate you're mentally off in a bad way

This used to tear me up inside OP and now I just stop caring because I tried everything to stop it and nothing works. Nice or mean it doesn't matter but you do need to realize that not all the guys that confess their love really love you nor all those that seem devastated are.

A declaration of love some use as a tactic and so too acting like their life is now in ruin because you don't love them in return.

Those are the easy ones because its a game to them but a troubling majority confuse their possessiveness for love and are very dangerous.

This might help though. Do not refer to any as friends but as acquaintances and do not see any of them over 3 or 4 times and move on so all they are left with is a whiff of your perfume

>How can i love her when she loves this stupid retard that i am?

chances are she doesn't love you but mostly afraid that nobody else will love such an asshole like you

Become a camwhore. If you post your naked body a over the internet it will turn off some guys.

You are unconsciously seducing everyone to fill the void of your uncertain identity (hence everyone here thinking you're yoing).

Therapy may help you try to analyze why you are this way and how you're doing this to everyone.

Also a good fuck will release you and you'll be less like this.

My highschool oneitis was unironically this type of person.
Not much to do I'm afraid, try identifying in advance if someone's starting to develop orbiting tendencies, consider if there's anything you do that might feel to the other party like they're the only one to get it from you (my oneitis called me baka because we were weebs, and I was shocked, SHOCKED, when i heard her call someone else that, realizing it easn't a specila thing) and try to identify if it's a partixular type of person that is like that.

Think to yourself: are you doing anything that can be seen as leading these guys on?
femanon here and I've had many friends say that they're just friendly with everyone but be outright too touchy and flirty with guys. If this is you, STOP. You're probably doing it for the validation.
If this is not you and you act completely platonic toward these guys (sometimes its best to limit those friendships to basically no touching) then you've done nothing wrong. Chances are you are attractive and have a nice personality. If so, none of this is your fault. And any guy who gets so bent out of shape by you not liking them back is just immature. It sucks that you have to deal with it so much; but maybe look to surround yourself with more mature guys.
It's most likely not love either. Just obsession and lust.
As a girl, if you feel the guy trying to be too close/non-platonic with you (you can usually sense these things) just find ways of nonchalantly reminding him that you guys are friends. (If a guy tries to hit on you, completely ignore the flirting and respond really platonically).

This is what I think as well after like the 3rd guy you'd think she would control her self but she probably just keeps giving off that same energy and it's effecting the guys around her. She won listen though shell be thing your wrong and continue to be the way.

I 10000% agree with this user
Its kind of soul crushing when you like someone and they only like you back as a friend lol
But it prob gives GIRLS ego boosts knowing that guys like them, get turned down and are still willing to be friends its a control/ego thing i guess

>>not loving someone back who has fallen in love with you means that you hurt them

Uh... yes? It means you hurt their feelings. It doesn't mean she did anything wrong, but rejection does hurt. Why are you so obtuse?

Get fat
Also take a picture each day and when you're done send them all to me

What the hell do you do to be surrounded by so many pathetic orbiters? Are you the only woman in some STEM job?

therapist says otherwise

Put on Hijaab

>Why do you think his situation is too bad to live with, btw?
pure agony. It is very likely that any relationship you have to realize that whatever sadness you feel turning him down is infinitely worse being experienced by him. You could go out on a few dates with him. If you have been friends with him this long, surely his personality isn't terrible. I hope one day medical technology can remove this cancer from the human experience. Nobody will have to suffer like this just because they were born unattractive. At the very least you should stop being friends with him, it is for his own good. Only if he forgets you can he be happy with another girl who's more in his league.
But I wonder, is he so terrible looking that NO girl has been into him? would you reject him if he was your only option for getting married? Or do you just think you can do much better than him?

>my oneitis called me baka because we were weebs
>tfw you will never have a teenage weeb gf

Why throw away your decleration of love out so soon in the open when you don't know someone good enough to know if they love you too? Giving in to "Falling in love" is a choice. You can postpone it. Check the waters, and if you don't get the vibe he or she loves you back, you move on, or just accept you never loved her, you just wanted to, because you're lonely in the love game.

That's how healthy human brains should work.

I guess you must just be a really loveable person.

We don't know anything about the kinds of vibes she gives off, or whether the people who've confessed to her did so right away or waited a long time. The only anecdote we have is that one of her suitors is a friend from kindergarten who first asked her out when he was 13, so he waited seven or so years.

Just stay away from the opposite sex as good as you can, or at least keep your distance. Heck, last time happened just because I asked for the name of a song from his playlist.

*I asked for the name of a song from his playlist while kissing him and grinding on his dick, after which we engaged in pillow talk for an hour

Fixed that for you.

No, he's a receptionist at my gym. The people who work there pick the music so when I left and heard it on my way out I asked about the song. Apparently that's an invitation for more, judging by his (...and your) reaction.

Maybe you shouldn't have bobbed up and down on your feet while asking him that in order to make sure your breasts jiggled around as much as possible?

Not all of us have disorders, user. I don't suffer from seizures or whatever which would cause me to bob while standing.

Holy shit, I didn't realize people could be this sore over rejection.

Nigga there’s a reason why women get beaten and killed. Imagine playing on very easy and STILL getting blown the fuck out.