Ghosting

Related question: What should you do when you don't want to hang out with someone?

>when if ever is ghosting someone in any sort of relationship acceptable?

Never? Just be honest and tell someone you aren't interested anymore. It's really not that hard. I think most women (and men) are so damn afraid of confrontation. People respect honesty. BE DIRECT AND HONEST ALWAYS

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Currently in the process of being ghosted for my first time, after what I thought was a great day, and boy does it suck

early dating stages or abuse/violence.
i've been in both situations and I've ghosted a lot of first dates (but that's more of a fade) and I still talk to my abuser like a lot of domestic violence victims do.

Did you mean great date? If so the same shit happened to me, even hooked up with her and we both seemed to have a good time. Oh well, sometimes you can never tell what someone is actually thinking

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typical psycho westernized female response

>fuck men everythings about me

enjoy the cat life

Jesus fuckin Christ
Ghosting will always be worse than telling people the truth.
By ghosting you are betraying someone's trust, you invested in them, they invested in you, you have a social contract and if you want out you need to sign your letter of resignation so they have a chance to grow as a person.
You take away so much when you ghost. Closure, knowledge, the potential to selfreflection. It is asocial behavior, I understand why people do it but I absolutely do not understand people justifying it. Just be honest with yourself and admit that you're a shitty person who is afraid of confrontation.

I know this feel. I got ghosted out of nowhere by a girl I had been seeing for 3 months. It hurts.

After my first break up my ex tried to stay friends, and inevitably ended up telling me stuff I didnt need to hear about other guys. At that point, I knew she wasnt even worth an explanation and I ignored every text

>It is asocial behavior

in other words, fitting for this day and age

Never, quite the opposite. I cannot seem to get rid of a guy and tried everything including ghosting but they somehow think I'm giving them a test and want them to try and find me. Scary

Been ghosted so many times I can't even count. Ghosting is unacceptable and annoying as hell. Fucking piece of shit women can't even tell me they don't like me. It always happens when I think all went fine. But no, it's so hard for them to just say they didn't like the date.

just be real with them

playing games with guys only leads them down the elliot rodger path quicker

Cats are for brain dead retards who want toxoplasmosis.
I don't even masturbate. That's how little you walking sperm banks matter to me. Get a life.

Always get ghosteed after I hook up with a guy. I had a crazy sex drive back then and was craving dick 24/7. Now im on BC and Im never horny anymore.

>Now im on BC and Im never horny anymore.
God damn this. I wanted to suggest it to my gf but I've read too many times that women lose sex drive because of it.

I don't want to use condoms for fucks sake. I want to come inside her.

I've tried everything. Honesty, boy that doesn't work. Tried its me not you or you deserve someone better or I have a restraining order. Nothing works, well thats not entirely true, if I get another bf real quick that is bigger than the guy he leaves me alone.

Hey you can get the copper IUD, I love cream pies so that's what I got. Its got no hormones either if you make sure to get the copper one.

This. Make sure to get it at Planned Parenthood, a regular physician is usually hesitant to put an IUD in a woman who hasn't had children yet, which is dumb. I got my first one at 19 at Planned Parenthood after my doc refused, PP had no problem with it and I only paid $50 based on my income since I had no insurance

That's so fucking grim to hear, I live in the UK so I literally popped down to my local sexual health clinic and they shoved it in. They don't like putting it in women without children cus they're usually smaller therefore trickier, that's literally it.

I read about it too. This shit sounds kinda scary and I highly doubt she'll actually want to put a foreign body in her vag. It sounds like some sort of major fuckery is needed to get it done. And I'm kinda scared of making her infertile because I really want to have children. Just not right now.

If they are extremely abusive and you fear for your safety or if they aren't mentally sound enough to understand a breakup.

I'd also argue if they cheated you can choose to just leave, if not going to take revenge on them somehow.

...a foreign body in her bag? You mean a penis or a vibrator don't count? There's no major fuckery, it goes like this
>Lie down on table, pants off
>Piece of equipment holds you open
>Piece of equipment grabs your cervix to keep it still
>IUD gets shoved in
>Rest
Its a deeply uncomfortable experience, but the copper one definitely has no effect on long term fertility and honestly it's the only non-hormonal birth control for women that isn't condoms. It's your life tho user.

Even when a guy shoots people up it's still womens' fault. Ah society never fails to surprise me with its misogyny.

Well a foreign body that's there at all times and it's well "up there".

Does it hurt in any way? Any cramps or whatever? What about periods?

Its kind of the same process if a women ever gets a miscarriage, a lot of times not all the tissue comes out which can cause sepsis. They dilate the cervix open and scrape the remains out. It doesnt affect fertility.

>They dilate the cervix open and scrape the remains out. It doesnt affect fertility.
Shit I guess there's no way I'm gonna convince her to do THAT.

Ah well...

The copper IUD literally has no hormones, the pill fucks women up WAY more and can cause extreme mood swings, loss of libido, increased risk of blood clots, dry vagina, severe acne etc. And you must be very consistent about taking the pill everyday. Nuvarings made my insane and it kept falling out, the injection can cause major weight gain, the IUD you dont have to worry about it, its really the best option, every other birth control comes with bad side effects.

For me I felt 3 sharp pains and it was over. They offered me anesthesia but I refused. The cervix dilates after a women gives birth, it always goes back to the original size.

I'd say it was deeply uncomfortable verging on pain to get put in, so I'm not looking forward to having it replaced but at least that's every 5 years for me. No cramps at all, doesn't affect my periods although if you're used to hormonal birth control they can feel heavier because they're normal. Sometimes I get paranoid about it but I've had 0 issues so far.

Also the scraping thing was about after misscarriage, nothing about IUD. My point was that her cervix will be dialted if she ever has children or a misscarriage, its unavoidable and natural.

I know. She hasn't given birth yet and she told me she's quite scared of it and how it'll likely rip apart her vagina.

How about removal? Is it difficult and painful?

Yeah, giving birth can ruin the vagina. Thats just being a women. Its like pooping a watermelon. But simple dilating the vagina to put an IUD wont "rip apart" the vagina. Giving birth is a million times more painful than getting an IUD put in.

I have yet to have it replaced / removed, sorry bud

I personally find ghosting to be immature and unacceptable in any sort of relationship. I think everyone should have the balls to tell someone they're through with the relationship rather than just leaving them in the dark indefinitely.

I personally have not been ghosted before and I would never ghost someone, but I've only used Tinder for hookups and otherwise have not fiddled with online dating.

>have you been ghosted?
Yes.
>How did it make you feel?
First time it happened, I almost started crying and choked up quite bad. The other times hurt too, but now I realize it's just what bitches do because men are disposable and women aren't capable of love.
>Do you think you've ever been justified in ghosting someone?
Not really, but I ghosted my first gf after 5 months and the bitch blew up my phone with calls and texts, lmao.

>it's just what bitches do because men are disposable and women aren't capable of love.
They do it because they can. They have multiple men at the same time, so they just don't get attached to either of them and they don't have time to respond to every single one. And they never face any sort of consequences of their behavior.

>Not really, but I ghosted my first gf after 5 months and the bitch blew up my phone with calls and texts, lmao.
It's because not getting any sort of an explanation makes your brain go haywire. People themselves are their worst enemies. This is why silence is the best weapon against someone. Not saying shit about someone. But not saying anything at all.

t. autistic cunt

>men are disposable and women aren't capable of love
>I ghosted my first gf after 5 months and the bitch blew up my phone with calls and texts, lmao.

Ah the quality of men~ They aren't even aware of it which is the funny part.

I never ghosted someone but I was ghosted plenty of times. It wasn't that bad towards the end, I got used to it. But I gave up dating for now, as it completely destroys my ego and makes me feel unimportant.

Same here. The potential benefits just aren't even worth it anymore.

Kill yourself.

Yeah, been ghosted a few times myself. Just fucking hate it. Why can't you just reply to me? A simple no is fine. If you took the time to have a long conversation with me, or hang out with me, or whatever the fuck it may be, you know I'm not a complete creep that's going to go nuts if you say no.

I hate being left in the wind to try to figure out what the fuck went wrong. Because I don't know how to fix anything, so I just have to wildly guess.

Nice argument

in most cases, ghosting shouldnt be done, it leaves the other person waiting for something.
Also, some people have a tendency to do it more than others, and they dont solve their problems by talking because they think its ok to ghost people

Wow look at this brainlet femanon who thinks that toxoplasmosis actually makes people mind controlled by cats when there is not a single valid scientific article stating this. Toxoplasmosis is nothing more than an extremely rare medical condition someone can get from cats.

Well a lot of people (on this board for instance) call it "ghosting" when they just write a random person or a tinder match and they don't reply.

Not really, are you retarded or just a female?

Avoidance is a shit social strategy at the best of times.
and it sure as hell indicates serious lack of manners.

>toxofag
When will you retards ever learn? I'll still be here tending to my fish and aquatic plants while you'll end up TOXO'd and one-eyed.
Oh, and by the way: Cats aren't sexy. I don't like dogs either but women are much more attracted to men who can handle dogs than losers who are so dumb they actually settle on raising their cats.

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As someone who ghosts pretty much everyone at some point, I’d say that it is never acceptable. I want to keep in contact with my family, friends, etc, but sometimes I’m too neurotic to socialize. It’s not uncommon for me to text someone back after a week or more.

If you are a good looking desirable man, ghosting a woman is always 100% acceptable. No matter how long you've talked or how many times you've met. They ghost lesser males hundreds of times per year, and deserve it. Its simply justice

Well you see, women are a special class of citizen always treated better than men, gets preferential treatments in the job market and is obviously more valuable in the dating market.
If you are a pretty girl, you will never feel any negative emotions coming your way, so why should they be able to handle conflicts?
Ghosting just means they can avoid to deal with certain people, simply turning off a person they don't want to deal with.
They clearly think they are better than you and thus don't owe you any excuse.

>who giv a fuck about the moral implecations

This is what is wrong with people today...
Treat others how you woulf want to be treated, enjoy growing old and realizing nobody loves you.

i realised at a young age nobody loves me, checkmate.

Ghosting is always rude. Just be honest about your intentions. If they freak out it's not your problem unless you were a severe asshole or they are insane, which is not common.

What came first, the chicken or the egg?
You can break that cycle.

I think that just encourages girls to ghost. Do onto others as you would have others do on to you man.

yeah i tried that for like 15 years. i wish it were true, but in my experience being kind and stuff just makes people take advantage of you

>when if ever is ghosting someone in any sort of relationship acceptable?
Early on is fine.
>reasons why you've ghosted someone?
Because they've turned out to be creeps.
>have you been ghosted?
Not quite. Contact just evaporated to no response within 5 days so I quit responding, too. Guy just didn't want to tell me off (and he never messaged me again after).
>How did it make you feel?
I felt no different.
>Do you think you've ever been justified in ghosting someone?
I'm not putting up with bad-behaved freaks. Why waste precious time? It's as pointless as feeding internet trolls or the like.

To emphasize, quotes from a little article, "I swiped left on Tinder so he found me on LinkedIn. Why can't some men take no for an answer?";

>Last week I got a message on LinkedIn from a man I’ve never met. This was weird enough to begin with – like most millennials, I go on LinkedIn approximately never – but he wasn’t reaching out with an exciting new job opportunity. Instead, he’d written to proposition me. This man had seen me on Tinder and, (correctly) suspecting we wouldn’t match, had found my last name, sought out my profile on a professional networking website and used it to try to pick me up.

>I posted a screenshot of the message on Twitter and was met with an avalanche of sympathetic replies. Women around the world told me their horror stories, detailing the times men they’d already rejected on dating apps somehow found their Facebook or Instagram accounts and asked them out. One told me about a woman who’d received a phone call at her office from a hopeful suitor, who had apparently Googled her work contact number. Later that day a friend of mine was frightened and frustrated when she got home to find a stranger had printed a shirtless photo of himself and slid it under her front door, in some sort of profoundly misguided attempt at getting her attention.

Umm hello?? I treat people I actually like the way I want to be treated, not beta princess worshipping walking cocks. You know, like the friends who hang out with me on weekends at the digibar not the dumb perv who thinks he'll get sex out of me if he pays for my dinner.
Maybe if some of you morons would actually date in your league, you'd all be much happier.

Ghosting is a passive aggressive way to deal with your problems. Perfect for these fake millenials who are too scared to communicate or be vulnerble.

That is entirely inconsistent from what you said before.
Difference between being nice and being a chump.

Yeah, hung out at a club, she texted the next day which I thought was a good sign. we hung out she was all over me and I spent the night, but then nothing. All the vibes she was giving off didn't feel like it was going to be a one night stand

>when if ever is ghosting someone in any sort of relationship acceptable
when the other person continually will not accept no, the relationship is so new you're not established in each other's lives, if the other person will not understand your need to leave the relationship

>reasons why you've ghosted someone
Once for a stalker, second for a relationship where my needs were consistently not met. Various people who were not important in my life

>have you been ghosted
yes, fwb got a gf

>how did it make you feel
would've appreciated a simple 'i'm seeing someone'

>do you think you've ever been justified in ghosting someone
yes, both times. about to ghost #2 for the second time

so what's the nice way of saying you're a piece of shit and i'm done with you?

I would be okay with it if the girls who ghosted me turned out to be schizo psycho-retards like you

Sadly you're just an exceptional case

Seek therapy, your question is quite literally a sign of autism. I am not joking.

If your first or second date was somehow THAT fucking bad that you feel the need to say "you're a piece of shit" I'm sure you could elaborate and at least give them a chance to self reflect before ghosting. E.g. "This isn't going to work because you were an asshole to the waitress and spilled coffee on her, bye" or something

I'm not schizophrenic. You are.

Settle down there, pal. Not everyone is as enlightened as you and some relationships are not healthy to be in.

THIS

This assumes the person being ghosted is worthy of such consideration. If they never provided consideration for the ghoster to begin with, then they don’t deserve or are entitled to such.

That isnt most ghosting cases and it often helps to be the bigger person and be considerate to dicks.

>when if ever is ghosting someone in any sort of relationship acceptable?
I'd say when they're being pushy after you said you didn't want to spend time with them, or if the person's really creepy.

>Have you been ghosted?
I don't think so.

>Do you think you've ever been justified in ghosting someone?
Yes, I've ghosted a few people. One was an old friend that became incredibly toxic. Wouldn't take no for an answer whenever I'd say I didn't want to hang out with them, always caused drama when we would hang out, just nonstop problems, but I kept hanging out cause I guess I felt like I was supposed to after knowing him for 10+ years. After a while though, when I started going out on my own and realized how much more fun I was having, I kept telling him I want to do things on my own and he'd basically stalk me and ask people where I'm at so he can just show up and do the same stupid shit of trying to fight others/me/whatever. Cut off ties with him completely.

Honestly the others have just been flings, usually me saying I don't want anything serious and they keep trying to make it serious and telling people we're together anyways. Shit's weird. Social media is also weird and when some people really like you, they will literally show up at the places you've posted from just to get a chance to talk to you. My location is never on, I usually avoid posting the name of the place I'm at, and yet they still happen to find the same restaurants/stores/wherever I like to go to.

I remember when before it was called ghosting. I use to get bent out if shape when someone would stop responding. People would tell me how it's stupid to get upset. "They dont want to talk to you, they're just not interested" Grow a dick. Now I hear people call it ghosting and if you do it to someone your bad and it hurts peoples feelings. Grow a dick. No one owes you a response. If a bitch don't want to talk to you move or if you donr want to talk to her just drop her. There's over a billion people on this planet we are all expendable.

>be considerate to dicks
That’s your choice. Not mine.

I'm talking about ghosting after a date here, as it looks like most people in this thread are.

That being said ghosting someone as a way to break up with them is even worse.

>People were assholes to me so I'm going to become misanthropist and use this to justify my self being an asshole to others

Ah, I remember when I was an edgy 14-year old ...

I'm not saying be an ass hole. I'm saying no one person is worth getting attached to. None of us are special.

You're right about that, but that isn't really an excuse to ghost other people when it causes them distress. Be the better person

>HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GHOSTED?
>Millennial daters
>daters
>ghosted
good job social """""""scientists""""""" your incompetence can infallibly be relied upon to misunderstand emergent niche phenomena and reinforce their broad misapplication. fuck sake if these faggots are gonna lump being rude and having shit manners in with ghosting they could at the very least draw some sort of distinction

How many of you who said ghosting is perfectly fine think it's also fine if you have been bf/gf for a long time and he/she ghosts you without warning out of nowhere?

But why is it so distressing and why the change in attitude towards this behavior? That's what I dont understand.

It's been explained in this thread thoroughly if you took the time to read it.

First of all, it's basic decency and manners (in most Western cultures) to say goodbye at the end of an interaction with someone, but since that's a social construct i'm not going to argue it any further and you can take it or leave it.

The important thing when it comes to dating though, is that it leaves you with uncertainty, which people hate, e.g. "Did I do something wrong, or did she just move to Cambodia and forget to tell me?" And if it does turn out they lost interest because of something you did or said, it makes it hard to improve yourself if you don't what you did wrong. Also you are kind of wasting someone's time and being dishonest, if you're texting them without any real interest or wanting it to go anywhere.

how hard do her hormones typically fuck with her? like is it difficult for her to keep her emotions in check, maintain composure, keep a steady mood, etc? is she significantly affected by her menstrual cycle? does she get pms? the horror stories seem more prevalent than they are because "i got on birth control and it served its intended purpose satisfactorily without unwanted side effects" isn't remarkable enough to compel loads of people to wanna share their experience with it.

you're super bored rn aren't ya

It'd be still perfectly fine, it's their life and their choices to make. And the "harm" from ghosting is all up to you.

Now obviously it'd be a disappointing choice but if my gf thinks that ghosting is a way to end a relationship, it's up to me not seeing her attitude coming.

Basically everything you do can cause distress. Ending a relationship in a non childish way is pretty distressing too.

Distress is inevitable, what matters is treating people how you would like to be treated.
If someome stopped loving me i wouldnt want them to stay with me, but i also would like some fucking notice.

Being a dick to a dick just means you are also a dick. It will also justify to them why they should have been a dick.

>First of all, it's basic decency and manners (in most Western cultures) to say goodbye at the end of an interaction with someone, but since that's a social construct i'm not going to argue it any further and you can take it or leave it.

The thing though is that ghosting is so common that its the new normal. Pre 2010 if I went to someone bitching how a girl cut contact with me they'd tell me to suck it up.