Was I the asshole to break up with her?

Am I in the wrong for breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years who seems oblivious to my feelings regarding her sexual past? Whenever we talked about sex or doing something sexual, she would bring up stuff she did in the past with old boyfriends. It hurt, moreso because I loved her a lot and also because she was my first everything. The feelings that were stirred up inside of me when she mentioned her past were tearing me apart mentally and emotionally. I didn't want to lose her, but I couldn't be with her knowing what I knew.

Am I the asshole?

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Na you’re not wrong, she didn’t respect you and at least oh had enough self respect to walk away. Good man

Did you ever in those 3 years tell her that you did not like hearing about her previous boyfriends and ask her not to do it?

If yes and she did it anyways then no you are not an asshole. If you did not tell her then you are an asshole who needs to work on his communication skills for his next relationship.

Unless you actually told her how you didn’t want to know about her past, how was she to know?

Were you an asshole to break up because of this? No, a healthy relationship is formed when both partners are happy.

In case you’re wondering is sexual past a valid reason to end a relationship? It entirely depends on your own moral compass. Some may say you’re an asshole, some may agree with your point.

Listen to what rings true to you...prepare yourself, some anons may give you shit for this.

No. But how the fuck did it take 3 years to deal with it?

just ditch the bitch already

No. If you felt that way about it then that's that. If you didn't want to be with her anymore then you probably made the right decision. I do think you are weak though and unable to lead/be the man that you should be. You should have more confidence so that that type of thing doesn't bother you. Sounds like she may have been shit testing you to see how you'd react, or maybe she was trying to explore what you may like.

you done the right thing man

No, you are not an asshole. You might be insecure though, and this could damage future relationships. If a deficit in your own sexual experience is going to become an issue down the line, use this period to have sex with more women, or make sure you're matched up with your next girlfriend.

>Am I the asshole?
no

it can be explained as "retrospective jealous", some sort of mental ilness, google it
I had, or still have, this issue with my ex
now it bothers me alot when I go out with some girls

>How was she to know?

Because EVERY NORMAL HEALTHY GUY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD doesn't want to share his girl with other men. There is a reason that virginity is highly prized across all demographics in all cultures in all time periods. There is a reason that seeing or imagining their girl with another guy in a sexual scenario evokes a strong visceral instinctual feeling of disgust. It is literally the worst thing a woman could do that a man is serious about committing to.

You did the right thing OP. Not only did she already give away the only thing of value she could bring to the relationship, but she nonchalantly talked about it in front of you with no shame as if you should be okay being made a cuckold of. 8,000% disrespectful. Get a woman who actually looks up to you.

not the OP but personally it wouldnt matter how much sex I had, I would still be disturbed knowing my girlfriend/wife was defiled by other men.

You are an asshole but a bigger idiot. An idiot for wasting 3 years and bitching about something totally within your control. You don't like it then you leave it.

>sexual past a valid reason to end a relationship?
Wrong. Sexual past is a valid reason to never enter into a relationship. You should make the decision up front.

not if she kept bringing up her exes.

>his girl
Men kill me. They believe they own me even when they don't know me.

big this

I have a feeling OP is a cuck and couldn't even bring himself to say he didn't like her saying that shit. Such a huge cuck that his gf probably thought he enjoyed her verbal cuckolding. OP is a little bitch.

Some dudes aren't insecure enough to care that their girlfriend has had sexual experiences in the past.

>knowing my girlfriend/wife was defiled by other men.
she was gagging for it.

The problem with all men is they defile so they know other men defile. Rare is the man that makes love.

Well....did you tell her how you felt?
Relationships are nothing without communication, talk about anything that bothers you
But she was a big asshole tho, who the fuck would do that?

>777
Thelemic Trips of Lies

As a girl, she's retarded as fuck and has no self awareness. I would never bring up my sexual past to a partner unless my partner was very curious and kept probing me.

I think she was stupid but she'll learn. Both my ex bf's still believe I was a virgin. Its not hard if you keep your mouth shut. Problem is, some of them get all upset if they know you kissed a guy before and enjoyed it. I've been called a slut for that.

you make it sound like all women are victims or something, and we know that that is most certainly not the case. manipulative logic. typical of "BPD beauties" - like yourself.

>Its not hard if you keep your mouth shut.
it's not hard if you keep your legs shut.
FTFY

Not your place to say what I can do with my legs but just so you know. I'm not the only one that keeps her mouth shut and her legs open.

you like being gagged, don't you? pity you couldn't shut up on here too.
but to return to the topic, it's not your place to say what someone can expect or even demand of a partner, after all, it's their life they're sharing.
but at least you're discrete, for a slag, unlike OPs bint. thank heaven for small mercies.

Lol same, my current bf thinks he's my first

good catch!

You are free to want what you want but you are not free to demand I act in a way to please you. You can reject anyone for any reason and I can open my legs for any man for any reason. It doesn't bother me in the least you don't want me, there are plenty that do, but just in case I did. I could have you believe whatever I wanted you to believe by simply playing naive. Your ego would then make me a virgin princess simply because I was interested in you.

Its not hard to do. To be clear though. I'm not doing it to hurt them in anyway but to make it easier on them and me. What they don't know cannot hurt them.

>You are free to want what you want but you are not free to demand I act in a way to please you.
you are wilfully misreading my point: once you have done the deed, it's over, there is going back, whether you tell your new beau or not is a matter between you both, and one that affects the trust and integrity of the relationship. That said, shacking up with someone who has different values in that regard is not a recipe for long-term stability or happiness. But perhaps women are more cynical in that respect.
My point is not that a man can control a woman's behaviour, but that a man (or anyone, for that matter) can have certain standards in a partner. Call it preference, if it makes you feel any better.

Are you the self appointed god of relationships or just god? You sound like it and furthermore you aren't advocating a preference but an edict and a punishment to go with no different than a cult leader.

now you're just being ridiculous:
in the first instance, I have explicitly said that it was between 2 people - not 3 (unless that's your thing). In the second, I stated a person has a right to a preference, no?
I think if you actually bother to read properly you'll find you agree. Wouldn't you rather find a partner who doesn't judge you and who has similar values?
No need to be god or a cult leader to know that lying and dissimulation do not make for a good relationship. But it's your life. Be well.

>Am I the asshole?

Honestly, like, kind of.

If it has been 3 years since her last sexual experience with anyone but you, then it's obvious that you have a mental block about drawing the line between past and present.

I mean, other dicks aren't actually poisonous, and the effect of one can be completely removed with a simple shower.

However, if she was taunting you with it, then she was being unnecessarily cruel with the information, and the degree to which she would say things just to upset you is inversely proportional to the amount of an asshole you are.

If she was just using past examples to describe what she enjoys, though, then you are proportionally an asshole for being unable to cope with her autonomy as a sexual being.