ITT: Ask the Opposite Gender Anything

Answer this

It's definitely remarkable but the two most likely reasons to me;
>past boyfriends found her clingy, or she feels she scared people off in the past with coming on too strongly
>she is really bad at texting and afraid she cannot sustain your dynamic/the attraction over text

ANY women that date men, please take this poll:

strawpoll.me/18023539

Im far from a stacy, im pretty average looking and had to deal with childhood abuse. Perhaps if you spent less time playing video games and more time working on your social skills, you wouldnt get so triggered and call people sociopaths when they ask what you were up to.

How do I get a girl to teach me dating? ;_;

>with girls
I think social skills like dating/small talk should be taught in all basic schooling. Of course handsome, smart, charming guys are always going to be the most popular (though the 80/20 thing is absolutely exaggerated) but just browsing around here shows how poor the understanding of many men is of how a relationship actually forms. If you are an average guy on paper then you can win the most on flirting skills and conversational skills. No girls are not going to spontaneously notice you or fall in love with you in 9/10 cases. We developed whole social systems to even out the playing field and show off less instantly obvious desirable qualities. But a guy going "I don't understand how you go from talking to fucking" is obviously way way way out of touch with the stuff he should know to woo someone.

>general loneliness
It doesn't help that guys don't touch and usually don't develop deep emotional bonds (at a young age) with male friends. This is in part because of all the offerings (vidya, porn etc) to entertain and thus isolate guys who are already more awkward and introverted. Again, forced socialization I think is a must. Not 24/7 of course but some sort of team sport, nature club, creative pursuit, anything where you are forced to interact with others in a group. Yes this is most "betas'" nightmare but that's the thing, if you put it off it's coming around to bite you in the ass later in life.

I was in team sports and generally active, but I had a rough childhood, so that kinda messed me up. I already think about killing myself daily. :/

Not him, but no offense: this is a lot of words for something that otherwise does not provide an actionable solution.

I can see both of these playing a role. Should I just swallow my pride and be the one to message? And thanks for replying

Obviously this would be an arrangement I think is going to improve the general situation, nothing is a fix all for every individual with their own complex background.

We all have different baggage from the past and yes sadly for some that weight is infinitely heavier than for others. Again there is no magical cure but the best thing you can do is not run away and lose yourself in escapism, but be mindful so you can learn to recognize damaging patterns or hopeful changes. That is ultimately also a lot of what therapy does, which is 1. making sure you don't mindlessly go through life but keep track of where you are and where you want to be, 2. offer an outside perspective and help you reflect on the past in a way that makes things less set in stone and can help you create a narrative that's easier to live with and 3. build a healthy relationship that can strengthen you and serve as an example of what a mutually respectful and attentive bond looks like.
Many people find these hard to do without an outsider keeping their eyes on the road so to speak. But it is possible to achieve the same through self-reflection and reaching out to others.

It can also help to read novels of others who came from similar backgrounds and see how they dealt with it. Even if just to see an echo of your story and realize you are not as alone in this as you sometimes feel. Good luck user.

It's not a quick fix no, I don't believe such a thing exists. Imo a lot of the issues young men have no stem from childhood patterns and expectations.

I do think implementing these would mean future generations grow up with a better foundation for love (or friendship for that matter).

Yeah I would. I understand not wanting to but you don't want to get stuck in a "you don't reply? then I don't reply!" game you don't want to be playing. Just bring it up at the first chance you have to speak face to face or over the phone. If she gets defensive or hostile about it that's not a great sign.

No problem!

Based 6'2voters

>if girls said you didn't touch them enough I'd put my money on that they didn't feel like you liked them a lot and touching was just the most concrete, practical example of that.
is true that girls make such assumption?

I wasn't the one calling you a sociopath.
I just like memes

Well speaking for myself I can usually tell when a guy is attracted to me. Either lots of intense eye contact or having trouble maintain eye contact, a little flushed, big pupils, body language leaning into me, smiling a little just from looking at my face, giving me full attention etc. Touching can be part of that but doesn't have to be.

However people "feel" a lot they can't put down in words. If a guy doesn't show these signs it's quite possible a girl doesn't feel like he's really into her but she can't exactly put her finger on what gives her that impression. So she goes for the easiest example - he didn't even touch her at any point.

Yea, here's a question:
Why the fuck do some women allow themselves to be taken out on multiple dates, have hundreds spent on them, show pretty deep signs of affection, only to later say "ain't looking for anything serious"? I've just found out bad investments range out from being an entrepreneur

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She probably was looking for something serious but there was something about you she just didnt like and felt telling you the truth would be too hurtful. Not looking for anything serious is a cop out answer

I don't know anyone who does this and never have. But yeah some people are just users and see how far they can go.

Imo even if a woman is serious being 100% comfortable with a guy you are merely going on dates with spending hundreds of dollars on you is pretty fucking shady. Not wanting to split, okay I guess, but being entirely at ease with someone bending over backwards financially before you are even together really shows a lot.

Do women REALLY enjoy giving blowjobs? And do women REALLY like the taste of semen?

Oh yes. Some women actually love giving oral sex and even tasting cum. Like most things though it completely depends on the person.

Some girls are freaks for bjs and others aren’t.

I confessed my feelings for a girl and we decided to properly date but soon into it mostly due to my own hesitation, we are ghosting each other. I found her attractive and my feelings for her were true but as i progressed into this relationship more of my own flaws and insecurities began to emerge. A significant one is that my own future is uncertain so how can I expect her to devote her life to me? I cant be intimate and frank with her because to confess everything would be to stand naked, which I cannot and have never done. How do i end this relationship?

Depends on the person. I love giving blowjobs for the whole mental aspect, but physically it's not my favorite part of sex and I wouldn't like a partner who expects me to regularly go on for 10+ minutes, that would definitely make it a chore. Not that there's anything wrong with dicks and being face to face with a clean one of someone you love is neat, it's just pretty hard work.

The taste of semen depends a lot on the man and his diet. Again some women love it and find it no big deal at all others gag thinking about it. I'm in between I guess, swallowing is fine but I'm never going to drink it out of a cup or something.

If you're thinking of porn, it's definitely exaggerated there. Women don't moan like they're getting railed while giving head.

why can't i let my ex-gf go as in, i see her with her new guy and all i do is ask mutual friends what they think of him, if they agree with my vision of him/them ( i.e. they tell me he's boring, they look like brother and sister etc.) i hop on that train of "yeah feels good being right about all of it"

on one side, jealousy is a bitch on the other hand i'm not being a good ex boyfriend at all

If the dick is big and has good mouth feel: yes its enjoyable. The taste of semen is dependant on diet

If you truly want to end it tell her you realize you are not ready to share your life with someone, that you think she's great but getting close to her made you realize there's a lot of hang ups left.

Think about this long and carefully though. Right now you're feeling the stress and pressure and how scary it is. Two years down the line you might look back on this and feel like you had everything within reach and just abandoned it. Being intimate and frank with someone is the start of a mature, healthy and stable relationship and biting the bullet and going there is often the first step to mastering something.

I think a lesson you can learn here is not spending so much money on a women you barley know. They don’t need money blown on them right off the bat. They are trying to get a feel for you and see if there is a connection.

I don't even know man. Took her out to a dance, had an awkward time, but seemed to enjoy each others company. Fucking hell, even rented a Rolls Royce just to satisfy.

>Day of the Enamored approaching
>tfw no gf ;_;

I love giving blowjobs. It's probably my favourite sexual act.
Cum tastes and feels gross.

What do I say when my fwb says "I love you" during sex?

It doesn't mean anything, she just likes saying that during sex. But I feel awkward saying nothing back. Im not really into corny shit like that so saying "I love you too" feels cringe if not embarrassing to me.

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You weren’t a good boyfriend for her in the first place. Why would you need to be a good ex boyfriend. The reason you can’t let her go is because it hurts to much.

You don’t wanna deal with the pain so instead you hold onto it even though it hurts you still. Take the plunge and move on with your life. Plenty of fish in the sea.

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This fucking sucks but honestly man NEVER do this again. If it doesn't work out you wasted your money. If it does work out, either she's into you and you wasted the money because there was no need to pull out a fucking Rolls Royce (?!). OR it works out, and the Rolls Royce was necessary because you landed yourself a golddigger who would've moved on to another target to suck dry if she didn't think you'd throw money at her with little in return.

Also speaking for myself it would make me super uncomfortable if a guy obviously paid that much money for a date. It's not easy to give your feelings room to quietly develop when you realize he isn't just emotionally but actually financially invested in a future for you.

God damn fit trolling the poll

>You weren’t a good boyfriend for her in the first place.
well fuck me...

>niiiice

But seriously, if it makes you uncomfortable tell her to quit it, this is not standard and would put many people off.

If you don't mind, respond with a passionate
>and I looove [your body/fucking you]
if she truly doesn't mean to declare her love that shouldn't bother her. Tell her outside of sex that you're fine with her thing but you feel forced and awkward reciprocating because it's not a turn on to you, just an emotive thing.

Just telling the truth dude. It doesn’t mean you’re not a good person. She just doesn’t want you to be her companion. You wouldn’t be able to force your affection towards a girl you didn’t like. Don’t expect her to do that with you either.

i know user, i know and reading it and thinking about how her new guy is in contrast to me... bloody hell
>force her
nah i won't, but i'm bitter the way she treated me. hearing from friends from every side that they too think they won't last, i hate myself for clinging on to the slightest sliver of hope, i really do

To my defense, it was a big fuckin social event. You had fuckers bringing limos and shit

There was no reason to bring her there to begin with, you could've found another, more casual place to dance right?

Welp, I can definitely tell this was written by a woman or an effeminate man.

Any gender;
Would you consider it cheating if your girlfriend (or boyfriend) was sexting random strangers about how good you were in bed and how hot you were etc.? I'm conflicted. She refused to see anything of the other person and was clearly barely paying attention to what they wanted from her beyond listening to this stuff but she clearly sought people out to talk to about this stuff because they are definitely getting off to it.

Why spend so much money? Most of my dates with men involved just going for a few beers at the bar, and while all of them were nice and paid for my drinks, it wouldn't have been a problem for me to pay for my half. I was more than happy to spend time with them like that

Don't take her out or buy her anything expensive until it's agreed you have something more serious going on...

>spent less time playing video games and more time working on your social skills,

What does this even mean in practice? How does a 16 year old work on social skills? Do they really have the agency to do this?

They're probably in high school. So there in classes all day. Then there is a picking order / cliques.

Is dude suppose to just walk up to strangers and magically not be weird? And did you do this?

Women give all this vague shit advice because they feel entitled to some shit. They didn't do this shit. No one does this shit. Truth be told, the parents should have worked harder to socialize their kid starting at 13.

>>general loneliness
>It doesn't help that guys don't touch and usually don't develop deep emotional bonds (at a young age) with male friends. This is in part because of all the offerings (vidya, porn etc) to entertain and thus isolate guys who are already more awkward and introverted. Again, forced socialization I think is a must. Not 24/7 of course but some sort of team sport, nature club, creative pursuit, anything where you are forced to interact with others in a group. Yes this is most "betas'" nightmare but that's the thing, if you put it off it's coming around to bite you in the ass later in life.

This isnt a perfect fix. Homophobia has wrecked Male bonding. Just go over to fit and you will still find good looking sporty guys that are betas and have no idea how to talk to women.

Who would have known that hating men that fuck men would keep men from fucking women.

>dick is big
+6 inch?

How would you even come to that conclusion lol. I’m not a women nor am I all that effeminate. Wouldn’t say I’m a fucking chad but regardless. Don’t see why it matters anyway lol

Not that user but I'm a woman who got a lot better at socialization and I absolutely practiced. The main turning point came when I got my first call center job and needed to speak to fifty+ people daily.

Of course as a teenager some things are indeed not an option. But there's other ways than walking up to strangers and saying hi. Joining a club or getting a job forces you to interact with more/new people. Making an effort for people you don't naturally get along with, like friends of your parents or visiting family members, is a start. Not declining invitations because you don't know enough people or would rather spend your free time differently.

Nah it's not uncomfortable at all. I WANT to feed into her kinks but I just don't know what to respond with lol

Ultimately it was something she wished to attend as well. I saw an opportunity, and took it. I'll gladly admit I fucked up and spent too much money tho

Yes.
Any kind of sexual conversation with soemone who gets off to it is cheating.
Unless you both agreed to it, obviously.

It's not, but I don't think anything is a perfect fix, it's a complex issue with a lot of factors interacting. E.g. social media feeding into young people's insecurities and providing easy proof/examples for any angsty belief + endless technological entertainment giving less incentive to introverted guys to go out + the isolation of children in our current age where they no longer see married couples other than their parents interact, no longer have to sit around while their older siblings have a date over, no longer play as much in groups with varied age learning from older kids how they got to know girlfriends and so on.

Also I don't personally think homophobia is the main reason why men keep so many distance. A country like Turkey is much more homophobic than many places in the US but guys definitely touch and express physical affection there.

dubs of truth good advice for once

I'd just go with the compliment or stuff like
>yeah? let me hear it again
>prove it (if she's also submissive)
>moaning out her name

You can also respond with romantic stuff that is not as intense, like saying she's an angel, there's no other like her, basically things she can hear as reciprocation even if you are not literally saying it back.

I understand, just really really let this sink in, as painful as it is. You cannot control what other people do but you can control the kind of woman you're aiming for with your behavior. A quality girl won't expect you to impress her with stuff like this.

i don’t understand how a guy can debate over abortion with me in one instance and then later try to make out with me.

i mean there was alcohol involved but yeah. he leaned in and I moved my head and he got my cheek. kinda flattered but still feel awkward about it. )x

Anyone here try using meetups, the website, to meet girls/guys with similar interests?

I'm tempted to use it since I work in a field that's dominated by men that are 10-20 years older than me and I just broke up with my gf and have no idea where to begin

I accept that. Thanks for the advice man

Yeah I would. If my partner really needed this to feel good about themselves, or to get off, I wouldn't necessarily be against it, assuming this is all anonymous fleeting contact with faceless strangers. But finding out they did it against my back would definitely make me feel betrayed and would also make it a lot harder to believe that it didn't mean anything.

You're welcome, cheers user.

7+

Because he respects you for holding a stance? Guys don't take things as personal as you ladies do, that's the thing.

Whoooah getting along with people who have different opinions????

>I love giving blowjobs
Why?

>tfw 5.5 x 5.5
Well, this is sad.

Become a trap

Don't listen to trolls and/or size queens, you're firmly in the upper end of average. If anything a big member makes oral sex more difficult by the way.

Read this moderntantra.blogspot.nl/p/penis-size.html?zx=ccc44a1b2876942a

Thats not true at all. Women have to keep things from men SPECIFICALLY because they take things so personally, dont take rejection well and sometimes just completely lose it

>t. Dicklet
A small dick wont get you aroused and feels weird to suck. Like you’re blowing a child and not a man

I love feeling like my boyfriend's pleasure is entirely up to me. There's something very sexy about being in control of my partner.

i’ve been in relationships with people who were more conservative. guess it’s just been awhile and i’m kind of worried about the line of respect/boundaries someone really has for me. last guy i was with violated the NAP and hurt me pretty badly for trying to leave. made me feel like i wasn’t a person. i’m not really into hookup culture and kinda shy about that stuff so the kiss came by surprise.

I don't have a dick, fuck off.

To be fair, you shouldn't "expect" a kiss you never wanted. That's still a shitty move on his end. You're right to be uncomfortable.

Ok ms likes feeling child like penises in her mouth. Because 5 inches is like the size of a highschool boy

What is wrong about this?
I debate about abortion with my boyfriend, like I debate with him about all sorts of things.
And I suck his dick daily.

Non
Aggression
Pact
?

Women are just as emotionally irrational when they take rejection. Fuck off.

i’ve been in relationships with people who were more conservative. just about boundaries really. i love debate and all but i was questioning the line of respect/boundaries too. mostly from my experiences being in relationships with conservatives. i just met the guy that night.

I heard you can satisfy a woman with that size. The ideal as in perfect would be about 6 and over in girth but that's for women that like the biggest thickest penises. Your size is fine and the girth is more than enough.

Mine is a little longer than that but a little less thick so yours wins imo.

I don't get why bringing up the debating about abortion then.
People will try to kiss you if they like you. Just say no.

Is girth more important than length?

This whole thing is ridiculous, I can't believe so many men are genuinely willing to think the average dick size somehow fails at fucking and pleasing a woman.

yeah, that! i consider myself close to libertarian-socialism/green anarcho-com/soc. kinda feels weird to box in myself sometimes with labels.

Either gender. Containment post.
This is a little convoluted, but I have my reasons.
I have this friend. I'm not romantically or sexually into this friend not only because I'm not homosexual(?), but also for a very specific fact regarding them.

This person would say the following:
>Love is only real for a very select few numbers of people. For everyone else, there is no way to show that what they experience is no different from, say, friendship. After all, these cunts keep saying its a want, not a need. Since breeding is imperative and therefore the mating rituals relevant to it are of utmost importance, it makes no sense to say that a 'want' could factor into mating. The truth is that for most people, breeding is only a pleasurable means to an end as historically speaking, children were an investment.
>More importantly and even if there is temporary love, we have that saying that love is fleeting which has persisted through time. Past that is only basic human bonding. Disney love is not real
>[If I interrupt to say I agree that Disney love is not real:] so you agree with me then? What else do you have to go off of? They invented 'true love', romantic love. Some experience fake sort of love but it doesn't last. Transitions into bland bonding and dependency.

How would you sway them otherwise? Or at least to more healthy or sensible perspective?
I know there's the chance that I will never be able to really convince this person otherwise, but it brings me down. I'm sick of it.

Also, please ignore the dynamics of my relationship with this person.

I just don't know why I'm so sad. I don't know if my feelings are sourced from some natural base or invented by bitterness.
I'm just so confused for some reason and I'm not sure what to do when I'm unwell like this. I can see two things I can do and they feel like exact opposites.
I felt better when I tried a little, or at least, I felt more human. But if I hadn't fucked up the very last step, would it really last so well?

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Having dated both this is untrue. Women will appear more upset in the beginning but they have enough introspection to surround themselves with people who will help them feel better so they can get over it and feel better. Men will just try to deal with it by themselves, bury their feelings and refuse any kind of support. That is why women get over relationships faster: men sabotage their own mental health

You don't. You let people believe what they believe.
I understand why you feel sad, it saddens me that people don't believe in love and don't get to experience it to its fullest. But people come from different places and have different opinions on things.

I don't even know this person but I'm already irked. Are they one of those "you sheeple don't know love but obviously I am one of the few that do"...?

Anyway, I would just say that it sounds like they do hold on to a very idealized (Disney) version of love and compared to that no true love can exist. It depends on your definition. Unless your friend also thinks love between friends is an illusion, just because the unconditional utterly passionate and romantic love that can move past any obstacle isn't real doesn't mean that people don't feel a sincere connection for one another that cannot be reduced to just lust, or just comfort/habit.

Dependency is often used as a psychological term (using someone as a crux) but being simply depending on other people is the human condition. No man is an island etc.

For the record, I've seen quite a number of these threads now.
I'm in therapy and I've done a few things for my life. But I'm still struggling a little and I feel like I could start falling back again because of these lingering things.

I really wish I could be done with this now, but I know even if I finish this stage, there will basically be more of this.

I'm so confused.

>last guy i was with violated the NAP
based and redpilled

means he’s a hypocrite, no babies for him senpai