I'm literally never going to know what it feels like to put my penis in a warm, wet vagina, am I...

Where to find one?

It wont matter, ypu probably jerk off with a death grip so it wont feel as good as you think unless you stop that. Also go ask girls out or some shit, loser

I mean you could meet one and bang if you wanted

No vagina will ever be as tight as your hand.
Sex is overrated. No sex is ever going to feel as good as that 3rd fap of the day to some god-tier doujin that hits all the right fetishes.
I was exteremely disappointed when I had sex for the first few times.
Just find something you really enjoy and focus on that instead.

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See:

Yeah, cold, dry ones are just not as good.

Hire an escort.

Maybe not a 9 like her, but below average looking girls, sure you could.

Trust me, sex is grossly overrated.
It's as nice as a walk in the park in the sense that's an exercise you do along with the person you like. It's really nice but that's it.

On the sexual discharge topic, you are way better off with your hand and imagination. Your hand pressures your cock on the exact spots with the exact amount of force to make you paint a wall white.
Compare that to a pussy that does roughly the same pressure all around and can fucking hurt if you are not careful. Add to that the fear of impregnation, the physical work out, possible stress and bruises it leaves depending on where you sex.

The only thing going for it is the high you get of seeing her enjoying it too and the romantic connection it leaves.

I mean where do you live that women don’t exist? We need context

Heaven.

I live in a city, but what am I supposed to do, walk up to random women and ask to have sex with them?

>Being this virgin

Sex is more than penis in vagina
Sex is fulfilling because of the added intimacy and affection your partner gives you.

Women exist in my vicinity but all of them are strangers who have no mutual concerns.

Come on you can't be that clueless.
No, I don't suppose you have good enough game for that to work.
How about just chatting normally with them for starters?
If you have a nice conversation, you take their number and then you walk away and text them later.
It's not rocket science.

>How about just chatting normally with them for starters?
How do you get someone to stop what they are doing and talk to you?

>How do I live with this?
I'm a wizard and the no sex part doesn't bother me anymore, what bother me is the lack of companionship. Sometimes It's a pain in the ass to do things that could be so much easier with friends or a gf. Also the fear of having a stroke and being found days later because someone notice the rotting smell

Yes, that's how you get into Heaven.

>Die
>Get to heaven's door
>God comes and asks if I died a virgin and, therefore, didn't contribute to perpetuating the species he supposedly loves so much
>Yes
>Rewards with eternal life

wat?

I admire the working culture of your city, that women are never calmly at rest anywhere in public. I mean really?

>If you have a nice conversation, you take their number and then you walk away and text them later.

If i go outside and talk to some stranger i dont want to give them my phone number unless they were the most engaging person ive ever met.
I did this in school a couple times but only after i saw them everyday. I cant imagine doing the same with someone i meet at the dmv or taco bell.

Are you gay?
No?
Then stop being a bitch and get what you want by making some ego sacrifices and compromises. If sex was important enough to you, you’d be fucking 4’s and 5’s if you’re a 6 or something.

Not even working. If two people are having a conversation it is rude to butt in. If someone is on the phone or reading they dont want to be talked to. If someone is eating alone in a resturant it is weird to sit with them.

God only respects invitro fertilization. You never open a bible?

Also someone who singularly wants your attention can be alarming or suspicious.
At least to me.

Any woman who eats Taco Bell already has low standards, so maybe you should try.

>ah i see you got meat and cheese in a tube. Im more partial to meat and cheese in a semicircular pouch.

It’s alarming if they’re unattractive, but if you see something in them it’s easier to forgive the creep factor.

So any birth before we developed the technology for that is sinful, despite everything Jesus had to do on the entirety of the New Testament and the fact that was God himself that made us capable of procriating that way?

Look up Gnosticism. It was the first big sin of the church and it's the belief that anything that comes from the flesh is sinful. This theory was abandoned by the Church during it's first century and it's talked about to this day on the catechism to prevent it from plaguing the Church again.

Yeah, I think I know about the Bible.

Knowingly bothering people isnt how i was raised.

Nacho fries are back. All of that is irrelevant.

Okay, some girl comes up to you, tells you she finds you cute, has a pleasant chat with you and then asks you for your number, so you can meet again, you would not give it to her.

Also what kind of backwards ass logic is that?
It's a far greater risk asking someone for their number that you will see every day as opposed to someone you'll likely never see again.

Look, you guys can make excuses until the end times come, but this is what you'll have to do.
Pick up your balls and take action or don't and let things continue as they are now.
Choice is yours.

That makes it pretty easy to start a conversation right now, but what about when the fries have been back for a while and the novelty has worn off?

If you approach the whole thing as "bothering" someone, then yeah, it will be unpleasant for everyone involved.
The one and only motivation in your head should be "She is cute, I want to talk to her".
Your aura will be much different.

If he were capable of having engaging conversation with strangers he wouldn't be a virgin

>god refuses to reproduce through sex
>sex isn't immoral

Then they'll be gone for a few months again and I'll go back to getting a gordita box. That's their business model.

That's why you practice, holy shit you guys are like a bunch of toddlers.
NO, toddlers just talk to people without giving a shit.
Just be like toddlers.

> I'm literally never going to know what it feels like to put my penis in a warm, wet vagina, am I?

See that right there? That's fucking pussy repellent. You can get laid but instead you choose to be a limp wristed sadboi instead of bouncing back and continuing the hunt. There's plenty of cooch out there for everyone in this thread 300x over.

>you look like a friend I use to know, what’s your name?
That’s a better name than they had, well I guess so since I don’t remember it right now.
I’m *name*,it’s good to meet you.
(And if you aren’t a social idiot, carrying a conversation will be easy at this point.)

>God refuses to sex
Fuck you are a good troll.
Either that or you purposely forgot about everything that happens on the Bible that's more important than that, which is to say everything.

Either way, I don't see a reason to extend a conversation with a troll or someone that reads the Bible like it's a gossip magazine.

If they didn’t have high standards from rotting their soul with filthy sexy porn, maybe a nice chubby chick wouldn’t be so bad to spend a night with.

If a cute girl did talk to me out of the blue i would be confused honestly.

You fucking kidding? Chubby chicks are great.

>dude just lower your standards lol

I fucking hate this place, everyone is so out of touch it's fucking embarrassing.

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Not everyone has that luxury.

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Date down

That’s a guy, see the Adam’s apple?

Prostitutes.

4k will buy you a week in thailand on the brach with a cook and a prostitute of your choice.

You guys are fucking retarded, literally no woman has EVER showed an interest in me, I cant lower my standards you fucking cunts.

"Brandon" is also proof, but ya.

kekd and checked

It's not hard to see why with that attitude.

Do you somehow think you are entitled to 8s and 9s?
Lmao

Elliot, you have to initiate. Women wont just twirl their hair in your direction seductively and point towards their vaginas upon witnessing your magnificent form.
You have to make them attracted to you.

STOP TELLING ME TO LOWER MY STANDARDS

EVEN A 1 HAS NEVER BEEN INTERESTED IN ME

HOW WILL LOWERING MY STANDARDS HELP?

I didn't say lower your standards, I said get an attitude check. Nobody will date you if you're like that.

Me, the other posters and yourself all know damn well that you dont give ugly fat bitches a chance.
I bet if you went to walmart, hit up the diet coke isle, and charmed some fat bitch for her number, youd be drowning in her thighs that Saturday.

But you’re going for the professionals, the poker sharks, the ones that tear even top tier men apart and think you have a fucking chance?

I lost my virginity at 22. Not all hope is lost. Just start using dating apps and trying to talk to people

Why not change focus?
Those guys are focused on solving the wrong problem.
The real problem is that you don't know how to give that girl problem the right amount of importance.
If you give it too much importance people will find that creepy and needy. Nobody likes someone like that.

Instead, focus on yourself. The girl thing should warrant 0 concerns from you because it won't solve anything in your life.

Unless the reason you wanted a gf was escapism. Then you REALLY have to change your focus.

So either way, be more gentle to yourself. Hear yourself more, invest more in yourself.
If you say you can't because depression or whatever, then that's even more reason to focus on you.

Believe me, if you have depression the only thing that changes when you have a gf is that you feel like a weight on her. Work on yourself first.

ASK THE 1 OUT YOU ABSOLUTE MONG

>Elliot, you have to initiate. Women wont just twirl their hair in your direction seductively and point towards their vaginas upon witnessing your magnificent form.
>You have to make them attracted to you.
Answer wont change no matter how much you kick and scream

i'm 28 and a virgin
send help

OP, you need therapy. We keep telling you this every time you create one of these threads. Why won't you listen? You are mentally ill.

Pretty much a perfect example. Jacking off always feels better. But sex is good for others things too. Loosing your virginity is highly overrated if it's just to have sex. Sex isnt a magical "wow it felt so much better with a girl, now I can fuck all the girls"! Plus when you see that most girls bodies are just ok compared to pornatars it kinda sucks. But at the same time there is something great about getting a girl moaning and then cumming all over her body. Or better yet coming inside, girls seem to love that

No wonder he doesnt get pussy

It's great for different reasons, yeah.
Purely for orgasm sake, fapping is better.

Same.
Just the other day a cute cashier asked me my name, and I was completely dumbfounded.

Looks don't mean shit if your personality is shit, and being a social autist is a real shit personality trait.

Every thread I get the same stupid fucking vague "advice".

>you wont get a gf with that attitude bro
>just gotta believe in yourself
>ask her out :)
>lower your standards my man
>if you want a gf you wont get one
>just wash your hands after having a shit bro

I'm so FUCKING TIRED of this, I'll NEVER get a gf at this rate. I'm so fucking alone and I dont know what to do.

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Don't listen to them OP here is what you actually need to do, in very specific steps:

>Light torch
>Step forward
>Step back
>Turn 3 times
>Backflip

Voila! All weapons and medipacks!

Then keep doing exactly the same thing you social fucking retard

We can't teach you social adjustment. Get therapy because you actually unironically need it. You're in no position to date if this is how you are.

But like I said just keep doing the exact same fucking things.

Depends. If you live long enough you will be able to buy a cheap Chinese sexbot that will have a custom made pussy for your dick.

cope larp

What do you mean social adjustment?

Because you refuse to take advice. You don't actually want a gf. Maybe you are gay in denial.

You forgot
>go outside
>self improve
>hit the gym
Faggot.

You're too scared to approach, and until you stop being too scared, the best, most personalized advice won't help you.

My buddy is 29, overweight, models his personality off of Tony Soprano and other mobster movies. He's not physically attractive, but he's got that really unlikable kind of Sopranos confidence. To pick up chicks he just adds them on Facebook and sends the same copy-pasted message to them every time. Most of the time he's ignored, but enough times they respond, and he gets laid. He's gotten over 60 girls in his time. None of them have been dimes, but he's getting them.

Everything from not asking retard vague questions like "where do I find a girl" up to concepts like not having sex being okay with you and not sending you into neurotic conniptions. From knowing when to stop and leave well enough alone up to recognizing subtleties in body language and recognizing when situations need to be confronted or averted.

But, like, you're still in that elementary school mindset. All the boys hang out near the slides, all the girls hang out by the flowerbed. You're still locked in 'guys and gals,' there's this gigantic and empirical separation of the genders to you; veritably they're alien to you.
Whether by your design, because of the internet or by poor circumstance, you live in a microcosm you've chosen to call 'the world,' and you understand nothing on any level but that of which I'd fully expect from a 12 or 11 year old. You're a mention of cooties away from being told you're underaged, honestly.

You need help, not Jow Forums. We cannot teach you social graces you clean missed out on and what's more, since you're probably going to parry this with another excuse, we can't help you with your entitlement complex.

lift weights
the femoids here will tell you that your body doesn't matter but that's horse shit
you will be forgiven a lot more for your social fumbling if you are sexually appealing

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pussy isn't really that great. if you think some chick's birth canal is going to give you redemption, you need to adjust your life

You may think I’m vague but I promise you this will work.
>get some hobbies
>gym is optional but it can help, start at home if you’re nervous
This is a big one and probably the most important one.
>talk to more people, girls, guys, friends, it doesn’t matter who they are just talk to more people.
Eventually it will lead to more friendships, and those friendships will lead to a gf and sex. Whether it’s one of those friends or someone you meet through those friends, or someone you meet by improving your talking skills/confidence and going up to someone.

>just stop wanting sex lol
K thanks.

I've done it. It's not worth it. If I had two buttons in front of me one labeled "relive all the sex you have had" and "go back in time to stop yourself from fucking" I would happily push the second.

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I'm not gay.

But I dont have any women to approach?

I cant help being born an autistic retard.

you forgot to say that he has to make friends with well adjusted people
you can have 100 weeb sperg friends and never ever get laid

That's what I mean you fuck, get goddamn therapy
People have been adjusting autists for years. Succ the bullet, say to someone you suspect you are an autism and go get therapy. Bonus points, you probably become eligible for autismbux.

The problem is I can't help you get girls if you won't help yourself do sweet fuck all but fap in the first place, guy

Listen to this guy.
You need to be fine with yourself to be fine with someone else.

Also, do therapy, it works miracles. You could be in a situation that you can not leave only by yourself, there is no shame in asking for help.
Talk to people you know for advice or recommendations.

This could also be a good step. It's like a training ground for being used to interact with girls, touching them and everything.
Believe or not my psychotherapist recommended this to me when I was having trouble with past relationships.

>men act like they enjoy your company and take initiative in conversations
>women act completely nonchalant or standoffish
No shit they're alien. Being yourself works for a very specific kind of person.

pay a fucking escort or hooker and shut up or just shut the fuck up

>I was exteremely disappointed when I had sex for the first few times.

I bet she was too